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Black Dogs 27
(1001 Posts)This is a continuation of Black Dogs 26, and you can read the end of it here
www.gransnet.com/forums/health/1349894-BLACK-DOG-26?msgid=31333735#31333735
Welcome to Black Dogs 27:
Its supporting those of us who wish to talk about our mental health problems quite deeply: and share aspects of our lives supportively, give and take support.
All are welcome: don't be put off by some of us being there long term, people do come and go. The last Black Dogs will give you a taste.
They didn't happened when were were kids that I recall Ellie Anne. Just Santa at posh stores.
I can understand LG wanting to hide. Smiling at enjoying toast and jam rather than seeing Santa.
Been exhausted and lurgy today. two weeks, I think it's a high % emotion worn out now. Main thing is to be able to get to family in the 28th
Anyway, pottered a bit, round the corner to the chemist, wrapped 3 pressies staying awake with some difficulty atm as the plumber is here mid plumbing - pipes lagged so they wont freeze this year, boiler done (its been 2.5 years!).
Wyllow3 I can't remember far back enough (memory is understandably affected), but I must have seen Santa somewhere when I was little. DH and I were saying how we only ever saw nuts (with nutcrackers), satsumas and chocolates at Christmas. Things were a treat then, something to look forward to - whereas nowadays, kids can have things all year round. Keep yourself as well as you can, so that you can enjoy time with your family.
Son2 and his little family just collected LG, and we exchanged presents. Seeing them all again on Boxing Day x
Yes, there was always a satsuma in the bottom of the stocking.
And nuts and the cracker, and a choc bar, and some bits and bobs.
The plumber came latish so had no sleep, but he's a nice bloke and had a natter and played some u tube golden oldies as he's into Credence Clearwater Revival and Led Zeppelin...All done
and ...well, Northern prices at the end, I was so relieved.
Currently, Curry's could come to collect the TV that broke down anytime tomorrow, then register for my refund - waiting for a text - hoping it wont come at afternoons snooze time.
But I did wrap up all the family pressies but one.
How are other BD's today? Doodle you were tired after yesterday.
I remember seeing Santa in a big shop.
And stockings with an apple and an orange and other odds and ends.
Dh and I don’t do presents. He’s bought me some awful things in the past.
And we don’t need anything.
I’m tempted by a purple furry cardigan in Morrisons but I’m waiting to see if they reduce it. They often do,
Noticed that they have free carrots for Rudolph!
HVDY your brother must be a deeply unhappy man. Has he always been the same? I know you’ve tried so hard with him over the years but you can’t help people who ont help themselves.
Poor little LG. Santa can be scary when you’re young. What a lovely afternoon with your family
Wyllow I don’t feel well either. It’s been a struggle to get things done today. Finally presents wrapped and sorted ready for taking with me when I visit the rest of the family.
Ellie Anne purple is Dhs favourite colour. I have lots of purple and lilac jumpers. I’d love a fluffy purple cardigan.
Sweetpeasue and Scaredycat hope you’ve had a good day. Are you finished getting ready for Christmas.?
I’m all done I think. Hoping I feel better soon I’m at church a lot on Christmas Eve so want to feel better by then.
Wyllow So hope you pick up . Crossed fingers Curry's pick up TV early tomorrow so you get an afternoon snooze in.
Doodle Hope you're not coming down with something - you must be so very tired after a very busy time. You must be relieved you're all sorted presentwise now.
EllieAnne You must have heard the poem about the woman who determined she was going to wear purple in her older life and do lots of other 'rebellious ' stuff. You go get that cardigan - its got your name on it.
HVDY Thankyou for those little photos- never heard of a Santa's Breakfast before. You are right , children have things all year now and dont have to wait for Christmas to indulge- a different world. Aww can imagine LG not being too keen on Santa.
Had a short 20min walk along the stray. V cold and grey. We both felt worse afterwards so just quiet cosy afternoon.
DHs arm/ hand the same.
Sister's MIL v ill in hospital now( she's 97) and caught the flu virus while there.
