My daughter died ten days ago

Garage have not been able to come for the car - but apparently my clutch is giving up....I knew it was going, but it was reasonable until I came back from Oxford. Not worth fixing. The garage are on the track of a Golf for sale.....

Can't think about the SODC letter now. Hope M will help.

Could have been worse POGS - I was up early and watered the garden...

I have been trying to get back to what I was involved with with the SODC about the fire next door, and to write a letter to the new Labour councillor.
( www.gransnet.com/forums/aibu/a1215636-New-update-on-my-reclusive-neighbours )
But reading about the fire and what happened after I'm finding very upsetting....I just had to drop any complaint when Jayne died.

I am still in the same situation as regards next door, no one is telling me anything, as I was looking up the councillor I realised there were three people at their gate obviously discussing something about the house - I came down from the loo and they had gone.

I hear no sounds, don't know if the man is back from hospital, and had begun worrying that the bins, tipped over in the front, had not been moved at all recently.....I need someone to push for me, as the EH Dept aren't.

Friend M should be back today. She has kept in touch by phone and email

May I wish you a reasonably good night Alie.

Life is all up and down anyway....
.......I really need to replace the car but haven't even thought about it!
The garage will pick it up tomorrow.

Yesterday I was miserable and today I have been coping, reasonable until I got very tired about teatime. Going to bed now,

That's all you needed, the blooming car going wrong. I am sorry you have this to deal with.

Glad you are feeling a little better in your health today*AllieOxon*.

Not too bad at the moment, reduced my sleeping stuff and feel clearer in the head and have more energy.
I will deal with my CAR first as it started running badly on the way back from Oxford with S......

sorry x posted there

Hope you can get through to Cruise by phone tomorrow Alie and explain just how tough things are for you

I just phoned the Child Death Line and sobbed on their shoulder for a while.... it helps......

To, not and!

Thought they might be available now, but no, it's 10 a.m. and 1.00 p.m. Monday to Friday....

Yes, maybe I should...thanks.

Would it help to talk on the phone to someone at Cruse, rather than travel to an appointment? Maybe you could ask them about that?

Whoever composed that letter doesn't seem too hot on communication skills, especially considering they are writing to bereaved people who have asked for help.

Oh, that's very unfair if that's the reason! There must be many people who can't get out and about, let alone drive to appointments...

Yes anno I think I did! All those asking are vulnerable....

Ana, no. However, I did ask them to come to me - I can't do any more driving than I am to Oxford........may be a problem.

They could do with some lessons in communication skills, because a vulnerable person, such as you are, Alie, could be quite hurt and take their tone as dismissive. I don't think that's the intention, but they could make it clearer.

I wonder why they're asking you to increase your availability? Did you say you'd only be available at certain times, Alie?

I think the bit about letting them know if you no longer require support is standard.

I suppose that at least they have been in touch to say they have not forgotten you. Bereavement counseling is an area that needs proper training and I can understand that recruitment and training is going to take time. Might it be possible to talk to your GP to see if there is any counseling available on the NHS in your area? Some GPs have attached counselors. I hope that you manage to find some help soon.

I don't know what to do about this. I'd just about given up on them.

It looks like they are having a recruitment drive, according to their website.

Starts off saying 'sorry you have had to wait so long....we have not forgotten about you...'
....'might help if you were to increase your availability'

In last two paragraphs
'If you no longer require bereavement support, could you let us know?'
'Number to call...you can leave a message...This will help us to manage our waiting list and we would appreciate this very much'

'Warm wishes' - but a general impression of being over loaded!

What exactly did the letter say, Alie? It does seem a bit very heartless to try to clear the waiting list in that way.

That's a bit tough Alie

Don't forget you can ring TCF and speak to someone.

Oh dear - that dos not sound very good.