Black Dog 30

Wyllow3 It's a pub we've been to frequently, and it was recently refurbished (so the prices have gone up). I had a home-made lasagne, DH had steak and ale pie. Lovely. My friend will probably get the START (community reablement) team to go to him when he's home. They provide a free, temporary service (up to 6 weeks). I worked for them, years ago.

EllieAnne fresh blood often comes from piles or small tears. If it's blood in faeces, that's a different matter. Still not nice, though. Baptised in the sea?? What will she be wearing - it's not exactly warm, is it? How much does your cat weigh? One of the cats at Son2's house is 16lb and looks very fat indeed. He manages to catch mice and birds, though. Jaffa is 10lb and just right. Your friend is quite insensitive and selfish, by the sound of it. Did your husband have his blood test done ok?

Been for my flu jab - about 30 people were standing outside the surgery, and lots more turned up. All done, now, so that's ok. Not doing much today - both sons are taking their children to the famous Goose Fair (it's been going 700 years). I gave them all some money for it, so hope they have a good time. Back later x

Evening all. Had a lovely morning in church decorating with flowers and vegetables. Looks very colourful with the autumnal colours. Went to the hospice for lunch then to a local craft store for supplies
Ellie Anne not so nice of your friend not to offer help. Does she have health problems that would make her keep away.
Glad your cat is ok. I do wish you had a good friend. Someone you could rely on. DH was mine and I miss him terribly. You deserve to have better people in your life.
Wyllow I love autumn. Always my favourite time of year. Well it used to be anyway. Love the colours and the bonfire smell of November. Have you seen your friend today?
Sweetpeasue when are you giving that beautiful knitting to the mum? You really are an excellent knitter. I couldn’t make anything half as good as that.
HvDY I was one told by an allergy specialist that i seemed so allergic to so many things they wondered if I was allergic to the needle that administered the test specimens.
Funny enough mackerel was the only fish I used to eat although I ill eat cod and chips if battered.
Pub lunch sounds nice
Scaredycat how are things going have you arrived yet?

Hi all

It’s been a busy 2 days yesterday was exhausting too as it took so long to get up to Newcastle with pick ups and stops etc. Today we are in Scotland and have just got to our 2nd hotel.
The Border Country was beautiful - so many lovely sheep,cows and horses and gorgeous scenery. Such a different holiday for us so not sure yet. But nice to meet new people - most of whom seem nice.
HVDY. Ah poor Jaffa - you are so kind and caring to him - just what he needs. We passed Nottingham and I thought of you.
Coped OK toilet wise so far so good- phew.
Lovely meal at the day centre for you- wish I liked Salmon.
Your friend is a fragile person - his wife must be very good with him as she has so much more to deal with.
Wyllow- don’t overthink you and A- you both like each other and accept each other warts and all. Just make sure you have time for yourself and take care of yourself too. The more you get to know each other the more comfortable you,ll both be.
Went past your neck of the woods too- did you see me wave😀
Doodle- I think it might be something you and your friend would enjoy. There are quite a lot of ladies together on our coach.
Harvest Festival is lovely- the colours and the sentiments too.
Glad you,ve had a nice walk
JamesandJon3- so glad to hear you,ve had a reassuring message. I hope you DGD gets peace of mind soon.
EllieAnne- HVDY is right about the blood - I can vouch for that too. A Sea Baptism must be a wonderful thing to witness- it,ll be a bit nippy though. I don’t think your friend was meaning to be unkind - maybe she’s just scared of getting poorly.
SweetPeaSue- your knitting is so beautiful - it’s perfect. The twins Mum will be over the moon with them.
Have the best holiday you can- one day at a time. It’s somewhere you both love so just let the beauty wash over you- and eat lots of nice food - hope your tummy settles

Love to all will be back in a day or two after the next trips.

Doodle I bet the Harvest Festival display looks beautiful. I love all these autumnal colours. I had some allergy tests done, years ago - they put 70 substances on my back, covered it over, then on the 3rd day the cover was taken off, and by day 5 welts appeared where the allergic reactions were. It didn't tell me anything I hadn't already worked out for myself.

ScaredyCat I love seeing animals out in the fields. That's where they should be. Glad you got there ok. Hope you have a lovely holiday - enjoy the scenery, sights and good food.

It's been sunny all day. Got lots of washing dry. Jaffa's been lounging about on a garden chair. Hope ALL BDers have a relaxing evening. x

My friend has lots of health problems and I wasn’t expecting any practical help but it was the tone of her message that upset me.anyway I’m recovering now. Eating a bit. And drinking lucozade. I don’t think I m infectious now. I know when the Dgc are sick they have to have 2 days off and I’ve had that so will probably get to church tomorrow.
Watching strictly. I keep having to look up who they are!

