Gransnet forums


Is this attitude common?

(129 Posts)
Juno56 Fri 11-Sep-20 11:44:56

I don't post much (more of
a lurker😀) but I had to ask for opinions because I am quite perturbed.
I had coffee this week with a good friend whom I would have said I knew well. The conversation got around to the "joys" of getting older and "you know you're getting on a bit when....". I said: "when the bowel cancer test kit comes through the box a few days after your 60th birthday 😕". I was amazed when my friend said that she had never returned her test. Not only that, she had never responded to a breast cancer test invitation and had only ever had one cervical smear test because she found it all too embarrassing and distasteful! She changed the subject, we finished our coffee and parted soon after but it set me thinking, is this attitude common? I wondered what GNers thought.

Juliet27 Fri 11-Sep-20 11:48:46

I take up any of the 'offers' we're fortunate to be given.

Jaxjacky Fri 11-Sep-20 11:51:26

I’m with Juliet27 all offers accepted with the ‘prévention is better than curé attitude.

Nannarose Fri 11-Sep-20 11:52:12

I think I would say 'It's not uncommon'.
I respect everyone's right to handle their own health as they wish (transmissable diseases apart!) but I think that personal contact from a trained nurse with time to discuss concerns, and offer support would help more people have screening.
As a Health Visitor I spent many hours talking about vaccination and screening with people who were doubtful and / or anxious. I always said that I supported any decision they made, and their right to change their mind. I would not be 'pushy' but I would address their concerns.
Sadly, as we have seen during this pandemic, that kind of support is not seen as a priority.

lovebeigecardigans1955 Fri 11-Sep-20 11:52:47

Sadly, I think it is probably fairly common. I've always responded to requests of this type as I think it's just the sensible thing to do, isn't it?

However, there'll always be those who don't listen and don't want to know - perhaps they're either scared of finding out or think they're invincible? After all, at these screenings there'll always be a certain percentage of 'no shows' won't there?

GrannyGravy13 Fri 11-Sep-20 11:54:20

I am happy to have any health checks offered.

Calendargirl Fri 11-Sep-20 11:55:22

I’m with Juliet. I think we are lucky to be offered preventative things for free.

Surprised some, including GN’ers, are not taking up the free flu jabs.

Noticed a couple of winters ago when there seemed to be a shortage of flu vaccine, the world and his wife were on social media and news bulletins, demanding their jabs. Probably some of them who now don’t bother.

Lucca Fri 11-Sep-20 12:00:31

Speaking as someone whose breast cancer would not have been detected were it not for a routine mammogram I find that attitude ridiculous!

Elegran Fri 11-Sep-20 12:15:57

If Juno's friend does develop cancer in her breast, cervix or bowel, she will soon discover just how much more "too embarrassing and distasteful" any of those are than a few minutes doing a test. Silly pseudo-sensitive woman - too concerned about being tasteful to take care of herself! I wonder if she finds it too distasteful to wash under her armpits or wipe her arse?

growstuff Fri 11-Sep-20 12:22:54

I have all the checks and vaccinations going.

Ilovecheese Fri 11-Sep-20 12:23:57

There seems to be a feeling among quite a lot of people that these parts of our bodies should be ignored as much as possible, and that will prevent diseases or infections.
So many of us have been brought up to be ashamed of any sort of "messy" bodily function.
Perhaps younger people will be more willing to take care of their health now that we are beginning to be a bit more open about our bodies.
There still seems to be quite a lot of resistance to discussing intimate parts of our bodies though, this was illustrated by some of the reactions to a TV programme about pubic hair.

Oopsadaisy4 Fri 11-Sep-20 12:24:28

I was pleased that the Bowel Cancer kit detected something, my GP said I had piles! If I had left it much later I would have had serious problems.

Ilovecheese Fri 11-Sep-20 12:30:22

It is a puzzling attitude among women who have given birth, don't you think? Surely we should have lost any inhibitions during pregnancy and childbirth.

MissAdventure Fri 11-Sep-20 12:32:58

I'm afraid I'm someone who puts these things off a lot.
I'm mostly really afraid of being "pulled around", even though I know it would be worse if something was wrong.

Dorsetcupcake61 Fri 11-Sep-20 12:37:07

I happily attend every test. I think prevention is better than cure and we are lucky to have a healthcare system where such tests are free. A couple of years ago my area piloted tests for bowel cancer for those in their 50s. I imagined it would involve a sample but in reality was a colonoscopy. On discovering this the age old advice of be careful what you volunteer came to mind🤣. It was fine,painless and the staff were lovely. It was reassuring to know all was well.

trustgone4sure Fri 11-Sep-20 12:38:39

As much as i don`t like the idea of being tested,i really don`t like the idea of being dead because i was stupid enough to not be tested.
Bring them on and live to see our childern/grandchildren/ friends grow up.

Elegran Fri 11-Sep-20 12:39:48

Look on it as taking steps to make sure that you don't develop something that would mean you were "pulled around" a lot more.

Actually, there isn't ANY pulling around involved with the bowel test kit, and it is a lot less "dirty" than changing a nappy!

MissAdventure Fri 11-Sep-20 12:40:17

The idea of that procedure absolutely terrifies me.
I really feel I couldn't bring myself to have it done.
It's not embarrassment, I'm worried about it hurting.

Elegran Fri 11-Sep-20 12:41:34

The colonoscopy? It doesn't hurt! You are worrying for nothing.

Juno56 Fri 11-Sep-20 12:44:38

Thank you all for your very speedy responses. I too take up any and all health screening available to me. We are so much more fortunate than earlier generations to have these tests available to us. Whilst respecting, to a certain extent, people's right to refuse these tests I just cannot understand why anyone would do so.
Elegran exactly! Whilst I still consider her my friend I can't deny that my opinion of her has gone down and just such thoughts were going through my mind.

BlueSky Fri 11-Sep-20 12:47:32

Agree Lovecheese I could understand a shy young girl (in our days really not so much now) but a grown woman who has had sex and gone through childbirth, I don't think there's much 'dignity' left!

Juno56 Fri 11-Sep-20 12:51:56

Ilovecheese my friend has never had children but from comments over the years she had (and probably still has) a full sex life.

Jane10 Fri 11-Sep-20 12:53:01

I dutifully accept all offers of screening. I have been taken aback though at some attitudes to the bowel screening. One person (an NHS employee) said it was disgusting and she wouldn't dream of doing it. Nothing I could say would persuade her. I've also met this attitude among men. Luckily not DH though.

nexus63 Fri 11-Sep-20 12:55:09

i had almost 2 years of what i thought was ibs, just put up with it, but started to be sick after eating anything, doctor wanted a blood test and my iron level was at 3..should have been about 60, went to hospital for scans and a colonoscopy, result bowel cancer...if i left it i had 6 months to live, i was 57 and never thought i had cancer. i will do the test if i get any but hospital will monitor me for 5 years, i would urge anyone to get tested

MissAdventure Fri 11-Sep-20 12:55:35

I'm not sure what a sex life has in common with a camera being inserted in your nether regions.