Downsizing Wobbles

What a challenge Sewsilver, the timescale sounds very tight to make such a big decision.
Since clearing out our family home after mum's death a few year's ago, we sisters have all been attempting to re-cycle/charity shop items from our own homes. Clearing out the family home was a very emotional time for us and I do empathise with you.
Have you considered putting things into storage, and renting for a while. That may give you time to process what's happening, as well as more time to find your new home

My move to a smaller house was the right thing for me, Sewsilver. I would have been rattling round in the big house I had when my children flew the nest. Lots of cleaning, expensive to heat, high maintenance and repair/decorating costs. In my little cottage, I have the equivalents of a large apartment, room for visitors to stay over, plenty of garden, but not much cleaning. It's cosy and feels like my sanctuary. Never regretted it. Good luck in your search.

Living with less 'stuff' is really quite liberating. However, you do need to give yourself the time to sort through properly making calm decisions about what is really important to you.

We now live in a home where there is no loft space, and so nowhere to stash 'stuff' that has no real purpose. Its very liberating and makes us think twice about what we buy and use.

If at all possible I would try and gain a little extra time to ensure you are not rushed but downsizing itself has worked beautifully for us and I know that my daughters will not have lofts full of 'stuff' to trawl through when we eventually shuffle off this mortal coil.

I thought this was a thread about breast reduction!!

On divorce I moved from a large 3 bedroom to a little terraced house. It was fine at first, but I can't seem to stop adding to the stuff which has accumulated in the tiny box room, as I have run out of storage space. My kitchen is very small and the overflow from the cupboards is in plastic baskets on the worktop, leaving me only a 2ft square space to work on, not ideal, as I love my baking. Financially I have no choice, but would love a larger place with a garage. If I could cure my ebay addiction it would help!
If you are not a natural minimalist, I would advise caution!

We downsized a few years ago, moving from our large family home to a small bungalow. I haven't regretted it at all. When we moved it was quite a shock to see how much "stuff"we had gathered over the 30+ years we had lived there. Gradually we've got rid of so much and it is very liberating. Obviously I have kept the really precious things, photos, some things that belonged to our parents etc, but otherwise it's gone! I wll say though, that we stayed in the same neighbourhood which made the move much easier, still having family and friends around us.

So have a look at the new house with an open mind, try to imagine your things in there and good luck

shysal, we must be sisters under the skin. Clutter gathers round me. Don't know where it all comes from. Well, Ebay... Seriously, Sewsilver, I downsized into a skip - or three. You might find a charity shop that will come and collect un-needed furniture. There's one in Poynton that takes furniture, but that's probably too far. Just don't try to get a quart into a pint pot.

After my husband died a few years ago, I straightway downsized from 6 large bedrooms to a three bed terrace. It was all pretty horrendous at the time but it was the best thing I ever did. I got rid of masses of stuff, and even now I occasionally have another sort out. I don't like the idea of my offspring having to do it all when I'm gone. In someways I feel I'm being myself now, a new start that I'm determined to enjoy.

Having said that I must add that I get down days, and I miss his company dreadfully.

Culag

We downsized a bit when we moved down here, and certainly decluttered. We lost a bedroom and a dining room, but acquired a double garage with a huge loft, as well as two other lofts in the house. As you can imagine, they are filling up rapidly...

I haven't regretted it, apart from missing the dining room occasionally; there is still plenty of room for the two of us. Theseus renovated the workshop in the garden, turned it into an office, set up a separate wifi and that gets rid of gives him a space of his own.

I downsized (divorce) from a very large house to a terraced cottage twenty years ago, and I've loved it.

In two years I shall be selling and moving to a rented apartment in the same area. I am already clearing out the loft and anything else that I can
live without.

I'm looking forward to the freedom from responsibility and maintenance costs.

It also means less for my children to sort out when I shuffle off to the Gransnet in the sky

Having an OH who has hauled me around the country after jobs and caused many a downsize, it is tough. But cathartic. I have been grateful for the chance to offload large and ugly family heirlooms, but still mourn a few things. Most of our houses have been large, but we have had to exist in smaller rented houses and flats between purchases and I think the biggest upside of a smaller house is the heating bills. Depending on how you feel about housework, you have to stay very organised in a small house and it seems to get dirty and dusty more quickly. But the thought of getting the smaller places clean and tidy isn't so daunting when you feel ill.

We are great hoarders, no matter what size house we live in, and getting dbh to part with anything is tough. I can feel a de-clutter coming on though. I wish you luck, it can be hard, but I have often moved and had to throw even more things out because they don't fit or don't suit the new house. Do as much as you can, a room a week perhaps. I had a huge house once and got rid of a whole large lorry load of furniture in one go and felt really proud of myself!

There's always a way round having less room, and I remind myself that the occupants of this cottage managed at the end of the 19th century. 3 adults and four growing children shared it in less comfort than I now have.

