Black Dogs 29

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I’m glad that Jaffa seems friendly towards the new arrival, HVDY. Yes, I bet you were both tired. Well done on the aqua aerobics. It’s definitely time for a declutter there, as someone might appreciate the books. Son 2’s stuff is a different matter, if it’s still in working order.

Sweetpeasue -now that was a nice day. Walking by a river is always very special. Did Fluffball want to go in? And it seems as if he is becoming more Costa-trained. Ooo, cuddly now. It got warm today more, did it for you, near the water?

Oh EllieAnneI think there are many who understand men like that. “Hail fellow well met” to the world, a nice chap - and rubbish at home to the family.
But so hard when everyone knows him/knew him as “that nice chap”.

What it does to the family - you - gives you like 2 versions that especially as a child the brain cant cope with.

Whats the reality? Can you trust your own perception as a child, when around you others “See’ only Mr Nice guy. And eroded your confidence, as you felt unlikely to be believed.

But we do here.

I do hope today was OK for you, Doodle. Hugs.

I feel more at peace tonight after a grim start. I have managed to write more or less what I wanted as a briefing for Friday morning meeting. After about 5 attempts. It’s getting run past my son and sis atm.

We’ll see what the accusing voice says to possibly guilty self as time goes on.

I went out to get some money to pay my gardener due this afternoon, and the hardware shop had some nice plants, so I had time to plonk myself down outside the cafe,I thought I’ll just sit quietly, at a table a lady was sitting at. But as soon as I sat down she launched into conversation 🤣.

She was nice, it was a general sort of chat, but isn’t life funny, as it perked me up. But still wobbly.

My gardener was as ever a real tonic and a laugh and at last I feel the garden is under control and not an ugly overwhelming patch. It didnt take much - lawns, big weeds out, and above all, the weed crowded patio. While she was here I wrote what I needed to at last, had a sleep, and have just gone to my regular Quaker Zoom.

Who knows what mood tomorrow will bring - or unexpected ladies in cafes. Plants, HVDY - pretty much the common bedding plants plus something bright and bold called "Indy".

Thinking of BD's in anguish or troubled right now. xx

SweetpeaSue I used to be with my children all day, every day, until Son1 went to nursery when he was 4, just in the afternoons. Yes, we've got a few trees around. The squirrels come every day. Aww, lovely Fluffball sounds like such a nice little dog. Having a dog can start a conversation with strangers in the same way that having a baby can.

EllieAnne Some people can manage to put on a front to give the impression that they're nice. Your dad did, by the sound of it. Has the weather been good where you are? I hope you're getting out and about.

Doodle Yes, she now understands pretend play and enjoys playing with toy farm sets as well. Have you been out today?

Wyllow3 Some of the books will be ok for LG, the rest can go to a charity shop, as they're all in good nick. Your garden is beautiful. I love the curved path.

DH out with Son1 this evening. I've been reading. I'll be glad to get the colposcopy over with tomorrow. Hope everyone has a restful night x

Wyllow your garden is beautiful. I’m so depressed about mine. I have a man to cut the grass but the rest is down to me. Lots of weeds and bushes needing cut back. I ve had words with Dh tonight because he booked his mot on the day I go to ds1 and is expecting me to bring him back from the garage before I go to ds1 . I like to go early because it’s an hour drive and I have a lot to do when I get there. Just wish I could have a day at home to rest.

Hi all
HVDY- I would complain on my nieces behalf but it’s not my place - very frustrating though the lack of Oomph!
Yes I,m angry too about my Sisters leg too. Totally the hospitals fault but again no Oomph.
No the boys are house cats. We live in the Main Street in our village and they wouldn’t last 5 minutes out there.
I still have my Son1 stuff in the Attic but it’s not in the way and he’s not very good at getting rid of things.
I hope,the colposcopy goes safely and is not too uncomfortable for you. You are such a brave and uncomplaining lady.
EllieAnne- your DH could take a taxi back . It’s not fair to put so much on you. In fact you have so much to do he could help you with.
Try not to work too hard at your Sons. Safe journey xx
Doodle- yes my sister gets her dressing changed regularly and last week had a specialist nurse . But it’s taking so long and impeding her recovery.
It’s Church for you today isn’t it- do you all have coffee fterwards?
Wyllow- I LOVE your garden- there must be fairies at the bottom of it! What a gorgeous place to,relax in now the work is nearly done. We have a little Ryobi patio weed thing that makes the job much easier - you might like it.
Don’t listen to that little accusing voice- you haven’t got a vindictive bone in your body- you did what was right.
Chance encounters - we always say that but it’s so true. It gives,you such a boost and now you are looking forward a/ bit which is brilliant.

