Help calm me, house buying and selling stress part 2

One other thing I've just remembered craftyone; when I was in the showroom, choosing the walk in shower, it was pointed out to me that not all shower bases have a non slip surface meaning that, if you choose one that isn't non slip, you'll have to have one of those plastic/rubber mats that get mouldy and a bit minging over time. I'm glad that it was pointed out to me because I hate those mats and so chose a non slip shower base. can't think why all shower bases aren't non slip though.

Hope everyone had a good Christmas. On the subject of walk in showers. In my old house had one with a handled fixed to the wall. Here there is a walk in shower hate the shape no door and it is 3" to step up to get in. There are 2 handles but they are in the wrong position for me. Ok to grab to get in and out. Having new shower room next year. Already decided to have a vertical and a horizontal handles drilled into the wall. And to have a wall attached folding chair with legs and arms that way when my balance is off I can still shower. Also having a handle fixed to the wall by loo not that I need it now but since my illness started we always planned for future years needs. My son suggested that I have something at hand height for shower stuff whilst standing and one for if I am sitted Like most things in life we have to plan ahead.

Happy New year to you all.

Well, I viewed my first house today -first for years that is. It was a flat. With all your useful tips I knew what questions to ask and hope I didn't send the prospective sellers into too much of a tiz.

It was nice but too expensive for what it offered and it is in a rather awkward position with a narrow access, shared. and a small garden, also shared..

People don't get that you never recoup what you've spent on a place so shouldn't try.

This flat has been on the market for 6 months and they've had an offer but I guess it was a low one.

I think I made it clear that it was early days for me and I didn't want to raise their hopes. I hope they sell it but it won't be to me.

Re showers versus bath.
About 10 years ago I went on holiday to Puglia in Italy. The hotel room had an en-suite shower which I have never seen in the U.K. There was a step of about 12 ins. to get into the shower and there was also a shelf about 12 ins high inside the shower. One could have a normal shower or put a plug in and sit on the shelf and then the shower became a sort of hip bath.
I think that this type of shower could be popular especially when space is at a premium because nothing beats have a soak in a bath, especially when we need to soak away aches and pains

First of many grammaretto, yes a house is only worth what a buyer will pay for it. Good luck, viewing is indeed exciting

Maytime2 yes a good idea but personally I have not had a bath for years and would not miss it and the step up would defeat the purpose. The alternative would be one of those up and down seats but my bath is much longer than me and I could never lie back. I would be much happier with a walk in shower. Non-slip is noted. I will talk to my plumber in due course, he must have installed lots and yes grab handles and a flip down seat will be included

I am not going to jump in feet first, I need to look and ask and maybe get in touch with ageuk for ideas too but I do know that I will future proof my bathroom

ok, before I make any decisions. I have found some bath lifts that look pretty ideal for having a bath. The reason I haven`t had a bath is because I would not want to be stuck in the bath. For less than £200 I think I will get one, it is re-chargeable. Maybe that will do for now. Trial and error

My Sister had her bath removed and a long walk-in shower , she loves it ,
The only flaw is the fold down seat has been installed far too low. The man putting it in refused to listen to her . It is so low that if she tried sitting we guess her knees would be up round her chin !

We have a bath lift for DH and it is a life saver. Means he can have a bath (under supervision!) but can get in and out in safety. Easier for me to dry him while he sits out of the water and with his feet on the floor. Ours cost around £300, rechargeable battery operated, and I high recommend it.

I have ordered a bellavita bathlift after seeing the youtube video. It lifts right to the top of the bath so will be ideal for if I cannot step over the bath from the shower. Now I have done that I will be looking forward to having epsom salt baths and being able to recline because it will make the bath shorter and much safer for me. What I do like also is that it weighs only 9kg and can be lifted out of the bath for when I have visitors

The spare tiles cost me only £30 and are nicely tucked away, so no worries about future matching as they are just glossy white and very big. I am very glad I came on here to ask opinions, talking it through helped me to reach that decision. The lift cost me £199 and was price reduced. I am not going to bother the plumber now

Craftyone glad you are all sorted. Been told today by my gp I have heart failure. After shocking both my daughter and myself found out its not as bad as it sounds. Having chest x Ray and ECG Monday. Being referred to cardiology. Luckily it's at the same hospital as I am waiting for neurology appointment. Told my kids a few months ago that they would rue the day I came to live closer to them. Both said they are glad I did so they can help me. One very lucky mom.

whiff I remember when my mum came home and said she had heart failure and the same when my husband had that diagnosis. Really it is ok to live with, once you get over the actual words which sound much worse than it is

Craftyone thank you for that. I'm not going to worry about it as until I get the test results and see the Cardiologist there is no point. Whatever happens I will get on with it. My brother had a stent put in his heart 9 yrs ago and it made a vast difference to him. Before it he got out of breathe after he could have run a marathon. Hasten to say not something he would do. 2 things in my favour I've never smoked and don't drink.