Hoping ScaredycatNadateturbe**Allsorts Candy* and others are coping ok with this run up to Christmas. Love to all. Xx
You've got so much done, Doodle, and its hard for you not to be busy, so its not easy for you to stop for a day.... but if you are coming down with something.... time for slowing down if you can..or you might not be up to all the family and church events..crossing fingers for you you pick up
Aw, do buy it now, Ellie Anne. Yes, it's frustrating if the price comes down, but if they all go - treat yourself..a bright furry treat.
I'm sorry you felt worse afterwards, *Sweetpeasue"...next time take a coffee and wrap up and just sit and look out to sea?
Not good for your sisters MiL, given her age, I'm really sorry to hear that, and that DH's hand isnt any better yet...
its 2 weeks into the lurgy but its not flu and I am sure its been the strain of the emotions so I'm not expecting a miracle.
Tomorrows TV collection is Ok time wise , 11 till 3, except I'd hope to go briefly to the gym but one nice thing is that my knee is a lot better than before I could kneel down so maybe a walk first thing instead.
Hoping all have the best night s possible.
Hi all
HVDY- DH friend lost his sweet 2nd wife 2 years ago after only 2yrs of marriage. That was very sad but he was one of life’s copers and was doing well. His,poor,family though have had so much.
Your brother is a case- but you have enough to do and have tried so hard to help him.
Don’t blame LG for not liking Santa - I,ve always found them a bit creepy. It did look a,pretty venue though.
My DC used to call Satsumas “Christmas Oranges” cos it was the only time we had them.
SweetPeaSue- so sorry your DH still has bad pain. Maybe it will gradually lessen but it does seem it would have been better if he,d had the procedure done sooner.
Even though you bough didn’t feel too good feet your walk the fresh air will have done you good. It always feels nice to get back in a cosy house after a chilly walk.
Wyllow- that person sounds a nasty piece of work- I agree it was malicious and thoughtless. Why do some people revel in being unkind.
Well done for the wrapping. I hve 3 more to do and keep putting it off as they are large clothing items😩
So hope you feel better by 28th you must be so looking forward to it.
Hope Curry’s are on time tomorrow and you are able to get a little,walk in beforehand. Glad to hear your knee is improving.
Doodle- you,ve got a bit run down I think. Have a rest now you,ve done all the wrapping etc Then you can enjoy Church nd all the other Christmas get togethers.
EllieAnne- Go for the Cardigan. It sounds fun and you might miss it if you wait.You deserve a treat.
Love to all mentioned or missingxxx
Wyllow3 My Son1 (44) likes Creedence Clearwater Revival. Glad the TV is being picked up early so that you can have a lie-in. Good job your knee is feeling better.
EllieAnne My DH and I don't buy each other anything for Christmas or birthdays - I treat myself whenever I like. Get the cardigan, if you want it.
Doodle Yes, he's always been the same. He says he liked Christmas when his two sons (from his first wife) were little; he enjoyed Christmas. He's his own worst enemy, really. You've been very busy. Try to rest a bit before Christmas Eve. Hope you feel better soon.
SweetpeaSue It's been a grey day, hasn't it? Misty, too. Sorry your DH's hand/arm isn't improving yet, but hopefully it will soon. Your sister's MIL is a big age. Older people do pick these things up easily.
I'm tired today, so going to bed soon. Hope everyone has a restful night x
I had a very grim night mood and lurgy wise. when I eventually got up and made a coffee, I realised that I was scared the lurgy wouldn't get better
I depend, to keep a reasonable mood, on going out to the Gym and Costa and chatting to people and not feeling ill all the time...
and in 5 days time I'm due to be driving 3 hours to the family, and it means sleeping in the playroom, not the most restful spot in the house 🤣...
- after whats been happening to me recently, I'm at very low ebb, easily affected mentally, and I am of course concerned, its having a physical backlash that will in is turn make me crash.
As its day 17 of the Lurgy I rung the GP and got a text back directing me to a respiratory clinic across the city that I just couldn't cope with getting to - at 8pm at night as well.
