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Is this attitude common?

(130 Posts)
Juno56 Fri 11-Sep-20 11:44:56

I don't post much (more of
a lurker?) but I had to ask for opinions because I am quite perturbed.
I had coffee this week with a good friend whom I would have said I knew well. The conversation got around to the "joys" of getting older and "you know you're getting on a bit when....". I said: "when the bowel cancer test kit comes through the box a few days after your 60th birthday ?". I was amazed when my friend said that she had never returned her test. Not only that, she had never responded to a breast cancer test invitation and had only ever had one cervical smear test because she found it all too embarrassing and distasteful! She changed the subject, we finished our coffee and parted soon after but it set me thinking, is this attitude common? I wondered what GNers thought.

Jane10 Fri 11-Sep-20 12:57:23

The new bowel testing kit is much simpler than the old one. I still have to put my reading glasses on to see what to do though!

Pantglas2 Fri 11-Sep-20 12:57:33

“I wonder if she finds it too distasteful to wash under her armpits or wipe her arse?” Elegran’s comment made me laugh ?

I go for every test offered but my sister in law, a nurse, doesn’t! What’s that about?

NfkDumpling Fri 11-Sep-20 12:58:41

I'm all for prevention and catching things early rather than sticking my head in the sand and pretending all is well.

Although I'm not sure I'll want to know if ever something gets past the screening and I only have a short time left.

Sparklefizz Fri 11-Sep-20 13:04:12

My 2nd lot of breast cancer was only detected by a mammogram. I think we're extremely lucky to live in a country where these preventative tests and/or vaccinations are free, and I take up all of them.

tanith Fri 11-Sep-20 13:08:01

I’m sorry if this shocks anyone but needs must, my DH was of the bury his head in the sand type and sad to say he’s dead from cancer that if only he’d seen the doctor when he suspected something was wrong he’d still be here to enjoy our wonderful family. He wouldn’t do a bowel cancer test either.

Please take any test you are offered, it’s a no brainier to me.

Sarnia Fri 11-Sep-20 13:10:25

My one and only cousin is just like your friend. She is 86 but refuses point blank to have any protective jabs for flu, shingles or pneumonia. When I have mentioned the bowel cancer screening kit she just shuts her eyes and tells me what a disgusting procedure it is.

Jane10 Fri 11-Sep-20 13:13:35

Tanith oh dear what a sad story and a salutary warning. thanks

Ilovecheese Fri 11-Sep-20 13:17:40

Missadventure you can have a "virtual colonocapy" with an MRI scan. No camera up your bottom, just a bit of air puffed in. Not exactly painful, uncomfortable yes. There would need to be a reson though, something already suspected.

annodomini Fri 11-Sep-20 13:19:38

I'm not sure what a sex life has in common with a camera being inserted in your nether regions.
Cervical cancer is caused by the human papiloma virus (herpes) which is sexually transmitted. Now that teenagers can have a vaccination, it's hoped that the incidence of the cancer will diminish. It may not be a camera, but a smear test may well be seen as invasive by those who resist such diagnostic tests.

Juno56 Fri 11-Sep-20 13:19:50

Thank you for sharing your experiences nexus63. There is a need I think to extend the routine bowel testing program to include those 50 and over rather than waiting until 60.

MissAdventure Fri 11-Sep-20 13:20:34

Can I?
How nice to know. grin
I'm suspicious of that "discomfort" word when it pertains to any part of my body.

Galaxy Fri 11-Sep-20 13:21:24

Many women for many reasons find cervical smears extraordinarily difficult, I dont think mocking those fears moves anything forward.

Juno56 Fri 11-Sep-20 13:21:54

tanith thank youthanks

kittylester Fri 11-Sep-20 13:26:39

I have every test going even though I'd rather stick my head in the sand.

Of my two brothers, one will not go for blood tests, do the bowel screening or even have a flu jab.

The other is like me.

The letter prior to the bowel test makes me smile - I assume that it's just to ease you in gently!!

kittylester Fri 11-Sep-20 13:27:46

And, I think the breast cancer screening should be extended past 70.

DanniRae Fri 11-Sep-20 13:40:01

I don't need a smear test because I have had a hysterectomy but I always have all the other tests and the flu jab.

tanith Fri 11-Sep-20 14:33:39

kittylester if you are over 70 and wish to have a mammogram you can ring them to request one they are quite obliging.

Thankyou for the [floweres] he is sorely missed, if only?

geekesse Fri 11-Sep-20 14:57:09

A number of family members died from bowel cancer, and had a lousy couple of years of surgery, radiotherapy and chemo. My cousin refused treatment when she was diagnosed, and had a wonderful last year of her life, with no pain until the last week of her life. Her only regret was that she knew she had cancer.

I thought deeply about all this - I was close to my cousin, and have decided I don’t want to know. So the kit went unused, and I don’t have mammograms.

BlueSky Fri 11-Sep-20 15:30:57

That's your prerogative of course Geekesse. My last few smears were quite uncomfortable so I'm glad I'm now too old.

M0nica Fri 11-Sep-20 15:35:15

I do all the tests, as does DH. Most of us have changed babies nappies and dealt with other peoples small children in extremis, why are people so embarrassed about dealing with their own waste matter?

I am completely unembarrassed about stripping off for genital examinations or talking about these matters. As a child, I had an ongoing bowel problem that meant I was always having to take my knickers off for rectal examinations and barium enemas etc etc. Always with my mother present, I hasten to add.

BlueBelle Fri 11-Sep-20 15:41:45

A (not very close) family member won’t do anything like this The last time the poo test popped through her letter box it sat on the side with no intention of being used until one day the husband said we may as well do these and they did and the lady’s came back as suspicious and yes she had bowel cancer which has been operated on and although she nearly died with pneumonia after the operation she has survived the cancer and leading a normal life however she now has shingles because she didn’t want the shingles jab ??‍♂️

Starblaze Fri 11-Sep-20 15:42:46

I hate the thought that woman could die because they are afraid to get their bits out or of a moment of discomfort. It's actually heartbreaking.

I hope everyone can find the support they need to take care of themselves. You matter.

Greeneyedgirl Fri 11-Sep-20 15:45:04

I think bowel screening starts from 55 now with a one off colonoscopy. The poo test is for older people, so I guess some wouldn’t want the more invasive, but earlier test, which will diagnose abnormalities, and polyps, which can become cancerous. Seems worthwhile to me.
Not sure the evidence is robust enough for breast screening, but that is a personal choice.

JenniferEccles Fri 11-Sep-20 16:30:58

I wonder, nationwide, just how many people die every year because they were too embarrassed, couldn’t be bothered, found the test distasteful or simply just buried their head in the sand?

It’s tragic to think of how many lives could be saved if only people accepted every test/scan on offer.

janeainsworth Fri 11-Sep-20 16:39:55

So the kit went unused, and I don’t have mammograms.

I don’t either geekesse, and my reasons are nothing to do with discomfort, fear, or embarrassment.