Black Dog Gang 7

That’s nice annie another baby.?
I am so hot I cannot do a thing, I don’t cope well with heat and this weather is really draining.
Spoke to my son tonight. He is still looking for work. Hold him in your prayers please and my DGS who is up and down again. Family worries, always something.
lavender hope your daughter is better soon.
Sleep well everyone.x

Good news Annie, new babies are always uplifting news.

We all have a basic need to keep calm, stay cool and safe, and keep talking.

A short walk is my panacea to a black dog day. The exercise tires your body and if you look at everything you see along the way as if it’s the first time you’ve ever seen it, you won’t let the fears take over.
The plus side of the exercise is hopefully, a better night’s sleep.
I’ll have a walk early evening as the day cools down.

Congratulations Annie, some good news is away lovey.

Must be catching I had a night mare, jumped up heart broken, horrible when you only remember half of it..
hope every one is plodding nicely today..

Oh Puzzler what a brave day you had - so glad you enjoyed it. It’s a good day when the”old “ you surfaces isn,t it. Hope you have many more. Bluesky I too used to worry about losing my Mum when I was little maybe that’s when the anxiety creeps in. She developed Bi polar late in life unfortunately so I understand about the midnight phone calls. She was lovely though funny and clever and my children loved her to bits.
Have you ever sat and watched people in a cafe and thought they all look so carefree and felt a bit envious but we all have problems and it’s easy to get wrapped up in your own . Hope you,re managing to find a cool spot today and haven,t actually melted!! Stay safe

I expect you have tried the nighttime tea blends , lavender pillow sprays, taking several slow, deep breaths before you settle to sleep,
which for some give a longer night of restful sleep?

Hi all x

Heard this morning I am now a great aunt x 14 ,

Dreams, a bad dream would wake us, be it fearful, distressing.
A pleasant dream ? no danger , no alarm bells , we are relaxed .

Evoha, hello, it’s great that hypnotherapy helped you , thank you for sharing it.

Doodle I doubt very much that anyone has a carefree life

Puzzler I never thought of this thread as therapy, for me it’s
for anyone who needs to reach out and not have to experience
the total isolation I experienced many years ago, it caused me
to work with Sams and a national help line for anxiety.

Puzzler I take a sleeping pill on alternate nights and am not aware that I dream. On the other nights it takes me a long time to get to sleep and I keep waking up, often it is during a very bad dream but not always. I never wake during a good dream so don't know if I have them. I think we only remember dreams that we wake during.

Hello all - I empathise with you all - I have suffered from anxiety and depression all of my life - I’ve tried so many ‘treatments’ and the only one which worked/had a lasting positive effect was hypnotherapy - I’ve no idea why but I am so grateful that it’s curbed my anxiety and obsessive catastrophisation - I wish you all well.

nonnie I hadn’t seen your post when I wrote mine but yes that is exactly true. Perhaps that’s another thing we can add to our gang dictionary, wobbles, plodding and mind midges ?

Do you always have bad dreams Nonnie?
Do you know why? Is it a side effect of any medication you’re on?
I ask as I can go weeks without having a dream that I can recall.

bluesky I too spent many years thinking I was the only one who worried about things and that others seem to have a live without cares. I now know that many people who seem to have carefree lives also have troubles. They just hide them better or don’t talk about it. This freedom to talk about mental health issues is good. There is nothing to be ashamed about and sharing with others can help us all.

I'd like to share this from today's daily reading:

Anyone who has lived or holidayed in the West and Highlands of Scotland will understand the misery of the Egyptian people as the plague of gnats descended. One word says it all: MIDGES.

These blood-sucking cousins of gnats have ruined endless peaceful summer evenings in the garden, on picnics, camping, fishing or walking. They never arrive singly, but in battalions. No amount of flailing arms and slaps will keep them all from their banquet on exposed areas of flesh.

Away from the territories inhabited by the insects, we have metaphorical gnats and midges of our own. They are the worries and fears that get into our heads and multiply, swarming day and night until they bring us low, though too often reluctant to share our state of mind or seek help.