Not long now until 2020 . Hope you all have a good one and everyone who is moving gets the new home of their dreams.

Hello everyone, lovely to read all your news.

Whiff, I'm so sorry to read your news, it is such a bad choice of words, it's just not working as efficiently as it was. Thinking of you, let us know how you get on with the cardiologist and neurologist.

My daughter has gone to Belfast to spend new year with her boyfriend, so I should be doing things but I feel so tired and miserable.

I won't know if the buyer can get his mortgage until I have the damp/timber specialist here on 8 January, and feel so nervous as to what the report will say. When I spoke to the EA regarding all the very expensive 'urgent' works the buyer's surveyor said needed to be done, I asked how it would be possible - she said the buyer did have cash, in addition to the mortgage.

I know a house is only worth what a buyer will pay for it, but it's so disappointing this buyer wants it to make the biggest profit possible and obviously wants to beat me down to the lowest price he can get it for.

It's so difficult to value this house as it is unique. The buyer's surveyor told hm it would only be worth £450 when done up. I've been going cross eyed researching the 'market' trying to find a house like mine to find its value and compare prices, and it's all gobbledegook. You can get a five bedroom in this county for £1M in a nice area, £180K in a grotty area. My area is deemed to be 'nice' and most of the big houses have sold for £600K+. I have emailed my surveyor to ask if I can engage his services to value the house, it would at least give me peace of mind.

Interestingly the surveyor he used is also an estate agent, and they have a smaller railway station for sale, designed by the same architect, fully restored, for £340K.

What I've realised now is, that the buyer is highlighting all my condition problems to drive the price down, and not putting any value on my location, or large size. I am near the beach, village, and five minutes from the local railway station. We are also ten minutes from the motorway. I haven't seen any houses with architecture like mine, the painter's little boy asked if it was a castle

I'm feeling wobbly as to whether I should stay and renovate the house myself, I need to remind myself why I put the house on the market in the first place.

I thought your buyer had withdrawn Mosaicwarts or have I got confused and missed something?

I thought he had with drawn as well. And you had decided to sell at auction. If that's true why are you paying out for reports and valuations? From all you have said over all these months you need to move. You need a smaller home with double glazing , gas central heating etc. That way you don't have keep on worrying all the time. Also all your bills will be cheaper. My health problems have brought it home to me that moving to my bungalow was the right move not just financially but also emotionally.

Mosaicwarts I just wish you could move soon . There is a whole new life waiting for you. New people and experiences. Life is to short for what ifs. Hope you feel happier soon.

I can appreciate your dilemma mosaics I too would hate the feeling that my wonderful house is going at a knockdown price. I sincerely wish there was more competition. Our house is also too large and different and I wouldn't have a clue what it would sell for but I have to remember that when we sold our SD bungalow to buy it, we got more for the bungalow!! People are such sheep. They are scared of a project and as we know, big houses are expensive to run so it needs someone with imagination and enterprise as well as funds to buy it.
Whatever you decide, I wish you luck.

Thanks for your comments, the buyer did withdraw by email after thinking over being asked to increase his offer to £335K, having already increased his first offer from £305K to £330K.

The EA rang him and apparently he still wanted the mortgage survey to go ahead. It's the mortgage company asking for the damp/timber report before agreeing to the mortgage. I paid for the report so I can keep it, as I assume it will be bad, and he will be refused the mortgage and withdraw, then I can provide it to interested auction viewers. It is such a farce isn't it. I hope my surveyor agrees to give me his professional opinion, then I can go to auction fully informed. I had to laugh when the buyer's surveyor was here, we'd chatted whilst he'd washed his hands and I'd told him I was widowed - when I went up to clean the mess that had fallen out of the loft onto my bed, my Sheila Hancock book 'Just Me' was on the floor, he must have moved the bed to get the ladder in place. Looked like a sympathy 'plant'!

Thanks for reminding me why I started on this journey Whiff, I do have such an emotional attachment to the house, as do the kids, it blurs my vision. Talking of blurred vision, I won't be buying a 'large' rocksalt from Homebase again, nearly pulled my arms out of my socket lugging it upstairs!

Off to the shops to buy next year's Christmas cards - and I haven't had one from my Dad. I shouldn't be surprised, my SIL is now cleaning for him and probably said I wasn't worth a stamp. I don't have his phone number, not sure if he still has mine. Our contact is only twice a year at Christmas and birthdays, looks like that has ended now he is living two doors away from my brother.

