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Help calm me, house buying and selling stress part 2

(1001 Posts)
craftyone Sat 21-Sept-19 06:48:35

The first thread
www.gransnet.com/forums/house_and_home/1259313-Help-calm-me-House-buying-and-selling-stress

thread number 2

Framilode Thu 05-Dec-19 16:26:53

I'm a lurker on this thread who follows all your travails with interest and sympathy. I was an estate agent for 30 years and can confirm that the market goes ballistic immediately after Christmas day. People always think wait until the Spring, but that is not the case at all. The first couple of months of the year are always very busy.

craftyone Thu 05-Dec-19 15:43:46

oh yes those contract tractors are very scary on country lanes. I think they are allowed to do 30mph and they do. That is extremely reassuring about the garage and what they will be doing about finding a car. One thing you won`t have to worry about

Two ladies at carving today were saying about their oil, that they don`t have gas and their homes are very cold and that oil is very expensive. Its got to be on your must-have list mosaics, gas, set the thermostat and leave it.

My builder was so thoughtful, he put in a gas connection so that I could have a gas fire instead of a stove, for if when I get very old I cannot cope with a stove. I never asked him, he just did it and he also put in a blanked electric point so that I could have an electric fire if I didn`t want gas. He is a sweetheart and so are the men, telling me to be careful yesterday on my bike as the lanes were slippy

So two days ago I built 2 more outside plastic boxes from wayfair, to fit into a small space. I enjoyed the job and they now hold all my plant pots etc and I have transferred all my logs to the bigger keter storage unit that I built a few months ago, it is bone dry in there. I am still faffing around here and there, its what I like

mosaicwarts Thu 05-Dec-19 13:56:00

Thanks for the info MerylStreep, I don't wear glasses, just cheap readers for reading. I'll investigate the lenses though, I'm sure I could get a non prescription pair, thank you so much for telling me.

Just back from the garage and no hole in my exhaust, and no charge, he's such a nice man. He said he'd heard things about the garage I'd intended taking my daughter to, and he said to give him a few weeks to find her a good car. I do trust him, he's been very good to me over the past three years.

I was thinking about my anxious wait for a yeay or a nay from the buyer, and suddenly thought he is probably very busy - he might be travelling at the moment, or having other surveys done on other properties, who knows. I don't have much going on in my life, in comparison. The EA did use the words 'hounded' in reference to the chasing she had to do to get the cash buyer to prove his funds, and he withdrew, I'm just going to be patient and wait. I'm going to forget about it until next Tuesday, which will be a fortnight, and try to keep busy with decluttering/selling on ebay. I'm putting off cleaning the eight foot sofa, needs so much elbow grease to clean the leather, but will be worth it to get a good sale,

Off to the beach how after a very scary dark walk in the country lanes this morning, very glad I had my reflective jacket on as all the huge potato tractors suddenly appeared. Such huge machines now, compared to when we moved her twenty years ago.

Ellianne Thu 05-Dec-19 10:11:39

Franbern glad we both had helpful people somewhere in the process. Our godsend was the EA, a typical West Essex man who said it as it was but kept everyone calm. He ended up doing a lot of the work on behalf of our buyers too just to keep the sale moving. We gave him a bottle and chocolates for the office lady.

Ellianne Thu 05-Dec-19 10:06:33

I have always had Zeiss lenses too Meryl. They are so much thinner than the usual glasses as my prescription is pretty high. They are well worth the extra cost. If you do a lot of night driving they need the special coating which is anti glare or reflective.

MerylStreep Thu 05-Dec-19 09:36:14

Mosaics
Do you have prescription lenses? The reason I ask is: I went for an eye test/ new glasses last week. They introduced me to a new lens for night driving made by Ziess.
This lens isn't a separate pair of glasses but integrated into my lens/prescription.

I'll get them in a week or so. Will let you know as I've had the driving at night problem most of my adult life.

