BLACK DOG 25

Unfortunately - I've put this off but cant anymore - remember my ear problem all? Left ear almost cant here. First time round, in 2 weeks it was better with spray. Great I thought. Then only about 2 weeks after the same thing happened - but this time it doesnt seem like it is healing, and also of course if it is a recurring thing then it needs more attention. So I won't dawdle, will ring early and try and get an appointment.

Tomorrow has a big treat and..a challenge. Its the facial I booked, a one off as I just want advice really going forward (stuff like facial hair, best options aging skin, etc)

...but its at the gym, so its my "try out" to see how I feel there.

What a relief to catch up on your news, Doodle - thank you so much, now I have a "picture" to work on.

Yes, the costs will be tight. But I think it will actually make the move possible. The sheer relief of being able to "jump" when a flat comes up. I've got my lovely cleaner to keep things hunky dory and have decided which minimum but essential bits need doing over this year.
Yes, resale value is rubbish, thats why the price has gone down from 2 years ago, plus they have a new rival just down the valley. But frankly I don't care about the resale value, my DiL's mum and dad can help them out financially, you see. My very well off sister has promised me just one thing - if I had to go in a home, she would pay top up fees I couldn't afford.

Lovely idea Wyllow 🤣
Yes
Not really but afraid of falling so don’t walk far.
Yes
Yes lady is neighbour on same floor and a really good and kind friend,
Yes I sleep ok mostly
Yes I have hospital. Appt in two weeks.
Scareycat glad you had a good hol
HVDY hope throat better soon.
Sweetpeasue aunt does sound more confused. Does she have family near by?
Wyllow McCarthy and Stone sound just right for you but check all the costs associated and re sale values.
Ellie Anne hope you’re ok.
Love to all x

Not on the car, on the boat - my brain really is a bit over tired...

It’s good to see you back safe and sound, Scaredycat. I’m so glad you didn’t face tossing and turning on the car, it must make a huge difference. Sooo hot with you?( I’ve got cool rain delights.)

It must have helped settle when DD came by and you could share holiday news. I am mega impressed with your DH..its always the worst thing on returning, a bag full of clothes (with added sand)

Doodle, as you cant write much I thought I’d write questions so you could answer with a yes or no. I don't want you to do this if you dont feel OK , no offence will be taken.

So ...if I put

1. Have you managed to get to the hospice?

And you just answer

1. Yes.


1. Are you getting to the hospice?
2. Can you manage walks so you get out and about on feet?
3. Are you going to to the church group for coffee
4. Are you seeing the lady from your own flats
5. Can you sleep OK with your arm
6. Are the doctors taking are of your arm?

Sending as ever warmest thoughts, and holding you in the light.

Hi all
SweetPeaSue- the journey home was thankfully uneventful. Yes tinged with sadness at leaving such a beautiful place. Sea was like a millpond- good job as it was an 8 hour crossing!
Ah your dear little Aunt- she just wanted to be cool. But it does sound a bit like she’s getting a bit worse. Poor DH this heat must be so debilitating for him- glad he has the spray to help him. It’s much hotter here than where we were- heat is awful with AF - my ankles have disappeared!!
HVDY- Been busy unpacking early as it soooo hot . DD popped over for coffee so good excuse to stop. No washing to do as DH got it all done in France- would you believe it!!
We start cat duties on Thursday. One of DD cats never shuts up unless he’s eating or asleep!
What a nuisance to lose your voice but as you say it’s an ill wind! Hope it comes back quickly.
EllieAnne- Don’t worry about past remarks- we can’t always say the right thing or Use the right words. Fortunately most people don’t really listen anyway so she’s probably forgotten it already.
Good advice from Wyllow.
Doodle- it’s so sad when the birthdays anniversary comes round - it will always be a poignant day but you,ll have many memories of all the lovely Birthdays you spent together. Pleased you had the Zoom with your lovely Sons.
You are doing so well dealing with all the hand pain and resulting difficulties. I think by now I,d be a right old misery.
Think of you so often - sending a hug although it’s a bit hot for one!!
Wyllow- that weeding tool is by Ryobi ( cordless patio cleaner with wire brush)
Glad you’re getting some comfortable new clothes for the Summer weather. Isn’t it funny how they jump into your
basket- mine too.
So happy you got into the Peaks- is it via the Snake ? It’s a wonderful area and have spent lovely times there with my Sister. You have had such a productive positive few days.
Could you send us the rain please?
I think we could all do with being like that little dog- if only.
Nadateturbe- thinking of you too- I do wish you could get a break from your discomfort and be able to do some of the things you love.

Thinking again of all the BD posters we haven’t seen for a while- hope life is treating you as well as possible. Love to all

Found this in my photo album.

Actually, same delight here - rain at last, welcome, more the better (just one day and nights good soak, then it can go back to being sunny again).

Sorry for the croak, that was funny tho seeing the positives for DH

Wyllow3 You're experiencing a high, it seems, but you recognise that and know how to control yourself. You've experienced more MH issues than the majority of people, I think. You were very kind to that man.

