Grandaughter scared of my 2 dogs

To those who simply say rehome the dogs, for those of us who share our lives with dogs, they're family. Yes, my grandchildren are higher in the order of things than my dogs. That's why my home is set up so when the 4 under 5 year olds are around, the dogs are safely and happily contained in the utility. Their beds are in there, they are fed and sleep in there and go in whenever I don't want them getting in the way of visitors, including the children.
I would never re-home a dog unless the dog posed a danger. I've never owned a dog like that and if I did, I'd be considering euthanasia rather than re-homing. I'm involved in a specific breed rescue charity. It's a real cause of despair that some people get a fluffy puppy, only to realise they grow into dogs, they do shed fur, they do need training and demand a lot of time and money. Often times they've not had great experiences so need considerable effort in foster care before they can be adopted safely. So "rehome the dog", isn't the simple solution some may believe it to be. It's also not something any responsible dog owner would do unless no alternative existed. In this case, there are many options available to the OP.

I really like big dogs but loathe small yappy dogs ,they scare me because they are the ones that snap & bite & don't really seem to take any notice of what their owners say in my opinion.

If you are scared of an animal that fear is not necessarily “irrational”. I adore cats and don’t understand how people are scared of them but I am aware that some people are.

I have a phobia about something, it is so bad that I can’t bring myself to name it. I was reading the local free paper and there was a picture of one. I had total hysterics and my husband had tear the picture out before I would look at the paper again

If you don’t have any phobias you really don’t understand how dreadful they are, especially if people are scared of something that a lot of people love

Please try and be more understanding

I'd get a gate and keep them on the other side while she's there. Children need to learn how to behave around dogs anyway, but in her case, only if and when she asks.

One of my grandchildren is terrified of ladybirds. There doesn't have to be any logic to fear or phobias. Emotions aren't logical.

I am not a big dog person, but anything that is very frightening needs to be addressed with gentle practicality.

First, ask parents if there is a specific reason why she is frightened.

Second, make sure your dogs aren't nippy or jumpy.

No getting rid of dogs unless they are dangerous.

Gently introduce your granddaughter to the dogs. Don't let them jump, nip or bark. Tire them out before she gets there, then give her a doggy treat to give to them. Teach her that she is in control of them.

Life is not easy and being afraid of dogs won't be easy in the long run. Much better to work to help her overcome her fears.

Pippa22 I so agree with you. I am petrified of dogs and get annoyed looks from dog owners when I ask them to get their dog off me as I seem to be a special attraction to them.
Sometimes I would like to let a snake crawl up their legs and see how they would like that.

It spoils most walks for me and I sometimes feel that my human rights come after the dogs rights.
There are far too many dog owners who don‘t know how to keep a dog and look after them but expect the rest of the world to ˋlove‘ their pooch. . Many don‘t even ask if it is ok to bring their Darlings with them when they come to visit

Thank you Sodapop for your comment. If I had a dog and my granddaughter was frightened of it the dog would be re-homed because her welfare would be more important to me than her fitting in with the dog!

MooMoo why are you looking for a reason for your GD’s dislike / fear of your dogs ? We all have different likes and dislikes in every aspect of life . Just because you like them it doesn’t mean that she has to .
We are all different and should respect that surely and make adjustments if necessary.

Agnurse had a great idea re/ using desensitization therapy. For those of you balking at the word "therapy", in this case it only means taking incremental steps to help someone understand and perhaps overcome their fear of something. Don't we all want that? For example, I'm afraid of flying. My son is in Mississippi just diagnosed with terminal cancer. Therefore, it behooves me to do something about my fear of flying.

In the OP's case, she has taken steps to separate her GD from the pups, wants to help her GD with her fear, and perhaps give her a positive experience with "man's best friend" down the road. I hardly think that MooMOO is advocating that her GD be forced to be with the dogs. Agnurse's suggestions are practical and thoughtful. Oopsminty's story about helping a child overcome her fear and then being thanked by that grownup child years later is a positive outcome of this suggestion.

Also liked Iam64's comments that she has her dogs remain behind a gate in the home, separating dogs and little ones to keep both canine and human members of the household safe.

Selsey99 I am really greatful for your kind comments. I take on board the positive comments and leave the rest.

Water meadow - I agree. This child is going to b on the same planet as dogs and other animals for the rest of her life if she does not get over this fear this is something she will take into adulthood and which will really Complicate life for her. Animals especially dogs can help children to learn to respect and care for our animal life we do not have sole rights to this planet maybe we could learn from them as we r making a complete mess of looking after it! Maybe the child's parents can help their child by taking someone's old dog for walks etc etc slowly slowly this can b overcome with patience and care. It saddens me to see the negative remarks on here we shld bring our children up to respect and care for the animal world, but by the majority of the remarks on here I can't see that happening.

