Black Dogs 27

Scaredycat it’s been dreadful weather here. Have you been out at all. I got cold today. The fair was inside but it was still very cold. I think the chill might be affecting my back.

HVDY our craft fair turned out to be more of a Christmas fair. No so much craft but lots of jewellery and Christmas ornaments. I bought a couple of things but it wasn’t very good. It made a day out for me and my friends and we had lunch later then went to visit the local parish church which was beautiful. Weather was dreadful though. Very muddy and wet. Did you get your present wrapping done?
Well Britains got Talent better watch out Sweetpeasue . You could be their first sprout juggler 🤣. I too hope your Dh gets a date soon. It can’t go on much longer surely.
Wyllow I’m sure your sister was correct in what she wrote, this needs to be dealt with properly. Hope your knee gets better soon. My back is still causing trouble now and then.
Sounds as though your Tv hasn’t been properly set up. Hope you get it sorted soon.
nadateturbe thank you. Yes it is nice to have someone to confide in. I don’t tell my family when I’m sad because I’m sad all the time and I don’t want to upset them. The hospice is a comforting place for me. I will be there tomorrow night for a memorial service. They have one every year. It’s outside and we all light candles. It’s very beautiful. Hope you get to the craft fair and find some presents.

My nativity....look at the gifts from the wise men

Just a quick hello and welcome to Crepescule.
I hope you find the group helpful. They are all lovely caring people.
EllieAnne how are you?

Wyllow3 I don't know which is more annoying the TV or the Quaker attitude.
I googled and you have done all you can to fix the TV. I hope someone comes out today, or tells you how to fix over the phone. Everything is so complicated now.
I can understand you waking in the middle of the night. Your group needs to take the reporting and dealing with the incident seriously, not just for you, but for women in general.
But please try not to think about it too much.
I hope your knee is less painful and doesn't stop you getting to the hairdresser. It always makes you feel better getting your hair done.

Heavy rain two days in a row HVDY! The darkness is miserable too. Thankfully 22nd December isn't far off. Oh well, at least you'll get some wrapping done. And hopefully some visitors.
I agree about NYE. Don't like it.
But it must be particularly sad for you and your DH. Time is strange, its hard to believe so much time has passed since you last saw someone when often it seems so recent..

My granny lived in a terrace with outside toilet. I remember cold mornings running out in my nightie and bare feet.
I hope you enjoy your relaxed day and don't get bored.

Sweetpeasue I hope your husbands hand is better today.
I loved ice skating. I used to go alone because no one else would go. And I took the children rollerskating, as much for me as them! I too remember 2balls. We did upsy over and dashy variations, whilst singing upsy Mrs Brown. (Maybe that all sounds a bit strange). Maybe you could put balls on your Christmas wishlist.

You don't sound moany at. You shouldn't ever think you can't say how you feel here. It helps to share, and you are having a very stressful time. And yet you still manage to be interested in and chat to others. I keep praying for you. And of course your own experience will affect how you feel, but as Scaredycat said I'm sure the consultant will do his best.
Fluffball sounds good company. I've missed something, is Fluffball not your pet?

I've had a really good week. I've managed to get out for a coffee on Monday, art Wednesday, and to our local shops yesterday, not long outings but still...
It's nice how people understand M.E. my family don't.

SweetpeaSue I remember playing 2 balls against a wall. We lived in a terraced house until I was 11 - no bathroom (outside toilet), carpets (lino, central heating, etc. My friend (she's now a Facebook friend) and I loved that game. Fancy doing it with sprouts . Your grandson will be impressed and amused. Not a good day, weatherwise, again - it's raining here and really dark. Fingers crossed your husband gets a date very soon.
Wyllow3 That's disappointing about your TV. Hope Curry's will be able to sort it out quickly. Have you got a support bandage on your knee? Hope you have a good chat with your nie hairdresser. Are you having a trim?
nadateturbe 74 isn't old. My brother is 78 (he's the eldest, I'm the youngest, of 4 children). I don't like NYE. It's an anticlimax, I think. Also, my husband's dad died on NYE, 30 years ago (where do all those years go?) Hope you get somethig suitable at the craft fair.