EllieAnne Glad you're feeling better- that sounded a really horrid bug.
Yes, Ive just finished watching Strictly. Ive always loved dancing. The celebrities this year are nowhere nearly as familiar, I agree.

Just thankyou so much for your kind words about my knitting. Im really nowhere near any professional standard ,honestly. Im just a beginner.

Well apologise for not addressing everyone. Been an exhausting day.
We arrived at house to find no key in the keypress! Tried calling letting company for half n hr but no answer. Had to travel to nearest letting agency( quite a big deal) and got it sorted out, drove back to cottage and waited for someone to come with key. Poor DH was really tired too.
Finally offloaded car and breathed sigh of relief to have beautiful and peaceful surroundings that are so special in this place.

Thinking of all those here who have come to mean so much to me and hoping you're all OK. * Nadateturbe* Thinking of you. X

We had a very pleasant afternoon at the Botanical Gardens including eating one of their 6 inch scones and decent coffee for it was a lovely October Day - people were sunbathing. It was busy but there are quiet parts where it's so peaceful.

Yes, I went with A, and found out more things about his life much needed if one is to relate closely - I mean it seemed odd to need to know how his wife died back in 2019 but needful? I share my past easily, but have not had that, and needed to be able to understand. And it happened just before Covid, and then he was alone a lot - well…I don’t need to say more except he learnt to survive?

And discussed me getting access to his son’s telephone in emergency and indeed vice versa, for of course....

I cannot easily count on my family for support, as DGD L is so very very disabled and my son and DiL struggle to fit it all in.

Just had a nice long chat with Son, and the hopes for this trial operation that will improve L’s condition are very high, no date yet.

The sun shone on the late flowers and trees changing colour. One of the many things I like at this time of year is the smell of woodsmoke: we did the “do you prefer autumn or spring” conversations: me….. after February this year, it has to be May for me.

That was a very nice meal, HVDY. Your friend certainly seems rather taking things for granted!
And its snap - for I also had my jabs this morning. All very efficient. Huge numbers and some very, very, elderly.

Yes, it was definitely warm enough for Jaffa to sun himself. But my washing only half dried.

I am glad you feel a tiny little better EllieAnne. It sounds like a really really horrible bug or condition. (Hugs sent).
I so wish you had someone friend wise who you felt comfortable with - do you still get on well with you fellow tea makers at church. That friend sounds rather a fair weather person.
Ah, another Strictly fan. It’s a really big thing isnt it, almost an Institution in itself, I bet it is streamed abroad as well. Indeed, the amount of looking up needed this year seems greater.

I had honestly not heard of a sea baptism but it makes a lot of sense.

A lovely morning indeed, Doodle. Autumnal colours and arrangements are really very special. Just knowing you went off for craft supplies means it will be lovely tomorrow. Now I find Mackerel an unusual choice, was it a childhood thing? I was brought up in Hull when it was a fishing HQ, loads of fish and chips cod and haddock.

I hope you start feeling better about the holiday Scaredycat. From where you live it’s certainly just a haul to get up there. And relieved - as you are - the toilet thing went OK. Yes, (she lied) of course I saw the wave as you past my way.

No need to worry about not addressing everyone, Sweetpeasue. That is disgraceful about the key! But the description of your surroundings - well seems really special, and may you have more lovely October days like this.

EllieAnne Whatever it was that caused your D&V, I'm glad it's cleared up now. Hope you get the chance to chat with people at church. I don't watch Strictly, but Josh Widdicombe seems like an odd choice as a presenter (I don't find him funny, either).

SweetpeaSue That was rather poor service, not having the key ready there. Just what you don't need, after a long journey. Hope you both slept ok and that you'll have some good days there.

Wyllow3 My friend appears to be revelling in all the attention he's getting - he sent me a photo of himself yesterday, with 2 nurses attending to him. Your friend A must have been very lonely after his wife died, particularly at the time of the Covid lockdowns, too. Nice that you had a long chat with your son. Fingers crossed his girl gets the operation that will improve her life.

Not up to much today, though I ought to visit my brother (although he makes no effort to see me or even ring). Hope ALL BDers manage to have a decent day x

Your brother always ends up chatting to you at length, HVDY. It's a side effect of his depression I guess to get stuck in the "no- one really cares (despite evidence) so I wont ask".
But you are doing right by him visiting - and I believe it helps tho he cannot see it.

Yes, after that conversation with DS it became clear just how important the operation is. I did not know but she has a condition called Lennox-Gastaut syndrome.

If you google it you will see that it means progressive dertioration, which I had not realised (I believed her fits tired her out so she could do less, but what happens is that the condition gradually becomes more and more drug resistant over time. Fingers and paws crossed, hey?