Franbern Thu 05-Dec-19 09:08:32

I was so fortunate in that the Lady who was dealing with my house at the EA's was so very helpful and on the ball the whole time.
She would often ring me up, just to check I was okay and to say, 'No News'. When the sale fell through quite near the end, she actually came round to tell me (and give me a cuddle when I burst into tears), rather than just telephone me with the bad news. She continuously chased up on all matter relating to the sale, including when the purchasers had a private survey.
The final week, she was marvellous - the 1st time buyers at the bottom of the chain used an on-line conveyancing company, when was very difficult to reach. She spend virtually a whole day chasing them and the EA for my purchasers. Worth every penny I paid that company - and,obviously gave her flowers, chocolates and a Thank You card when it all completed.
The drama group meets in the lounge area of a bowling club, which is just around the corner from where I live - perfect for me. Do not intend to do any 'acting' - will start out just helping with 'props', although we did have to do a short group improvisation yesterday and I thoroughly enjoyed what I did.

Ellianne Thu 05-Dec-19 08:59:48

Yes, I've just read that Boxing Day is the day millions of prospective movers go on rightmove. Maybe like booking a summer holiday after family discussions?
Does your place feature as STC mosaicwarts? If you haven't heard anything concrete by the weekend why not ask the agent to put it as "under offer" so other people can still come along?

mosaicwarts Thu 05-Dec-19 07:42:17

Morning craftyone, I'm never sure if I'm a disgruntled old lady, thanks for the encouragement! I'm always so nervous of being a pest, but as you say, I am paying them a fortune when it's sold. When I have phoned, they talk at a million miles an hour as though they can't wait to finish talking to me. I hadn't thought of the buyer fading away, without notification, the thought shocks me. I will think of the auction figure, although the process fills me with dread, having to get out in a month, so I'd have to have somewhere already lined up and be paying for it in advance. So looking forward to smaller bills. My oil watchman has dropped 200L from last week - looks like the central heating is using 150L per week, as the aga uses about 50. Have about 1400L left, so should see me through till the January order. My purse has holes in it at the moment, tightening the strings majorly in the new year.

Last night I did have to do the scary drive and I'd bought some of the yellow driving glasses - they did help a bit. I had only gone a short distance down my road when a deer wandered out (it was 10 pm) - luckily the only one I saw. My daughter is home now, but will be popping off to Belfast to see her new boyfriend regularly.

I'm up early to take my car in, I have to walk my dog first in the pitch dark, make his breakfast, then get all the painters pots outside, have just made him a flask of tea. Hopefully daughter will use the bathroom before he arrives if he's working on the bathroom window.

Have a good day everyone smile

craftyone Thu 05-Dec-19 07:12:12

The EA is not providing enough support. He should be ringing you every week to ask how you are doing and to give you any update, even if saying that there have been no enquiries. I was thinking about this and he does need to ring your buyer to find out the state of play, he doesn`t even need to mention the surveyor but needs to know if there is any progress. The worst thing would be if the buyer faded away without the common decency of informing the EA

So, maybe another limbo period mosaics. Maybe mentally prep to at least get a ballpark figure for auction. Hope your journey home was straightforward last night. Is dd home for the holiday now?

Grammaretto Wed 04-Dec-19 20:42:27

We had skodas too and loved them but our latest car is a Toyota
Touch wood, it has been brilliant and low road tax.
Toyota are the world's most popular car. Not glamorous, flashy or fashionable but reliable. There are hybrid and electric versions .

I can't understand why your house hasn't sold, mosaics. If I was your EA, I would be ashamed of myself.

I see that the town of Hexham is the happiest place to live in Britain.(according to rightmove)

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tyne-50648734

mosaicwarts Wed 04-Dec-19 19:45:10

Thinking about it craftyone, the EA should have phoned me to say no news yet. It's not the best time of year to be waiting around for news that affects your future.
I've also lost possible viewings due to his insistence I stopped all viewings and the house was removed from the market - saying that, I can still see it on Rightmove. It's so out of my control.

Thanks for the Skoda tip, they are rather smart nowadays aren't they!

