Help calm me, house buying and selling stress. Part 3

SIL phoned tonight when DD was here so she heard on the speaker phone that her Grandmas house was for sale, but she was ok about it I think, more than 6 people have expressed an interest, so they are having an open day.
I just feel that we are going behind MILs back, it was awful emptying her home, she has no idea about any of it, I hope that she doesn’t remember her home. She thinks that the Nursing Home is her house and that she allows the other people to stay there,
Even though she has really been a Real piece of work since I met her, I don’t feel good about the situation she is in.

Sounds like she's perfectly happy though. Don't worry about how she might have felt if she didn't have Alzheimers. Selling the house will keep her in a place where she is happy and content. She's forgotten about the house. You've done a good job getting it ready for sale. I hope it all goes straightforwardly.

I can understand your strange feelings Oopsadaisy but you have to be the responsible ones now. She has done her job. I'm sure it will work out fine . It's good that it will sell quickly by the sound of it.

Here, no house news except the scaffolding went up today though the men can't go on the roof until the weather improves. The roofer noticed a broken pipe and water is bubbling up from the ground. I noticed it before but hoped it was not important.

Meanwhile DD wants us to find space for their furniture.

I use wondergel to heal bruises and sore skin. It's like magic. It's made for horses and I get it from the country stores. It contains comfrey and other herbs.

Good luck tomorrow Shandy

I took H to see our rental place today. The Estate Agent met us there and although it was the standard 15 minute viewing we did have the opportunity to ask some pertinent questions and sort out a couple of things. I'm sure there will be many more before we settle in. We will have access a couple of weeks before moving in so that will give us time to sort through things beforehand.
H is happy with the place and I'm glad I saw it again as some things were better than I remembered.
The Agent told us there had been a lot of interest in the place and they had received many applications. I'm surprised we were approved. However, I suspect that news of our property sale and the suburb record price we received is well known among the local estate agents.

H is doing quite well after his op. He has been able to do more than either of us thought but after a couple of days I think he is beginning to realise that he cannot keep that up at this stage. The biggest positive for him is that he is getting a decent nights sleep which he was not doing in hospital or rehab.

Summer has returned after a week of torrential rain and thunder storms. Today the sun is out and everything seems so much brighter

SueH49 glad you husband likes the rental and is on the mend. You probably already know this from after your hip operation but watch out for post op blues. It can hit anytime after major surgery. Just our bodies way of saying slow down you need to heal ,relax and take stock. You have mentally and physically had a shock to the body. Didn't think it was a real thing till it happened to me after I had a total hysterectomy 23 yes ago. It was my choice to have operation so thought I would be ok. It was a shock when the Dr explained about it. As my usual way of dealing with most things said I didn't have time for this and gave myself a good talking to. I know that doesn't work for everyone as most things in life you have to find your own way through trail and error. Hope the fires don't start up again.

Shandy57 hope you had a good night's sleep and recharged your batteries ready for the viewings. Thinking about you today.

Grammaretto hope they can soon fix your roof. Sounds like you will be having a busy time making room for your daughter's things. Where's Mr Shifter when you need him.

Hope everyone else has a good day.

I hope today goes very smoothly for shandy. Sue you and H seem to have both turned that corner nicely, it is particularly hard for a working active person to have that heart diagnosis, to accept getting older. I am glad all is well

POA is such an important job, it isn`t a status symbol it is jolly hard work and it seems to me that everything is being done properly to keep MIL safe, happy and comfortable. Oopsadaisy I hope your feelings settle to acceptance soon. I am looking at my things around me and never want them sold but they would have to be sold in order to keep me in nice care, if ever needed and that is why I appointed my POA. The wheel of life stops for no-one, scary thought

I tossed and turned a bit last night, trying to work out how to make my scattered rubber stepping stones look more joined. They are super good and quite heavy, I lift and move when needed. I thought maybe to get very small nice slate slabs to make paths, like stems, from the side to the beds but they are far too big and massively more expensive than my rubber stepping stones. which are 18" and made from re-cycled tyres . So I have ordered another 14 because I panicked in case they run out and they need to match what I have, my favourite company has run short, I found another company. I have future work, will make curvy paths eventually with these brown circles bedded in bark. I have to source bendy edges but later when the garden is finished

Do we get a sneaky preview of your garden craftyone?
I'm intrigued by the rubber stones.
There's a shortcut across our back garden into the kitchen and i worry about falls. At present there's just slippery grass. Would rubber stones work I wonder.
I am relieved about your rental property SueH one fewer worry.