Now off to have a hair cut so better get my nightie off!!
Love to allxxx

Will be in later but just wanted to wish luck to HVDY with the colposcopy and hoping it all goes smoothly. Hugs.xx

Hi HVDY how did it go? How are you? Xxx

Let’s be clear….. well there may be fairies at the end of the garden but let’s just say they are goose grass (That sticky stuff), nettles, brambles ivy and big couch grass fairies. Once it was like the rest, planted up. But it’s OK for now, is good enough, has taken away the feelings for now ‘I’ll have to move to McCarthy and Stone can’t cope on my own…(and the roof needs stuff too…)

EllieAnne you must be clear. DH can take a taxi. Just don’t let him pressure you.
Secondly, do what I do as regards the garden. A gardener will probably on my take a couple of hours with proper equipment to cut back and shape the bushes. Don’t let it get on top of you as it did me too. Look you do enough: set these little limits.
What can DH honestly do if you say, ‘take a taxi, I have to do x y Z
I know it’s hard to make a start on these apparently small ‘stand up for yourself’ but try?

Tut tut Scaredycat nightie girl (shhh, don’t tell anyone, I do it too)

Yesterday peace gone night from hell. I had to get out for a mini dentist visit so rushed and then went to gym. But I still feel as CC anguished and that tho ga are sort of hyper real till Friday meeting and I have to factor in there may not be a decision
Or it’s not one that is adequately fair.
DS. Gave me some feedback to alter my draft and the deadline to get it off is tomorrow lunch latest.

Psychologist too busy to help this week but will at least is updated.

I went to the gym, some good natters, t he en forced myself to come here tge park and glad I did as I was getting morbid and it’s sunny with a coffee and have walked (not walking enough).

Sorry spelling grammar, on the mobile x

EllieAnne Its not right your DH making appt with people, that he knows requires your help, yet doesnt ask you at all. Like Wyllow I think you do so much for everyone- you need to put yourself first sometimes. Let others get on with it.
HVDY I hope by now youve had colposcopy and everything is ok. You are certainly - as Scaredycat says- a very uncomplaining lady.
Scaredycat I own up to being a nightie person and dont get dressed immediately. In fact I like to get into my nightie early too and have an early bath. Hope you like your hair cut.
Wyllow Your garden is beautiful- youve worked very hard. I hope your back wasnt too bad after all that bending. Glad youve got that draft all written out so you can feel a bit at peace.
It was nice for you to have a chat with that lady over coffee- these random encounters with strangers and exchange of words can mean so much to others aswell as ourselves.
I really hope the decision made is in your favour and you can finally have some peace of mind without it hanging over you.
Doodle Yes, Fluffball is extremely cuddly. Pets do take up a lot of commitment I think, and I dont think we'd ever have a dog of our own for that reason. I guess we have the best of both worlds. Hope youve been OK today.

Book group this afternoon. Was a little boring tbh but Im not the only one whi isnt really interested in the book we're reading. We've all given suggestions for our next one , to read in September which will be voted on.
First warm day in a while- could summer now have started?

Hoping all have had a reasonable day. X

.

Sorry * Wyllow* I think my sentences got a bit mixed up in my post.

EllieAnne As others have said, tell your husband he'll need to get a taxi.

ScaredyCat Are you happy with your hairdo? I like pyjamas and love to sit about in them.

Wyllow3 Well done on going to the gym and park. It's muggy here and overcast.

SweetpeaSue What book are you reading at the book club? I started reading "Sonny Boy", by Al Pacino - his life story. It's very boring so I won't finish it.

