Stories of birth

Three children, three different births. No. 1, I had pre-eclampsia very badly and was in hospital for weeks before the birth. I almost died, baby almost died, born at 28 weeks. Second one ‘normal’ hospital delivery, 36-hour labour, 9lb baby. Third one, born in the ambulance on way to hospital 100 miles away! I’ve often told them all about their births, whether they want to know or not!

My mum told me I was 'forceps delivery' and one of my sisters was born in an ambulance in a snowstorm where it was struggling to get to the hospital in time.
My 3 children were all born in 2 hours from my first sign of labour to delivery. Apparently I didn't feel the first stage with any of them, and slept through it.
My children have never asked about it though.

My mother told me several times that mine was a difficult birth. It was in a post-war maternity home. I was born with the cord around my neck and my mother was 'very ill' for some three weeks afterwards so I was kept in another room and looked after by the staff. She never had another child - probably the experience put her off for life. What 'very ill' meant she never elaborated.

Mines always open to discussion, my family think it was hilarious that been autistic I felt no pain (total different perception of pain as many) and because of that the midwife wouldn't believe me when I said I was in labour. She delayed and kept saying I'd know when I was (I did know, I just didn't feel the pain she wanted me to) the doctor came into examine me while I was playing on Facebook games. He confirmed I was 9 1/2 centimetres dilated, which I then updated via Facebook. Which family believed it was my husband at first. Then the doctor told me to push and didn't get a reaction and was shocked to realise I was still on Facebook.

I have a concern about this thread.

My first delivery was largely uneventful. 2 hours later a nurse came to check I was okay and I was lying in a huge pool of blood. I was hurriedly transfer ed to the local Maternity hospital ( my daughter was born in the GP run hospital). 12 hours later I was taken to theatre and a large internal tear was repaired. And I required 3 pints of blood. I didn't get to see my baby for 2 days as she was kept in the nursery. My second bort was uneventful and I was home in 48 hours.

I was born at home 49 years ago (50 in January!) Last of 4 girls, apparently mum said, "babies coming" 15 minutes later I was born! Had to go to hospital though soon after, apparently I had jaundice and spent time under a lamp.

I only told them how easy they were to give birth to. Shortest labout 45 minutes and longest 3.5 hours. No pain meds needed, it was just a balance to some of the horror stories they had heard.

My Mum told me that when she gave birth to my brother in 1948 at home there was no pain relief. The District Nurse was in attendance and tied a towel around the metal rails on the bedhead and Mum had to squeeze and twist it as the pains got worse. It was the same for my birth a few years later but I think by the time another brother came along in 1956 there was a bit of pain relief.

When I was pregnant with my 1st I was surprised if not horrified by some of the birth stories I heard. It was as though I had been admitted to a private club only mothers allowed.

Millie22

I have a concern about this thread.

Why what is your concern?

Many are what? sarahcyn?
Sorry, seem to have lost the context here!

I wondered that too sazz1

sazz1

Millie22

I have a concern about this thread.

Why what is your concern?

New poster starting the thread?
Posters too forthcoming and helpful?
Book? TV series? Film?

Callistemon21

sazz1

Millie22

I have a concern about this thread.

Why what is your concern?

New poster starting the thread?
Posters too forthcoming and helpful?
Book? TV series? Film?

Gosh, I never thought of that.
#gullible of Glasgow. 😠

I had two boys both by Caesarean - I have always felt cheated.

Granless

I had two boys both by Caesarean - I have always felt cheated.

you really must not. It does not matter at all how your baby was delivered. The important thing is to have a healthy baby unlike so many who didn't make it.

My dad was married to a woman who didn’t want or couldn’t have children. They were divorced, something quite unusual and rather shameful back then. He then married my mum who was 12 years younger than him. She had miscarriage after miscarriage. One baby, a boy, did reach full term. Not sure if he was still born or died shorty afterwards but dad wouldn’t let them take the body away. Mum always said if she had a baby that lived it would be on the front pages of the newspapers and I was because I was a New Year’s Day baby. Born premature but thankfully healthy. It must have been awful for my mum given that dad had married her because he was desperate to have children. She spent some time in a mental hospital years later: I don’t think she ever recovered from those years of losing babies. I never talked to her about it, even when I had my own babies although I never thought it was a given that you married and automatically had children. I didn’t believe that I would have a baby until she was born and I was holding her. Mum did tell me that she had two wombs which is what caused her problems. I wish I could turn the clock back and talk to her about it. They never had another child. I was it: the only one. My daughter isn’t interested in her birth story or mine.

I have discussed my experiences of birth with my two daughters. Both births were horrendous in different ways. The birth of my elder daughter was so bad that it was referred to the NCT as a case of what shouldn’t happen . They interviewed me to ask how it could be changed for my second birth . This was a much better experience but the early stages if the pregnancy were a nightmare that took me a long time to recover from. All this affected and informed the choices made by my daughters and their experiences were very positive as a result .

I have shared it with my 2 girls yes. They didn't seem to be particularly interested or bothered by it.

Birth of daughter 1 - I had just turned 20, went into labour and rang my mum. She cycled up to where I lived at the time and brought me a scotch egg "to keep my energy up." then cycled home again. My husband (at the time) said I had really better be in labour because he was skint and we would have to walk back from the hospital if not. 20 hours later, after a lot of syntometrine to try to speed things up, she was born. I was torn to shreds.

Birth of daughter 2 - I was almost 43. The birth was very different because I was classed as a geriatric mother and was a bit overweight so they probably thought I might die in childbirth so a lot of care was taken - flight socks, as much painkiller as I needed etc. So a lot easier.

I am not with either of my daughters dads any longer - I felt a bit let down by them during the experience to be honest - obviously it was down to a lot more than the childbirth experience though.

I have told them how different it was in 1947 and in 1949 to now. Then husbands were sent away back to work while wives were giving birth. During the ten days in hospitable days were Wednesdays and Sundays for two hours

Visiting hour.

I share the concern of Millie23. Look at some of the OP’s subsequent posts.
For myself, certainly not re talking to my adult DD about their births. After the stage of endlessly comparing each moment with friends from my ante-natal groups I’ve felt that there cannot be too little said on the subject,

winterwhite i think that you can talk to anyone about general things about a birth without going into great detail. My mother told me I was three weeks overdue, so she was taken into hospital for induction and she told me that wartime conditions meant it was 2 days after I was born before she heard or saw from anyone. It was nearly a week before she heard from my father, away on war service.

That sort of information is both general and not intimate.

It is a family joke that DD's arrival in this world was as rapid as DS's was slow and that it typifies who they are. DS has always hated change and just didn't want to change one location for another, while DD is always rushing around trying new things going new places.

Again, broad detail that feeds into DC personalities without giving any intimate detail.

Helen63

There was a wonderful tv series (and book) called Labour of Love that had an episode about birth. I was thinking that now I’m retired I could duplicate the record of such experiences of women today who birthed many years past. What do you all think?

Didn't Sheila Kitzinger (and others) do this years ago?

I think birthing is exactly as it was all those years ago...

Good, Bad, Quick, Slow, Damaging, Healing...

I think the medicalisation of birth is similar (with different indignities, benefits and challenges). We still have too few midwives and not enough real choice.

Would it actually add anything?