Denture misery causing major depression

I have not been in that terrible place Debbi but suggest you speak yo your new dentist before you go and try to explain how afraid you are.
They will probably be used to terrible teeth just now - as well as people suffering because of them.

Thinking of you.
You have been proactive and the good news is it can not get worse.

I have a Dentist phobia, to the point where , anxiety kicks in days before my appointment. I don’t have the best teeth in the world. My previous dentists have been awful and rude. I have now gone private and have a lovely lady. She does not overcharge. I told her if I had her years ago, I would have had a full and better set of teeth.
Don’t be embarrassed - my friend has hardly got any teeth left due to some health condition. But she goes regularly to her NHS Dentist in order to maintain the health of her remaining teeth. She wears a denture and looks really good.

I don't have a similar problem Debbi, but wanted to say that you shouldn't feel shame and embarassment - if your current dentist has made you feel this way, then shame on him, and you clearly need a fresh start with a better, kinder dentist. Ignore horror stories - they make the news, but the thousands of people who have uneventful experiences don't. I wish you well. x

And as Notsphaghetti says, I’m sure your Dentist has seen worse. So, don’t worry.

Debbiedoo I must have your dentists brother My lovely kind Greek NHS dentist left at Brexit and I have been allocated the dentist from hell Rough, rude not an ounce of empathy never acknowledges I m in the room, talks with his head away from me so I ve no idea what he’s saying I ve asked to be changed and they have taken me off his books but now told me they don’t have another nhs dentist to allocate me to
I too need some attention and no NHS dentist I m really in a pickle maybe I shouldn’t have said anything ( I rarely complain about anything) but his behaviour was awful
My friends husband was given the same dentist and called him a ‘right rough butcher’

NotSpaghetti

I have not been in that terrible place Debbi but suggest you speak yo your new dentist before you go and try to explain how afraid you are.
They will probably be used to terrible teeth just now - as well as people suffering because of them.

Thinking of you.
You have been proactive and the good news is it can not get worse.

Thank you, really appreciate your support

@BlueBelle,

Sounds exactly the same as the one I am dealing with...just awful!

I am just back from a new nhs dentist. My last two lovely ones left, so was nervous. I have a lifelong fear of dentists and was especially nervous today as I have teeth and jaw problems.
Happily he was very kind and reassuring, and early dats, but am quietly hoping he will be fine.

Debbidoo44. I work in dentistry and believe me ,your dentist will have seen far far worse. Any good clinician won’t shame you or make you feel bad.
I’d suggest speaking to the receptionist prior to your appointment about your anxiety and fear. Hopefully she will put this on your notes to prepare the dentist.
Also tell the dentist about your concerns straight away. We’re very used to nervous anxious patients.
Do you have someone who can accompany you ? It helps to have another pair of ears. When you’re nervous ,it can be hard to take onboard all the information you’ve been given , especially if it’s a complex case . Good luck

@Tenko,

Thank you, I will do that. just currently struggling to deal with the dentist I already have.

BlueBelle

Debbiedoo I must have your dentists brother My lovely kind Greek NHS dentist left at Brexit and I have been allocated the dentist from hell Rough, rude not an ounce of empathy never acknowledges I m in the room, talks with his head away from me so I ve no idea what he’s saying I ve asked to be changed and they have taken me off his books but now told me they don’t have another nhs dentist to allocate me to
I too need some attention and no NHS dentist I m really in a pickle maybe I shouldn’t have said anything ( I rarely complain about anything) but his behaviour was awful
My friends husband was given the same dentist and called him a ‘right rough butcher’

My butcher of a Spanish dentist, who ignored me when , pulling out a tooth that she hadn't anaesthetised properly, caused me great pain and anxiety, didn't leave after Brexit. Pleased to say though she was got rid of after numerous other complaints.

I had a dreadful fear of dentists after a pretty awful experience some years ago...I just avoided going and in all honesty put up with a lot of discomfort rather than act.

Just prior to the pandemic, I found a wonderful NHS dentist - I explained I was scared to the reception staff and they obviously briefed him, however on walking into the surgery, I actually burst into tears!
He was lovely...lots of talking, very gentle and we've taken things slowly.
I needed a denture but it looks fine.
I'd honestly suggest having a conversation before you arrive.
Good luck!

Tenko

Debbidoo44. I work in dentistry and believe me ,your dentist will have seen far far worse. Any good clinician won’t shame you or make you feel bad.
I’d suggest speaking to the receptionist prior to your appointment about your anxiety and fear. Hopefully she will put this on your notes to prepare the dentist.
Also tell the dentist about your concerns straight away. We’re very used to nervous anxious patients.
Do you have someone who can accompany you ? It helps to have another pair of ears. When you’re nervous ,it can be hard to take onboard all the information you’ve been given , especially if it’s a complex case . Good luck

Debbidoo44
Lovely advice from Tenno
I took the plunge and changed to a private dentist at the end of I experienced a very poor experience at my usual practice (completely new dentist post covid who could not complete a tooth extraction) I just factor the cost in now and feel more at ease at this dentist than any other I’ve ever seen.