Morning everyone, just popping in to say hello before I go up to the Station to clean. My cat is confined to the lounge and upstairs, when I go out I shut the kitchen door, but this morning she's been showing a lot of interest in the fireplace again so I've blocked it with a big box. Last thing I need is a terrified sooty cat running round ruining the magnolia paint! I can't risk losing her at this great age, I will keep her in for at least two weeks.

I'm lucky we have less wind, and sunshine today. When I go back to the house I feel very odd, I don't feel at home here or there now. I've still got so much 'stuff' there I need to sell and give away, plus essentials that I forgot when I moved down here. Things will be better when my toe has healed and I can move faster.

Keep your fingers crossed one of them likes it today. I felt panicky last night I only have five viewings booked in, but there is still time isn't there. Hopefully I'll wake up from this nightmare!

5 viewings! That's a lot Shandy57 and booked quickly. Hope the weather stays OK. Its varying widely up here today. One minute dark and snow and the next bright sunshine! A bit like life really (she said philosophically!)

Shandy, it is good that you are starting to 'detach' from The Station as your home. Obviously, you are not regarding the rental as anything other than a temporary port in a storm. When you do sell The Station, and then purchase your new home, that is when you will start to make that psychological movement of thinking of somewhere else as'home;
Five viewings at this stage seems pretty good - there is a still more than a month to go to the actual auction. You are unlikely to know how these viewings have gone until that date, a long time waiting - but hopefully worth it. In the meantime, you have the time to get rid (Selling or giving away) many more items. You do need to take down to the rental all the normal everyday sort of stuff that we need. It is the rental where you will be for the next five months. Did you manage to sort out the heating control????
In this flat that is at the side of the boiler - unfortunately, the icons on it are so small that I have trouble seeing them (even with my glasses on). My Daughter set it for me, and I just control it from the thermostat which is separate in my Living room. As the flat is so warm, do not need it on for long. Mentioned this to the British Gas maintenance man when he came to do the annual check, and he said I should just keep the timer as it is and use the thermostat to control as and when I want heat. There is a switch where I can can just turn it on outside of the set timings.
Yesterday I had the electrician fit an outside light on my large balcony - with on/off switch behind the drapes on the patio door. As soon as Easter has gone, I will be needing to really get down to sorting that out and getting some furniture and pots - both for real plants and for some fake ones.
I am recovering after a very busy and enjoyable half term. Next weekend I am in London for a few days as I have a follow-up appointment at the hospital there from my operation, and will take the opportunity of going to a couple of my old groups - bought some nice tins of biscuits at Longleat to take to those.
At present the rain has dried up and it is bright and weak sunshine =have to go down the road this morning to collect prescription from pharmacy - I ordered two repeat items on line yesterday morning, and the pharmacy phoned me in the afternoon to say they were waiting for me to collect!!!
Except for having the bathroom done (at end of April) I am now reaching the end of that time of spending lots of money.
Shandy, do take into account that you will need to do this when you do finally move into your new home. Paying to have tradesmen do things - I have had to have points in my kitchen, new light for the kitchen, moving around the entry phones, aerial extension to give me tv in the bedrooms, having my garage door electrified, plus all the buying of new 'whites' and other cooking equipment. As well as as other new furniture (dining table and chairs, bedroom furniture), fitted wardrobes, etc. It really is true as they say, that you do need to allocate a goodly sum for all of this during that first six months to a year in your new home.
I will still have to consider whether or not to have new carpet down throughout, or other flooring, and probably decorating -but is not urgent and I am happy to leave it for at least another year.

I echo what Franbern says about having the money to spend on your home once moved in. The man who did my new kitchen does all home improvements and pointed me in the right direction of the firm's he uses and I've had really good discounts as I had his trade discount. Which I've had on the kitchen units, tiles and flooring, also shower room things including all the tiles and the 6 new doors I'm having. It was my decorator who told me about him as he had him do his bathroom.

5 viewings is a lot but as someone said people may be at the auction who haven't viewed but are keen to bid for your house. Once I accepted the first offer on my house and had my offer accepted on the bungalow I detached myself from my old house. Also with all the packing and my things in boxes didn't feel like home anymore. I was very unsettled until the exchange and completion on both properties. Once I got the keys to the bungalow I felt at peace. You will sell next month and the mean time you can think about what sort of property you want and where. And set your self a budget of what you are willing to pay. Also what you would be willing to do in your new home and more importantly what you are not. List time again .

Craftyone where did you get your rubber stepping stones from?

I hope you have some enjoyable catching up next week with your friends Franbern and that the follow up is good.