This is especially true at the time of writing (April) during the Covid-19 lockdown. Many are enduring “mind midges”. Dread of disease, loneliness, separation from those we love, burning anger when we feel others are behaving irresponsibly, bereavement without the release of full funerals - all play their part in causing us mental distress. Even the strongest have bad days.

Doodle I do the same, ignore what might be a health issue for me and assume it will go away but then I get neurotic about even the smallest thing with the family and they don't even have a bad health history.

Yes, I keep telling myself about the good things but it doesn't stop the anxiety which still pushes through.

Maggie I understand that, I get this feeling of impending doom without anything specific in mind.

Lavender think I must have been away when you said about your daughter but, from what I read today, it sounds very difficult. I will add her to my prayer list.

Puzzler those are the best friends, the ones you can see after a big gap and talk as if you only met yesterday. Heartening message for us all.

I feel like the odd one out because I wake up at probably my most positive of the day and then things go downhill. I have to do what must be done in the mornings or it simply doesn't get done.

Does anyone know why we only wake up during bad dreams and never during good ones? Or is it that I only have bad dreams?

Morning all.
Puzzler I agree with you totally, the thread is one of my safe places to come. If you do are don’t want to talk we can still sit a while and read what friends on the black dog thread are up to..
Happy Tuesday all ?

Good morning gangsters,
Anniebach I’ve been thinking about therapies, and realising this thread is one we didn’t mention and should be top of the list as a remarkable place with access to all, at any time of the day, and it’s posters give heartfelt encouragement and reassurance to anyone who is feeling that “unset-jelly-in-tummy” feeling which pre-empts wobbly days for me. Or full blown fearful days.
(You might have other descriptions that apply to your feelings).
It’s always good to talk, and here is a very safe, warm place to talk. ?

lavender I can understand some of the stress you are coping
with, I have spoken of my darling daughter who had bi polar,
those telephone calls, when she was in hospital and at home, at least when she was in hospital she was safe, when she was home , on a high she didn’t think others were sleeping, on a low distressed and missing her children and husband, they would telephone me because she had telephoned them, the
police to say she was wandering. Your daughter is safe , but
I really do understand distressing telephone calls.

We are here for you my love x

Joyce it will pass, hold onto this, you went to Disney World
and said hello to Donald Duck for me, you made all those bags , you have relaxed in the garden, you will move forward again x
Maggie no, doesn’t sound bonkers, panic attacks are so cruel,
they are hell on earth but they don’t cause physical harm,
we are coping with the unknown with the virus, fear is in the air isn’t it, if I may ask? how do you spend your day? I too live
alone, there is no one to distract us is there .keep talking here ,
we care for each other x

puzzler yes we want you posting we are here for each other,
To share, listen, understand, share bad days and good days , you certainly had a good day, you give hope to all x

Doodle you have much worry this causes stress and stress causes us anxiety.

I will share a few things a say to myself,

Cancel that thought. Change the thought to change the feeling. This too will pass. Be still and know that I am God.

Hugs to x

I can identify with so many of you, same fears, and yet we feel we are the only ones, we think others have nice carefree lives and behave rationally, but maybe they don't! Thinking about it yes Doodle like you I did start by worrying about losing my mum when I was a child. My latest is thinking that eventually either myself or DH will go first and the other will be left alone, which is what sadly happens. I just tell myself that either of us will have to cope like everybody else. Hope you all have a good night x

bluesky when I was young I used to worry constantly about my mum and dad leaving me (dying) as they were much older than my friends parents. Then I got married and started worrying about my own children then my grandchildren.
maggie I am not the best person to ask about mindfulness as I don’t practice it enough. I bought an app called Calm which was actually useful to listen too. I believe you can find something similar on NHS websites.
What I actually found out about mindfulness and counselling is that you have to put in some effort yourself. There is no miracle cure you have to try and help yourself by doing theses things.
scardeycat several of the things I worry about have happened (and many that I worry about haven’t). What I have found is that when these things happen, they pass. Maybe not instantly, sometimes the worrying goes on for a while. But they do pass. I try to tell myself every time that I’ve been here before and sometimes it helps.
maggie try setting your alarm for a sensible time and if you wake up before then don’t think. Don’t let worries enter your mind. If you are religious, just say God take care of my family and leave it at that. Once you start thinking you are lost. You won’t gain anything by worrying in the early hours. There is plenty of time during the day to worry so just try and sleep.
lavender I’m sorry to hear your daughter is distressed again.
Does the lockdown affect her ability to see people or to get out? I hope they can adjust her medication to ease her anxiety.
puzzler it is so nice to have some good news of someone who is doing well. Glad you had a good time. I am a very nervous driver and hate going anywhere new. I get very het up so I understand your nervousness. Well done. ?
joce and maggie you obviously have similar concerns. Has something happened recently that have brought your health worries to the fore or is it the virus?

