Am I being umreasonable?

Could you not collect the children from school but go to your home to cook and all eat together there ?

Don't allow yourself to be taken for granted.
Seems like they view you as staff to provide a service.
So they won't drop in on you if there's no advantage to them in doing so.
I've seen this so many times.
Are you paying for the groceries too.
Just get a t shirt with a doormat logo.

Yorklady well I guess I could but it just makes mess in my house. I do have some health issues which make me tired and a bit slow. What I am looking for is one or two spontaneous visits. Have my grandchildren in my home

Welkbeck you are completely right. Everything is completely to suit them. They are very self focused. I am really just looking for some ideas how I can nudge it around a bit.

What Yorklady says. I preferred to bring them to my house. I liked to prepare the food in my kitchen. Very often , my daughter used to do sone shopping, but tbh it wasn’t a big deal. I didn’t mind doing that, but used to smile when little granddaughter preferred her other Nan’s cooking. I would say, well D , when you’re in Nan’s house, you must eat what Nancooks for you 😂 - to be fair, her Gran is an excellent cook, especially her cakes…..