What Age do you consider moving?

I'm 66 and my husband is 63. We've both very active people. We've just sold our lovely large period cottage with a large garden and orchard and bought a modern four bed in a village with all the amenities - bus stop outside, shop, pub, post office, fish and chip shop. Half an hour by bus to nearest city and about five minutes to nearest small town, for when we can't drive. The main driver is to be nearer our only daughter and son-in-law to look after their baby a couple of times a week when she goes back to work. We're about half an hour from them, which we thought was a respectful distance, so no-one's crowded. The other reason is that while we're managing fine now, we know increasingly that may not prove the case. My husband is very practical and there's always stuff needing doing in our old house, which I would find difficult to organise tradespeople to do instead. Also while we have got rid of the mice which try to come in every autumn by using sonic plugins, these have to go in the roof as well as the house and the thought of mice petrifies me, so I couldn't cope with that on my own!!!! Moving is not for the fainthearted!!! I've moved many times but the legal side of it now seems so much more complex and lengthy. We've been lucky, our buyers are very nice people who were very reasonable and didn't push for any reduction after the survey, which of course showed up things as our house is over 250 years old. Our new house has one more bedroom and bathroom than we have here, and a much smaller garden. We'll be sad to leave our cottage, but it's the right time for us. An un-looked for by-product is that we've liquidated a nice bit of cash too. I'll just be glad to wake up at the beginning of August when it will all be over and we'll be in our new home, albeit surrounded by boxes. I think the key is to do it before you think you need to, it's a punishing, stressful and tiring process. We have been fortunate to have each other to lean on and it would have been so hard had this not been the case. My parents future-proofed their house which meant that my dad was able to live down-stairs when he got frail, but the huge garden was a nightmare to manage, so as well as looking after him we had to get people in to do the garden - I promised myself I would not put my daughter in that situation, It's not fair to do that - so yet another pressing reason for us to do it now!

I live in a 2 bedroom house so couldn’t downsize as such really. The only problem being is that it is a 3 storey house with lots of stairs. (The builders way of cramming more house into less space) . My lounge/sitting room is on the first floor and the bedrooms are on the top. I love this house but can see all the stairs becoming a problem as we get older.

Sounds lovely Gillybob

Go for it! Start by getting your property valued and move forward from there. Life is for living so do what makes you happy. Difficult if your husband isn’t on board, I know. But there’s nothing worse than living with regrets.

I am in the same position. 3 floors, not good with arthritis so with some regret at leaving our family home I have decided to move to a bungalow. It will also free up a bit of cash!

Oh how I agree with all your comments.

My other half doesn’t want to move, and I do.

But! And it’s big But. We just can’t seem to motivate ourselves. The thought of all the stress etc.
Trouble is, we need to move.
House too big and requires a lot of maintenance. Hubby still works full time and what time he has if is spent on gardening and maintenance, his health is not good and I see a day when I might be left to do it all and quite frankly it frightens me..As PamelaJ stated, ‘it’s easier if there are two of you’.
I am seriously thinking of the Churchill retirement properties. They do everything for you including selling your house, removals, solicitors, the lot.

Anyone had experience of them?

My mother-in-law moved close to us last year aged 94 so no age is genuinely too late if you are fit enough. She had been in your position previously, Grammaretto, with a husband terminally ill with no desire to move. She had many times discussed with him a move from a large old house in the middle of nowhere but he saw no need. She moved immediately after he passed away, to the edge of a market town into a nearly-new property. It was a big upheaval but a new start after years of caring.

That was seven years ago and she decided to come closer to us after a friend became very ill but lived miles from her family. She saw this as a warning and acted really quickly. The property she moved into is no smaller than the last but this time she has chosen to do a whole string of renovations (!) - most of which were unnecessary in my opinion - but she has enjoyed it and says that negotiations with the builders etc and getting up early for the workmen has kept her alert, interested and busy.
Whilst she does sometimes complain that all this is exhausting, she seems to have developed/renewed a genuine joy of life. I’m amazed by her energy and zest for the new!
There is hope for us all!

gillybob - if you love your house, might a stairlift work for you eventually? If necessary of course!

Go for it Nanaplenty. You are still young. Your plans sound perfect to me. As we age time seems to fly. Free up some money and go travelling/visiting without any financial worries and swop for a smaller labour free garden. Good luck persuading your husband. Maybe find some suitable properties on Rightmove first to show him what you have in mind.

Moved to a similar sized bungalow but much smaller garden and 170 miles away, to be nearer to daughter. Absolutely no regrets, I was 67 DH 69. Both of us have been very proactive in joining things and now, two years on, feel part of the new area and know people.

A stairlift in my house would be very difficult ( and expensive) I think NotSpaghetti as I said there are 2 sets of stairs and a long passageway in the middle too .

I have one of those victorian semis that are all over our older cities, and it now has 3 floors as we had a loft conversion. Thing is, it takes me years to feel at home in a new place so we've had toilets put in the loft and ground floor, to make one per floor, and I am keeping my fingers crossed that will enable us to stay here.

Ironic this question, as having moved 22 times within three different continents, we are just about to exchange contracts on a barn conversion in Dorset after not having lived in the UK for 44 years. Many of our local friends here in France think we are absolutely mad. But isn't it for you yourselves to decide - never mind what anyone else thinks? We are undertaking this very challenging move with our eyes wide open, having lived in South Africa, Oz, Belgium, and now France. Do what your heart dictates. If you procrastinate now, you will always ask yourself "what if". Others may not agree but we should like to think we have a huge amount of experience under our belt and therefore know more or less what we are talking about.