I had a formal dining table and now have no dining room. Instead, I've got a big kitchen with farmhouse table that is the hub of the house where everyone gravitates, the children draw, paint and bake, I sit with my friends and put the world to rights over a coffee, and we all crowd round it for dinner parties. I don't miss having a dining room - no-one ever stayed in it when I did have one - they just cluttered up the smaller kitchen. There's a slight change of lifestyle when you downsize, but for me it's been for the better.

After divorce I downsized to a small 2 bedroom house, For me it was tiny and I found that I had to move a few years later to a larger house. Take your time and as somebody else said, rent if necessary.

sewsilver I would caution against doing anything in a hurry. You may live to regret it. If you have no choice it is a different matter but it sounds as if you do have a choice so please take your time. Put stuff is storage and rent a small place for a few months and see how it goes. This will give you time to see whether it is right for you or not.

So much depends upon your lifestyle. If you have lots of people come to stay, as we do, you may well want more space. If you live close to all your friends and family you may well be fine in a smaller place.

If renting is not an option for you perhaps you could write a list of the things which are really important to you and work from there:

Number of bedrooms needed
Entertaining space
Location - rural, city, transport
Garden
Upkeep
Storage
etc.

Good luck whatever you do.

Is it possible to rent for a while sewsilver? Give you more of a chance to look round and find somewhere you like and is the right size. It would also give you a chance to find out which of your belongings you can live without. We have friends who moved from a 4 bed detached to a small flat but found it was a step too far. She got rid of things with the mantra 'do I love it, do I want it, do I need it?' Think I mentioned that on a decluttering forum , so excuse repetition. I ended up with some of her stuff!! They then decided it was a step too far and moved into a 3 bedroomed house - now think that could be too small because of when the DC and increasing number of GC come! Which is one reason why we have dragged our heels over downsizing, although I must say that our house is not huge and is not too bad to heat.

Crossed post with nonnie!

Keeping a big house is costly - heating and council tax for a start. We downsized ourselves from a 5 big bedroom house to a 2 small bedroom flat. It is fine. Threw away a mountain of stuff (over £1000 of stuff to Oxfam alone). Some that remains is in boxes that have not been opened since we moved in August. We do not need all the "stuff" we accumulate over the decades.
I miss the bath and that is all at the moment.

But we are in rented accom - so there is the option of finding somewhere a little bigger with a bath.

My husband and I downsized four years ago, but we rented first for six months in one place, then decided to move somewhere else, where again we rented for six months.
We bought the bungalow I now live in in the second village but my husband died two years ago. Last year I was going to sell this bungalow, as it does not have happy memories for me, and move into a flat in the centre of the village. Unfortunately I was then ill myself and had to live with my son and his family for three months, and now cannot carry anything weighing more than 5kg. It's going to take me forever to get rid of all the books, etc., that I do not want/need and get the bungalow looking smart enough to put on the market.
The problem now is that I do not like planning ahead just in case anything else bad happens.

my older daughter is in the process of downsizing from a 4 bed house to a 2 bed flat as her children have all flown the nest..shes moved a few tims over the years and has always said when you look at a new property you know instantly wether you feel at home in it and shes always used that as a guideline....shes been very happy in all the places shes lived in..

We don't need all the stuff that we think we do. However, for anyone fairly newly on their own for whatever reason, keep the 'memory' things at least.We don't need hundreds of wine glasses, or vases or other things though. De-cluttering is definitely good for the soul though and signifies a new start.Even if you still need 3 bedrooms [visitors] you can buy a smaller house all round.I seem to do so little cleaning these days [and it still looks good!] that I'm glad we downsized.I would always want a garden though, even if I had to have a small courtyard style garden, as a private outside space.

After my parents retired they decided to move from a 3 bedroomed house with some land in the country to a 2 bedroom flat with no land, not even communal in a small town.

My mother tolerated it for 6 months and then they bought a 3 bedroom house with lots of garden space which my mother loved but my dad was the labourer. This house was on the edge of the same town in Scotland. They were there until they died in 1979.

I'm clearly not as houseproud as some of you! I simply switch off the heating and close the doors on the rooms we don't use! When people are coming to stay I put the heating back on and clean the room.

Has anyone on this site actually up sized? A part from Charleygirl's parents.

Yes, I upsized from a sprawling four bedroomed house to an Edwardian semi with more rooms. I still cater for great numbers of people even though there are only five of us living in the house full time, so can't get rid of the dozens of plates, serving dishes, glasses, bed-linens, towels etc. I still sometimes run out of space and have to juggle sleeping arrangements. The problem is that if we did downsize we would still end up with people living with us long-term and then we'd be cramped. In one (three bedroomed) house we ended up turning our lounge into a bedroom for a year as there were me and my husband, plus three children all occupying the bedrooms - and a friend in need of accommodation (was supposed to be for a few weeks, but turned into a year). In each of our houses we've ended up providing accommodation for waifs and strays; at least here we have the space for permanent long-term visitors and it's easy to accommodate large numbers of people who are only staying for one or two nights. Our current lodger is part of the family now and even though he's had several work transfers he'd rather stay here and commute than move.
So, no downsizing for us for the foreseeable future.