House on market and I'm a bit lost

There’s a kind of equation where you have to balance how much you want to move with how much you need the money. When we were selling my parents bungalow, after a few months, we had had one offer which was well below the asking price.

I was talking to my husband about whether we should accept it and he said (ironically) “Well of course, there’s all the other offers to take into consideration.”

It kind of put that one offer into perspective.

My son, who does a lot ofdeals in his work, says that you can only bargain when you are prepared to walk away. So are you ready to lose this buyer for the chance of getting more money later?

Having said that the first offer is pretty much a try and most buyers expect you to say no and then they make their real offer.

Thanks Grammaretto. My elderly aunt is 82 and I can't talk to her about it, she gets upset as she says it makes her feel helpless. When I talk to the dog, he wags his tail at everything! I do have an elderly cat too - I'm worried about renting with her, she's been so used to this solitary life and fields of territory, there aren't any other cats here.

I've got an advanced viewing booked, a woman from Liverpool, coming on 10 June.

I feel really uneasy about speaking to the EA tomorrow.

I did get the impression they want me to accept whatever Mr Buyer offers as so many viewers have rejected the house - but now is the time when people really start looking. I was ready to go on the market last August and paid hundreds for a cleaning firm, but the EA moved offices and delayed by three weeks or so. My son's view was that I could wait a long time for another offer, and during the wait for perhaps another £20K have to spend double that. It's just a horrible game isn't it. Hot tap water was yellow today for the first time ever - I've googled it and it seems its 'minerals' in the tank.

Have been dozing again this afternoon and the razor blades in my throat have subsided, thankfully. I don't have tonsils and any infection seems to really affect me.

I'm off to Macdonalds as my frozen curry is out of date by about six months! I'll tell you how I get along with the paper straw, I love the chocolate milkshakes.

Hugs to all and thank you for your support.

If ever someone needed to downsize it's you mosaicwarts.
If you are on your own apart from the dog(s) it isn't going to get any easier.
How desperate you are to sell to these people though is another matter. It may be wise to keep them waiting and hold out for a slightly better offer.
I hope you have some idea of where you'd like to move to and know how much the move will cost.
You need to have some money in the bank to celebrate with!

Oh mosaicwarts....your poignant 'we had a great life here' tugs at the heart strings but selling houses is a heartless business and we all have to try to emotionally separate yourself from the whole thing. I think I was lucky in the fact that I REALY wanted to move - there were things that had made me fall out of love with the house which was a huge help. However, it did make me feel I was radiating 'needy and desperate'!
Like you I found myself far too chatty with viewers...I kept forgetting it was not a social thing, they were not visiting us, just looking at the house. The bizarre thing was that our eventual buyers confused me as it was two generations and a child in tow. I thought I was talking to the potential buyer and it turned out that it was the son who was the buyer - I had been chatting to his Mum!
Honestly when the right person comes along they just want the house (at the right price of course) so do not worry about what you are saying too much. That being said a wise friend did say do not let them know all the potential negatives initially....let their emotions sway them first.

I'm not the cleverest person in the world, and feel a bit scared today of what lays ahead. Steve always managed everything for us and I am wondering what he would do.

My friend, who has sold several properties both here and abroad, has just emailed and said to stick to my guns for £400K. It is such a lot of house for the money, and we've had a great life here. Both Steve and I spent our small 'inheritances' from our parents on the house, I wish now we'd had fantastic holidays instead. I have to leave so much behind - I'll miss my aga, and my bronze lions.

The original valuation was £600K, but when I mentioned the works that need doing, the EA I chose thought £500K was a more accurate price reflecting the renovation costs.

After six months of viewings over the autumn/winter/early spring they recommended I drop the price to £450K, which I have. The EA told me most viewer's comments are that it is too big a project. The few people I've had to show around due to the EA being unavailable have lived in modern properties. Taking on a 172 year old listed building is a completely different ball game. I have warned people of the 'photographers' as train/architecture enthusiasts love this station. Might have put them off, but it happens a lot. Only yesterday my dog alerted me to a man wandering around in my driveway yesterday taking photos. Now I'm alone, I find it unsettling, it would be polite to knock.

