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Welcome to the *Gransnet Café. This is a non-judgemental space for you to pop in for a cuppa with some virtual friends, seek out advice for a particular problem, or share an update on your life - important or trivial. Feel free to have your say and chat about your day, but please leave any arguments at the door. If you're struggling to find someone to talk to in real life, or are simply looking for a bit of a chat, this is the place for you.

Funeral dress code in 2026

(60 Posts)
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Silverballoon Fri 24-Apr-26 14:46:27

I attended my first funeral in about 8 years (luckily I haven't had to attend many in my lifetime- im 62) solo.

First time at local crematorium.

I wore navy maxi dress id purchased 8 years ago for that entire purpose. I dont like to wear black, i have a very colourful sense of style.

I felt so out of place, because others were wearing a mixture of jeans, casual & office wear, or not in dark clothing at all.

Now I have NO PROBLEM with this at all. But when did this all change?

I was being stared out constantly whilst outside the building.

Now this is of course due to the fact i knew no-one and they didnt know me. Curiosity and nosey people were expected. I was on my own. As an introvert I hated this attention. so i would have wished to fit in a bit more.

I just wanted to honour and remember my friend and thats why i stepped outside of my comfort zone and attended.

I feel out of the loop...what are your thoughts?

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cornergran Sat 25-Apr-26 20:46:08

If it’s feasible I ask about dress code. We seem to have been to far too many funerals in the last few years. Most have been ‘it doesn’t have to be black’, a couple specified light or bright clothes, another said it doesn’t matter just be there. The most recent did request traditional funeral attire. Sitting at the back of the full crematorium all I could see was black on young and not so young. If I’m unsure I wear navy or grey. For myself when my time comes I truly dont care what people wear, whatever they are comfortable in would be fine.

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TheSunRisesInTheEast Sat 25-Apr-26 21:44:53

I always wear black at a funeral. For me it is a sad day, nothing about losing a loved one would make me want to wear colourful clothing, my clothes reflect my mood. I get that for some people they want to wear colourful clothes and see a funeral as a celebration of the life lived, but I see a funeral as a sombre occasion and view dark clothing as a mark of respect to the deceased and to the bereaved family.

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SpinDriftCoastal Sun 26-Apr-26 07:48:56

I think if you look neat, are suitably covered, most things go. It can be a bit distracting if people turn up in something glaringly obvious as if to say 'look at me'. I think it is about respect for the person and family so keep it low and cool would be my advice.

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PamelaJ1 Sun 26-Apr-26 08:03:11

One or two posters have stated that they they think it’s odd for someone to wear a maxi dress.
I thought a maxi dress ended mid calf? I’ve got quite a few of them and wear them to all sorts of events. They seem quite acceptable to me.

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Moth62 Sun 26-Apr-26 08:32:34

I think a maxi dress ends at ground level and a midi dress (much loved by me in the early 70s) ends at calf level. Re the poster asked if only close family should wear black at a funeral, I have never heard that before, so I googled it. AI firmly stated that no, it is not only close family who are expected to wear black at a funeral.

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Oreo Sun 26-Apr-26 09:10:55

TheSunRisesInTheEast

I always wear black at a funeral. For me it is a sad day, nothing about losing a loved one would make me want to wear colourful clothing, my clothes reflect my mood. I get that for some people they want to wear colourful clothes and see a funeral as a celebration of the life lived, but I see a funeral as a sombre occasion and view dark clothing as a mark of respect to the deceased and to the bereaved family.

I agree.
Unless there’s a specific instruction from the family concerned to wear a certain colour, then a funeral is different from a celebration of life ceremony.

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Silverballoon Sat 02-May-26 12:46:31

I totally agree with you. Black is a horrible color , not really a colour is it.

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dragonfly46 Sat 02-May-26 12:53:38

The last funeral I went to was for a very dear friend and her DH asked that we wear bright colours!

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nanna8 Sat 02-May-26 12:54:03

I think just smart casual. I wouldn’t wear jeans, personally, as for me it lacks respect. I have been to many funerals in my capacity as president of a club and they do vary. Some are more celebratory than others . For the last one I went to we were asked to wear something purple because of the team colours of that person’s favourite sporting team.

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