Constant bugs caught from Grandchildren

I had to do this several years ago. My late husband had become extremely vulnerable to infection and I had to draw the line. I can’t say it was easy as we missed out on so much. But luckily our family was very understanding. It did affect our relationship simply because we were unable to see them as frequently because as you said the bugs were constantly being passed around the family. I do think you need to put your health first though because as you say you are not getting any younger and won’t always be able to bounce back from these infections. The one thing we did do though when DD had an emergency, we had our little grandson who was quite poorly and both myself and DH wore face masks and constantly washed our hands. Good luck finding a solution and hope your health improves

It is one of the hazards of being a grandparent. If you don’t want to give up completely just say you can’t have x if they have a tummy bug or bad cold, they should really be at home either mum or dad then. Modern life is complicated with both parents working but if you are ill all the time I think you are entitled to have some rules of your own.

We have been through this and we have had some pretty awful bugs but we soldiered on, however, since my DH became very ill earlier this year and I am now his carer we have to be very careful with regard to catching anything so don’t see as much of the GCs which we both miss but sadly both the family and ourselves realise this just the way it has to be.

Your immune system will not improve as you are agong ...but your GCs immune system should improve so they won't be susceptible to everything...that said, they will still be exposed to many many viruses and bacteria in an educational setting....so its a risk you need to consider

Fortunately my grandchildren seem pretty bomb proof themselves and rarely pick up bugs. I have looked after them at different stages during the last 14 years and I cannot say I have picked up any childhood illnesses from them but I rarely get ill anyway.

LOUISA1523

Your immune system will not improve as you are agong ...but your GCs immune system should improve so they won't be susceptible to everything...that said, they will still be exposed to many many viruses and bacteria in an educational setting....so its a risk you need to consider

This[dont know about the first few words].

When my gcs are about 18 months to 2 and a 1/2 years seems to be the worst time.

fwiw, one of my kids more or less had to take their child out of a nursery[partly through doctors' advice] as she got quite ill with all the bugs she picked up
She is now at a childminder's with 2 other children, and things are much better. Far less bugs.

rosie1959

Fortunately my grandchildren seem pretty bomb proof themselves and rarely pick up bugs. I have looked after them at different stages during the last 14 years and I cannot say I have picked up any childhood illnesses from them but I rarely get ill anyway.

Please tell us your tricks!

Only half kidding actually.
If you do have advice, please share?

fancythat

rosie1959

Fortunately my grandchildren seem pretty bomb proof themselves and rarely pick up bugs. I have looked after them at different stages during the last 14 years and I cannot say I have picked up any childhood illnesses from them but I rarely get ill anyway.

Please tell us your tricks!

Only half kidding actually.
If you do have advice, please share?

No tricks lol so can’t really offer any advice. My granddaughter did pick up the odd bugs when she first went to nursery but I didn’t pick them up from her. As I said I am rarely ill fortunately and visit the GP every 20 years or so. I did actually pick up Covid from my granddaughter ( I think but cannot be sure) but as neither of us were actually ill with it I had forgot about it. I have had Covid twice but only knew I actually had it by testing I felt fine.

@rosie1959 that sounds amazing, is it perhaps hereditary, do other family members also have very few illnesses.
Am afraid I always fall prey to colds/coughs in the winter or worse, and that has been since I was much younger.
A friend of ours has never had covid despite looking after GCs and mixing with people who later reported having it, her DH also got it but she never did and always tested to check.
I think people like this with extremely robust immune systems should be researched - am not saying you should sign up for studies Rosie btw - but it would help us understand how immunity works, and perhaps look at how genes can be engineered to prevent people being prone to getting ill.

My husband and myself have renamed our 3 yr old grandson Typhoid Mary.
He passes on every germ known to man (and women).

I retired before I wanted to because my grandson was at nursery and I spent a year with constant infections and knew I was not pulling my weight at work.
I went on providing the childcare my daughters needed for many more years. Each grandchild went through the same year of catching everything when they went to nursery and passing it on to me.

And when they start 'proper' school you have to brace yourself to go on the offensive against the inevitable Great Nit Army.

It costs a small fortune at the local pharmacy for anti‐nit preparations and nothing on this earth is more laborious (and dispiriting) than trying to banish the buggers with a fine tooth comb.

I work/ volunteer with preschool age and before that I was I. Healthcare so my immune system is pretty strong. I resent getting any of the bugs they share and thankfully don’t very often. However it was Covid that first came from one of these babies and struck me down way back then.