Heavy rain here, so I'm going to faffa about at home - probably wrap the presents I've bought so far, and perhaps we'll see Son1 and his girls later. Hope everyone has a decent day x

Sorry I can't write anymore. Talk tomorrow.
Hope you all have a peaceful night.xx

Doodle I'm glad your back pain went quickly. It's so easy to twist something or make a wrong movement.
I hope you feeling OK. I've just been catching up on your posts. It's nice that you go to the hospice and meet with others who can empathise with you. You can never get over losing the person you shared your life with. Its good to be able to share your feelings with those ladies and support each other.
New Year must be a sad time for you, remembering your dear brother. Its so sad to watch someone you love changing with dementia. I don't like NY eve, I go to bed early.
There's not a big gap in our ages. Sometimes I find it hard to believe I'm 74. When I'm with friends having fun I don't feel old.
I'm going to a craft fair (hopefully!) tomorrow too- hoping to get Christmas presents for my son and his wife, difficult to buy for.
I hope you enjoy yours, and find something nice to buy.

Huh, so much for the new TV.
Managed to get ready to relax after earlier yet another hitch.

The sound "Went" tonight. I googled and did the simple things (checking the settings, re booting, et al).

I might have to "reset to factory settings" and it's all too much. I have just printed out all the relevant documents to phone Curry's, and the TV makers Hisense tomorrow. I've only had it for 30 hours - of course it's just possible it wasnt set up right by the curry man.

The earlier hitch was the hitch that a couple of the Quaker Servants of the meeting tired to initially persuade me that the attack on me shouldn't get reported in the annual report of our meeting.

So I woke up in the night feeling Cancelled.

I rung my sis and thought about it and it's totally unacceptable. ....she formulated a great couple of sentences about appropriate reporting of events in organisations generally.

.....and not "for my sake", but because it was the right and proper thing to do.

But one of the women concerned did listen and formulated a short report which did cover it more than appropriately. Without revealing names, or when, in the year. (as its still with the police at a low level)

I realised that some, even the Safeguarding officer, was trying to keep it "in house" - not to go via the police.
It really struck me, although it explains a lot of the difficulties I've had, as bad as the incident itself as its a group I have a strong emotional and spiritual connection to.

It's so wrong. ....the remarks eventually written for the annual report actually now recognises that we Quakers have to deal with this unwillingness to deal with it within the law, not sweep under the carpet.

Apart from anything else, what does this say about us in terms of supporting women generally?

The huge gap between what we say in our writings - (respect, in relationships, including sexual ones, and specifically that men shouldn't be abusive to women)

.....and in practice. I keep feeling I have to revisit battles.

Well, I'll have a chance to talk about it to the RJ women.

Not the day I'd planned. I did get to the shop and for a Costa but my usual energy is fading with sheer exhaustion of all this Stuff.

Sorry for not mentioning others, I'm just so tired, but see my lovely hairdresser tomorrow. My knee is still bad, I cant bend it without hurting but I've got a grip what is wrong (some Caretelidge damage, which isnt uncommon for sports injuries - caused by a bad sudden twist of the knee and know what to do.

Wyllow Hope your knee isn't too bad today. You certainly seem to know how to care for it and how to manage things to do with your body. I dont know anyone that can do a headstand either!
How's the new telly going?
HVDY We have a B&M on the outskirts of our village. There's not much they dont have though Ive not been to the larger stores like the one you mentioned. Thanks for your support.
Fluffball has a favourite toy though shed pick up a sock if she thought you wanted it and make off with it.
Scaredycat I thought it was funny too the way you snuck things into the cinema. I believe one of my sons does that too. Ridiculous prices of snacks inside. Ive not been to cinema for a long time since I saw Avatar with my son. Dont think the seats were posh though.
Your friend is very brave. Makes me realise how much there is to be thankful for.
Nadateturbe Im so sorry that your brother died on Christmas day. What an awful shock it must have been for yourself and family.
Oh you have been very fit and active yourself- jogging before work, ice - skating too , I'd have loved to have learnt that. I can see how very hard it must be that you're so restricted physically now with the ME. I do hope that something comes out of the latest research that will help.
Doodle So glad your back is feeling better-- ( crossed fingers stays that way)
Im sure it will have been so hard watching your brother's condition worsen. DHs father died with Dementia.
Thankyou for your reasoning about my 'misery posts' -- Hope the forecast is good for the craft fair- unless its inside of course.
On a brighter note, Ive been honing a childhood skill. Remember 2sy ball against a wall. I used to juggle with them and found you can do the same with sprouts! Yes, honestly. DH doesn't seem amused though as they bounce of the light fittings and shelves. Think my DGS will be impressed though.
EllieAnne Not heard from you for a little while. Hoping things are OK for you.
LeCrepescule Hoping youve been OK today and are coping alright.