It's raining! Lovely (apart from having washing out, but never mind). Not sure what's wrong with my throat, but it was croaky yesterday (not sore, though) and now my voice is barely a whisper. Frustrating for me, but peaceful for DH. Hope everyone's ok x

(PS, a little explanation about the length of my stay. MH wards being in short supply even then, most people were stuck in a "revolving door"situation. But the local University Prof I charge of Psychiatric stuff had 6 beds on that ward - a sort of project to see if long stays would really help people. and it most certainly did me. I was very fortunate, but the length of stay didn't mean I was any more ill than others, in fact I wasn't.) it was a unique experience. Living alongside people multi-culturally and class wise: the traditional Muslim man who confided in me (as I was older, known to be trustworthy, and dressed plainly) - that did I think the staff wanted to kill him. obvs I said, well I didn't think so, but understood how he felt. when he left a group his friends came to collect him, we shook hands to their surprise. Much more like that. When I post on these issues I cant reveal why I do understand certain things, but it was from that.

I learnt more about life than one would in most situations, because most people who've MH problems are very open indeed and tell it like it is, and there is a lot of gallows humour.

Definitely a lazy day here after yesterday, HVDY See if I can stick to my self-promise as was OTT high last night, delightful tho it was.

I like vocal cats, but Jaffa makes up for it with his own brand of affection.

Wyllow3 You had a bad time, if you had to be in hospital all that while. I'm so pleased you're doing so well at the moment. Your poor friend, being abused by the person who should have been one of her protectors. Good that you both managed to keep a sense of humour. Beautiful picture there.

Been across to feed the cat. Sweet old thing but very vocal (unlike Jaffa who can barely manage a squeak). Lazy day today. More clothes to advertise on Vinted. Back later. x

Last nights summer solstice

I think your neighbour has bi-polar 1, HVDY. Worse extremes. But with good meds it really can be kept under control. she sounds like my dear dear friend from when I was an inpatient for 6 months, tho I was depressed and of course didn.t need to ever be sectioned. But my friend R did, very dramatically too, bless.

She really had it bad cos she was groomed as a child by Dad. We were opposites. We became friends cos her "high" when modified helped me with my low. One day she was grumpy with me and I asked why. she said "I'm afraid you'll think I'm common". so I replied, "I'm afraid you'll think I'm posh" and we laughed.

Thank you Sweetpeasue, very thoughtful.

I'd have loved to have been there, HVDY.

Thank you for sharing the story about your neighbour, I really like to hear other MH stories.

What a great prize, that is really quite something. How times change indeed. When we were little it was like another planet!

I thought you might like the croc song. [grin} Littlegirl is probably a couple of years too young for it. Save it for if she gets a "croc" stage, or it might be dinosaurs, or Barbie dolls, who can tell.

SweetpeaSue Your aunt is quite confused now, by the sound of it. I bet she was pleased to see you. This heat/humidity is horrible, isn't it?

Wyllow3 One live act was a group of 15 year old boys, playing guitars and drums, singing Arctic Monkeys, The Killers, and Oasis. They were excellent. It sounds as though you had a very productive day. The difference in you is astonishing. My neighbour (whose cat I'm feeding for a week) has bipolar disorder. When she had her worst "low", she didn't get out of bed/have a shower, etc., for 9 months and was sectioned for a while. Her husband and adult kids were so upset. After that, she went from strength to strength, travelled to Dubai alone to see their daughter, and had several holidays with friends. It's so good to see her enjoying life. I hope your family will visit you soon. Love the crocodile song .

Little Girl was collected at 7.45. Parents had been to "The Magic of Thailand", an outdoor event. DIL won tickets for a flight to Thailand, so they're going to have a week next February, without the children. (DH and I didn't have a night away from our kids until one was 18, the other 15 (1 night in Oxford). How times change. Hope everyone manages to sleep ok tonight, in this heat x

Doodle I'm sorry for your very sad day. There must be so many memories of your DHs birthdays and times of family celebrations. Your sons are a blessing aren't they and so glad for the zoom . Please don't worry about your shorter posts - we all care and understand. Take care of yourself and sleep well.
Wyllow Very warm evening here foe solstice. Occasional quick bouts of light rain but heat is so humid.
Do enjoy your treats - yum- and hope the trousers are good fit.
Amazing what you've done today and the drive out is just what you need to boost confidence and get rid of the 'past ghosts' and see your favourite spots, making them your own.
The visit to Mccarthy n Stone flats will surely help to make your mind up but take it slowly, though good you can picture things. It all sounds lovely with views.

So glad it 'felt so good' and it's nice to be included as BDs in all of your optimism for future. You're doing good Wyllow!
Sleep well.x

Tonights music is completely different but might make you smile. I was following a train of thought re DGD L, the disabled one, who is crocodile crazy, and have sent it to Dad

www.youtube.com/watch?v=CpXlvLOyBVI

Oh nadateturbe you poor soul. A trial indeed. Yes, I do always feel you are with us, and that music is one of the greatest balms for the soul, for some of us. Love back xx.