I've babbled, I only popped on to say I completely agree about not having any 'meetings' in your house, when we moved here in 1999 I was immediately voted in as Chair of the Playgroup and the PTA. I had to have twelve or so women here every month, supply tea/coffee/biscuits - we'd hardly unpacked. I used to spend all day cleaning and rearranging the 'seating', I didn't enjoy it at all.

craftyone Wed 04-Dec-19 19:31:47

I was just thinking about the putty. That was the standard way of sealing windows when I was young. I remember my dad doing it all the time on the old wooden sash windows. He did it whenever glass was replaced. Maybe the drier weather or cold has made the wood shrink slightly, that is what wood does. It absorbs moisture and then loses it so really the joiner working with the painter did a decent job because putting putty on the slightly expanded wood meant that it would have shrunk and slightly moved the putty. I think that is how it works

mosaicwarts Wed 04-Dec-19 19:30:56

I've just had an email from the EA saying 23 million people look at Rightmove on Boxing Day and would I like them to market my house! Ha ha, you'd think they'd be more selective with their mailing list!

I'm scared to jinx it Whiff, I'm a sitting duck I know, but I'll wait until next Tuesday and if no news then, will phone again.

The painter was kind to do that, I was just irritated that the joiner has only been here for 3 hours and I thought he'd made sure the glass was secure before he left the painter to paint them. The painter also bought the logs up for me as I was out when DPD delivered to the bottom step, I gave him some beers. I did give him a beef sandwich today so he'll keep his strength up, still got a dumpy bag of wood that needs to come up! ;)

craftyone Wed 04-Dec-19 19:24:08

I disagree. I think it is better to wait, otherwise the purchaser will have more ammunition to request a price drop ie a very anxious seller. Best bet might be to phone your solicitor to ask if there has been any contact. Its a bit of a war of steely nerves and who will break first. Like that staring game we all played

Have a look at skodas mosaics, I have had skodas for many years now, none of them have ever gone wrong and now dd and her husband have a skoda each. The main thing is that they are very safe cars

Any U3A group I join will have to be somewhere rather than in each others houses. The neighbour`s house I went to the other day had that sofas/chairs/side tables set up that is perfect for U3A meetings. Mine is not a bit like that and anyway they were saying how they preferred my porch to my neighbours and to be fair I don`t want any discussion on my house, my furnishings, colours etc and ok I am not a tidy person anyway

Whiff Wed 04-Dec-19 18:54:49

Mosaicwarts Franbern is right. The estate agent works for you. Try a phone them tomorrow and if they don't have answers you need to ask everyday until you get some. I know it's not easy , but living in limbo is worse. When looking for an area to live as you don't like driving try and fine somewhere where you won't have to drive every day. As a non driver I am glad to have bus stops at the end of my road. Also having the free bus pass saves a lot of money also taxis here are so much cheaper than West Midlands.
That was kind of your painter to put the putty in for you.

mosaicwarts Wed 04-Dec-19 18:40:56

Evening Franbern, I did phone the EA on Monday, they said they don't follow people up after they've had a survey. I'm left assuming he had verbal feedback last week, and is waiting for the typed up version, which will be very long. I will have to practise patience with a capital P, and see what happens. I am continuing to find evidence of the surveyor poking at things - he's rubbed paint off the radiator pipe, I'm assuming he was checking it is copper.

I felt a bit upset earlier by the painter - before he left he said the window glass had dropped a few millimetres, but he'd sealed it with putty. The whole point of having the joiner was to stop the glass falling, why am I left with a painter with a pot of putty. Give me strength.

We are going car shopping on Sunday - was supposed to be tomorrow, but I have to take my own car in as I think I might have a hole in my exhaust. I don't drive fast or far enough and after the very wet then cold snap, could smell the 'blocked exhaust' smell again. The worst thing about the scary drive is the wait to see if I have to do it - I won't know until 9.45 pm when she gets to the station.

I can't wait to join a U3A group, what fun for you. My daughter did Theatre Studies and English, I love going to see her either acting or directing plays. Directing is her first love, writing and acting next. When she did a year out in Canada out of all the students she was chosen to play Macbeth - unfortunately I couldn't afford to fly back out to see her in action and the promised video never materialised. My husband passed in the May, she went over there in the August. She's been in many plays as men, which has been difficult with such ringletty hair to tame. Enjoy Franbern - and break a leg!