It was very quick at the hospital - the lovely woman consultant chatted, then examined me (legs in stirrups - not nice) and said I haven't got anything to worry about, only vaginal atrophy (thinning of the skin) down there, common after the menopause. She's prescribed an eostrogen cream to apply every night for 2 weeks then twice weekly after that. I haven't got to go back, but will see my GP next week. Massively relieved. DH and I went for lunch at a country pub afterwards.

Great news HVDY- so pleased it’s over and no bad newsxx

So glad its over with for you* HVDY*
Great news. You must have looked forward to the treat of lunch out afterwards.
Our book at present is 'Diary of a Provincial Lady' by E.M. Detailed. Slightly amusing but too twee by half!

Book by E.M.Delafield. Grrr.

Thanks, both.

HVDY what a relief. I can understand the worry. Hope the treatment helps and you feel better soon. There are several threads on GN about vaginal atrophy if you want to know more.
How nice to celebrate with lunch out.
Sweetpeasue glad you went to book club but shame you’re not into the book. Would find it difficult to rest a book that held no interest for me. I read fiction mainly. Read a lot of Harlen Coben which I liked. Lee Child and James Patterson
Wyllow I do wish things at Quakers could be resolved soon. I don’t think all this hanging around is doing you any good.
Glad you managed to get out and walk a bit. I was reading about your gardener and your garden and remembering back to when you were so stressed about the garden and we were trying to talk you into having something done so you could sit out in it. You’ve come a long way since then
Scaredycat like your sisters leg, the problem with my DH’s foot was caused by the hospital. I have often thought of complains but to be honest I don’t think they really care, Hope your sisters leg improves soon.
I have a friend who has two house cats. I saw then Sunday, very tiny and very soft, a bit like miniature Siamese but with cotton wool as fur.
Ellie Anne could you pay someone to trim down your bushes if your Dh won’t do it. I think he could get a taxi back too. It’s not fair on you to have to drive him back and go to your sons.
Church for me today then coffe with friends this afternoon. Very nice.

Doodle Thanks. I haven't had any symptoms. It was only when the nice GP examined me (a couple of weeks ago, when I went about my bladder) that I was referred. Don't we women have things to deal with . Glad you had a nice afternoon. How's your wrist now?

HVDY I'm really glad it turned out to be as it was not something really nasty - and sorry you had to do that to get the end result!
But it must have been a real celebratory lunch..did you have curry?

Doodle - those are my go to thrillers too, have you tried David Balducci? Less gore than Cobden, more intelligent than Patterson. try the "Camel Club" series.
www.davidbaldacci.com/landing-page/david-baldacci-camel-club-series/

Jack Reacher/Lee Child of course is the go to hero who sorts all pretty finally and effectively!

what did you do at church, was it a group? and yes, how is your wrist?

I'm in the middle of trying to to write a final draft for Friday and really it's driving me crazy so will be glad to get it off, as trying to be fair/kind but assertive and clear.

Nigh night BD's

Wyllow3 Thanks. No, we went to a country pub where the food is all home-cooked (no microwave stuff). I had lasagne, he had beef stroganoff.

Hope you sorted out your final draft.

Hi all
Doodle- I like the Harlen Coben dramas on TV so I expect I,d enjoy the books too.
Ah I,remember your poor DH foot troubles. It’s so upsetting when it’s actually the hospitals fault and I understand more how you must have felt then. But it does see. There’s no point in complaining as everything has changed so much.
Glad you had a nice day yesterday.
HVDY- what a good thing that you had that ladder examination and the Dr was vigilant.
Yes who,d be a woman when it comes to bits that go wrong😩
Your lunch must have gone down a treat afterwards
SweetPeaSue- even the title of that book sounds a bit twee- not my cup of tea.
It’s really muggy here today - we walked to the pharmacy this morning to pick up our,prescriptions - what a surprise!! They werent ready so we have to go again tomorrow.
Wyllow- try not to stress too much over that final draft. If you,ve been kind and fair without being a pushover all should be OK. You need your head to be free of all that worry.
Is your brother coming soon?
I,m pleased with my haircut. Would love thick hair like yours . Mine is fair,fine and the total opposite of my Sister who got the thick dark hair of our parents!,

Love to all - missing some of our friends who we haven’t heard from in ages.
Hope you all enjoyed the game last night- what a great win.

