Breast feeding- were any of you actively discouraged from BF?

Thanks for all who commented.

My intention was not to open yet another Breast versus Bottle debate.

But to find out if any of you, or DDs, colleagues, friends, etc- in the past, currently or anywhere in between- were actually DISCOURAGED from Breast Feeding, and by whom, with reasons stated or not.

Zoejory, I truly do not think it is genetic. But expectations leading to advice, comments, support or not, etc.

In the cases of younger colleagues, living in extended families, the MIL encouraged Bottle feeding as a method of control, on both DIL, son and baby. OH also had several similar cases.

My first child was born in 1965.We had ten days in hospital in those days and the nurses were most helpful and encouraging in teaching us to breastfeed.One mother a few days in decided it wasn’t for her and her breasts were bound quite tightly.

MY 2 Children born mid 70s. Cottage hospital. Think I was the only one there who breast fed, the rest bottle fed. I remember the staff being surprised I wasn’t going along with the rest of the mothers.
I stopped after 6 weeks as it was so painful.

I had 10 days in hospital too. The babies were all in a nursery together and brought to the wards for ( bottle) feeding.

Fleurpepper

Thanks for all who commented.

My intention was not to open yet another Breast versus Bottle debate.

But to find out if any of you, or DDs, colleagues, friends, etc- in the past, currently or anywhere in between- were actually DISCOURAGED from Breast Feeding, and by whom, with reasons stated or not.

Zoejory, I truly do not think it is genetic. But expectations leading to advice, comments, support or not, etc.

In the cases of younger colleagues, living in extended families, the MIL encouraged Bottle feeding as a method of control, on both DIL, son and baby. OH also had several similar cases.

I have quite up to date info about some.

No, no one was discouraged. But medical staff do nto have as much time to put to this as they would like.

Things though are wrong in the Uk, as apparently, the Uk is literally the worst country in the world for the amount of breastfed babies. Apparently.

I dare say that decades ago, some people thought that formula (scientifically prepared!) - that you had to pay for, had to be better than what was there for nowt.

I do remember that after the birth of dd2, a slightly older friend, with children a few years older, told me she could never even have thought of breastfeeding - she actually shuddered as she said it!
I found that very odd - the mere thought evidently disgusted her.
Must admit that my choice of BFing back then was not primarily for health reasons - I just though it’d be a lot less of a faff than bottles and sterilising etc., particularly as with my first, I was taking her back at 6 weeks to Oman, where western style shops were still relatively few and supplies of formula (among other things) might not be reliable.

I breastfed both mine (1979 & 1981) for about a year, despite having had caesarean sections for each of them, including an emergency one for the firstborn. Staff were very supportive and encouraging and several mothers breast-fed; this was in a Midlands hospital.

It seemed to vary, depending on the hospital. Being in hospital for 10 days helped immensely. Now, new mothers are sent home much sooner where they can potentially be influenced by well-meaning relatives.

My first child was a very difficult birth, 1984 and breast feeding was quite difficult to begin with. But the hospital staff were wonderful and very patient with me and my baby. It took a good week or so to really get established. 2nd baby 1986 was an easy birth and bf was a doddle.

I too took the view that I would not feed my baby in public toilets ....why would anyone eat in a lavatory. 😂 I fed my babies anywhere and everywhere. I was very discreet and always made sure I had a shawl I could drape to protect my modesty.

I was once stuck in an overcrowded surgery for over an hr, (standing room only, luckily I was seated). Baby (my first) started fussing, wanting to be fed. Being an anxious first time mum and shy about feeding in public, I turned my chair around and faced the wall, trying to avoid embarrassment.

Next to me was an elderly retired army colonel who had quite a reputation for being a bit of a curmudgeon. I was dreading him saying something nasty. Instead he gently patted my shoulder, and told me I was wonderful, not to feel ashamed or embarrassed, that I was doing the best and most natural thing in the world for my child.

Support often came from the most unlikely places.

It was my FIL who was the most uncomfortable at first until his daughter, my SIL, had her baby a few weeks later. Then he relaxed and was full of encouragement for both of us.

I breastfed my 3 children in the 1970's and enjoyed it. My mother had breastfed me but I don't know for how long. MIL kept asking when I was going to stop. I was very modest and would leave the room if my dad or fil were around. I was a little surprised when dil breastfed while visiting with me and DH in living room. She mostly was covered up but DH seemed a little embarrassed at first but overall he was fine with it. DD and DILs pumped and left bottles in the fridge or freezer bags when they returned to work so that helped me and childcare workers.