I can really empathise!
I have an awful fear of dentists having been traumatised by one at a young age…. He appeared on a Panorama programme!
I would panic for days before even a routine check-up, and needed someone with me.
I then had a what I thought was a reasonable dentist for several years but was told I needed a cantilever bridge fixed and she tried to have me replace it, but continued to repair it, including root treating a back tooth through the bridge crown, badly, and damaging a nerve.
She left and I was then recommended a new dentist by a friend - TRANSFORMATION!
I now know what a good dentist really is!
He’s removed the broken bridge (£80 rather than £4.5k) as he reckoned I could live without it - he was right!
He knows I was nervous and talks me through every step of everything he does and I now willingly go without the need for anyone to come with me!
Have a chat with the receptionist and the dentist to let them know how you feel - good luck!

I completely understand your fear and apprehension at the prospect OP. I have good teeth with only the occasional thing needing fixed. I had a lovely lady dentist for years but she retired and the practice was taken over by a very nice young man who also does a good job. Even so I dread my visits and worry about them weeks before my routine appointments. I don't know why. I have no reason to. So I deeply sympathise with you. I hope all goes very well and very soon. Please let us know how you get on.

Fear and dental phobia seems to be so widespread and common that it ought to be subject of research and remedies it seems to me!
I too suffer from this fear, and a combination of that and lack of NHS dentists, means I am losing teeth and my mouth is in a miserable, painful state.
I finally had to bite the bullet before Xmas, as I was simply unable to eat, unless it was something I could suck on (thank god for chocolate....) and signed up with a private dentist. I am dreading the costs, but the level of support is markedly better than the NHS dentist I previously went to. The young dentist I have been assigned has been very patient, non-judgemental and talked to me about my fears, the treatment which will be necessary, and although my worse fears have been realised, ie that I have to have dentures (full upper set, partial lower set), and I am dreading this going ahead at the end of this month, at least I am not a gibbering wreck, just mildly terrified....

I too have a horror of Dentists. For me it is the feeling of being 'tied down' unable to move, call a halt or escape. I discussed this with my GP when I was due to have all my top teeth out and a denture fitted. GP supplied tranquilisers - 2 to be taken before the surgery and 2 for the following morning when I had to take out, clean and reinsert the denture. I cannot say that I enjoyed the procedure but I got through it OK - no screaming ad dabs, no panic attack, nor fainting fit. A couple of years later I had the bottom teeth out and again benefitted from the GP's tranquilisers.
.
The same GP also prescribed these magic pills for a friend with acute fear of flying, thus enabling her to visit family in Canada.

Poor you. My dentists went private a couple of years ago and we were nearly a year without NHS dentist but now we have one. He is Bulgarian and very cheerful, polite and thorough.

I was not happy with one of the dentists at my last place as he was rude, didn’t engage in conversation and he was rough. I told the receptionist this when she asked me if it all went OK. She was really embarrassed and I said “well you did ask.”

A short time later I read that he had been fiddling NHS paperwork and had claimed for hundreds of thousands for work he did not carry out. I knew he was dodgy!

I have just lost the last dentist in this area that did NHS, so am having to pay a monthly sum for a lesser service. There now seems to be a disconnect between levels of capability too. Mine will simply refer me on to an expensive orthodontist for the work you mention. Any dentist these days dealing with complexity will have seen what you describe before. With COVID and dental costs, so many people are in a worse state than they would have been years ago, so you will be in good company and no need to feel embarrassed.

Sorry you are going thru this.
How rude your current Dentist sounds.
Yes talk to the new Dental Practice. They should alay your fears.
Dentists have seen it all try not to worry.
My Df recently had a new top set.
Then he had teeth out and new Denture didn’t fit.
All sorted now and no further charges for adjustment - he just has to get used to the new set.
I am sure you will be smiling confidently again soon, good luck x

I'm another one who has been through more than enough with my teeth, not that I have all that many left. I'm a war baby, like a lot of you, I suspect.
I'm sure my parents were trying to do the best, but the reason we went to that particular butcher of a dentist was that his wife had been at school with our grandmother. Not the best reason.
Both our AC, now in their early 50s, have perfect teeth, thanks to fluoride and better dentistry.

I can understand your apprehension and fear. I have had a cantilever bridge since I was 21. You are told that you have to preserve all the teeth around it and I think that builds up tension within you.
Mine has been changed 4 times each time using more tooth until it is now abridged by two teeth that are crowned. The last dentist I saw was so young she had never heard of one. I'm giving her a chance and seeing her again.
You should ask for a change of dentist if you do not like the Dentist you have you'll never have faith in them. I also complained about the hygienist who was so rough she nearly pulled the bridge from the teeth. I don't like complaining but if you listen to others they are very positive about their needs and so I copy them. take someone with you and even into the surgery if yo need them they can always st in a chair in the corner.
Best of luck and I hope you get things sorted out.

This is my first post and not sure if it's ok to mention insurance providers but I joined denplan recently and can't believe the difference in the dentist experience.so calm and relaxed ,it might be worth looking in to.we don't have a lot of extra money but feel it is worth it.

Just re read my post and want to explain why it made a difference to have insurance ,it's not just the cost, the dentist can give you more time so is more relaxed and explains everything, seemingly NHS dentists are on very tight time schedules.