I do get on fine with the people at church but we are not close friends. I find that people in happy marriages don’t have so much time for friendship though there are exceptions on here.
I haven’t gone to church today. It felt like too much effort.
The baptism was lovely but the tide was really far out and they had to wade far out to get enough depth.
They just wear anything and get dried in the toilets after.
They were going to someone s house for hot drinks etc but I didn’t go .
Dh not good today. His foot is red and swollen and he keeps falling asleep.
I’m not sure if I should be doing anything about it but he doesn’t seem concerned. I really wish I had family about to ask for advice.

Yes, what really comes across is how little support you have,
EllieAnne.

Sigh, I think you might have to ring the doc in the morning. Just enter into the google search engine

"symptoms his foot is red and swollen and he keeps falling asleep"

T hey give some ideas xxx

EllieAnne I just realised that you can ring 111. You are concerned, dont know if it's serious, etc. You will be asked a number of questions ie an "Assessment" which is sent through to your GP unless they think you should do something sooner. (you then have a basis to ring GP.)

At least, it will be supportive and not leave you worrying alone on a Sunday x

Wyllow I sent a picture to my daughter a psychiatrist and she said to phone 111. On hold for ages but they are sending a dr. I said I could take him somewhere but wouldn’t feel safe getting him in and out of the car.
You are right I do feel isolated. Was meant to be going to a friends church this afternoon to hear a really good speaker.
And because he’s not mobile he is watching golf in the living room. I can’t stand sport so I’m in the bedroom waiting for the dr.
I can see my life shrinking to this room.

Dear EllieAnne

Being in your place has to be one of the hardest we might face, and of course, BD's understood why.
At. some point you may have an opportunity to tell professionals or share thoughts with other carers how you feel

I bet you are not the only one. xx

Please let us know what happens, and of course you will need to get out to coffee or anything when you can.

Is it any good chatting to DS and family? Even if you dont share much "news" they do care about you..just chatting "how are the DGC" is distracting you a bit.

I’ve had messages from my 2 d in laws today about other things so I’ve told them what’s going on.
Not a word from either son.
Dd was helpful but just messaged not chats.
No sign of dr yet.

Hi all
Just a quick hello. Our day has been another long one as we are travelling to a new place and hotel every day which is a lot of mileage. Even to a Castle and to John o Groats. Weather not great but we did everything .
EllieAnne - Hope the Dr turned up for DH and was able to help. See after yourself too.
HVDY- Hope you get to see your brother. You always have such good chats once you’re together.
SweetPeaSue- Hope you,ve settled in well now and feeling more at peace in that lovely place.
Wyllow- I so hope your DGD is able to have her Operation- it really is a distressing condition she has. Bless her x
Doodle- hope you,ve had a lovely Harvest Festival

Love to allxxx

It's good to hear from you, Scardeycat. It does seem a bit tough for you on this new sort of holiday to be on the move a lot (not quite my cuppa T?) not able to create a sort of "home base". Hoping there are some special photos for ou tp share when you come back.

I was so tired this morning! Partly my fault for staying up late (got a big high). But today I went to the gym which was nice - natters, and a stretch, (missed it, it's been since Tuesday properly, being there).

I've got cystitis again and was frustrated that if I were under 65, a chemist could prescribe! so thats the GP first thing, and I need to go to the dentist too pretty quickly, so thats tomorrow on the phone until I get somewhere. But I am enjoying catching up on Sewing Bee, I was well behind.

Oh Wyllow I’m so sorry you’ve got cystitis again. How awful for you. So uncomfortable.hope you get some meds soon. Could the Gp give you an emergency supply to keep at home?
Do hope something can be done to help your DGD.
Scaredycat not sure I could cope with all the packing and unpacking. Glad the scenery makes up for it. Hope you’re having a good time.
Ellie Anne I’m sorry you missed
HvDY harvest festival was lovely. Lunch was good too. 5 different soups and puddings to choose from. Mind you I helped with the washing up and there was loads.
Ellie Anne sorry you missed Your friends church trip. Hope the doctor has been by now. Good your DILs are contacting you. Your DH’s foot doesn’t sound good,
Sweetpeasue that’s really bad about the key. You and your poor Dh must have been exhausted by the time you got ill. Glad it’s a nice place though. Hope you both rest.

The dr came eventually and wanted to send him straight to hospital. Not a local one , the one that deals with vascular. But he phoned and there are no beds. So have to pack a ybag and wait for a phone call tonight or tomorrow. I really can’t cope with feet so I hadn’t seen it but it’s obviously infected and I don’t understand why he hasn’t been to the doctor about it.
He will probably need surgery but meantime has antibiotics.
I really don’t want to be driving to an unfamiliar place in the dark but will if I have to.