I’d agree that the longer stay in hospital helped. With Daughter (born 1995) I stayed in 5 days - even the ward orderly knew how to get a baby to latch on! With son (1997), less than 24 hours and you were out, whether first time mother or otherwise. I was dazed and confused enough even after recent experience, I do question how a new mother coped.
My babies were my focus for the first three months of their lives and I happily fed on demand. Now mums want to be out within days - perhaps some just haven’t the time?

I breastfed all 5 of mine for up to a year with no negative comments from anyone. Fortunately had no problems. Both daughters have bf theirs - again no negativity, despite Ireland being even worse than UK for bf rates.
But a friend's daughter who had twins a few years ago was told in maternity hospital when she said she was going to breastfeed them "but you have twins!". Midwives and doctor were not supportive and she got a private lactation consultant when she got home and successfully fed them for over a year.

Obviously experiences can vary a lot.

Had both my children by emergency c section . My daughter was born in 1983 and I breast fed her for 3 weeks and found out I was starving her because I hadn't enough milk. Put her straight on the bottle and she thrived . Because of the guilt starving my daughter when my son was born in 1987 he was bottle fed from the start. Both where born at the same hospital and we where given the choice to bottle or breast feed and supported whatever we choose by all the nursing staff.

I wouldn't have stood for any interference with my choices from either my mom or mother in law. My mom breast fed me but my mother I law bottle fed my husband.

No, the opposite but couldn't breast feed DS. They said after 4 days of stress that he was 'breast shy' and it was such an upsetting experience for us both, I didn't even try with his brother.

Not sure about your stats Fleurpepper
A new UNICEF report released Wednesday that ranks countries by breastfeeding rates shows that in high-income countries, more than one in five babies is never breastfed, whereas in low- and middle-income countries, one in 25 babies is never breastfed.

Among the high-income countries, Ireland, France and the United States had the three lowest breastfeeding rates

So I wonder where you found evidence that the U.K. is (yet again?) the worst in the world

MtM it’s a bit like everything else. You can find evidence/stats to prove or disprove anything you want.
A new UNICEF report sounds quite valid though.
But now you could be inundated with GNs from all those places giving examples of why the UNICEF report can’t be true.

MawtheMerrier

Not sure about your stats Fleurpepper
A new UNICEF report released Wednesday that ranks countries by breastfeeding rates shows that in high-income countries, more than one in five babies is never breastfed, whereas in low- and middle-income countries, one in 25 babies is never breastfed.

Among the high-income countries, Ireland, France and the United States had the three lowest breastfeeding rates

So I wonder where you found evidence that the ^U.K. is (yet again?) the worst in the world^

How bizarre!

Not given any stats, nor said the UK is (yet again?) the worst in the world.

Things though are wrong in the Uk, as apparently, the Uk is literally the worst country in the world for the amount of breastfed babies. Apparently

Apologies, how could I possibly have misunderstood this?

Mollygo

MtM it’s a bit like everything else. You can find evidence/stats to prove or disprove anything you want.
A new UNICEF report sounds quite valid though.
But now you could be inundated with GNs from all those places giving examples of why the UNICEF report can’t be true.

🙂🙂🙂

So I wonder where you found evidence that the U.K. is (yet again?) the worst in the world

If you were to read the thread again, Maw, I think you'll find that Fleurpepper hasn't said that at all.

Your continual sniping at her is very noticeable; and unpleasant.

I didn't want to breast feed in 1968. I had a comment from one of the nurses about
'Nipples like Chapel hat pegs ' why wasn't I feeding !!

I’m sorry MaizieD - my comment was in reply to the post I quoted verbatim. Did I misread it?
Where else have I expressed an unacceptable opinion?

Even within countries there are variable rates of breastfeeding. There were figures published for Ireland that showed there were higher rates of bf in more affluent areas and low rates in the more deprived areas. Probably due to a combination of education and peer support. If you have friends breastfeeding, it's more likely that you will too and can compare experiences.

Fleurpepper

Yes, agreed GSM- but we also know DDs, DLs, younger friends and colleagues, who shared their experience with us.

Great to know Witzend. Some mums who want to BF do need support and help- as some do not find it as easy and natural as you did, for all sorts of reasons. From my experience, when problems arise, so many are discouraged, passively or activelly, and just told to give up and bottle feed- as I experienced.

And one of my DDs too, also after emergency C-section.

I had both of mine by emergency C- section and was told that I could not possibly breast feed. Both were in special care for first two days and I was very ill, so probably midwives thought it was better all round.
They (my two sons) were bottle fed in special care, and as a former midwife myself I knew that once a baby is fed from a bottle at birth, you will have a hard job getting him or her to take to the breast

The son is tired?
Oh poor little flower!

Who has been pregnant, recovering from birth, etc....

He needs to grow up