Franbern Wed 04-Dec-19 18:17:40

Mw, do ring your Ea's, they should be on this for you. Although, the longer there is no comment, the more likely it is to be good news, but you need to have that confirmed.
Thought you were looking for a car for your daughter to use, so that you do not have to do this (for you) scary drive.
This morning attended a special introductory coffee morning for my U3A drama group. Have not been involved in AmDram for nearly sixty years. Really enjoyed this morning and will be going weekly in future.

mosaicwarts Wed 04-Dec-19 13:28:22

Afternoon from the house of horror, painter is here again and my dog can't stop barking sad

I told him I'd be an hour when I left, and am angry that when I came back he'd forced the locked gates open to gain access to the scaffolding at the back. They are very fragile and I don't touch them if I can avoid it. From the few conversations we've had he is just a hard working father of five, he is trying hard, I must not criticise, he was just trying to get the work done. I didn't expect him to be doing so much of the filling work - he told me he is self taught. I've just transferred the huge chunk of money I have to pay out, I feel slightly sick.

Still no news from the EA, I do feel like having a good cry whether it's a yes or a no. It's possibly the twenty mile scary drive again tonight to collect my daughter, argh!

Whiff Tue 03-Dec-19 17:14:59

Ellianne terrible thing to happen. Don't know how parents cope with the loss of a child.

Franbern Tue 03-Dec-19 16:18:43

Yes, Ellianne, I do know that school pretty well. Such dreadful tragedy for parent of child that was killed. Silly, to say, but somehow, the death of a child - so close to season which is so much a children's festival - must be even harder for them.
Mw, there is always sadness and tragedy somewhere in the world - does not make your own stress and worries any the less significant for you. However, the fact that it is now over a week since that survey, and nothing has been said by the would-be purchaser does seem to bode well. Think you are being marvellous in not nagging your EA for some sort of reply. I lasted just five days in similar circumstance (had meant to wait the week - but could not).
Perhaps you do need to start mentally preparing yourself for moving within the next three or four months.

mosaicwarts Tue 03-Dec-19 15:04:36

So sorry Ellianne, big hugs, too many tragedies at the moment. Makes my situation seem so insignificant, I do count my blessings.

Jane10 Tue 03-Dec-19 10:52:30

What a terrible thing Elianne. I'll never understand what goes on in the heads of people like that. Those poor souls. sad
Sorry for intruding on this thread. I lurk, always hoping for the best for mosaicwarts

Ellianne Tue 03-Dec-19 10:19:18

One step at a time with acquaintances craftyone and being the new person at a Christmas lunch would I think be awkward! Do the U3A groups meet in people's homes or at a venue? I'd rather be on neutral territory but then costs of hiring places have to be taken into account.
Horrible morning for me as yesterday afternoon a car deliberately drove into a crowd of children from a school I recently taught at. Franbern will know the area. One 12 year old was killed, several other kids injured. Awful. Apparently he drove to a different school nearby first but they have railings across the front. There was a night time vigil in a church. When they showed the pictures on TV I broke down as it was the church where DD was married and DGD christened. Now I am 200 miles away I'm finding it very hard.

craftyone Tue 03-Dec-19 10:01:16

mosaics flowers

I have to turn or flip my mattress every quarter. I have numbers 1-4 on the ends so I know what to do but it isn`t half awkward and heavy. We bought them 8 months before dh died ie autumn 2014, they each have a definite life of 10 years so I have 15 years left of good mattress. Hypnos singles on top of hideaway storage bases. So I will be 86 when they expire. They are very heavy, I am ok still to do the job but I can see me getting help one day. Next time, I am getting a very good adjustable wide single bed and I will get them to remove both beds from here. Naturally I will have to have downsized some more by then, to re-position everything that is under the beds. I was also thinking that this is the time when I will be organising a good age-related bathroom

Having said that I did meet several ladies of 80-90 on sunday and most were mobile and feisty so there is hope. One very kindly came to my house to post U3A info through my door, including her telephone number and I have been invited to their lunch on friday. I will ring and thank her later but am not going to the christmas lunch. I have to be oh so careful and need to pick my groups gingerly. The easiest way is by stepping back for a bit longer. I already told them I would be stepping a foot into the water in may. They were lovely, really were but I am truly not ready

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