I am 80 and my husband 87 this month. We live in a bungalow which we moved to 25 years ago and are now planning to move to a retirement home next month which is a good size with 2 bedrooms and a balcony but the most important thing is that it is only yards from our town centre, park and cathedral.
Although we originally planned to stay in the bungalow for ever it has become hard to maintain the garden

Modern builds have no storage as I am appreciating now. I have just had 2 good cupboards built, in alcoves which would take free standing wardrobes and `double` bedrooms have become large singles. So where are people meant to put wardrobes? Be astute if looking at new builds, don`t be taken in by all the shiny glitz and 3/4 size furniture.

I have downsized stuff for over 4 years and just today have realised that this has to continue, only this time it is stuff that I wanted to keep. Those without crafting hobbies are in a better situation but I am not giving up my various crafts, not for love nor money

We lived in a large 3 bedroomed house with a nice sized garden when my OH was given the opportunity to take early retirement from teaching which he took. We downsized to a small 2 bedroomed bungalow in the cotswolds but I didn't really like it there and the bungalow seemed quite poky so we looked around and bought a lovely 3 bedroomed house house near the sea with a much smaller garden. Now the children can come with our grandchildren for their holidays and we have a much smaller garden to take care of and more importantly no stairs. We both have arthritis quite bad so it's a godsend. I wish we had done it sooner. Bungalows aren't just for old ones and I think your idea is a great one. Keep nudging your OH into the idea. It sounds ideal for you both

I downsized from a big 5 bed 2 bathroom property by the sea to a small 2.5 bed ancient cottage in the country - the dream (?) at the age of 69. If DH had lived, I doubt we would have downsized unless illness or other reasons forced it. We loved our house and our village, there was oodles of room for family and friends and there's not a day when I don't think 'what if?'.
I moved to be nearer my family - 400 miles - as I was spending hours travelling between one and the others and thought I should move while fit physically and mentally. It's not been easy and I desperately miss my friends. Meeting new ones is hard work, despite joining anything & everything. Only up side is being close to the DDs and GCs. I've been here 18 months and have yet to be able to pop in for a coffee/chat with a 'friend'. That's what I miss. I miss the familiarity and closeness of my old home.
Think very hard and weigh up all the options before making a life changing decision....I did and despite that am beginning to regret it. Is the grass greener on the other side? Who knows

I am desperate to move to something smaller. I have a four storey Victorian Guest House and the workload both physically and mentally is having a very detrimental effect on my health.
I am nearly 63 and have another 3 years before I get my state pension but cannot continue doing what I am doing.
We have been trying to sell it for several years and the asking prices is now £75000 below what we paid for the house (plus we have spent thousands on it).
I am now at my wits end as a sale has just fallen through and we have lost the little house we were moving to.
I say life is too short and if downsizing means you can travel more and visit your children then go for it.
I wish I could.

feet first

Have you seen all the articles about younger people buying bungalows because the old one often stood on big plots. Extending them every which way to be family homes. There are not enough bunglows. The likes of blue cedar build very nice homes with a study downstairs plus a shower downstairs ie future proofed, however they are in ghettos and aint half pricey with ongoing charges for maintenance. They were very nice, I looked at one

NanaPlenty - your suggestion sounds all very reasonable to me.

I think you need to find out what your husband's main areas of contention are with the idea.

It could be he thinks the upheaval would be too much for him or he loves the house too much or any number of other reasons. I think looking at othere solutions may then be the answer eg releasing capital from your property while in situ thereby giving you the money you want to visit his family abroad.

All in all it is something that needs resolving by communication, so get chatting to the hubby.

Good luck and enjoy your travels when you go.

DH & I downsized from a large 4 bed, large garden house when he was 70 & I was 56 (I had taken Early Retirement). We bought a lovely Park Home, only 11 years old & moved from Middlesex(Surrey) to Somerset. All happened in a hurry as we were just testing the market & asked top price although we did drop quite a bit off for a quick sale, luckily I had been researching & knew what area we wanted, approx halfway between his DD & my DD.

Sadly DH was taken into Hospital just less than 12 months after we moved & I was widowed 3 months later. I waited a year before putting property on the market, found a buyer but they couldn't sell their house. Luckily about a year later I was approached by a cash buyer for the full asking price, only downside was I had 3 weeks to move out. I organised removal firm & storage unit near my DD & went to stay with her for first 2 weeks. On the second day after I'd moved I found my place, an older Park (Mobile) Home so I rented a Holiday Flat (out of season) for a few more weeks.

Over the last 4 years+ I have made new friends, joined things, visited new places & been able to spend more time with my DD & DGSs. I have no regrets. DH & I moved at the right time for us as sad as it is I am glad I only had our new home to sell & not the larger one.

The decision is yours alone but I would advise de-cluttering even if a move isn't imminent, having to do that in a hurry isn't fun, when I moved in 2015 I took almost everything when I moved, DD & sorted from storage unit & disposed of unwanted items then. I was 59 when I moved here & intend that I shall leave in a wooden box

60 is no age, however 70 is a time when you get to not want change. So while you would like to move, I can understand why your husband is reluctant. I thought about ‘downsizing’ (how I hate that word) some time ago but was really shocked to find that all the costs involved in moving (solicitors, estates agents, moving firms, etc) can take £20,000, without the possible need to purchase new carpets and curtains for the smaller property. I decided to stay put and spent the money on making my current home more comfortable.

All this is making me feel slightly panic stricken. We have lived in this house for 52 years now. Built it ourselves with help from friends in the building trades. We extended it a bit upwards when I had my third baby at 40ish.

Do we have to move? Is it something you are expected to do? I can't imagine living anywhere else. The thought of leaving this house makes my blood run cold.

If the garden ever gets too much, I will simply let it grow into a nice little nature reserve. It will still be mine.

Anyway, we are both in our seventies now so we've probably left it too late.