Help calm me, house buying and selling stress. Part 3

Neighbours! Another thing on the list to worry about if moving.
I'm early for the gransnet meetup so am having a coffee and reading your stories.
St Andrews is little America. A group of students are even out campaigning for Bernie Sanders.
My current neighbours are pretty good apart from sending me lawyers' letters about my stream wetting their grass and my ivy encroaching their wall.....but I think that's sorted now. They don't annoy us!! And they explained about the letters.

Yes, Ellianne, it was that hospital. I had worked there for some ten years, and was very much my local hospital. Both my parents actually died there, three of my children were born there, and one g.child also. It was very much home-from-home for me, despite its size. I thought to stay under the for the first of these appointments, which they say will need to be undertaken twice a year. Have now written to my new GP asking for these to take place locally. as I had made several other arrangements for those few days in London, and also am so looking forward to seeing my daughter and g.daughter, I will still be going to London.
When my children were young, my neighbours were an indispensable part of my well-being and several of them became life-long friends.
At my last house, I did know people in the Close, and my immediate neighbours were very pleasant, all were there when I moved in and were still there when I moved out. One, (two doors away), I will be going to visit whilst in London.
These flats are built from Weston stone, very solid and thick, no noises penetrate those walls, either from other flats or from outside. Do like to be able to look out of my windows and see buses and cars going along the road. Obviously, in the summer, when I will have windows open will get some outside noises.

Maybe because we intend to see out our days in our new home it is more important to meet nice neighbours and have chats etc. In our previous homes neighbours would come and go in rapid succession and they weren't particularly like minded people. There was little time to chat. A lot of it has to do with demographics and what suits us at one age doesn't work so well 20 years later.

perfect neighbours are there quietly, there if needed and nice to have a cup of tea with sometimes. Mine is ex-divorced and broke, was working in the EA office via whom I bought my house. EA wanted my financial details. Neighbour started to buy his very soon after me. If he hadn`t known my financial details I would not be so careful. So you see there is that bit of doubt. Having said that, he is very nice and very `helpful` would do anything I asked but there is just that something I cannot put my finger on

Re older man, every widowed older man I know has either got a ladyfriend or has re-married. Generally they are not as independent as women. Me, solo until I die

Shandy our dog has gone in for his teeth cleaning and extractions today. The vet is due to phone in a bit before they start the procedure. They do x rays first so they can work out the cost, (hopefully less than the £800 quoted!). Good luck for your cat tomorrow. A cat sitter is a good idea. We pay £12 for a daily visit.
Franbern that's so annoying about your London appointment. If it's the hospital I attended beginning with Wh X, they cancelled my follow up appointment and NEVER got back to me. I found it impossible to get through the switchboard to the right department. I would definitely try to get yourself under the local hospital for continuity of care.
Noise is a funny thing in that it reminds you there is life going on around. We have moved to a detached house in a very quiet neighbourhood and it is very different from living on the tube line in London in a terraced house on a flight path. I sort of miss those noises but not the random voices walking past in the early hours or the regular late parties in gardens.

Are you sure about Storm Eleanor? Our next named storm ( if there is one) is due to be Ellen. Eleanor was in January 2018.

I also like to the small sounds of life going on around me. Not keen if it's loud though. The girl upstairs doesn't seem to be making much headway with her oboe lessons despite her practising!!

Franbern sorry your appointment got cancelled . Are you still going to London? It's annoying when companies act as if it's your mistake and it turns out to be theirs. At least your bill will be cheaper for a while. Hope your get together is a success.

Must admit Shandy57 I do like to hear noises from next door. But have never lived in a detached house. Where I used to live my mom fell down a couple of my stairs. My neighbour heard and came right round. She is a nurse and looked after my mom while I called for an ambulance. So having someone the other side of the wall has some advantages. My neighbour not joined to my bungalow has a lovely German shepherd who only barks at other dogs. Always liked living next door to people who have dogs. He is huge but very gentle. No a pet person myself. But my son and family have 3 dogs and my brother has one. Always enjoy playing with them. Hope hear from electrician and roofer soon.

Wonder if there will be another storm after Eleanor?

Morning all, woke to bright sunshine today! One more tense day to wait before I have to be up early and catch my unsuspecting cat for her teeth cleaning and possible exraction.

Interesting to see your comments about neighbours, honestly Whiff, how very rude of that man, who does he think he is. I am not used to being amongst people and am happy to limit it to good morning/afternoon. I can hear next door's noises through the wall, which is really odd. My immediate neighbours are a young couple, and my daughter met them on Sunday - she had come home to go to her friend's birthday celebration and we were going out to the car. The set up at the back is quite odd - the man that bought all the land from the railway split it strangely. There is a yard then a cobbled path area outside the back of each cottage, then a mud road, then gardens, but they aren't opposite the cottage they belong to. Opposite the back of me is a large garden that also has an acre of land that runs along the river - and there were three deer in there last night! Can't tell anyone as the poachers will come. The owner is a nice couple, I'd already talked to the woman about the horses in the past as the horse died last March. I've offered her the sleepers from my garden, she's going up to have a look, she does have some but they are creosoted. I don't think mine were. Sadly they have an unneutered cat, so I am worried for when I let my puss cat out. I saw him this morning, he is a huge norwegian forest cat - he was stray here when they moved in. As there isn't a cat flap here, if I go away I think I'll have a cat sitter.

