A young Mum instructs a Gran.

I would like to say, I don't find it exhausting to change with the times and listen to how parenting has changed, so I don't think anyone finds it exhausting to have me around. I do hope they tell me if I am being rather overbearing. I wouldn't want that to fester.

It must be exhausting looking for faults continuously and exhausting trying not to make any Allsorts.

This current practice if having to watch every comment in case there's a hidden message, which there isnt, is enough to see why so many youngsters have mental health issues. Some of the unpleasant posts about a good baby a good example, for good I would just think of as an easy baby, I had one that was pleasant and easy, another who was pleasant but screamed when put down, woke in the night frequently until he was one screaming but just wanted to be picked up,as he thought it was day and it wasn't so easy. That's just life. People get upset if they are called love or darling by an elderly person when they are just being nice. It must be exhausting looking for faults continuously.

Chocolatelovinggran

Oh Allira, you underestimate my Toblerone chomping ability..
I used the word no in my classroom ( Early Years Teacher), to the horror of some parents. . I would explain why, but no is a complete sentence. I want children to know that, and use it when needed.

I remember buying a franed picture for DD2 when we were on a shopping trip:
"Exactly which part of 'No' don't you understand?"

Wow NotSpaghetti five children, I found my twins enough of a handful.
Ah , the big bad ‘I said NO!’ I used that quite a lot as well as ‘we will have to wait and see’ usually followed by their dismal wails.
My two turned out well as am sure your five did too.
Let’s all treat ourselves to a whole Toblerone to save on any squabbling.😁

Oh Allira, you underestimate my Toblerone chomping ability..
I used the word no in my classroom ( Early Years Teacher), to the horror of some parents. . I would explain why, but no is a complete sentence. I want children to know that, and use it when needed.

I was going to say, it's who can eat the fastest although it would be difficult to put more than one piece of Toblerone in your mouth at once.
You'd need storage pouches like a hamster.

With the Toblerone it's tricky!
I'd do what I did with cakes and my children - the one that cuts it gets last "dibs" on which slice!

On Gransnet maybe one person would gobble it up quickly though - before I'd found a knife!

Oreo I have sadly "lost" a long post which I thought was posted.

I haven't used "naughty" with my 5 children or 7 grandchildren because I don't think it is easily understood.

So for example it's easier to understand that cars are dangerous and you need to hold hands when walking along the pavement incase you slip or trip up into the traffic than to say it was "naughty" to let go/pull away.

I only had one child who had occasional tantrums. I would try reasoning (or in dire situations picking up) but if there was no joy I'd say "I'll wait here till you feel better" or similar.
Yes it's annoying if you are out and about. I would have definitely picked him up (however awkward) if it had ever happened in a restaurant or hospital or church for example.
This didn't ever happen.
It was usually obvious what the issue was to be honest (- most notably choosing a toy for his favourite friend's birthday and wanting to keep it for himself)!

The word I did use quite a lot that one of my daughters doesn't like is "No" - but, in my defence I have always said why - anc still do.

I'm just an ordinary grandmother doing the best I can - having been, like all of us, a mum doing the best I could.

👩‍🎓

Correct! Go to the top of the class😃

Oreo

Ah, maffs!
If nine Gransnetters had to split a Toblerone equally, taking account of age, colour of hair, type of politics and different POV’s how many pyramid pieces would each one receive?😁

One each and two for teecher.

Ah, maffs!
If nine Gransnetters had to split a Toblerone equally, taking account of age, colour of hair, type of politics and different POV’s how many pyramid pieces would each one receive?😁

NotSpaghetti

What does it mean Allira though?

Well, I think it might mean the opposite of naughty.

During lockdowns one kind Gransetters held Maffs Maths lessons and some pupils were very norty.
I think it meant good attentive, well-behaved, diligent and very good at Maffs Maths.

What would you say to your badly behaved four year old out of interest? A child does understand naughty behaviour and when they do it.When a child misbehaves there could be many reasons for it but the bottom line is that it isn’t acceptable and a Mum in a supermarket shopping with a tantrummy child isn’t going to sit them down and act as a child psychologist.The child has to learn that whatever they’re doing isn’t going to be acceptable to their parent.
I do know what you mean of course but ‘naughty behaviour’ is actually easier for a child to understand than any complex explanation IMO.

What does it mean Allira though?

All babies are "good" in my opinion.
Always have been.

What about norty?

Used to be a favourite on GN in the good old days!

Ha ha!
naughty has always been "out" for me!

Right, so the word good is out and now naughty 😂

I hate the (silly in my opinion) word "naughty". It tells us nothing and, in my opinion, doesn't help little ones understand anything.

Just saying.

I know lots of people choose to use it.

BlessedArt

Better to label the behaviour, not the child.

Generally speaking, nowadays there seems to be little middle ground between thoughtless language and precious, over correction. What ever happened to people giving each other grace?

Might be nice to see an example of that in your judgemental responses

BlessedArt

And others are too busy shouting at the clouds about those “down wiv da kids”and times changing that they can’t see they are being left behind. The world doesn’t stop spinning and society doesn’t stop evolving just because you can’t cope with change.

Calm down, dear!

If you take the meaning of 'good' the wrong way then seek psychiatric help. It doesn't mean there is a bad baby.

Oreo

BlessedArt

And others are too busy shouting at the clouds about those “down wiv da kids”and times changing that they can’t see they are being left behind. The world doesn’t stop spinning and society doesn’t stop evolving just because you can’t cope with change.

Oh deary deary me! 😄

Keep up at the back, Oreo 😂

Although I think I fell off the roundabout ages ago.