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Funeral dress code in 2026

(15 Posts)
Silverballoon Fri 24-Apr-26 14:46:27

I attended my first funeral in about 8 years (luckily I haven't had to attend many in my lifetime- im 62) solo.

First time at local crematorium.

I wore navy maxi dress id purchased 8 years ago for that entire purpose. I dont like to wear black, i have a very colourful sense of style.

I felt so out of place, because others were wearing a mixture of jeans, casual & office wear, or not in dark clothing at all.

Now I have NO PROBLEM with this at all. But when did this all change?

I was being stared out constantly whilst outside the building.

Now this is of course due to the fact i knew no-one and they didnt know me. Curiosity and nosey people were expected. I was on my own. As an introvert I hated this attention. so i would have wished to fit in a bit more.

I just wanted to honour and remember my friend and thats why i stepped outside of my comfort zone and attended.

I feel out of the loop...what are your thoughts?

ginny Fri 24-Apr-26 14:59:28

I’ve always wondered why dark colours were expected at such sad occasions. Funerals for me are to celebrate the life of the departed.
The colour of the clothes you wear does not signify respect. The fact that you attend is respect.
Of course swimwear or looking really dirty or unkempt might not go down too well.

Cossy Fri 24-Apr-26 15:00:03

It seems that the family often communicate “instructions”

When I attended my Aunty’s funeral a couple of years ago we were asked to be colourful and casual, I said the same at my DMs funeral.

I think it really depends nowadays, people can and do wear casual clothes for many occasions, I was quite shocked at my daughters wedding to see how co casually some of the guests were dressed (not on our side of the family haha), people don’t dress up in church, theatres, all expensive hotels and restaurants anymore. Unless, of course, the venue insists on formal or smart dress.

muckandnettles Fri 24-Apr-26 15:07:23

I'm attending a funeral in a week's time and I'm going all out black. The funeral is for a very old lady I've known throughout my life and she would be horrified by anything other than black for a funeral. Obviously I know she won't know anything about it, but I will. So I think it can all depend. For my mother's funeral I wore a grey suit because I knew she hated black on me (or anyone really).

Casdon Fri 24-Apr-26 15:17:26

It depends on the person who has died, their personality and wishes. The last funeral I went to saw most people dressed up smartly, in dark colours, but not necessarily black. He was a smart dresser himself who cared what he looked like, and it would have felt disrespectful to attend wearing jeans.

Dontcallmelove Fri 24-Apr-26 15:20:11

My mum was Greek and at her funeral black was expected. Mil turned up in a light tartan skirt and red jumper. I was mortified, more from the point of view that she really stood out and so she would have been upset. We have been to too many funerals over the past couple of years and people were dressed in all sorts of colours but mainly darker ones. When my husband dies, the instruction will be brights. He hates me in black. Mine will be whatever you are comfortable in.

Sago Fri 24-Apr-26 16:10:28

Unless stated otherwise I would always wear dark colours.
I have a black Jaeger dress from 25+ years ago that I usually drag out.

I am always surprised at what people deem appropriate for a funeral.

To be fair I think a maxi dress is more evening/holiday attire.

tanith Fri 24-Apr-26 16:11:10

I think people wear what they are comfortable with nowadays. I wore my husbands favourite dress to his funeral I know he would of loved it, but I got a few disapproving looks from his bowls club ladies, Well it was white with large flower pattern 🙂

Jaxjacky Fri 24-Apr-26 16:15:40

The last funeral we went to, a friend’s husband, most people wore jeans, the hearse had a motorbike escort, he was only in his 50’s.
It does depend on the family of the deceased and their guidance.

Cabbie21 Fri 24-Apr-26 16:16:15

For my husband’s woodland burial all I said was that black was not expected, partly because I knew that several family members did not possess any black clothes, but mainly to reflect the beautiful setting, with blossom on the trees.
Black just seemed wrong. I wore a turquoise and navy dress in fairly subdued tones. Others wore navy. My stepson, as I expected, wore shades of brown and beige but his young daughter had been bought a black dress! Just so weird.

Chardy Fri 24-Apr-26 16:26:34

I went to neighbour's funeral - 1990? And wore a black skirt and jacket, no-one else wore black. I think others wore what was just described as office wear

BlueBelle Fri 24-Apr-26 16:30:56

Well I m a very old lady and the thought of funerals and black makes me shiver, I hate depressing black clothes, I m not having a funeral, can’t stand them, but I want the brightest jolliest colours at my ‘tea party’ I hope people can chat and laugh and raise a few glasses to me in bright, happy, clothes.

Cossy Fri 24-Apr-26 16:35:43

BlueBelle

Well I m a very old lady and the thought of funerals and black makes me shiver, I hate depressing black clothes, I m not having a funeral, can’t stand them, but I want the brightest jolliest colours at my ‘tea party’ I hope people can chat and laugh and raise a few glasses to me in bright, happy, clothes.

That sounds divine!!

boheminan Fri 24-Apr-26 16:39:53

I've just returned from the funeral of a dear friend. He stated he did not want anyone wearing black, so all the folk wore a variety of styles and colours that he would have loved (I wore my beloved old DM's, jeans and a red tee-shirt). The service was performed by a celebrant and was wonderfully relaxing, with a lot of humour that my friend would have enjoyed. It was a wonderful afternoon - just as he would have wanted. On coming out, the next funeral was gathering outside, with everyone in black - their choice! Our difference.

This is how funerals how evolved over the years, the last one I attended over 20 years ago, everyone wore black and it was conducted by a religious person. It's now more about saying 'goodbye' - and good send off. Isn't it a bit like everyday life now, wear what you feel comfortable in, who's to judge. I don't think anyone would have been thinking you looked out of place.

friendlygingercat Fri 24-Apr-26 16:40:30

No one nowadays can afford to waste money by buying black specially for a funeral so people wear what they have. While most people choose to wear subdued colours to a formal funeral its considered completely acceptable to go in "office" or business wear Bear in mine that people may well have t go on to work or have come straight from work.