My friend also thought the couple may have 'planned' the visit, hoping I would invite them in.

I'd better do the rounds to make sure I'm ready for a viewing tomorrow. I'll also try and 'think out of the box' and buy some time by asking for time to think about things, rather than my normal impulsive responses.

Enjoy the rest of your Sunday. I do miss doing the big family lunches, I haven't peeled anything since Christmas Day!

Sounds marvellous HildaW, thank you for sharing. I remember moving into our house here ... silly me wore a maxi skirt, I must have stood on the hem twenty times and shown my nix to the world going up the steps! I tied the door keys onto long pieces of string for us to wear as necklaces, my friend was locked out of her new home instantly! The worst thing for us was the mattresses - the smell of smoke from them was absolutely disgusting, they must have smoked the whole of the 400 mile journey.

I will tie my fingers crossed together, and hope they still offer after their third viewing. I've found a small rental locally that takes pets, with an enclosed garden - only £425 per month. I can camp out there whilst I travel up and down the country looking.

Will update after viewing 3! xx

P.S. as to removals. We did go down the totally professional route and it was excellent. To be honest we felt it was good value - not cheap but they were so professional, polite and careful we could not fault them. We packed the boxes ourselves over a 4 week period. Starting with the least used stuff and eventually getting to the kettle, mugs and tea bags on the morning of the move. Bold felt tips very much needed to label each box! We were packed up one day....drove over ( 3 hours) and arrived by 5...they unpacked the bed, sofa tv and the kitchen box and over night bags and then drove to a secure site leaving us to settle down for the night after a supper of take out pizzas (excellent - had researched the week before). The next day they were at the door at 8 with the lorry and slowly took all day to unpack - they took their time so as not to rush us and were happy to rearrange stuff we realised would not fit (we had made plans but you never really know).
Any way it all went swimmingly. You know exactly what it will cost because they come around as soon as you call them and do a very detailed list. They only need an approximate date in the beginning but once you have a firm window they like to know. Then once you know the exact date its all systems go.

Mosaicwarts. They really should not turn up on your doorstep without going through the EA. Its common curtesy as you could be ill....oh yes you are! Sheesh. Do not think anything of it but certainly let the EA know they 'popped round'. People can be a bit funny, we had one serious viewer who stood in our kitchen and made a suggestion we could have some sort of private arrangement! Nowadays you just could not get away with it any way but it did rather flag him up as a bit of a rogue and probably not to be trusted.
These people must go through the EA for any subsequent visits - that's how it works! Hope you get a decent night's sleep.

You couldn't make it up, could you.

I walked the dog, then put on my comfy house clothes and dressing gown and lay on the sofa with another 2 paracetomol and a big herb tea. I have such a bad headache, I've been dosing every four hours. As I was expecting 'the call' today I put the house phone and mobile phone next to me on the floor. Watched a bit of tv and unfortunately fell asleep - woken up by my dog going mad and the doorbell.

The 'offer' family were all standing in my drive, his wife was on the steps as she'd come to the door. My sheltie was in my arms going barmy, and the gentleman had a dog in his arms. Apparently they were 'just passing' and found the dog on the road.

As I was so dozy and embarrassed, I mumbled where I thought the dog lived - rather than offering to take it, as I should have done - and the wife asked if they could have another viewing, which will be number 3.

I could kick myself. I should have offered to take the dog. When I'd woken up properly I went up to the neighbour to ask if they'd seen them - looks like they missed the turning. No idea if the dog was returned safely.

I do obviously have a very bad cold as my nose is completely blocked, I hope they forgave me, I'm sure I looked half asleep too I'm not awfully beautiful when I wake. I rang the EA to ask if they had his number, but they finish at 2 pm today, she was in the garden centre.