Sorry HVDY you didn’t have a ladder examination!!!!!!

Draft finished after a long mornings work and am pretty happy with it, but not confident they can reach decisions tomorrow as there are pro MrA’s in that group who cannot see the big picture as they are friends. Yet they know the law, and our guidelines, and I have been far more clear than ever before about asking them to do their duty!
I don’t think I have ever had the courage before to take something like this so far.
I am sitting outside a cafe atm having escaped home and it’s not sunny but a warm breeze

And thinking how you ALl have supported me through this and am so so grateful xx

Back later

Wyllow Im sorry, my previous post was a bit premature about you having finished the draft . I really hope that it is received and given a full examination of all the facts and the way you have been treated throughout and how its left you niw. If you're truly happy with it ,and Im sure yku have written it eloquently and with all the detailed facts and consequences, I hope you can let your mind rest and know youve done absolutely all you can do. It sounds as if youve been very fair - which I hope all goes in your favour.
Its been warm today with a breeze and Im glad you managed to get out for that nice coffee. Just getting out of the house and watching people can make us feel better at times.
Scaredycat Oh dear- your pharmacy sounds a bit like ours! Yes, I thought the title was a little telling before I opened it. Ive put forward my next suggestion- Frankenstein- its a thoughtful book , not just like the films, so we'll see if its voted for. Just left Fluffball back home for my DIL to come home to. Had a little woodland walk with her this morning and cafe there. We went in and she did the same thing while were at the table, cringe!
Doodle I remember you weren't happy with your DHs foot in hospital. I know you did everything you could while your DH was there. Im afraid hospitals arent quite the places they used to be for older people. Of course its not the same for all but theres just not enough nurses and Drs- waiting for this, that and the other to be done .
Ive not read those authors you named though my DH used to like crime novels. Hes not in to reading at all at the moment, and to tell the truth ,Ive not been reading either ( apart from BC choices). Hope youve had a nice day today with friends.
HVDY Oh it must have been so good to wake up this morning without the examination hanging over you. Its been warm here though just started raining now. Glad we could take F out this morning. On the short drive there a baby squirrel ran out in front of us and just stopped there frozen- we braked and when I looked behind it wasnt there, phew!
Visited aunt this afternoon and sat in garden there - so difficult talking but managed . When we went inside we watched the staff having a game and some hilarity which made aunt and other residents smile. We took our leave in the midst while aunt was watching and she waved goodbye with no problem which is the first time thats happened. She still doesnt know where she is and earlier said she would come home with us.
EllieAnne Hope youve been OK today.

Hope everyone has a peaceful night.love to all and those not mentioned who arent in. X

It’s been heavy rain here today and it’s getting me down I’d planned to work in it today but not possible. So I sat in cafe for a while reading then tidied the linen cupboard. The forecast is not good for the next few days.

Scaredycat I don’t watch football but I gather it was a good game last night. Yes had a nice time at art but mostly because of the company rather than my talent 🤣 is it far to your pharmacy.? Ours is a 15 minute walk. Bit of a pain having to go back again tomorrow.
I must admit I read the ladder examination and was a bit puzzled as to what that involved. 🤣
Good job you mentioned your problems HvDY you’re right we do have a lot to put up with. Hope the treatment helps. Very unpleasant when you don’t feel right .
Wyllow yes I have tried David Balducci books when he first started publishing. I wasn’t as keen on them as some others. Maybe I should try again.
Wrist is fine actually thank you. Looks an absolute mess with blood and bruising all over my arm but it doesn’t actually hurt which is a plus, dressing off next week so hope they can clean it then. Right now I look like a bit of raw heat sealed meat so I cover it up.
Glad you’ve finished your final draft and hoe it gets your points across
Sweetpeasue I’m glad you had a pleasant visit with your aunt and could see that she was being looked after ok. It’s good for family and friends to visit people in homes. Keeps them on their toes. You read so many bad reports these days but some must be good.
Ellie Anne you must be so bored when the weather is bad. I really wish you had q hobby or something to do when it’s raining or cold.
I had a nice time at church. More cake !