Peri-menopause anyone?

Oh poor you Rubylady I can completely sympathise with you.

I have been peri-menopausal for a couple of years now. I am 54. Unbearable night sweats and irritating day time "flushes". My periods are all over the place and did seem to be reducing but the last few months have been horrendous. Very heavy bleeding and awful cramps too. My mood is very low (although I haven't had a great deal to smile about lately) and I feel like I am permanently under a black cloud.

That sounds awful. ? I took Menopace every day from about age 52 and so my symptoms were mild. I did have the very heavy periods so eventually told the GP, who did a blood test and it turned out to be a severely underractive thyroid, so don't just assume all your symptoms are menopausal!

Not everyone gets the menopause in physical terms. My periods stopped at 49 and that was it, just like my mother.

The only thing that happened to me was I changed in personality and stopped taking shit from anyone. Maybe I was going a bit crazy I don't know, but I parted friends with a lot of people who drove me mad anyway.

No hot flushes, no night sweats no headaches nothing. It made me feel like I was missing out !

I think we didn't have peri- menopause in my day. At least it wasn't given a name.
But I did have the most appalling periods. I had to wear ' rubber' knickers at one point. Then it was discovered I had fibroids. I had a hysterectomy aged 36, and never looked back. Sailed through the menopause courtesy of HRT.
My daughter is just beginning to have difficult periods and headaches. She is just 50 and won't contemplate HRT yet

Rubylady, I remember a pal from where I used to live who had very similar symptoms to yours. She had a hyst'my in the end and was hugely relieved afterwards! I think it was fibroids. In the end it will pass, but it's probably not much comfort to you now.

You don't sound anywhere NEAR supported enough at home! That's especially tough.

Many commis'ns.

Best wishes,
Mrs S.A.B-L
(Mrs Sleepless, Achy Boilinghot-Lady!)

I've got fibroids. They caused heavy periods and I passed rather large lumps of liverish matter. Rather than have a hysterectomy I opted for the mirena coil which did the trick - this is before my periods stopped completely. The coil is still in place and should probably have come out ages ago, but I fear if they remove it my insides might follow through !

I had really heavy bleeding from late 30s and homeopath gave me stuff to stop me going into the menopause. Started getting gaps in periods and putting on a LOT of weight at 45.

Went for months without a period and then one would crop up again - to the extent that when I eventually finished I didn't know I had.

Didn't have daytime flushes (thank goodness) but was lathered at 4 am every morning. Body clock got totally out of sync and it still is 20+ years later - timer goes off about 7 pm and I get really cold, comes on again at 4 am and then I'm roasting - a small price to pay for no more periods! I always had very heavy/painful periods so I'm very grateful that my menopause has been relatively easy.

Have had HRT at various times to try and sort what GP has considered problems but haven't found it useful.

Just read the bits about the clots. I got clots as a teenager - as I said, really heavy periods. My Mamma (Grandmother) just said that she'd had clots - that was it - I coped. Circa 1960 you just did.

oh, rubylady, i hope you're feeling better today and that the bleeding has slowed down. i was really angry when i read that your son was absolutely no help at all - no wonder you're [not]counting the days until he leaves.

i hope you're able to see your doctor soon - things like this need checking and i'd hate anyone to have to go through what i went through.

my menopause was a "forced" one as i had a total hysterectomy owing to ovarian cancer but i went overnight from a lady having periods to full blown menopause - not nice. i was only 47 at the time.

however i went on to hrt which sorted the hot flushes out and made me feel so much better. i started on patches but i'm allergic to them so i then had a six monthly implant until they stopped making it. when this happened i went on to pills - and i'm still on them and intend staying on them until the doctor refuses to renew my prescription!!

it seems that the menopause is not talked about much - bit like periods when we were younger. i didn't enjoy my abbreviated one but i wish it was easier on us ladies - maybe i'll come back as a man next time or a cat ............ haven't decided which yet.