Will just have to put it down to experience, and if I have a nap in future, make sure I'm wearing my smartest clothes, ha ha!

Oh thank heavens, something potntially good to read at last. Mosaics, they all try the low offer, they did me and I was so fed up I was ready to capitulate. My EA squeezed another 5k out of them and every little helps. You need to get out of there before winter strikes and a builder would have seen the work and pitfalls and will be prepared. I am guessing but likely to be 2-3 months for your sale, if not quicker than that

My selling cost was 1.2% ( mates rates!!) to the EA

solicitor was between 1 and 2 k, I cannot remember actual figures

removals was tricky, 6 trips with 2 men and a sprinter van and a total of around £1500

Don`t be generous about leaving anything you could use, such as lampshades and think of yourself not everyone else with their memories. It has always sounded to me as though you and the house parted `spiritual` company a long time ago

Hilda is right, your immune system has taken a battering. As soon as you accept an offer then all systems go re getting ready and forget the garden and cleaning completely. You need to preserve yourself and act in little hops but every day. I don`t believe a builder will care about all those certs that I was asked for and I think your next stage will be smoother

Franbern, you too, I hope you get that offer, the one that takes you to your dream

Aw sheesh Mosaicwarts, its probably more to do with your immune system being less than efficient from all the stress. I went down with several nasty cold type things that I would normally fight off. Then when things were settled a whole rash of mini migraines! So try to pace yourself and get as much rest as you can.
My DH is a handkerchief man still...I find myself muttering why can't he use tissues when I'm ironing them but its a habit he'll never drop.

Thank you very much Eglantine21. I'll make a note and think I'll have to go and lie on the sofa, I just made my bed and feel a bit faint. I went to bed with a Vick moustache last night and did sleep, but my nose is completely blocked but dripping today. i wish I'd kept some of Steve's cotton hankies, these tissues are like sandpaper. TMI I know, I need to learn my lesson and breathe out when people sneeze near me!

The sale of my house involved:

Estate agents commission .75%
Conveyancing fees
Removal fees
Buyer requests such as an up to date service of the boiler

and for me storage fees
and temporary accommodation fees.

Plus 20% VAT on the basic price quoted.

Obviously it will vary from area to area and property to property.

Hope that’s helpful.

Mosaicwarts, no point her getting upset. Some people do seem to take it too personal as if the price somehow reflects a level of respect or similar. Its the price someone is willing to give...end of. There are plenty of more important things to get upset about....i.e. her Mum's happiness and welfare. Sorry if it sounds a bit bossy but you do not need to be smoothing her ruffles feathers about something she has no control over.

Fingers crossed for you Franbern, I hope one of the five puts in an offer so you can view your choices with confidence.

My fear of waiting for a better offer is that the house maintenance issues crop up constantly. I could well end up spending far more than £10K eg if the roof decides to go in the next storm.

I spoke to a fellow dog walker and he described the buying/selling lark as a poker game and he reiterated that the EA is working for me. Why they rang with a low offer saying that they 'may' be able to get more, I don't know. I haven't heard this morning, but do take on board the house is only worth what someone will pay for it.

The nice couple I was helping by collecting their paper gave me a box of Thorntons as I was passing this morning, I'm rationing them but rather enjoying one right now! I had a crown last year and it's almost instant toothache, but worth it!

