Heavy handed bully of a hospital security man

Reported.

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I used to know a big burly security man who was terrified of being kicked in the shins - you should have done it merlotgran.

I had to accompany someone to the hospital this week. They had a nurse sat outside the department doing all the Covid screening stuff. Far more sensible.

Tears for me too, Merlot. Just an awful experience for you and your husband. So sorry you had to go through that.

Just reminded me of many years ago, when my dear husband was in hospital. The amazing car par attendant (a saint) ‘allowed’ me in the evenings to park in the empty Consultants’ spaces, after a long drive from work to visit DH. I will never ever forget that lovely man’s kindness.

I'm reading this with a huge lump in my throat and tears ready to fall .. what a horrific, and stressful occurrence. I'm just angry on behalf for you and your husband ., as if you don't have enough to cope with, you had to stand up to a complete and utter waste of oxygen

"He doesn't need a wheelchair, he can walk!"

Ah, so now we can assume that the offensive oik on the door was probably a Doctor, Merlot. ? If I'd had that wheelchair, he'd have had tyre marks all up his bouncer's vest!

Feel lots better soon, Mr Merlot. Nighty night, both. Sleep well.

This post brought tears to my eyes reading how vulnerable people are being bullied and upset by ignorant thicko’s supposedly working alongside frontline people at hospitals.
I always feel compelled to defend the defenceless and could not standby and see anyone hurt by this kind of behaviour. I’d have to say something to the offending “bouncer” and call the police. These types of security men should be posted at A&E on Friday and Saturday night’s to protect the staff from the awful drunks and druggies that turn up.

Oh, I'm mad on your behalf!

My inner tigress is a force to be reckoned with when backed into a corner.

Shouldn't be necessary when DH has received so much support and excellent treatment. He's a brave and positive man so heaven help any ignorant and unfeeling 'jobsworth' who thinks he can flex his muscles in an outpatients department full of fragile and vulnerable people.

I was staying calm until I asked politely who would push the wheelchair if I wasn't allowed in.

His reply?

'He doesn't need a wheelchair. He can walk.'

It gave me great pleasure to watch him walking away from his job!

Well - neither of you needed that! I know that feeling of having an ailing partner and having to clear their way through the various systems that they need to engage with - battle their way through might be a better expression.

I seemed to spend all my time fighting for my OH's rights and his well-being; I know that sense of the inner tigress that emerges. How sad that this is sometimes necessary with those services whose raison d'etre is to be of help.

I am so sorry you have this problem today and hope very much that it is not repeated.

I am so sorry you experienced this Merlot. It is totally unacceptable. I wish your DH well with his radiotherapy. He will be pleased when it is over I know.

Really sorry you've had to go through this merlot; attending hospital at any time is stressful enough without having to sidestep a bloke who thinks he's a bouncer at a nightclub. You've done the right thing in escalating it to PALS and they should get back to you with their findings in about 28 days. The current situation seems to have brought out the very worst in some people who appear to have been waiting for this very moment to be made to feel so important.
During lockdown #1 I had a similar experience in a local Tesco Express store when a security guard was under the impression that he had to follow customers out into the car park and photograph them and their car registration plates. He only lasted 1 day!

I have been to Addenbrookes hospital in Cambridge many many times over the last 40 odd years and this really sickens me, I’ve never heard anything like it, my heart goes out to you both, and I’m pleased it’s on cctv too, wishing you both all the very best Merlotgran, sending you both a virtual hug

Merlotgran.
Isn't it enough that our loved ones are having to go through the trauma of ill health without the added stress of a '' bully'' full of his own importance in a unifom/ wearing a badge merely illustrating what job he has been given?
Far to many of this type around and no one should be afraid in reporting them.

Merlotgran very distressing and unnecessary, hopefully not to be repeated for anyone else, pleased you feel a bit better now.
Grandmafrench how very heartbreaking for your friend and sad for you,

That is quite shocking Merlot and unforgivable. I trust by now he’s been sent packing with more than a flea in his ear! I hope you & DH are more relaxed this evening ??

Glad you're a bit more relaxed now merlot.

Spangler

The clinic next door to outpatients is for disablement services. They have state of the art wheelchairs you can borrow. One good shove and they go like the clappers with a dead man's handle for a brake!!

I don't suppose Mr Security was going to chase me down the the long corridors after I sneaked in but I wasn't taking any chances much to DH's horror amusement.

Not funny at the time but after a G&T I can be a bit more chilled about it.

So sorry to hear this Merlotgran, it just astounds you doesn't it. When my late husband became ill in Portugal I flew out to collect him. The security guard at the hospital, a podgy boy, took an instant dislike to me and always made me wait, even when I had my pass. At one time my husband and I were outside and he came out and started shouting at us, and dragged us back into the hospital through A&E where many people were in dire straits. I wish I could go back and kick him in the nuts.

Merlotgran, what a horrible man, hopefully your complaint will mean that nobody else suffers the same treatment.
Hope you’re feeling calmer now, you could both do without the added stress.
Sad for your friend Grandmafrench.
Thank goodness for humour Daddima, we could all do with a brother like yours at the moment.

merlotgran you have described the security man at our local Morrisons store so perfectly that it made me wonder if he's moonlighting at Addenbrooks Hospital.

It's particularly horrible to be treated that way when you're somewhere that's supposed to be helping you to feel better.

(I know, sadly)

I'm so glad you've written to pals. It's often the last thing you feel like doing after a long, long day.

Oh grandmafrench. So so sorry about your dear friend ‘s beloved husband. If you can keep your arms around her. The rest of us must all count our blessings.

No he wasn't merely following orders, Hetty58. He was probably not sufficiently trained but the benefit of doubt needs to be with the patients and their carers. He was rude and displaying bullying behaviour - splaying his legs, folding his arms and blocking the doorway. I have never seen hospital security personnel behave in that way and I'm no stranger to Addenbrooke's.

I will get my explanation make no mistake and as the kind security man who offered us an apology said, 'Don't worry. It will all be on CCTV.'

Good job I didn't kick his shins then.

You’re all lovely. I threw in the remark about the loss of a dear friend today in no way to detract from your comments, merlot. It’s just that she has used Addenbroke’s so often for too many years. It was hardly a rant from you - any decent human would feel the same and want to avoid the treatment you received, at any cost. I feel angry just reading about it - had I been there I would be the one ejected (maybe many times!) An ugly scene would have played out and offered some entertainment, at least! As Ellan says upthread, what’s the matter with people? Too many seem to have lost all shred of sense and compassion and decency. I do hope your DH gets some benefit from his treatment.
Daddima the world needs more laughter from chaps like your brother!