Wyllow3 Saw my brother for a couple of hours. He said he's very tired because he wakes up in the night and takes ages to get back to sleep. I think we've all had that. He doesn't do anything to get tired during the day, though - no regular cleaning, no cooking (he could cook but doesn't), and he doesn't get any fresh air. I Googled Lennox-Gastaut syndrome. I looked at their website. It's rare. Does that mean that not many doctors know about it? Poor girl (and of course, parents and you), I hope she gets the operation. Just saw that you need to see or speak to a GP about the Cystitis again. It's an unpleasant and painful thing to have. Hope you get it sorted out soon.

EllieAnne It's a shame you missed the church today. Has the doctor been to your husband yet? I wonder if he might have Cellulitis, or perhaps Gout? I'm glad that your daughter and DILs are keeping in touch. Most men are poor at communicating, I think. Your sons will be aware of what's happening. Hope your husband gets treatment and that you'll be able to get out tomorrow.

ScaredyCat Glad you're having a good time. You always make the most of your days.

Doodle That lunch sounds good. Plenty of choice. You're good to help with the washing-up. They need to invest in a dishwasher .

Rang my friend's wife - poor woman, she visited him today (still in hospital, over 2 weeks now) and he's not going home yet. The daughter with M.E. had a new, private carer 2 weeks ago - the woman has left already! So my friend's wife is cooking food for the daughter (even though she can't eat anything), doing her washing and shopping. Some people have tough lives. x

Thank you Sweetpeasue for thinking of me. Hello everyone. I try to read all the posts. But it takes a lot of energy. Enjoy hearing of your pleasant times and holidays. But also feel sad and sympathise when I hear any of you are suffering or your friends or families. And still praying for everyone on BD.
I am doing very little recently. Too much time spent resting! Get out for a short walk or coffee now and again. Trying the GP tomorrow but don't hold out much hope for help. I do the puzzles on GN as they distract me and relieve the total boredom. Tried art on Wednesday but had to leave early.
Sending love xxx

I like the Limericks at times nadateturbe but haven't been in recently. You are good at puzzles, they leave me in a bit of a blank. I'm sorry you had to leave early, it's always a disappointment. Here's a favourite for you...and a favourite version - this couple do a lot of wonderful prayer songs (Stay with me)
www.youtube.com/watch?v=-yXzhAS5990&list=RD-yXzhAS5990&start_radio=1

It seems that this is what we can do for you EllieAnne - "stay with you, as far as possible" while you wait, or yes, get in the car to get to hospital. Definitely tell DiL's so they know xx

There is a chance that if he is in hospital then they will do a care assessment or you can ask for one. You need to be as honest as you feel you can - not to hide the care difficulties, what you cannot do. No shame in that. As for the driving, yes, it's not good in the dark or early in the morning. Thoughts with you.

I will get it sorted, HVDY. Like you, reasonably good at asking, and a reasonably responsive GP place, tho you have to make many more visits than I do.
Yes - DGD is a lot worse than I thought. Her ability to use language is troublesome, she is so tried with the constant fits, she cannot summon the energy to talk as well, and now uses single words to ask for what she wants.
(Its like things with A if he doesn't take the Dopa - one has to become a bit of a translator.)

I've always been fascinated by how to communicate if nattering doesnt work. Like I had way back in the day a cleaner when I was getting ready to sell a large house alone in 2011. She was Hungarian with little English, a loving soul, we used to use hand signals and end up giggling.

Yes, your brother needs to do physical things in order to sleep better, is very likely. Any chance of getting him off to chair yoga? Yes I know it's left field but I'm thinking of what he can do rather than cannot.

Yes - your friend's wife is having a very tough time. she seems so habituated to it she wont stand up to friends worse sides.

Doodle as I drove past various churches on the way to the gym I saw a lot of evidence of autumn harvest services. All rather lovely, in yet another day of good weather.

I can just imagine the heap of washing up after that!

The quaker Zooom was very special tonight, just one of those things - or me in the mood for it.

Greetings to all BD's not in, or just reading.

Thank you Wyllow3. I think you posted that to me a while ago, and I forgot about them. Stay With Me is beautiful, although sad, and comforting in a way. I'll listen to more.x

I love their singing, and yes I do believe you are right. 😉

Wyllow3 Good luck with getting through to a GP today. Hope you get some effective treatment. My brother wouldn't go to any group exercise thing. He's not at all sociable; he never has been. Thanks for the idea, though. He's got a big garden, doesn't do anything in it, never has - someone mows the lawn occasionally.

nadateturbe Hope you get some help from the GP. It must be very frustrating to not be able to do things. It's good that you can at least get out for coffee sometimes. Could you go to a park occasionally?

Not much happeneing today - aqua and brunch with my friend, then I might get my nails "done". Wonder what happened with EllieAnne's husband....... x