So I rung again and explained about my MH difficulty getting to strange places further afield than even town and that I have no family or someone else to take me: they kindly fitted me in today at just after 4pm.
I need to share my fears of it being a permanent CFS and will explain the stress I've been under.
Meanwhile the "will Curry's come and collect my TV today" (and me get £800 back!!) isn't looking good. given their time slot....(I've a mind to leave it outside the house...)
I'm not big into "blaming"...but MrA...say no more The nights when it comes back 😡
A very nice young Doc gave me 20 minutes. He couldn't find an infection, we agreed it was stress related, CFS. Come back in a fortnight if I want. It felt better for talking to him.
No show on Currys.
Wyllow Hope your 4pm appt was useful and you have some suggestions of ridding yourself of your particular lurgy- so much going round. You've been affected by the Mr A assault mentally , emotionally and physically. I dont know what to say but its important you're not set back - youve been doing so well.
HVDY Another grey day here. Went to Tescos and it was a nightmare. No more going shopping now. I hope you're right about DHs arm but Ive never seen anything like this. The lack of blood flow for so long seems to have resulted in an arm and hand that is almost a useless limb as when he moves its so painful and his hand is like a stiff claw where bending fingers is so painful and 2 fingers often wont straighten at all. Im appalled at whats happened.
Scaredycat Your DHs friend has had such bad luck in life and its so unfair it has been cut short like that.
My goodness I dont know how you cope with so much present wrapping yo do for your lovely large family.
*Doodle I hope you're feeling a little better today. When we went to Tescos today there was a choir singing Carol's- so hard to keep tears back but such a change from the clash and dash there was out there.
Hoping g everyone's day has been OK. Thinking of you EllieAnne* Nadateturbe and other BDs. X
Wyllow3 Glad you managed to see a doctor ok and that there's no infection (I expect you've got/had a virus). What about your refund, though??
A lazy day today - changed the beds, did the washing, lounged about. DH out with Son1 this evening. Got an Iceland shop arriving tomorrow morning, so we'll see how much turns up...
Evening all.
Quick message tonight. I’m still feeling under the weather and been sneezing a bit. Just had my dinner and paracetamol. Going to be d to se eir that helps.
Sweetpeasue sorry about your sisters MIl. So many people unwell with colds flu etc. Sorry you DH arm and hand are still painful. At least you know the blood is flowing now. Might take a while for nerves to heal and re grow.
Wyllow sorry you’ve had so much trouble with your TV. Hope it’s collected in time and your new one is more reliable.
Scaredycat I’m all done now I think. Hope so as I don’t really feel like doing much at the moment. Could you put the large items in a bag and put tissue paper over them to save wrapping in paper.
HVDY I didn’t realise your brother had been married before. As he different then. He seems quite unsociable now.
Hope you’re all ready for Christmas, I bet all your DGDs are looking forward to it.
Wyllow in a way I’m like you. I rely on going out and doing things to keep me going. Hope you feel better soon.stress can cause lots of problems but you know how to deal with this. You know what you need to do. Concentrate on your family and ty and avoid thinking of Mr A until after you’ve been with your family.
Ellie Anne have you bought that cardigan yet?
Oh yes, the cardi!
Doodle now enough is done can you take it easy tomorrow until the evening services? You have worked so hard. Yes, I really do need to go out especially to the gym and include that bit of yoga. On and off over the years it has helped me MH wise too. But yes - its like your church in that I've known people going back years, familiar friendly faces.
Oh Sweetpeasue it must be so hard - and puzzling - to see DH struggle with his hand. Ginormas hug!
One thing after another for you since I have known you on here. Any chance of you having your canine friend for cuddles over soon? What are you actually doing over Christmas?
A lazy day sounds goods there HVDY, its going to be a busy time for you ahead, I imagine!
I am going to have to hassle Curry's tomorrow I'm afraid. ^they took 10 days* to organise today's pick up that never happened. (there were crossed wires). Phone lines are pretty blocked too. Grrr.