If anyone knows how I can find out how to calculate how much my overall sale will cost me, I'd be grateful. Have returned from the IOW with a dripping nose and temperature, not good for googling! x

Update on my situation. As I said the lady who wants to buy this house lost her own purchaser a couple of weeks ago. She is doing exactly as i did when I moved here, downsizing from a large house a couple of miles away. Her house is back on the market, but at an eye-watering price. She says she really does want my house, but my EA advised me to put it back on the market.
Things do turn out for the best, having time to really think I had decided the flat I had offered on, was not really suitable for me. Obviously, the news that my house was no longer 'under offer' they put that flat back on the market and it have now an offer from someone else.
So, I am really starting again. Have had one offer which I refused (not just too low an offer, but also really found I did not trust these people), and one, yesterday, which I am considering. Today the EA's have five viewings here, so will see how they turn out. Fortunately, I will be out all day.
On Rightmove, I have selected four more flats to view when I visit Western super Mare in a couple of weeks time.
But do wonder if I should hold off making any offers until any sale on my house is well under way.
It will all happen - in its own time - and in the meanwhile I am quite happy in this house.

Sounds as if these builders really want it. Don't rush to accept a lower price!

I must recommend the Titan bars from Aldi - taste like Mars bars used to! It's nice to give working people refreshment, when Steve died I'd worn jumpers and saved my oil ... only to find it had been leaking from a small hole in the tank. What a nightmare that was, very luckily not enough to have to have the oily area excavated. Six men had to come and put in a temporary tank on what seemed the very coldest day of the year, I had Halloween biscuits and lots of hot chocolate for them. Brr I still remember the wind and hail.

My daughter has just texted, she is upset at the low offer price She loves this house and I think she worries because I'm not as astute as her Dad.

Oh ruddy biscuits....now that we are settled I was hoping to wean myself off....but we have builders in doing some hard landscaping AND grandchildren visited.....so.....biscuit tin is well stocked, I mean you just have to keep builders fueled!
Bless them they are so appreciative of decent coffee and biscuits and when I put out two jugs of iced squash when it was getting really warm they almost cheered.

Thank you so much for writing, I've got anxious chest pains. Our lovely electrician has just been and sorted out some dangerous wiring in the storeroom, at least the new owners will be able to plug in equipment whilst out in the garden now. I had told this buyer I was having this done.

No phone call yet. I've been looking at houses on line and must decide on where to live before my daughter returns on 10 June, I cannot faff about any longer. I'm going back on to see if I can find a rental at 'home' in Twickenham, perhaps going home will help me.

Biscuit tin is empty!

Good news at last! I hope the deal is clinched and you can finally relax. Then you will be the buyer and can pick and choose. Even if this one doesn't work out it must me a huge relief to know your house is desirable.
We sold a house a bit too cheaply but it went to good hands and the people who bought it are still there after 40 years.

Oh Mosaicwarts, that's encouraging - and your attitude is wise. When all's said and done the darn things (houses) are only worth what someone is really willing to pay. Think about the underpayment more as a percentage of the overall price...I found it sounded much less then!
Will keep my fingers crossed for you, all the very best.

I've just had a phone call from the EA - the viewer has offered after all! This is the anniversary of my husband's funeral three years ago, seems fated

£60K under my asking price, but they think they may be able to push him for a few bob more. The survey said at least £200K needed to be spent, but he is a builder and will be able to do a lot of the work himself. He would be making it his family home with his wife and two children I'll know by the end of the day. Not holding my breath, what will be will be!

Thanks everyone for responding, I've just got back from the IOW and met many lovely people who downsized and moved over there. It's not for me, but I was envious of their evident pleasure at having smaller bills, less pollution, less noise and less stress! As it is so popular the traffic is pretty appalling but the public bus service was good.

I've come back to a cold and rainy Northumberland and the house doesn't feel at all welcoming with all my things packed away My son has just gone and I'm going to put my pjs and slippers on and eat cake! xx

Oh yes.....so much variation in what a 'cash buyer' means. I think some EAs just take it to mean they do not need a mortgage...when the rest of us think it means no chain and they have funds readily available.
Yes, do try to keep more calm for the viewings for the simple reason that even when you have had a firm offer there is worse to come! Sorry! Honestly once you have done your initial declutter for the photos and viewings then just try to live normally....the eventual buyer will see through the domestic stuff and may be the one who just turns up with the minimum of notice...as ours did.