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Looking after my step grandaughter aged 1 year old

(11 Posts)
Summerlove Tue 05-Nov-19 13:42:01

I agree with Trisher, and think that choosing not to help out this next grandchild could be seen as favourtism.
That said, I think you deserve the time to yourself on your “long” weekends

Maggiemaybe Tue 05-Nov-19 12:53:18

Can your DH not help you? My DH and I do our childcare together and it really takes the pressure off - we can both have breaks! He enjoys it as well, as I do, and they all love Grandad. Looking after children on your own can be exhausting.

Perhaps he’s still working, or in poor health, but it’s just a thought.

trisher Tue 05-Nov-19 11:44:03

I agree about the days. You could put it quite tactfully to your stepson's wife, saying that you are getting very tired and wouldn't want to take too much on and make yourself ill. So if she could somehow work things so you had the 1year old between Mon and Wed you would feel much more confident as you would then have a good rest Thurs-Mon. I also wonder if the 2 year old might be starting playgroup or nursery soon and that would make things easier.

jeanie99 Tue 05-Nov-19 11:27:16

Just recently we went to my daughters for 5 days and I helped out with my GD of 11 months with the changing of nappies, feeding her playing with her, putting her to bed. Up and down stairs I was worn out by the end of the week.
I have no idea how old you are but you are doing a wonderful job helping out your family and caring for your GC.
I don't think there should be a difference though I have to say between blood family and step family.
If you don't feel you can manage the little one you should be honest with your stepson and say this.
Caring for a one year old is very different to having a 7 year old round to visit or even a 2 year old.

sharon103 Mon 28-Oct-19 21:01:31

I agree with pinkquartz.
I think you do enough. Kindly say that you are tired after three days. Don't take on more than you can cope with. Best to be upfront and honest.
You need your time too.

pinkquartz Mon 28-Oct-19 20:40:37

It's not a matter of blood or step child but that you sound stressed even thinking about it.
I think you should say no. Say that you are tired after the three days of childminding.

M0nica Mon 28-Oct-19 20:38:27

You need to tell everyone concerned that you can only manage to childcare Monday -Wednesday and will those affected work out how to share the time between themselves.

Do not give way to special pleading

Sussexborn Mon 28-Oct-19 20:36:45

Seems rather complicated and not sure if I fully understand.

My family might have had its failings but we always tried to ensure that any step children felt included and were treated the same as birth children. Could you have two children together on one day so you’re not refusing your stepson’s wife?

HildaW Mon 28-Oct-19 20:23:51

We are a family of Steps/Adoptions and second marriages on several levels...the idea of differentiating between 'blood' and 'non blood' has never occurred to me. To be honest I find the terminology a tad offensive.

grapefruitpip Mon 28-Oct-19 18:20:12

Is this real?

MooM00 Mon 28-Oct-19 18:17:16

Hello, I would like a bit of advice, at the moment I look after my grandson aged 2 one full day a week and one afternoon. I also look after my grandaughter aged 7 two afternoons a week after school. On these days I also take her to Rainbows and Gymnastics. This means I am child minding Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. I really enjoy the end off the week to myself. The problem is my Stepsons wife has now asked if I will look after my step grandaughter aged 1 for a full day on a Thursday. My husband never complains about me looking after my blood grandchildren 3 days a week which makes me feel a bit guilty as I am really feeling resentful at giving up another day each week. Do you think I should share myself to my step family and agree to looking after my step grandaughter to make it fair all round.