My 18 month old grandson is at nursery 2 days a week and I have him 2 days. He constantly has a cold or virus which I catch all the time, luckily I am fairly healthy so manage okay.
Unfortunately a few weeks ago I had my 5 year old granddaughter to stay, she wasn’t feeling well and I won’t go into details but she had worms! Apparently half her class has had them, she had to be treated so did all her family and me. I also had to boil wash all bedding and towels and disinfect everything.
Can’t wait for the nits to start, I remember the constant battle with my Daughter.

Thank you all so much, it's great to know I'm not alone in this. I am very worried about my DH right now, he's got asthma and has picked up the latest cold/flu and is exremely unwell. Over the 10 months I've been looking after GD, I've had Norovirus, tonsilitis twice, some weird diarhoea bug no one has ever heard of (I was tested), flu, colds, Covid, etc. A mask is a great idea if she doesn't think it's a joke to keep pulling it off. I snort a lot of First Defence and constantly wash my hands - but to no avail! I think we're going to "have a quiet word" with DS at some point. Thanks again. x

My GC are adopted so we don't know a lot about their family history, but they do seem to pick up chest infections all the time. They've been with us for well over four years now and it does seem to be improving a little, though most children do seem to have a lot of colds. Fortunately we're not prone to chest infections ourselves, though my husband has had a cold for seemingly months.
I remember that my own mother didn't like coming to stay with us if we had colds, and I'm starting to feel a little like that myself!

Take vitamin D supplements with K2! And zink too!
Take much more than the NHS recommend..
It takes a while for it to get into your system.
Personally I take over 4000 ui in the winter.
Get them from a reliable and tested source.
I order from British Supplements in Northern Ireland.

We have had to give up seeing great grandchildren because of the number of respiratory infections they bring home. I have to self isolate in the winter and this year I've started on preventative antibiotics but I'm still not willing to risk my health. I just get so ill, I'm almost admitted to hospital each winter and DH has to pick up the pieces and everything falls on him which is not fair. They are happy and have other relatives around them. We see them in the summer when schools are closed. That's just how it is.

Oh yes! This rang a big bell! From age 1-2yrs was awful. My grandson always had a cough and cold caught from nursery and I caught every one of them and Im susceptible to chest infections as a result, which would last for weeks and I felt awful. But I’d committed to one day a week so it was difficult as you dont want to let them down. But neither did I didn't retire to be ill all the time.
So now Ive said if he has a cough or cold, Im afraid we must stay away from each other. We have to consider our own wellbeing.

When I was providing soldiers and upper ranks of the OTAN (NATO) Military with English classes for their Superior Exams in order to move ranks, many had bad colds !

NOT pleasant.

So I understand this horrendous situation very well.

Have not had a cold in years !!!!!!!!!!!!

Multiple vitamins / lots of fresh fruits / eat healthy ..

Colds and Grandkids,

I do not see our´s often enough to catch a cold and it is usually during the late spring / summer.

One twin daughter and her hubs live close to the city centre of Amsterdam and the other is in the city centre of Zürich.

Each have a son and a daughter.

I’m not sure if it works or just coincidence but I use Vicks First Defence Spray (Boots do their own) after I get home from seeing the grandchildren/or on public transport and I haven’t had a cold for over a year now.
You’re supposed to use it at the first sign of a cold but I heard one of the TV doctors say you can use it as a preventative before you start one.
Bet I go down with one now!! 🤦

You do not say how old the children are. These constant colds, sore throats etc. seem to be a feature of crèche and nursery school life and children do become more resistant to the germs as they approach school age.

Why this has become such a problem is hard to say - I don't remember it as a feature of the 1970s, but the standard of cleaning was higher then in institutions than it is now and I was a school-teacher and like most school-teachers and GPs never caught more than one cold a winter.

But knowing this, does not help you, does it?

If your own health is suffering, you will need to draw a line and say you unfortunately only can have the children when they are well.

I do realise that this places their parents in a hard place, as neither crèche nor kindergarten, or later on school will accept a child who is ill, and parents have only very few days they can take off work in the course of a year.

But we have to be realistic about this. Your health matters to you, and should be equally important to your adult children, and no, I doubt your immune system will suddenly start coping with these germs.

Also, however much we love our grandchildren, they are not our responsibility but their parents'.

They shouldn’t send your grandchild to you if there’s a likely hood of her having something, you need to be protected as much as possible… mine only visit once a year from Canada and nine times out of ten my husband and myself get something, making us very happy to video call the rest of the year,
Will say they did cancel the trip when one had suspected flu …