Waiting for memory clinic referral

It has taken a year ,but after GP referral and neuropsychological tests at memory clinic my husband (77) has a diagnosis of Mild ( it doesn’t seem mild!)Cognitive Impairment - not yet dementia as we had assumed. He has just started a 14 week’ cognitive stimulation’ course which apparently can help to slow down progression of memory loss. He also had a Drivability test as we are concerned about his driving- he passed 😱- but will be tested again in 6 months. I discovered that Admiral nurses have appointments at Nationwide branches, which I found helpful. My sympathy to all of you going through this too 💐 it’s so hard to see someone you love slowly trickling away.

One suggestion is to ring his gp and tell him your concerns. Hopefully, the gp will talk to your husband the next time he sees him and give him an assessment and a referral if he thinks it's necessary.

The GP might even invite your husband in for a 'general age related health check'.

I’ve read the posts about husbands with diagnosed Alzheimer’s/ Dementia but my concern is how do you get your husband to agree to see a doctor? Mine has increasingly alarming loss of short term memory and he knows it. If by chance I say something like “ I told you that yesterday “ there can be an explosion of anger based in his own frustration at lack of memory. He refuses to have a hearing test and that’s another issue and likes to set himself apart reading the paper or books. His siblings are also reclusive. I am noticing this more and more, worrying about it but can’t see how to get him to get help, without him getting angry. Any advice gratefully received.

Can i just say that when you know someone with dementia,you know 1 person with dementia and not everyone's journey is the same.

Please don't be scared by other people's tales, grannyjacq1.

ordinarygirl, you are entitled to ask to be re-reffered.

My husband was assessed by a memory nurse and found not to have Dementia. I would agree in part but when she asked him his address -she forgot to ask for the postcode. We've lived here for 3 years and he still doesn't remember
He often forgets where we are going . I tell him in the shop to turn left and he goes right. He gets Tesco mixed up with other supermarkets.

We accessed the memory clinic for my husband by way of a gp referral. We were given an appointment 12 weeks after the gp’s appointment. The appointment lasted 2 hours and three weeks later we went for the results. My hubby has mild cognitive impairment due to severe auto immune encephalitis 3 years ago. The clinic found no evidence of dementia at this time. We found it helpful to know that hiss issues are due to the encephalitis and not anything else. We are now waiting to see the neurologist and explore neuro physio. So the memory clinic can be helpful in confirmation or exclusion of symptoms. Treat it as an opportunity.

I found the Admiral nurses helpline to be particularly useful with practical and emotional issues.

You have a tough time ahead. My husband had a brain scan march 2025 and was diagnosed with alzheimer's unfortunately a couple of months ago he went downhill rapidly and has now been admitted for respite care. Hallucinations and controlling behaviour admitted for my safety. Nothing prepares you for the empty house and the guilt. My heart goes out to you. Please enjoy every moment whilst he is still the man you know

Thank you for your really helpful suggestions - I think I'm going to need them. My mother had dementia towards the end of her life (90s) but was able to be cared for at home until the final 3 weeks, but somehow it seems a lot worse when it's a husband who you've lived with for over 50 years. I often wonder what would happen if both partners in a couple get a dementia diagnosis? I suppose it depends on family support, if available? Increasingly important, I think, to look after myself too if possible!

I volunteer for AgeUk's Memory Service. You can access their services at any time even if you haven't had a final diagnosis. They are really good at signposting and offering advice.

The Alzheimer's Society has lots of great fact sheets on their website and a forum called Talking Point.

Admiral Nurses are really good points of contact if you have one in your area. They have a helpline which is listed on the Dementia Society website.

My main volunteering area is helping to deliver Carer Learning Courses which are brilliant for helping you with strategies and also benefits advice and looking after yourself.

There is lots of help out there.

I agree with Marmin, my mum died 13 years ago after some years in a care home due to her dementia.
Would say that on the day she was diagnosed she was also discharged , so we had no help support or advice from the nhs from then on.

Please contact Alzheimer’s society who have numerous resources to support those with and those caring for people with dementia.

I am sorry about your dh, it is a cruel disease.

My experiences ten years ago when going through the same procedure with my mother was that there were countless leaflets but no practical help. It sounds like you have already taken the most important steps, well done. One resource I did find invaluable was the forum of the Alzheimer's Society website. Free to join and peopled by many others in the same situation. I found several threads written by people who had experienced what I was going through and much of the advice was invaluable,- particularly in helping me to understand what was happening and how best to cope and deal with it.
I wish you well.