Evening all, Maggie wonder if that’s what it is fear of death. My health anxiety is like Maggie always cancer, I had breast cancer 15 years ago, one of my biggest fears I thought, but dealt with it well I think. My problem started before that a few years before.. wish I could work it out maybe than I would find some answers. Maggie I’m 65 i do sometimes feel very ashamed of my self.. The dreaded morning feeling is the worst for me, I lay there from about 4 o’clock but cannot get out of bed till 9, I don’t know why I can’t I do try so hard, but no it’s got be 9 o’clock..

Lavenderzen no wonder your stomach is churning, what a shocker of a time you are having. I suspect your stomach will settle when your DD turns a corner and you hear better news about her state of mind from the hospital.
I hope it’s sooner than you think ?

Hello everyone. If you’re sure you want me to keep posting I’ll tell you what I achieved today.
I visited a dear friend (of 45 years) in a town 35 miles away, driving alone.

I have visited her only once since she so lived in this town as I have been scared to drive somewhere I’m not used to, alone.
(For all the “what ifferies” tricks our mind plays with us).
I would make excuses and not fix a date. She was patient and understanding.

I’ve known I was going today for 4 weeks, but have refused to give it a minute’s thought in my head until yesterday when I set up my sat. nav. (new car last week) for destination: friend’s address).
I got showered and dressed in my prettiest outfit this morning, necklace, bracelet, perfume to make me feel confident. Off I went.
She knows of my difficulties and I don’t know who was more delighted, her or me, when I arrived on time. We had a lovely 4 hours, I wasn’t worrying about getting home. We had a leisurely lunch (I ate every morsel) and caught up with lots of interesting chat and I absolutely concentrated on what she was saying 100%.
This is the me of 5 years ago, but most certainly not the person anxiety and depression turned me into 3 years ago.

I feel so proud that I did it - and truly enjoyed it.
It would be very blasé if I said “If I can do this, you can”. I am not so stupid as to even think that.
But everything is possible - if you reach out for it - out of your comfort zone.

TOYA ?‍♂️

Hello everyone

Annie how are you, I hope those flash floods are not near you. I have just seen the news xx

Glad to see everyone coming on here to talk. It does help. I have had a stressful day with my daughter. Well, really it has been going on for about 10 days now. I did ring the hospital where she is and spoke to the person in charge. She is ringing at all hours of the day and night - it is so very difficult when there is no reasoning with her. Anyway the nurse in charge said she has been very troubled, the lock down reintroduction has been the beginning of it all again, and they are looking into the medication. There is no end to it really.
Anyway I am trying to keep it together, if only for my granddaughter.
My stomach has been dreadful all day, I have just taken some Slipper Elm, that may settle things down.

Hope all you lovely people are doing ok, Doodle Joyce Scardeycat BlueSky Nonnie and all the other people I have missed out.
Have a peaceful evening, take care and stay safe and love to all xx

Ooh that early morning waking! I think fondly of the time my alarm would wake me at a sensible hour....

Reading your posts make me feel less alone as I think anxiety is quite a lonely business as it’s invisible! Health anxiety and worry about family safety are the things that wake me up early - yes Bluesky it’s the dreaded what if,s . Reading your lovely friendly messages to one another is better than any counselling . Hope you have a good evening Everyone - keep cool!!!!!

How are you all this evening? Annie, thanks for your understanding. Feeling terrified today, not sure what of, just don’t feel safe. Sounds bonkers coming from a nearly 63 year old woman! Maybe it’s a fear of death and I need to try and address that.

I hope you’re all safe and sound and not melting in the heat. Doodle, do you have any tips on your mindfulness practice?