Female sterilisation.

Doctors try to persuade women to have long-term contraception instead.
In case they change their minds, maybe.
It seems sterilisation will only be considered if other options have proved unsuitable because of a physical reaction to them.

I think contraception is better than it was. I remember when any period problems were dealt with by having a hysterectomy, thankfully this is not so common now.

I think it's still a case of Consultants believing that women don't know their own minds and should wait for sterilisation until they are at least thirty and have children. I have read of a couple of women who never want children but have been refused sterilisation. Of course men can have a vasectomy at any time. In the 70s I had to get my husband's permission to be sterilised.

In the 80's Mr. S. had to have my signed agreement before he could have a vasectomy.

I asked my consultant to sterilise me while I was pregnant with baby no3 at age 22. He said he would but leave a few months after the baby was born . As me and the pill didn’t get along I insisted on it being much sooner . I was sterilised 3 days after baby was born . 47 years later I have never regretted it for a moment .

When i asked, for a valid reason as medical conditions interfered with the pill, I was told no. This was 15 years ago.

The doctor said, and i quote "What if all your children died in a fire".

I was furious and never saw him again.

When I decided that I didn’t want anymore children my doctor told me that there was no chance of having a sterilisation on the NHS because I was too young and healthy, I was 34.
I had it done privately. The doctor wanted my ( soon to be) ex husband’s signature because he still had a say in it as we weren’t divorced.
I took the consent form and signed it myself.

I was sterilised when my daughter was about six months it was 1992. I was about the file for divorce I don't recall having to get my husband's permission I was thirty six.

One reason, among many for the decline is that 'back in the day' it was often done after a birth - relatively easy as the uterus is 'high' and the Fallopian tubes more accessible.
When NHS funding models changed, maternity units were not paid for the extra night or two that a woman might stay in following sterilisation.
Also, vasectomy is, on the whole, a cheaper & simpler option.

VioletSky, I completely appreciate what you are saying, but this can be difficult. As a student nurse I was assigned to a gynae ward with a very well respected consultant who specialised in reversing sterilisations (in fairness, these days, you would do IVF instead). In the space of 3 months I nursed:
2 women who had threatened suicide if refused sterilisation in their early 20s, and had changed their minds.
2 women who had all their children die. In case of recognition here, I won't put the circumstances, but they were very distressing.
Personally, when discussing with my consultant, I said that I felt that whatever happened, I was 'done'. I also think that we should consider, and take responsibility for our decisions; but I do understand why some doctors feel reluctant.

I was told I had been on the pill for too long. I had two children and was at uni. I told the consultant I was done and he accepted that. However there were two young women having abortions and he refused to sterilise them at the same time.

He was just very innappropriate in what he said and how he said it Nannarose

I had nearly died giving birth twice and had 3 very irreplaceable children at the time, I now have 5.

Same doctor told me during an after birth check up that "you must wait 6 weeks for intercourse but there are other things you can do to please your husband" like that was a priority with a newborn, a kidney infection and after a very difficult birth.

I had my Fallopian tubes tied when I was 28, after a third unplanned child, 46 years ago. It was illegal then, but my doctor (female, of course!) respected my wish and went ahead. It was done privately, in a private hospital and my apendix was removed to justify/hide the real procedure. It was one of the most important and decisive things in my life, personnal and professional, it set me free from the burden of reproduction.
I love my three children.

These days women could freeze their eggs and then be sterilised - same for men, with sperm, too.

My mum said that when she was having her two babies in the 50’s the consultant was v keen to sterilise women after their second baby. The irony was that the consultant had five children and didn’t seem keen on taking her own advice!

Thisismyname1953

I asked my consultant to sterilise me while I was pregnant with baby no3 at age 22. He said he would but leave a few months after the baby was born . As me and the pill didn’t get along I insisted on it being much sooner . I was sterilised 3 days after baby was born . 47 years later I have never regretted it for a moment .

I know a young woman who was told the same when expecting her (planned) 5th child.
The result - she was pregnant with baby no 6 before she got an appointment for the absolutely-essential counselling session.

This was only 4 or 5 years ago.

I asked for sterilization at 30. I had one child (never had any more, didn't want more) and was married. I wasn't asked for husband's signature, but I was asked what I'd do if I got pregnant again. I said I'd have an abortion, so they agreed.

But then I left my husband so didn't bother with the sterilization.

I was 42, single and child free having never ever remotely wanted children. Saw a female consultant who there and then put a date in her diary for me. She said in his referral letter my GP had expressed concern as I had no children. I stated that at 42 I was hardly likely to suddenly find any maternal instinct. The surgery on the Friday was a doddle, I was home two hours later, out to dinner the next night and back at work on the Monday. It was lovely to not think about contraception any more.

I asked for sterilisation at 38 as I couldn't take the pill and DH had chickened out of a vasectomy twice. Our daughters were teenagers.
I was put on an NHS waiting list to discuss this with a consultant. A month later I was pregnant.
I saw the same consultant at my first ante natal appointment. He saw my sterilisation request and put me to the top of the queue. I had it done 6 weeks after DS was born.

In the 1970s I was 32 and was having an operation anyway so asked if they would sterilise me at the same time . There was no counselling or anything they just agreed but asked my husband to sign the form that he agreed with the operation. My mother was astounded as she had been 32 when I was born but I had some years of ill health and was happy with the family I had .

I was 29, 3 dificult pregnancies,first daughter died at 7 weeks old.

Second daughter,and my son delivered by C section,I asked to be sterilised whilst having my second C section.

My consultant asked what would happen if my children died,I answered you cant replace them,that was good enough for him.

Sadly my second daughter did die at 23,she was irreplaceable.

tincao, I am glad that you got the procedure that you needed, and it is a shame that you had to go about it in a clandestine way. But in the interests of accuracy, as this is a UK based site, that would not have been the case in the UK.

yes, VioletSky, I understand that there are some inappropriate doctors out there - fewer now I hope. I have been fortunate mostly to work with caring and respectful colleagues.

It was standard, maybe still is, to do a D&C at the time of a sterilisation 'just in case you're pregnant'.
I told the doctor I'd been making sure not to be pregnant for many years and was sure I could cope for a little while longer so I didn't want the D&C.
He seemed a bit annoyed I wasn't following the script.

Nanarose Ive met doctors who made mistakes with my care and ive met wonderful doctors.

But the issue that I addressed is a completely sexist man who didnt trust me, a woman, to make decisions regarding my own body.

Other peoples regret in their decisions has no baring at all. I had no chance to be given a fair assessment on whether i was capsble of making an informed and rational decision. The argument that my children might all die in a fire was not a rational argument. Statistically i would assume that happening to be far less likely than my regretting my choice so it wasn't a necessary argument. I had 1 planned child and 2 conceived on birth control. I went on to have 2 more on birth control.

My children are very loved but I had a consistent history of using birth control.

That consistent history is why a female doctor did agreed to refer me. I became pregnant again before the procedure.

After that pregnancy i was told they no longer do it and i could no longer have it on the NHS. I have no idea how true that is or how widespread...

Fortunately it was entirely easy for my husband to make that decision and get himself booked in for a procedure. After the 5th lol

How horrible VS

Some docs should not be allowed to practice unless they pass a course on human empathy

Indeed VioletSky, I agree with you; and I thought of those women I nursed when I made my own decision.
Mercifully I was never put in the position that they were.