Keep positive MW life will improve!

mosaics you have these words locked into your brain `what if` but for the wrong reasons. What if you did the rennovations? The stress, worry and cost, they could give you a stroke. You did seem mentally stronger a little while ago, ready to prepare for auction and ready to begin a new, comfortable and better life. It seems that people are saying things and their words are sinking into your brain, the EA, the `buyer` that is not a buyer, your children who want to stay but at your cost

Take the reins back, it is your house, your one life, the gateway to your new future. It needs courage, I think you have that courage but you also need determination and to be more single-minded. Spring will come and go and before you know it, you will still be in that mouldering old house come next winter

Oh Crafty, you are so wise and insightful. Such very good advice there MW, please heed it and know that we are all in your corner. The house WILL go this year. It WILL. may be sold, may be auctioned, you may not get as much as it’s worth, but what price is your well-being? The house is dragging you down, and Crafty is right, as always, your AC don’t really have your best interests at heart. We do. Sorry if it sounds harsh, but we need to keep steering you back on the right path

Duh. I meant it will sell in 2020! Just taken my Xmas decs down and it feels like a new year to me. We too live in a house much too big for us. Still comes in useful when AC AND DGC stay but most of the time most of the rooms are not used. We’ve lived here 30 years and it’s a 4 bed bungalow in a street of two beds set in half an acre of land. Nothing comparable nearby so lord knows how it will be valued. Costs a lot to heat and when we’re decrepit and can’t manage the massive garden it will cost a fortune to maintain. But the thought of a load of entitled snowflakes turning their noses up at it puts me off even thinking of selling

Thanks for the virtual kick up the derriere. I have always been an overthinker as well as being easily distracted. I will revert to my plan to find somewhere to rent, which as you so rightly say, I've diverted from.

My daughter has only been away a day and I am feeling 'alone'. I took my dog to the beach, came back and thought I might have a look at the sales locally. I am now the proud owner of a 'new' jumper from the sale at Joules, navy blue with white stars. I saw Mary Berry wearing something similar months ago, and coveted it! I had already managed to find a starry scarf, and now will be sporting the same 'starry' look! I will do the one in one out rule, have already sorted a big cardigan to go, as well as some jackets I haven't worn in forever Also got some lovely recyclable xmas paper, another Rescue Remedy Spray, and some brushed cotton bedlinen. Sales budget gone, but I'm delighted with my purchases!

I have done some endorphin shopping too mosaics, all online and only lots of great knitting wool from JL. I enjoyed buying it and will enjoy using it. I have an enforced ban now, just as well, I reported an unknown transaction on my cc and the card is now stopped. No more cc spends. I have transferred money to take the cc back to zero next week when I get the new number and from thence will behave myself and stop impulse buying. 2020 next year and a new start and a new decade

I have to get myself outside tomorrow, hope very much that it is dry. I am just watching a christmas tree miracle, love these moral gentle films. I lit the stove and got too hot, should have lit a candle but I wanted the light from the stove. I like some of you, feel that I am hopping from one day to the next

Ah craftyone, my credit cards were used too often. I've done that 'tarting' thing Martin Lewis recommends with two of them, so the debt is interest free, but I'm paying interest on the third. I need to sit down and sort all my accounts, I've let it slide with the christmas expense. Not looking forward to it, I'm not a natural when it comes to budgeting!

Hope you are outside on your bike having a nice time, I thought I would go mad with boredom last night. There are things I could have been doing, but I was too tired to concentrate on them.

I just popped in to say a house at the end of the row leading to the station is up for rent - it doesn't say they take pets, so as Ellianne suggested, I've asked the agent to ask if they'd consider me if I paid a larger deposit.

Horrible access round the back, so won't be great to move the furniture in, but I won't be taking much and can walk up and down with my boxes. Need a wheelbarrow again - someone had tried to take some of my hand cut sandstone wall and I rescued the huge coping stone ... as I was wheeling it down the road the tyre flattened, then damaged the wheel, I only just made it. I think the council tax is A or B, so won't be as frightening running two houses. Still oil powered though as we don't have a gas pipe near us. Will see what happens - and if I'm 'chosen'!! I still wonder occasionally about that - I wonder if it was because I asked about the lack of smoke/carbon monoxide alarms?

I've just had crumpets, didn't enjoy them, sort of doughy and greasy with the butter, don't seem to toast properly any more. Toaster probably on the way out - and when I had the cash buyer I gave away all my reserves from the annexe.

Have a good day everyone.

There are crumpets and then there are crumpets in my opinion! Some are just unpleasant even when cooked long enough. Morrisons crumpets are tasty though. Hope the next lot are better!