Its quite likely I wont make family as its only 5 days now and its very, very full on,
*but I have a birthday visit arranged as well in just 3 and a half weeks I see on my calendar so its not the end of the world. It's very very demanding to stay as well as the 3 hour drive, no go till I pick up a bit.
Hoping to see more BD's in tomorrow, but I will be around on Christmas Day , I doubt I'll be the only one to escape into GN a bit. 
Afraid I have not wanted to do Christmas, presents been such an effort and a chore and very stressful. Next year everyone is having vouchers as now its impossible buying for adult grandchildren and their parents, all so different. Its so much harder when you feel low anyway.
To all struggling, I hope you enjoy Christmas and you are well.
So nice to read your kind message, Allsorts. I'm sure it voices the feelings of many BD's whoever they are.
Best wishes back at you. I'll be in tomorrow to wave back at anyone who comes in
I've disentangled the Curry's mystery as got straight through just now and a nice apologetic bloke
.
I'd rung them last night long, long after they were due, but could not get through the line was constantly engaged.
Meanwhile they rung me long after they were due as they were completing a list, and the line being engaged......they apparently wont call at your house unless you pick up, so they didnt come by.
Its rearranged for Saturday and I shall be glued to the phone in the given time slot.
Today has no "must do's" and will slob around (as I will tomorrow except if its sunny maybe a short walk in the park dodging the new bikes and other hazardous gifts).
Hi all
HVDY- I,m waiting like you but for Tescos!! Hope yours is on time and they have everything you,ve ordered.
I hope you and your lovely family have the best of Christmasses and that includes Jaffa!!
Still haven’t wrapped those remaining presents - better get my self moving soon!!
SweetPeaSue- Tesco’s was certainly manic yesterday here too. I only went in for wound dressings as I managed to catch my paper thin skin on the door catch for the millionth time!! Result - a triangle flap of skin and a bit of bleeding. Just need it covered as woolly jumpers and cat whiskers don’t mix with blood😻
Your poor DH. You describe very well how his arm and hand are still so affected- yes it is appalling.
I hope you and DH have the best Xmas you can and are able to see family and Fluffball too.
Doodle- I do hope you feel better today and able to go to the evening service and enjoy all that Christmas means to you.
You keep us together all the year and are our special person.
Wishing you and your family a peaceful and enjoyable day tomorrow. I will be thinking of you.
Wyllow- glad you,ve got Curry’s sorted- hope,they are not so tardy giving you your refund.
Have a “kind to yourself” slobby day today.
Maybe you,ll feel up to it on the 28th but if not you have your birthday visit to look forward to. Yes if you do get out for your walk tomorrow watch out for renegade scooters and trikes.
Wishing you a day of peace and sending a Christmas hug for the massive progress you have made this year.
Allsorts- I hope you manage to enjoy tomorrow whatever you will be doing. It’s a difficult time when you are down but hope you have some happy moments. Many Xmas wishes to you and keep coming in whenever you can.
EllieAnne- Are you wearing that Cardi?
So hope your Christmas is one you can enjoy. You will have your family with you- be glad. Your GC will be happy to see you too.
Love to all BDs . Those who are regulars, the friends we see when they are able and those who maybe read and don’t feel so alone. Sending Christmas wishes to all and hope for a while your troubles have a sprinkle of Xmas light.
That is a beautiful end paragraph, Scaredycat. Full of wisdom for us all. I hope your Christmas is everything you can have thats good and positive amidst current sadnesses.
This little thread has been so supportive for all of us here and indeed I do hope others read.
I'm flumping now with lots of music and thoughts about this year gone by.
Although I feel fluey, and exhausted, most of all I am grateful that it's that, and I haven't gone back into the depression I emerged from in late June
Sadness/Memories about Ex. That he wasn't, and isn't, prepared or maybe it's more "Able" to look back and count the good things.
It was after all 11 years of my life! With many wonderful as well as dreadful moments in the end part.
But it's also a sad example of how severe MH stuff can wreck his own as well as other's lives when it is not admitted to - or treated.