You bet I bought some nice stuff HVDY - more below.
It must have been a delightful - but tiring day, in the heat. Live music too -wow.

Thats the trouble with A and e, isnt it Sweetpeasue its a daunting experience unless your GP has deemed fit to ring ahead. Yes - Amazon is wonderful. I know we “should” be looking at UK alternatives - but it really is just too good, too helpful, so much one needs, and quickly. I smiled when I read about the cool of the shop, as that just what I thought today. My tum is on hold and huge because of todays excitements and events, just have to have a day tomorrow taking lots of movicol…

Your Aunt is not too good, is she…poor love, taking her out is good, company, a little chat.

Tonight is not just any old light evening ..its the solstice, the world turns and it used to be celebrated back when people were more in touch with nature.. although I wouldnt go back to that time - what, no gransnet and BD’s…

A most poignant day, Doodle. The memories you have of your treasured husband, the good and the tough times - so glad to hear that you had the Zoom.
Never worry about not being able to post much, I recall so much when you were able, not forgotten.

After my supermarket shop (which included an accidental pari of trousers, just what I needed, falling into the basket)..then there was the choc, and the accidental 3 for £8 deli treats…

Anyway after that, it was so nice to be out in the car, hair blowing in the wind, all the green, I decided to have a drive into the high peak to visit some favourite spots.
This is almost 3 years since I went to exactly the same place for the last time, the last outing.

Enjoyed a spot of research, as my family have set a date and place to stay in the High Peak. Hungry and thirsty, I raided the shopping in the boot and had bought a Costa on the way.

I’ve taken the bull by the horns and WhatsApp’d my “new”nephew for a getting to know date.

Finally, on the way home I popped into the McCarthy and Stone flats that I’m considering in the long term.

My Quaker friend used to live there so of course - the nice duty manager remembered her well so the chat was nice and relaxed, after all, just walking in - I know what a flat and the general layout is like - peaceful, views, both facing of you get the front lots of facilities, nice person on duty, just the ticket for forward planning:

BD’s - it felt good. It felt so right.

But no rush I’m not going to pressure myself.

Back later.

Evening all. nadateturbe sorry you’re feeling so unwell. Hope things improve soon.
It’s DH’s birthday today. Been sad a lot but had a lovely zoom with both our sons .
Sorry my hands aren’t that bad it’s the muscles used in typing that make them hurt,
Have a good weekend all.

EllieAnne Re-read my post yo you and doesn't sound right. To be clear my meaning was that most of is , if not all, have regretted revealing things we wish we hadn't. Sorry if ot was pit clumsily.

EllieAnne Surely not many of us have afterwards regretted saying things we wished we hadn't. I hope it turned out OK with your friend . Just as Wyllow said really.
HVDY Amazon is amazingly easy to shop with and there's not a lot they don't have is there. You're right about A&E and DH knows how awful it can be as he's sat with me a few times. The carnival sounded good . We went out this morning to Tescos with aunt and was lovely and cool in there- the heat hit us when we came out.
Doodle Oh you are really suffering with your hands - it's so unfair. You have enough to deal with. Thinking of you as always.
Nadateturbe So sorry for your suffering. You've had the eyes playing up for a while now on top of the ME. Glad you like listening to Wyllows music too.
Wyllow Hope your tum is OK today. Thankyou for the music link.Not played it yet but will have a look later.
Yes,haha, the 'yogic' pic did put me off a bit but I'm interested in the meditation as I got some ideas from MH group so thanks for that, I'll have a look.
Tbh I've not got a bag packed for DH but I need to so good you reminded me.
Hope your day has been OK. I really like the long cool nights too and nice to sit out in dusk.
Scaredycat Hope you're home now and the travelling wasn't too bad .

Took aunt out this morning . When we arrived her door was locked and we went round banging on her windows for ages. When she finally appeared she was all bothered, didn't know what to wear. She asked me if she should go out in a little vest top ( barely covered bra) so I gently suggested something different.😮
We had a coffee and a chat then shopping and home. DHs chest was tight again so he took spray when back.
The heat isn't suiting his condition- so hot car registered 29 deg.

Hope everyone has been OK today and managed not to cook( literally and otherwise)
Love to all.

nadateturbe Oh dear, hope things improve for you soon.

SweetpeaSue Perhaps your husband couldn't face the hours of sitting at A&E, and who could blame him (especially in this heat)? If he gets much worse, he might be persuaded to go (but I hope he won't need to).

Wyllow3 I love Amazon and buy a lot of stuff from there - cat food, cat biscuits, cat litter, all in bulk (can't let Jaffa go without ). Did you buy anything tasty from the shop?

It's very warm and humid. Went to the Arnold carnival (our local town), where there were lots of stalls, crafts, food vendors and various live music acts. Met up with Son2 and his family. They've gone on to another event to see friends, leaving us with Little Girl (she's asleep, thankfully). Back later x