I've got to go up to the station after the beach walk and use the wifi before I transfer it, it takes two weeks. I need to cancel Sky and a few other admin bits. Haven't managed to get hold of the electricican yet about the extractor fan, and no sign of the roofer.

Have a good day everyone, I hope the wind drops, I didn't know Storm Elenor was coming until yesterday.



I

A couple of days before my move I informed EDF that I was going from a 3=bed house to a 2-bed flat, and was quite taken aback when they just dropped my monthly DD by £1 per month!!!!! At the end of my first three months here, I sent in my readings, and their computer stated the readings did not seem accurate. I knew they were, but they sent someone round to do a reading, which confirmed it. When their bill came in saw their problem, I had vastly overpaid and my DD was reduced to just £5 per month,!!!!
Know it will not stay at that - but nice for the time being.
I like being on friendly terms with neighbours and have actually put a notice on the flats notice board asking if people would like to attend a monthly coffee morning - I am hosting the first one in March. Be nice if a number do turn up I have noted that of the 25 flats in the block, nearly half of them are occupied by one person. Because of the way they are built, although there are five flats on each floor, that is divided up into two lobbies, so I have just two other front doors in my lobby, and rarely see anyone going in and out. Do meet up with people in the main lobby on the ground floor when coming/going and always pass pleasantries, but feel it would be nice to get to know some people more.
Feeling a little annoyed - my follow-up hospital appointment for next Monday has just been cancelled by phone - whole arrangement with me going up to London this weekend was for that purpose. Will now get future appointments transferred to local hospital down here.

Anoia thank you for the advice. I haven't checked the contents but I will . Luckily my home improvements man is very good. When the kitchen firm charged me for something I didn't order he quickly got the money back for me. I would have done it myself but he insisted on doing it for me.

You are so right about pushy people coming in different guises. Don't know if it's me or what but I seem to get pushy older men. No idea why. If I was a raving beauty with a prefect body I would understand it. But I'm short , plump, greying hair, wrinkles , walk with a limp and use a stick.

Decided not to go out today. Don't mind getting wet but we have got high winds again. Can't risk getting blown over again.

Stay safe everyone.

Hi Whiff, I haven’t posted on this thread before but have you opened the bathroom boxes and checked that the contents are all correct and not damaged. I trusted the suppliers and left it to the plumbers to open the boxes and it caused substantial delays when they found broken and incorrect parts supplied.
Be wary!

oh I meant to say that my energy bill has just arrived. £34 for electric and £32 for gas this month, they recommended a cheaper gas tariff for me and I have asked to increase my dd to £55 a month. Water was £101.

yes whiff I agree and pushy people can come in different guises. They can be apparently kind, us female singles need to keep the radar switched on at all times. It is so inwardly annoying, I am the one with the very active brain, the one who gets things done in my house and garden. I should not have to explain that I lift things for a reason ie to stay strong. I think that message sank in. They only see a little older woman, they don`t see a very financially astute do-er. I am glad you said what you did, the two of them will be kept at arms length outside my house. I do think they are trying to be kind but my gut feeling is not 100 sure, so they will never be bosom buddies, although I will always be kind and helpful. This is how I think neighbours should be anyway ie respectful of privacy but there if needed

Craftyone you were being honest. I am glad I read it. We all have to feel safe in our homes. I hate pushy people the ones I've met only tend to get one word answers to questions think they soon get the idea I don't want to be friends. One of my neighbours 2 doors up the other day told me I needed a walker. I just said no. Think he got the idea I wasn't pleased. I've been using a walking stick since I was 30 got a lot more years with it yet. I'm not to proud that when it comes the time for a walker I will get one but not yet.

phew whiff, at least you saw it before I got cold feet, so I now have some sound advice

I asked for a post to be removed I said too much

In general: how do you interact with new neighbours?

No you are right to be suspicious Craftyone it's what keeps you safe. I am friendly with my neighbours and always stop to chat outside my home. Haven't asked anybody inside. I am a private person and very independent. There are things I can't do but the children help or I employ experts. It's my way of feeling safe in my own home. All the years I've lived on my own I have never been frightened , I'm glad to say.

I love been on this thread I always learn something new. Didn't know you could have a defib implanted. Hope your husband SueH49 is on the mend soon. Decluttering is a thank less job. Thought I had done it all before I moved. Wasn't untill I unpacked all the boxes found more stuff to get rid of.

Glad your toe is feeling better Shandy57. That's good news about another viewing.

Had all the stuff for my shower room delivered today all safely stored in my garage ready for the end of March. If it's this windy tomorrow I'm not going out. Nearly blew me over earlier when I opened up the garage. Can't afford to get hurt again.

