Gransnet forums

Gransnet cafe

Welcome to the *Gransnet Café. This is a non-judgemental space for you to pop in for a cuppa with some virtual friends, seek out advice for a particular problem, or share an update on your life - important or trivial. Feel free to have your say and chat about your day, but please leave any arguments at the door. If you're struggling to find someone to talk to in real life, or are simply looking for a bit of a chat, this is the place for you.

How much should I give best friend's grandson who is going to be travelling for six months?

(113 Posts)
Betony Mon 23-Feb-26 16:00:09

I'm talking about my best friend's grandson, not my own. However, I'm very fond of this hard working 19-year old, and would like to give him some money for when he goes travelling abroad for six months. Any suggestions on how much I should give? I'm not talking about a fortune here, but an important consideration is not to cause jealousy/resentment from his younger brother, or younger members of my own family. Maybe the whole idea is wrong! Thanks in advance.

keepingquiet Mon 23-Feb-26 16:04:01

Ask your friend. If she's giving him some, don't give more than she has.

My niece saved up to go travelling and had loads of money from her gran. I didn't give her anything...

BlueBelle Mon 23-Feb-26 16:07:53

Personally I would nt be giving to someone’s else’s grandson other than perhaps a travelling gift. My own grandkids that are travelling ( 2 in separate parts of the world at the moment) I gave £100 to help them on their way and to feel I was part of their fun, in exchange they have sent me loads of photos which I m grateful for, they don’t know it yet but I m making them each an album of their travels.

SueDonim Mon 23-Feb-26 16:17:14

It’s never crossed my mind to do that for anyone’s grandchild and no one has ever done it for my grandchildren. I think it’s a bit odd, but maybe it’s something that happens in other places.

BlueBelle Mon 23-Feb-26 16:19:20

Me neither SueDonim never occurred to me to give to someone else’s child or grandchild
No one gave to mine either !

NotAGran55 Mon 23-Feb-26 16:35:31

Why do you feel it necessary to give him anything?
When my son went travelling 12 years ago nobody gave him any money,not even us. He worked for 6 months and saved up to go.
We bought him a decent rucksack but that was it.

justwokeup Mon 23-Feb-26 16:43:59

I wouldn’t necessarily give money but maybe a useful item - a set of trackers for his keys, luggage, ipad, phone etc - could be useful for a young person. Otherwise something he still needs like a pack away waterproof? Your friend would know.

Sago Mon 23-Feb-26 16:50:03

I wouldn’t be giving him anything.

Astitchintime Mon 23-Feb-26 16:58:14

This wouldn’t cross my mind tbh. I have my own DGC to support……..no one else’s are my responsibility.
Howver, OP if you feel you want to then give what you can afford…….but halve it, hold one half back and tell him, if he gets into difficulty he can contact you for the rest.

Shelflife Mon 23-Feb-26 17:09:45

My advice - dont do it !

Cabbie21 Mon 23-Feb-26 17:20:33

A small gift would be suitable. Do you normally give him money for birthdays, Christmas, or is this a one off gesture? £30?

Sadgrandma Mon 23-Feb-26 17:31:13

I don’t think I would give him money, especially if it is likely to set a precedent with his siblings and your own grandchildren. Why don’t you say to your friend that you would like to give him a little gift and ask her if there is anything (small) that he needs. Someone suggested a tracker which would be a good idea.

silverlining48 Mon 23-Feb-26 17:39:30

I don’t understand why you feel you should give your friends gs money for travel. Many years ago both my dds travelled and I dont remember giving them money and no one else gave them money either.
They had after school jobs which they saved and used for their trips. They also worked when they were away.
If you give it to one you have to do it for any others.

M0nica Mon 23-Feb-26 17:46:11

What does it matter whether it has never occurred to other posters to do this. I expect all of us at some time or another do something that it would never occur to anyone else to do.

The OP wants to give this lad, whom she knows well and likes, a little booster to help him on his way. What a lovely idea.

I would give him £100, large enough to be appreciated, not to large to put a burden of gratitude on his shoulders.

paddyann54 Mon 23-Feb-26 17:46:20

I bought a friends gs a T Shirt with Scottish words on it ,and gave him £200 .he came back after a year away and said the t shirt was constantly on.as it was a great ice breaker .
That was a few years ago now you can buy these online I got his from a cousin who has a printing firm…..maybe I started a trend."lol

Doodledog Mon 23-Feb-26 17:55:28

I agree with M0nica, and also with justwokeup. I think I would get him a gift - maybe a travel wallet or something like that. You could always put a bit of currency in it if you wanted to.

Rosie51 Mon 23-Feb-26 17:56:52

I agree M0nica that just because it hasn't occurred to other posters to give a gift is no reason for Betony not to.

When my eldest grandson went to University, we gave him money for freshers week, and so did his uncles and aunts. He finished up with his entertainment budget for the first couple of terms being covered.

I've given to nephews and nieces when they've gone to University or travelling. If you can afford it and want to why not?

BlueBelle Mon 23-Feb-26 17:59:54

Doodledog how can you agree with Monica if you are saying just a gift ….Monica says ££100 ??
I think that’s well excessive for a grandchild of someone else

MandL Mon 23-Feb-26 18:03:32

I think it’s a lovely idea- depending on your budget £50-100?
I’m sure he will really appreciate it 😊

Doodledog Mon 23-Feb-26 18:07:09

BlueBelle

Doodledog how can you agree with Monica if you are saying just a gift ….Monica says ££100 ??
I think that’s well excessive for a grandchild of someone else

I agree with M0nica that just because others wouldn't give anything there is no reason why the OP shouldn't, and I agree with justwokeup that a gift is a good idea - maybe with some money included if she likes.

I can agree with two people at the same time grin

Jaxjacky Mon 23-Feb-26 18:12:21

I’d give £50 for a decent meal out before he went!

SORES Mon 23-Feb-26 18:24:28

justwokeup

I wouldn’t necessarily give money but maybe a useful item - a set of trackers for his keys, luggage, ipad, phone etc - could be useful for a young person. Otherwise something he still needs like a pack away waterproof? Your friend would know.

ipad? phone? luggage?

Allira Mon 23-Feb-26 18:33:07

SueDonim

It’s never crossed my mind to do that for anyone’s grandchild and no one has ever done it for my grandchildren. I think it’s a bit odd, but maybe it’s something that happens in other places.

Me neither!

Mind you, mine haven't gone travelling yet, so perhaps some kind friend might do so when, or if, they do. 🙂

I might send a Bon Voyage card

Allira Mon 23-Feb-26 18:34:58

SORES

justwokeup

I wouldn’t necessarily give money but maybe a useful item - a set of trackers for his keys, luggage, ipad, phone etc - could be useful for a young person. Otherwise something he still needs like a pack away waterproof? Your friend would know.

ipad? phone? luggage?

We bought our own children backpacks
On reflection, it was a mistake!

What about a money/passport wallet Betony? One that goes round the waist, hidden under clothes?

Allira Mon 23-Feb-26 18:35:32

Ps you would need to put a $ or two in it for luck.