I actually think that the more you avoid something you fear, the more likely it is to turn into a phobia. I think if she is happy to poke sweets into their cage, it sounds like they are a bit too boisterous for her. I would let her continue to let them have treats in their cage and if they have to come out of their cage for any reason, they should be on a short leash so she realises that they cannot jump up at her. I would take anything else at her pace and not push it.
The only reason I think it is necessary to desensitise her if possible is because it is miserable to have an ingrained phobia about something. I dread this time of year with the spiders coming indoors and I wish that when I was younger, I had been gently desensitised rather than having huge ones thrown at me. Any visit to a park or a walk along the road will bring this little lass into contact with dogs. Being very afraid, screaming and waving her arms about is more likely to get her bitten than learning to quietly avoid an unwanted dog.
My GD was terrified by our large but gentle dog until she stayed the weekend with us. Although he was made to stay in his bed, she learned to pass him without visible fear by the time she left. She still doesn't like him much but at least she's not kicking up a shindig every time he dares to lift his head up.

Not an unpleasant comment Iam64 it's a valid option.

good reasons - not food reasons!!!

I think you will find Selsey99 that the exclamation mark at the end of that sentence indicated an element of tongue-in-cheek.

But........... yes, I guess I do feel angry on behalf of this poor lass. Her own grandmother is on this site asking everyone what she should do about the fact that her GD is frightened of her dogs. Just about everyone - dog-lovers, dog-haters, responsible dog-owners, and non-dog-owners - have said the obvious: keep the dogs away from the child. But this child has a grandmother who cannot see this - who has not been able to work this out for herself. It is impossible not to feel sorry for the child.

Those of us who do not like dogs usually have very good reasons for that - and we also know that there are sadly dog-owners who are so absorbed in the wonder of their animals that they truly cannot get their minds round the possibility that there are entirely sane people in this world who do not share their passion, and greatly resent the underlying implication that they need to be "cured", as if this was some affliction.

This little girl needs to know that her grandmother puts her and her feelings first above those of her dogs; and she does not need to be bullied and cajoled into sharing her grandmother's passion. She needs to be respectfully accepted as she is; and the dogs need to be out of her way.

There are responsible dog-owners on this thread who actually board their dogs in order to make totally sure that their GC are safe and happy at their home - and I applaud them for this. This approach should be obvious and not require the combined advice of grans on this site.

Give this little girl a break and put her needs first - and do not try and make her feel she has got this wrong and needs sorting out - she will undoubtedly have food reasons for her feelings. Just hearing the news will have exposed her to an awareness of the very real possibility of harm.

I acknowledge and respect that some people love their dogs and they fulfil an important role in their lives; but, like this little girl, I do not want the dogs anywhere near me; nor do I wish to be told that "He is just being friendly" whilst he is jumping up, scratching my legs and dripping slobber all over me - no thank you!

Some of the most unpleasant memories from my childhood involve dogs - little nippy critters, slobbering labradors, yappy terriers of all types, flint eyed, snapping jawed sheep dogs, jumpy, springer spaniels (at least they appeared to be smiling), massive hounds putting their paws on my shoulders etc, etc. I was forced to endure these encounters but it didn't turn me into a dog lover. I'm all for respecting the feelings of everyone whatever their age.

“Re-home the Dogs”
What an unhelpful, unpleasant and unnecessary comment.

The child goes to the house she just doesn’t want the dogs around her sounds perfectly reasonable to me keep them in another room when she’s there

Rehome the dogs !

I make a distinction between not liking dogs vs. being afraid of dogs.

If someone has a severe phobia of dogs, to the point where they can't go outside if someone has a dog (even on a lead), desensitization therapy would be important. Truly, I am not sure if the child is at this point yet.

If someone isn't afraid of dogs but simply doesn't care for them, that's down to personal choice. Not everyone is a dog person. That's okay. That doesn't need "fixing".

It must be very difficult being scared of something which is encountered all the time. You can’t go anywhere without seeing the dogs which are part of one in three families.
That’s like being scared of children or old women or the colour blue.
Teach the child to get over it.

I have been afraid of dogs since a child. I am still afraid. I don't know why and can't explain it, even now.

Let your gd be your guide in this. It may be a phobia which will gradually disappear as she gets older, but if it doesn't, then you must accept her fears.

My message was for luckygirl

Who is that aimed at selsey

Whow what an angry lady! Dogs can b a big part of lots of people's lives and childrens and they help so many with disabilities and same with children. If treated kindly and with love they repay it a hundred times over and how dare u say the child is best kept away from his or her grandmother????