Take care everyone.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Thanks SueH49. As Steve's heart was damaged he obviously couldn't have one, I've just read all about it on Wiki. Such fantastic progress has been made with technology hasn't it. I hope your husband isn't too fed up he's got to go back in, best wishes for his recovery.

I've just had a call to confirm the fifth viewing on Saturday at 1 pm, so another weekend of entering the ghostly house to clean and light the fire! My toenail isn't quite as painful today but still hurts like hell when I put my boot on and when I'm walking, it'll be a week tomorrow. I will be much nicer to my toes and appreciate them more when it's back to normal. I hadn't realised how disabling it was going to be. I taught at the RNIB in the late 80's and many students were at the college because of diabetes sight loss - and sadly had also lost toes - in those days they had ugly rubber prothesis for their shoes.

Feeling a lot better now we have blue skies, I get scared when it snows, a feeling of being trapped, no idea why. I've got my dog's special food and some cream for my cat's tablets and thankfully she's had her second dose today, one more day to go.

Shandy, hubby had his defibrillator implanted in 2008. In 2015 they changed the device because the battery only has about an 8 year life span. the original leads stay in place though. It’s a bit more than keyhole surgery but nowhere as major as open heart surgery. Fortunately it has never had to shock him.

That's interesting about the automated wording Franbern
I've had a wardrobe (1950s genuine retro solid oak) on gumtree with no takers but I put a price on it, thinking it could attract a serious collector. One guy, who sells retro "mid century" stuff, wrote and asked if I had the matching chest of drawers. Otherwise nothing. Charity shops aren't keen on wardrobes. It's IKEA's fault. It's taking up space I need for DD's house contents which could arrive anytime.

I've not only given things on Freecycle, I've also rescued things. Oh dear no wonder I live in such clutter.

It is worrying about your DH, SueH I hope he is up and running very soon. Sending you virtual hugs.

My friend's son had an emergency appendectomy yesterday. He could have died but he is recovering . It is times like that when we just have to realise what truly matters in life.

I'm planning to go on a gransnet meetup tomorrow in St Andrews if the weather permits. We had snow this morning but it has cleared now.

Shandy and Sue, it can be very good for you to get rid of so much stuff. Mind you, I did this over four years!!! Made my own rule that I had not used some kitchen gadget for two years, or worn an article of clothing in three years, then it could go.
Some things I managed to sell, much was given away. Sue, do not know how it run in Australia, but we have local 'Freecycle' sites. When I first used the ones for where I lived (few years back), they were great. Also something called Gumtree, also localised for selling items.
However, when I used these before I moved I was getting quite a lot of replies all saying much the same thing 'Interested, please send piccies and dimensions' - [uzz;ed me as I always included at least one photo of item and all the dimensions and colour etc. My daughter pointed out to me that now lots of people have a system of automated replies to ALL adverts - usually using these or similar words, and then could trawl through all of those at their leisure every so often.
So, I stopped replying to any with that sort of wording - tried to find people with genuine interest. Found it better using a small local 'Second time around' site , Yes, everything about moving seems to be more difficult and stressful these days.
One of my friends is splashing out and having a new kitchen in their house - she is having to clear out all the cupboards and drawers in her existing one and has emailed me to say she cannot believe all the stuff she has in them.
I am a convert to soup makers - having always made them previously in a saucepan with a hand held stick blender. Love my small 'compact' one, so easy and quick and little washing up,
Do agree there is a money pit when we first move - which is why I keep advising Shandy to allow a goodly sum over after purchase and sale.
Here it has been a very wet morning, had my 10 year old g.son with me to assist with my Sainsbury shop as they always have the day following half-term as an Inset Day at his school.

Your soup maker is great craftyone, I might treat myself when I've sold but from what everyone has said I'm going to have to be very careful with money as I do have to buy so much. A nice woman on the WAYUP site is very fed up with her new bungalow as her house sale funds have now gone and she is having to dip into her precious savings. She's got a 'wet patch' on her new living room wallpaper, and her new shower is starting to smell of stagnant water. Somone recommended Age Concern UK to her, but my aunt asked for help cleaning the inside of her windows, and waited two days for the person, he just didn't turn up.

I wanted to tell you I have stopped worrying about the condition of the house. I couldn't sleep last night thinking about it. People that buy at auction know it is either because of condition or a seller wanting a fast sale, and the age and conditon of mine are really obvious. Water on the windowsills is to be expected as the windows need renovation. I do find it so hard being on my own, I hope my kids marry into larger families that will love and support them through life.

SueH49 I'm thinking of you too - I didn't know it was possible to have a defib implanted now, that could possibly have saved my husband. Hope it's not painful for your husband having it reconnected, will it be keyhole surgery? As for decluttering, it is so hard, photograph the things you find it hard to let go of so you have a visual memory.

Roll on spring, snowy slush now outside but I still feel hesitant to drive far. Walking up to the station to feed m,y birds, the robin will wonder where I am.

A lot of the thing I am getting rid of have been sitting in a cupboard for decades without being used. My rational for disposing of them is that had I used them over the time I've had them most would have been broken and so I would not have them anyway. This takes away the sentimental side of decluttering.