Hi Ruby lady I am in a very similar position, night time needing tampons, sanitary towel and still waking up in a mess, i finally took the bull by the horns and went to see my GP to ask for a Mirena coil as I did some research and thought it might help, she agreed but first wanted to send me for a pelvic scan to check that there weren't any other issues (I thought I might have fibroids) however that was all clear, and obviously the stupidly heavy and irregular bleeding is just down to the peri menopause, I am currently waiting for my appointment for the coil fitting and will let you know how I get on, in the meantime she has prescribed me Norethisterone tablets to stop bleeding while I am on holiday, other than the heavy bleeding I get hot flushes, extreme tiredness headaches and lightheadedness, but fortunately no depression, the GP also told me that the chemicals in the Mirena coil might well also help with some of these symptoms, who knows, but I am looking forward to being finished with all this eventually. oh I am 56 by the way. I hope that you soon get some help x

Dear Rubylady,

You poor thing.

I have been going through the peri - menopause now for 11 years . I started early at 40 with a bad peri menopause, really severe symptoms. However there is a lot that can be done to help.

I feel a sudden loss of blood needs your gp to check you esp. if you are breathless or getting a fast heart beat. Acute blood loss is different to blood loss over a period of months i.e heavy periods with clots and flooding which causes anaemia.

You may wish to research the following
.hysteroscopy, HRT,
natural remedies,
Mirena coil, many women have been fitted with this for very heavy painful periods around peri menopause time etc.
i recommend looking at a company well springs as they have lots of info on menopause,
further investigations by your gp , ultra sound scans external and internal and a referral to a gynaecologist who specializes in the menopause.

I also recommend looking up Wellsprings which deal in biodentical hormones.

You can use gaviscon for reflux which can be used for indigestion type symptoms which the menopause can create.
Eye drops for the dry eyes it creates and anti depressants which help some women more than hrt does with low mood.

Dosulepine an anti depressant in a low dose can be used for hot flushes to great effect and can help with irritable bladder. but all this needs to be discussed with an up to date G.P. or Gynaecologist.

Also Yes or Replens can be a brilliant moisturizing aid if suffering from female. dryness. On px. or Holland and barratt do the Yes.

Do not suffer in silence.

Good Luck and hope this helps you and others

Also wished to say many people make the " Menopause Cake" there are recipes on line and this helped many through this challenging time of change.

There are also some good u tube lectures by eminent Gynaecologists who do explain it very well.

You can feel like you are going mad at times says one of them.. which I can say I have felt at times...rather like a moody teenage girl whose hormones are going into overdrive etc.

I found that taking the anti histamine Piriton at night helped with my poor sleep and the hot flushes. My understanding is that the hot flushes are caused by a sudden release of Histamine in the body but what triggers this I am not sure, maybe the imbalance of hormones and rapid swings in the progesterone and oestrogen that happens affects areas in the brain that start to release other chemicals etc.

The body will always try to balance itself which is what good health feels like , in balance and we can assist this with diets , exercise, relaxation...yoga and tai chi can help a lot to rebalance all the hormones and never forget the body is connected by a lot of different chemical processes which we are not aware of and the whole will always be affected by its parts.

A holistic approach to health is usually a good way to go,, western medicine and alternative medicine in combination may be helpful.

Tibetan medicine can be very gentle but powerful in treating womens health problems.

Cool flannels and fans can help at night and cool packs.

Hope this helps

I had a total hysterectomy in 1996 aged 44. I was out straight on HRT and have been after having dreadful periods all my life, it 19yrs until last year when I needed a knee replacement and had to stop taking it before surgery. It's now 14 mths without it ( as I'm waiting for more surgery) and I'm still getting hot flushes evsry day and have a permanent night sweat every night !!!! I've found that HRT has just delayed the inevitable which is now claiming me with a vengeance!!, ID love to go back on it but know if Dr takes me off it which is inevitable in the end I will go through all this all over again

I agree with lizzypopbottle see a doctor, I had Fibroids and Endometriosis and had a terrible time with heavy periods and anemia. Eventually I had a hysterectomy and now I feel wonderful. No pain no blood no anemia. I do take a little pill called Tibolone to help with hot flushes and sleeplessness. My moods are now constant, no ups and downs. Life is good. My mother had a much better time, so we can't always go by our mothers.