Had Fluffball today but heavy rain curtailed our little walk.
DH couldn't bend fingers of his left hand all day. Think arm/hand getting worse. Hope we get date for procedure soon.

Love to all BDs and those not mentioned. X

Scaredycat The cinema sounds great. Son1 has got one near him, and he's been with his girls a few times. Sandwiches and chocolate biscuits are so much better than the popcorn cinemas sell. Your friend must love seeing you. You're such a lovely, positive lady.
nadateturbe What tragic thing to happen. Your poor mum. You were very active, doing all those sports. I might be a bit younger than you, but I'm definitely not wee .
Doodle I'm glad your back feels less painful. Do you usually buy things at craft fairs? Some people are so artistic and talented, aren't they?
LaCrepescule, EllieAnne and others - how are you?
Wyllow3 How's your knee?

Not been out today - it absolutely poured for a couple of hours this afternoon. x

Evening all. Thanks for your concern. My back is better now. Must have moved awkwardly or something that set it off.
nadateturbe. My brother died on New Years Day. Glad he got to see the new year in though he had dementia and didn’t know.
HVDY I suppose cats and bits of paper a have the same fascination as cardboard boxes for young children. Pleased to hear Jaffa has improved.
Scaredycat I recently had my fist visit to the cinema in years, I was amazed at the reclining seats so comfy and the cup holder and table. I struggled to stay awake🤣
Nice you got to visit your friend. I bet she was pleased to see you. Thank you yes my hot water bottle helped. I have some ibuprofen gel but must admit I forgot all about it till you mentioned Deep Heat,
Nadateturbe you’re a wee thing too. I’m 76.!
Yes you’re right ME is a dreadful thing. Being taken more seriously now though I think.
Wyllow sorry to hear your knee is playing up again. Hopefully your exercise routine will help. Have you plans for the weekend?
Sweetpeasue if you remember correctly, my posts following the loss of my darling man were honest and miserable (and still are often) it’s how we feel. Shouldn’t pretend on this thread otherwise it will make people believe they can’t say how it is, with all you’ve been through recently you are bound to be down. Hopefully some good news will come your way soon.

I’m going to a craft fair tomorrow. Not been before so looking forward to it.

HVDY you're just a wee young thing! I'm 74. I don't even remember listening to punk.
I did a quick recce of the HUGE B&M store. It's amazing, although I do think it might affect our local shops. I think it would take hours to get round it, just as well they have a cafe.
I was sorry to hear about your friends daughter. Poor lady, such a limited life. I hope she has some understanding friends and isn't always alone. Its terrible how M.E. sufferers are neglected. And we are only now getting recognition and properly funded research, partly due to long Covid.

Scaredycat you made me laugh, sneaking all that in. 🤣. Cinema is very changed. I was able go to see Downton because of the nice recliner seats.
You're such a caring person going to see your friend afterwards, and yes, she sounds very brave indeed. I'm sure she appreciates all your company.
It was sad, my brother was expected at mums for Christmas Dinner and didn't arrive. He died very suddenly of a heart attack. Its a long story but I'm a great believer and I feel God knew best.
I am very in awe of Wyllow3s fitness! I too remember jogging before work, cycling after, ice skating, trampolining- at age 50! hillwalking. I feel like saying to younger people, I was like you lol. But aren't we lucky to have done those things. Many folk never have the opportunity or the health. Must count our blessings.