I did try, as I tried to find out about his mums last months and a funeral to say goodbye.
Reflecting how difficult it is for me and many who come in find it difficult to be kind to ourselves
and that its OK to speak out our worst times as well as celebrate whats good.
Thats partly what you are trying to tell us, Scardeycat.
Lessons learnt here - a good listening and support is often better than advice, although at times, some pointed advice has been spot on.
I was just looking back at past Black Dogs and our care for each other
Its quite remarkable.
Allsorts Your post could have been mine for many years. Not this year though. Glad to see you in and returning your wishes for a nice Christmas , thankyou. Oh I do share your thoughts about giving presents and the difficulties.
Scaredycat What a truly lovely post to everyone ,thankyou. Oooh hope that hand wound is healing. Isn't it strange that we seem to repeat injuries with the same things around the house. Im always knocking my shins against the coffee table corners.Yes, we will see Fluffball tomorrow at my son's house for dinner.
HVDY Hoping all your Iceland order turned up as expected. You have done things the right way and avoided the supermarkets!
Wyllow I share your thoughts about this thread and how supportive BDs have been to each other. Im grateful for the many ears who have listened to me 'telling it how it is'. Im afraid Ive had lots to say ( you're right ,the last few yrs have been very challenging)
I hope youve got Curry's sorted( we've had bad service in past from them). Its a shame youll not be able to go to your son's as expected but youll enjoy your visit later much better when you're not feeling ill. Have a nice day doing whatever you want tomorrow a d ,wow, that ginormous hug was special.
Doodle You're a special lady and like Scaredycat we all appreciate you posts and keeping this thread going. I do hope you're feeling a little better today- I know how much you need to be with others. I'll be at my son's for a few hrs tomorrow ( his DMIL has terminal cancer and has found a hospice and friends there) She will be there for dinner but its so very sad.
EllieAnne Hope you got the Cardi. If not it might be reduced after Boxing Day sales. Take care.
Nadateturbe Thinking of you and hoping you have the nicest Christmas possible.
Sorry if Ive been a moaning Minnie this year and thankyou for listening. Ive not idea what next year will bring but we all need to keep a grasp of hope . My mum used to listen to Jim Reeves and loved the 'Wispering Hope' song.
Hope all have a peaceful night.x
Doodle Brother was married for 23 years before. They had 2 sons (one is 58 now, the other was 54 when he died 18 months ago). She left him for another man. He's always been unsociable. Hope you feel better today.
Allsorts It's always difficult to know what to buy people, isn't it. Hope you have as nice a Christmas as possible.
ScaredyCat What a very nice thread to us all. My Iceland delivery missed out 2 things, so DH got those from Asda. Jaffa has already opened his presents from Son2 - and ignored them. Catnip toys. He's only interested in food! I hope your hand is better soon.
Wyllow3 We all care about each other, don't we? It's like a little family. Hope Curry's people turn up on Saturday and that you get the refund shortly.
SweetpeaSue You haven't moaned, you've been worried and have shared things here. We've all done that. It's a kind thread. Sad about your DIL's mum. The best hope is that she's kept pain-free.
Not feeling well - at 9.15 last night, I suddenly felt nauseous. I had awful D&V until midnight, then D several times throughout the night. I hadn't had any cooked food since Monday. Only water and tea all day today, but still got horrible stomach cramps so went to sleep for 2 hours (Missed Son1's visit). Hope I'll be ok tomorrow - to go to the Indian restaurant! Love to all x
Ds 2 and family were here today . We did presents because we won’t see them tomorrow. Little dgs is very excited and demanding. It was good to see them but a bit of a strain.
Will see the others tomorrow.im making profiteroles.
Haven’t bought the cardi (yet) . I’ve spent a lot this year. I was given cat Steven’s autobiography , maybe I once said that I like him. I’ll have a read of it anyway.
Gong to finish off the Asti Spumante staarted at lunchtime and watch tv tonight.
It’s been busy and I’m quite tired.
Hope everyone has a good day tomorrow.🎄🎄🎄
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