Gosh, some of you have had a terrible time. i count my blessings. Had an anaemic time towards the end of my period life as they became really heavy then stopped - luckily as the mood swings were becoming noticable. No flushes but 2 years after they stopped i now have 'vaginal atrophy ' yay! thankfully my gynae is very sympathic and the cream should kick in soon. I think any problem should be seen by the GP, why suffer when you dont have to. My nickname should be hypochondriac possibly!

I'm approaching my 70th birthday in a few weeks time and I'm still having hot flushes/night and day sweats!! I took HRT when I was going through the menopause and stopped them several years ago on medical advice. Seems as if the symptoms have come back with a vengeance! My GP has prescribed anti-depressants which have helped with the sweats, though not got rid of them completely and I'm certainly feeling a nicer person because of them! The alternative was HRT, but I really couldn't face the thought of having a bleed every month, so said I'd try the anti-depressants to see if the worked.
Best to go and chat to a doctor if you're worried about anything though. I'd never have believed Anti-depressants could help with hot flushes and sweating!!

I had a hysterectomy when I was 38 for fibroids and massive bleeding . The Mirena hadn't been invented then ! It was the best thing I ever did .The bleeding was completely uncontrollable and I remember having 3 out of four weeks where I couldn't go anywhere without extra supplies of tampons, pads and knickers stashed in my bag and some days I just couldn't go out ..The menopause symptoms started when I was around 45 , obviously no heavy bleeding ,but the sweats ! Day and night all the time .I used to arrive at work looking as if I had just stepped out of the shower fully clothed ! I found the following really helpful :
.Ditch the duvet and go back to cotton sheets and cotton blankets . You can fling them on and off all night. Ditto for layers of cotton clothes . Keep well hydrated with cool water. Avoid booze.?. Coffee and tea made it worse too.
I did take HRT for about 5 years but as others have said it is just delaying the inevitable .I found red clover and black kohash good once I stopped HRT and I increased my soya intake a lot. But it was awful for a good couple of years. Now at the other end at 66 years I now have vaginal atrophy ,dry itchy skin and thinning hair , but at least I still have my own (heavily filled )teeth !

Thanks to everyone for your comments and support once again. I do feel I have done nothing but come on here this year to get help with one problem or another. I was sitting on the toilet yesterday, crying and shouting out when is it all going to stop? I was on my own at the time.

I've took the tablets given to me but the flow has not stopped a great deal and the clots are still coming away. The doctor did say it would take a couple of days for them to work properly though. I've hardly slept so feel shattered. Son still being an arse. He has booked his accommodation at University for 40 weeks so that he could have come home in the summer next year. I phoned the uni today and asked them if he could stay for the summer and he can, so he can do this instead. I can't live like this anymore, with someone there but not, if you know what I mean. I'm better alone really. Besides, with my health problems, I might need to move into a flat or bungalow to avoid the stairs in the future so I cannot really guarantee his room to be available all year. I might have to pay bedroom tax again until I move, but I'll deal with that.

I'm so glad my doggie is here. She has given me lots of cuddles today. I have also had support from the chemist who flew out some giant pads for me , have been texting a good friend for support, and have just remembered not to take my asprin tablet when it is sat in a glass waiting. It is amazing who is there for you when the chips are down compared to who should be there for you. My neighbour turning back yesterday from going to the seaside just to take care of me really was so kind of her, especially since we haven't even shared a cup of coffee yet! What a performance, seeing me, in my nightie, bare legs, bum probably hanging out, sat on the toilet, not being able to move and up to then all we had done was exchange pleasantries! Oh well, we're best mates now! And she brought me her DGD's nappy to use! The shame.

I am going seeing the doctor on Saturday (I know, they are doing weekend surgeries now), so will discuss all the things mentioned above then. I will write a list, thank you all.

Will this happen again?

I do wish that it was discussed more, either in schools or in life because I have had no idea apart from on here or the internet what would happen. I was going to go through the menopause, I haven't used the Pythagorus theorum ever! Or needed to recite Shakespeare. All very lovely, but life lessons would certainly help.

The doctor asked when my mum had gone through hers but, as she was an alcoholic and was unstable most days, I have no idea.