Hi all
HVDY- The cinema has changed so much now. It’s lovely with reclining seats and little side tables with drinks holes.
Ah Jaffa is such a good boy . Don’t know how our 2 will be at the vets. Hopefully not for a while yet.
That sounds like a typical B and M visit - it’s like Aladdin’s cave isn’t it. It’s impossible to come out empty handed!!
Nadateturbe- we snuck in drinks,M and S sandwiches and chocolate biscuits.😀
We popped in to see my friend after shopping. We,d picked up a parcel and a couple of things from the food hall for her.. She’s absolutely exhausted but never ever a misery. She’s like you a very brave ,lovely lady.
I,m so sorry you lost your brother on Christmas Day - what a dreadful thing to happen for your family.
SweetPeaSue- the trauma you suffered in the past colours your thinking so much and who could blame you. But I,m sure the consultant will have got together a first class team to help your DH. If possible try and rest and have faith that they will do their best for him.
Doodle- hope today your back is feeling less painful and that your sleep wasn’t disturbed too much by it. Hotties are lovely and comforting aren’t they. What about Deep Heat.
It doesn’t take much to annoy our backs as we get older does it.
Wyllow- hope you knee gets better soon- you certainly have a good knowledge of physical injuries.
I can’t believe I ever leapt out of bed !! Come to that I can’t believe I skied,skated, hiked,cycled ,golfed etc. Use it or lose it has always been my motto but not so easy now😩Never mind just grateful to be able to do what I do. Enjoy your fitness as long as you can Wyllow.
EllieAnne - thinking of you as another weekend is upon us. Hope it’s not too stressful.
Candy- have you moved yet- if so hope you’re enjoying your new home.
LaCrepescule- Have you been able to have some moments without worry?
Allsorts- how are you today?

Love to all

Doodle I hope that after a night's rest and some painkillers, your pain will have eased off by the morning.
Wyllow3 The same to you, I hope your knee pain goes soon. These things can happen so easily.

Hope everyone has a restful night. Jaffa's livened up . He's got a box full of toys, but loves chasing a bit of scrunched-up paper around the kitchen. Love to all x

nadateturbe You losing a brother on Christmas day, of all days, must have been awful. I hate going around shops apart from B & M. There are so many nice things in there. I'm 66, but was about 17 when punk music was first on the scene. I still enjoy listening to it. I know someone whose daughter has got M.E. She's about 40, and hasn't been out of her house for about 10 years, other than for medical appointments. She's never been married or had children. It's such a debilitating condition, isn't it? I hope you'll have more better days than bad ones. Jaffa is so very well-behaved, doesn't ever make any fuss at the vet's or when having any treatments.
Wyllow3 Glad you're going to get the restorative justice.
SweetpeaSue It's no wonder you feel exhausted, after everything that's happened. Understandably, the procedure your husband needs is making you anxious. You suffered greatly when your operation went so wrong. The operation your DH is having must be done regularly, though, and I'm sure things will be fine. Rest as much as you can now, both of you.

Honest and miserable just fine in here. it's how you feel, and so understandable. but actually it's not actually miserable, Sweetpeasue, you've just told it like it is. And brain fog is totally natural.
Its possible the one who does the op is better than the consultant at that particular procedure, but it's understandable how the echoes come back, a degree of retraumatisation.

Aw Doodle, sometimes the smallest quick move can trigger something: I just really hope it clears up reasonably soon, whatever has been "twigged" isnt serious.
I hope a sign of that will be its no worse tomorrow, ie no sciatica.

(once one has got over that morning stiffness, its been a long time since I sprang out of bed!!!!!!!

My knee has been twigged, I think its a "Few days" job as long as I do loads so arnica and massage and dont exercise with any weight bearing bearing except for short walks.

Nadateturbe What a lovely post to me and so much appreciated. Im not sure about how my posts come over lately and I feel so very low that Im afraid they might be too honest and miserable. I really am so thankful for your words to me. You have made me feel cared about. Thankyou. I do hope you can get your own issues sorted about the anaemia through lack of iron. You can do without extra problems that affect your energy levels.

I'm afraid I didn't get chatting to everyone. Eye strain, brain overload, pathetic!
Hello to EllieAnne and La Crepescule.
Hopefully chat more tomorrow.
Goodnight everyone. I hope you have a peaceful one. xx

Doodle I hope your back eases, sometimes cold pack helps too, if heat isn't working.

Sweetpeasue it's perfectly understandable that you're exhausted, and have brain fog.
You and your DH are having such an awful stressful worrying time. And of course your own terrible experience will make you nervous about your husband's procedure. And not knowing how much of a risk it is. My heart goes out to you. I pray you don't have to wait too long and it goes well.
You did well making that long journey yesterday. Take it easy tomorrow. I hope you sleep well and feel rested in the morning. . Sending you big hugs.

Oh Doodle I hope you the pain wont give you a bad night. I wonder how its happened- sometimes it can just be a small wrong move . Sending you love and a hug.
Wyllow Thankyou for that link. I remember watching it first time round but well worth another look. Music is so powerful -- many Drs realise this now and it can help patients with Dememtia.