Depression In Retirement

PageTurner - I would love to hear more about FutureLearn.com. How does it work and what did you study?

Have you thought about taking on a Trustee post? There are lots of charitable groups out there desperate for people with experience and skills that you have to help with their work. Posts are usually unpaid but expenses with travel etc are usually refunded. jobs.theguardian.com/landingpage/3000004/charity-trustee-html/ I have just become a Trustee for a local charity and it is very interesting!

My first port of call would be the doctors as you mention depression and lack of energy.
it is so easy to stay indoors and let life pass you by whilst being in this lethargic state.
You are already doing some activities, so take on more.
Consider doing exercise ,yoga, pilates classes locally, and perhaps progress to a gym where they do classes to suit.
Everybody isn't fit who go there.
They attain to get fitter and it can be a social gathering for some.
Aqua aerobics or a rambling club are other ideas.
Even if you have never exercised it is not too late to try.
Don't knock it until you have tried it.
Only you can pull yourself through this.

ContraryMary88 I cant follow your contribution.
Where does DH and son come into it.
There is no mention on the OP.

* holdingontometeeth* the OP has another thread ‘Sister Issues’ the reference to the son was an error which I apologised for just after posting

Have a look on the internet at U3A in your area.

Have you considered taking on some exam marking? I'm a retired teacher and I do a lot of marking, so I'm busy in June and July, and also November. It keeps my brain working, I enjoy the meetings and the money is nice to spend on treats. I did this before I retired and I'm so glad I've kept it going. I know there are shortages of examiners in some subjects, and I've turned down several offers of work because I've already taken on several contracts.

Possibly the work kept other things at bay. Now you have the time to feel your feelings and it can be challenging.

Sometimes running around joining various things is no the answer. It takes time.

Go back to work but on your terms.Sign up to an agency and do a couple of days a week. Some people are just not meant to retire and they need the structure and the purpose in their life, but to a lesser degree. I had a management job in care but returned as a care assistant after two years of retirement.I just do 2 shifts a week and i love i and i have been told it shows in the way i am with the people i care for. I do a good job, feel valued as a person, but i dont worry about it once i have left the building and the extra cash is handy.Give it a try it may be just what you need.

I had to retire at 62 after a mild stroke. we had two dogs that died within the year also . we said that we would never have another dog but I need to get one for company, while my wife was at work. The new dog was a rescue dog an alsation/rough collie cross 3 yrs old he was lovely only thing was as the others were getting on they were generally quiet. he wasn't. He would bark at anyone shutting a car door at the other end of the street. after about 3 week the neighbour came round and complained. This through me over the edge and sent me in to a depression. I was coming around to being partially sighted. But with her saying she was going to report him to the council was the last straw. I phoned the council and was told as he would be classed by them as being classed as an assistance dog to a disabled person they would not take any notice. I am now struggling to cope with me wife's down would slope getting steeper with Dementia.

Gabriella you did make me laugh, how I would love to go skiing, riding etc, unfortunately the U3A, National Trust etc have to fill the gap and no I don't feel old just a bit worn round the edges!

Suesocks I know exactly how you feel. I've been semi-retired for the last 3 years. I like temporary placements, working a few months then taking a few months off, but my last 4 week placement lasted 18 months and only ended when Carillion collapsed in February so I took the last 6 months off. I find I then have the motivation to get house/garden projects done. When I found myself getting demotivated, bored with house work and not wanting to get going in the mornings I start to look for work again. I went to the temp agency last week and I start a new 3 month placement tomorrow and I'm 66, so there is temp work out there if you want it.

Suesocks I really understand. I worked full time for many years. Then went to 30 hours. At that time I couldn't wait to
retire! I did take voluntary redundancy last April, and don't need to work anymore. But within 2 months had started working again. I live on my own, and even though I tried to fill my day, joining things, spending time with family and friends, I still felt lonely. My best friend died 7 years ago, and I think if she was around it may have been different. I am currently working 22 hours per week, which at the moment is a good mix . Next year I may want less hours, but the 22 hours is fine right now.
May be look for a little job. Doesn't have to be what you used to do.I know you said your not one for groups, but if its the 'right' group you may enjoy it.
I'm hoping that when I do eventually retire I will be ready and enjoy it.
It's been a learning curve for me to have a real 'plan' when the time comes.

Sue. Can I tell you about something which is most helpful for a low mood..St John's Wort. The high strength version from Boots is the best one. It works in hours and once you are out of your 'dumps', then you will feel more interested in pursuing a new activity. Like helping others or a new qualification or an adventurous holiday. My saviour is the dog that I rescued..he is wonderful company and a good reason to get going in the morning!

St John's Wort should not be taken unless you have checked that it will not interact adversely with any other medications you might be taking.

Spot on Luckygirl

Most of my suggestions have already been made. All I can add is it took me about 18 months to adjust and initially I had to make a concerted effort to do things but it did ‘come together’. Don’t leap into committing to doing things until you know it’s what you want to do - lots of taster sessions. Good luck

You have my total sympathy SueSocks and I've come to realise its a very common phenomenon. I took planned early retirement from a career that I loved, looked forward to all the things I would now have time for...... and completely fell apart. I have no suggestions for what might help you as an individual but want you to know that it will get better, like all life's major transitions. Give yourself time and you WILL find your way forward.

Don't beat yourself up about this. It's quite understandable. I would plan to do a couple of things and write them in my diary. Also write a list of things you would possibly like to do, and start to research them. What about volunteering your skills abroad? You have so much to offer.

In preparation for retirement, I did start a post-grad degree, which was good on all sorts of levels, but I did find it very hard work after a couple of years p-t, deferred and never went back. Perhaps another undergrad degree would have been a better choice.

GabriellaG made me laugh too.
Skiing etc sounds fun as does trampolining but 2 minutes on my grandsons trampoline and I have to be helped off lol. People volunteer, join NT, crochet class, U3A etc because perhaps they now have time to. And also they are manageable activities. Sorry GabriellaG its what getting older is like for most people. If you need a purpose there are plenty of opportunities. I suggest Suesocks starts exploring. We've got to make the most of this time. I didn't want to think of retirement as the end years so we bought a mobile home in a lovely area near mountains and sea. Not for everyone but its given us a new beginning- looking forward to summer days in our little holiday home.

Hi Sue.
I retired early, and was climbing the walls within 6 months.
I heartily recommend taking a part-time job in an entirely different sector. I have learned so much, mostly love what I do...and only rarely hit a stress point when I wonder 'why am I doing this!'.

Work slave to zero is too much of a system shock in my opinion. Particularly if you live alone.

Did anyone mention allotments? Usually a pleasant supportive sociable group... and vegetables. Even if you can't get one immediately, get name down on list - can always pass later on.