I was also asked if I could be pregnant! Not unless an angel has appeared at my window in the last month, no. I have not laid hands on a man for the last 10 years so that would have been a miracle but I know he had to check.

I hope I can get some sleep and that it starts to ease a bit. It's awful that we have to go through this step in life so messily, what with the other symptoms some of you have said. I wish all of you well, take care of yourselves, thanks again. lots of love. Xxx

Rubylady please take care of yourself, I so hope the doctors can give more help. I hate this menopause but count myself lucky now, I haven't had the bleeding problems as I had a hysterectomy

ruby I can't recommend enough the mirena coil.
It was a life savior for me.
Without it I would at times have been house bound due to severe bleeding and clots.
Itchy legs drove me mad (still do). So I use piriton at night which also helps with my on going sleep problems.
Barrier cream also helps with the shower drying out my skin.

Thanks girls, I appreciate it. I will ask the doctor about the coil. I really don't want this to happen again, it's awful. I need to sleep but feel I'm going to make a mess even though I have got huge pads. I might set my alarm just for a couple of hours and then get up and change and try again. I'm so glad of people on here, I would feel so alone without your help. You all get me through. Xxx

Ruby, that sounds terrifying! Hearty congrats on dealing with it reasonably calmly - your head must have been spinning!

Very interesting posts about the Mirena. I'm on chemical HRT and have no intention of coming off it ever, but I'll do a bit of research on the Mirena coil in menopause and see whether it's worth hassling my doctor.

Menopause is one of the last big secrets, isn't it?! Even our mums & aunties glossed over it - hardly surprising that its many disturbing symptoms can be so confusing, as nobody told us! I do tend to think that, if men had a menopause, there'd be widespread knowledge and a whole lot more sympathy

I second chasing the medics for more info, Ruby, particularly if anything so dramatic happens again. Women are often told "It's your age" quite dismissively, and it can take some belligerence persistence to be taken seriously.

Hope the iron supports a rapid return to feeling healthy.

When I started the menopause I got myself down to the surgery and on the HRT. The risks are there but are not huge and recent news articles have stressed that you can live quite safely on it for years. You need to inform yourself of the benefits and the risks and decide for yourself.

The benefits are: instant cessation of flushes, bleeds and other symptoms, weight and figure control, hair in reasonable condition (albeit greying), no 'ups and downs' in mood, generally excellent health. I have never felt healthier or happier. When I did my fifty year health check I came out top for everything and when I did the recent new NHS health check I got 10/10. I do eat sensibly, exercise and eschew smoking and excessive drinking, however.

Apparently, when you have been on the normal HRT dose for a while you can have a step-down dose for longer.

The bleeding has stopped, but if there was blood still to come away, where does it go if it just stops? Sorry for being gory but I wanted to know. I do have bad period pains and lower back ache. I feel weak and exhausted.

I'm also on your biopsy thread, ruby. I'm sorry, you must be feeling truly grim. One potential problem ruled out; a few more to go!

I don't think you'd be retaining blood - it can happen, but is very unusual. Now you're in expert hands, anything weird will be picked up. Cramps suggest you may be in for more bleeding (oh, joy.) When's your next scan/inspection?

I have PCOS and have been putting on a good impression of a WW1 battlefield every six weeks or so for most of my life. Mefanamic/tranexamic acid did help somewhat, but never got me anywhere near 'normal'. I'm not technically through the menopause yet (my mum's lasted 12 years!) and, despite HRT, still have occasional hormone surges with associated flooding. Once or twice a year, though, rather than half my soddin' life.

Iron & folate replacement are very important due to the blood loss. You could also try a B supplement that provides choline, inositol and biotin in large quantities - most supplements will also fulfil your requirements for folate & the other B vits. Inositol and biotin can act as hormone regulators in certain conditions, and you need the choline to balance it. Biotin's good for skin, hair and possibly* for cell strength in general.

Have and for your iron! Oh, and why not?

*I'm not a fan of non-medical health advice, so 'possibly' means I'd discount that part ... but it won't harm you. Excess B vitamins are excreted