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Joseph x 2 and a 'dead hamster' tale (sorry bit longwinded)

(37 Posts)
Grannyknot Wed 18-Dec-13 08:13:25

aka I scored sort of medium-ish (30 if I remember) on the psychopath test and it told me how wonderful and empathic I am. Funnily enough, husband who is a much tougher character than I am, and gave completely different answers (I was watching over his shoulder) scored much the same. So we're two all loved up non-psychopaths.

tiggy I better investigate the points. I also think they're high-priced items with a touch of 'style over substance'.

bags I didn't get asked, and jess it was presented with a "see-what-a-wonderful-gift-I-found-for-you" excited smile, so that's why I'm finding it a bit difficult to be apparently shitty about it.

phoenix not ridiculous, I carried a lone spatula here all the way from SA - and we arrived with only 2 suitcases each having given everything else away. (Now that was liberating!)

I have to deal with it so my wooden spoons can take their rightful place again, alongside the plastic timer in the shape of a hen ... tchsmile

thatbags Wed 18-Dec-13 07:52:02

Take the stuff you don't want to a charity shop, or bin it, and tell him you're content with what you have. He may sulk for a bit. Shrug. Did he ask if you wanted new stuff?

Yes, I've been there. e.g. a silver cutlery 'canteen' (is that the right word?). All very posh and unsuitable and they bloody well need polishing! They are in their beautiful wooden box on top of one of the kitchen cupboards and I continue to use my old and well-loved actually useful stuff. I might get round to using the knives when the old bone handles on the current ones eventually fall off. might !

JessM Wed 18-Dec-13 07:19:10

Just 'fess up and tell him you don't like fancy designer kitchen gear for presents. IMO you are being a bit silly - this is your DH you are talking about not some touchy aged relative who is about to disinherit you and change his/her will in favour of the cats home.

tiggypiro Wed 18-Dec-13 07:11:19

Not having a clue about what Joseph Joseph stuff was I have just googled it. After nearly choking on my porridge at the price I do realise why your DH keeps getting it for you grannyknot. The more he buys the more points he gets and we all know that points mean prizes so you could end up with even more !!!!!

Anne58 Wed 18-Dec-13 00:10:59

This may sound totally ridiculous, but one of the things that I actually insisted on having when I left exdh, was a very cheap wooden spatula, that over the years (and many of them!) seemed to have curved due to the way it was used.

I have got it now, probably half the width that it was to begin with, but the way it fits into my left handed grip and feels so right.... I gauge the consistency of sauces by "feel"

Tegan Tue 17-Dec-13 23:56:35

They look like utensils that have been designed by a man who never cooks to be sold to a man who never cooks to give to someone who's too nice to say she can't cook with them.

Anne58 Tue 17-Dec-13 23:50:51

Grannyknot sorry, but laughing here!

Lona Tue 17-Dec-13 23:34:09

Aka You are a woman after my own heart!

Aka Tue 17-Dec-13 22:10:24

You are too kind by far Grannyknot .. I bet you scored low on the psychopath test (on another thread). Talking as one who scored high on that scale I'd call a halt now by saying something subtle like "I hope you're not planning on getting me any more of that J&J rubbish that I've just taken to the charity shop'. That should focus his mind.

annodomini Tue 17-Dec-13 21:59:05

I inherited a load of wooden spoons of varying sizes from my mother. I keep them in a brightly coloured Provencal utensil jar along with several silicone spoons and a J&J colander/ladle thingy. I don't mind having unmatched utensils - in fact, they reflect my history. Breadboard and pastry board were both bought 48 years ago in Nairobi.

Elegran Tue 17-Dec-13 21:51:16

You can't beat wooden utensils. If you leave them too near the heat they char, but they don't melt (well, they might go on fire if you leave them long enough). Didn't they find out recently that wood has a natural antiseptic in it, so wood is actually much more hygienic that scratched plastic? After all that ceremonial burning of grandma's heirloom wooden spoons, too!

Grannyknot Tue 17-Dec-13 21:43:14

This is a bit like the urban legend of looking after someone's pet hamster and it dies so you go off to the pet shop and buy one that looks just like it. Excepting it's about the Joseph and Joseph kitchen utensil set husband bought when he decided our my favourite collection of assorted wooden spoons and spatulas were beginning to look a bit ratty.

Anyway it's on on of those carousels and when it first appeared in the kitchen next to my hob, I promptly fished all the discarded wooden spoons out of the recycling and hid them in a drawer. Then I tried to get used to the J&J but on one particular day about a week in, I obviously put the spatula too close to the hob flame, turned my back and - yep, it had caught alight! Managed to dowse the flames pretty quickly but was then left with a twisted smelly bit of plastic and one item short on the carousel. Phoned J&J (because I didn't have the receipt and didn't fancy 'fessing up because maybe, just maybe it was subconscious sabotage grin) only to discover that they don't sell individual replacements of the plain charcoal colour. So I kicked up a helluva stink about the dangers of selling inflammable implements without a warning and the poor woman went off and came back to tell me she had found one in the factory but I mustn't complain about it having "a few scratches".

A couple of days later my new set was complete again and no one was any the wiser. However! I've now got J&J scales, and a timer, because husband thinks I like the darn things. But I don't! I'm forever bumping the carousel and they all domino down on the counter. The very fancy digital scale wobbles all over the place and flashes "unstable" at me on a tiny screen. And the timer isn't loud enough.

So if there is an addition to the J&J collection in my Christmas stocking (because I fear he thinks he is on to a good thing) I may just have to come clean after all and break his design-loving heart.

I sound so ungrateful but is it only me that likes my familiar, battered old stuff?