Shandy 5 is excellent and every serious auction go-er will be keeping their cards very close to their chest, they will not breathe a word to EA or to anyone out of their own circle. If interested, they will keep a low profile and may well start bidding after the initial bids. My feeling is that you will be very pleasantly surprised

The rubber stepping stones were non-slip when it was icy, they are thick, do not need an underlayer, can be moved and are 18" diameter with a rough embossed log pattern and crinkled edges. Mine were £9.99 each and they have much cheaper ones which are a bit thinner. Looking at paver prices, the rubber ones worked out much cheaper, so I am looking on it as garden/moving- in expense. I made one long curvy path this morning, placed them about 6" apart, I just need to flatten the underlayer on some. They look nice like that so I will make another winding curvy path which will enable me to reach most areas without stepping on soil to hoe. I am not going to use edges or bark, I may interplant tiny lavenders, or not. Greenfingers or primrose have them

Hello everyone, I am back in the cottage. What a morning, as soon as I got to the house the sky darkened and it started snowy rainy hail. Went inside and heard a strange noise - the extractor fan has finally hit the dust. Well, part of it has, it was hanging from the string outside the window waving around. It's probably 1960/1970's and still has the electric attached so I couldn't do anything. The wind is so strong the fan bit is going round fast and is invisible.

I also had water on the windowsills, so went round mopping it up, I must have slept through some very heavy rain last night. I left the viewing agent a note to apologise for the wind in the kitchen, I'll try and contact my electrician this week. I think he's out with my roofer!

I lit the fire when I arrived at 10 am so it would have a chance to warm up, and left at 11.30 am, just as the first viewers turned up. I thought twice about inviting them in, but I just can't bear doing viewings, so very rudely drove off!. I took my dog for a walk, went to McDonalds, then the beach for a quick sand blast. I came back at 1.25 pm to switch everything off and a couple were standing in the drive with the viewing agent - I just drove past and parked up the road. She'd left me a note saying viewings went well, people loved my beautiful house, which was nice

How thoughtful to leave you a note Shandy. I know it doesn't matter if they aren't going to bid but it's so good for your morale.
Typical about the fan too!!

I swear inanimate objects have a secret life.
You were talking about cord-free vacuums and I didn't join in because I am not very happy with my Dyson. It takes a quick look at the dust, picks up a little and then groans and peters out. It's lightweight yes, but more of a toy and has been gathering dust itself..

Xmas 2018, my children purchased the two G Tech cordless vacuum cleaners. First one is upright - very light, yet powerful, easy to empty and easy to charge. Second one is a hand held one, used to be great on my stairs in the house, still has lots of uses, from a quick clean up of a small area (electrician used it yesterday for dust he had made doing the wiring for external light), also use if for my car . Again, light to use, yet pretty powerful and again, so easy to charge. Over many years I have had many vacuum cleaners, Dyson, Hoover, Henry, Electrolux - some upright, some not -but can honestly say that none have ever come close to being what I have been looking for - until these GTech ones, I can find nothing at all to complain about with them -the upright has a handle that can be lowered for storage in a small cupboard if necessary). No bags to purchase, but so easy to empty straight into waste bin. Would recommend them to anyone looking for a good, powerful, light weight cordless machine. (No...I do not have shares in the company - wish I did).

Oh!! This must be the longest time between posts that this thread has known since Craftyone started it. So, am putting something here, just to bump it back it to its rightful position near (or at) the top of this subject.
Friday, I finally got my outside light fitted up on my balcony. Switch to it, just behind the curtain (drapes) on the patio doors. This will be pleasant to use on Summer evenings.
Shandy, hope your toe feels much better now, and that your cat is settling down in the new home,
Sue so glad you have a rental sorted out now for your and hubbie - hope he continues his recovery well.
Do hope that anyone caught up in the horrible system of buying and selling property and moving home (which must be made even worst in many areas with the current weather problems), is continuing to find help and back-up with this thread

I heard on the radio that there are proposals to build thousands of new houses on flood plains. What on earth! it is all about profit. I hope that buyers are extra diligent, do research about the area and flooding, not just the house. It seems that rivers flooded to a couple of miles away from them and surface water is also very bad. A lane where I last lived always got badly flooded from field and brook run-off

I honestly don`t know how people can get over being flooded with all that dirty water, I could never cope. It seems that water came in very fast and that some properties were not insured. The levels have fared well since the flood measures were put in place, they took a long time and there were many traffic diversions. I met someone who sold at 1/2 the value because they could not live with it. Their insurance company were very good, she said. They got so little that they bought a renovation that they are having to do themselves, no fun at almost 70

I have been pottering, digging a bit and putting composted bark down and forking it into soil, to aerate it ready for lavenders. It is an indoors day today, plotting and planning in my new garden notebook

Morning all, we've woken up to snow in Northumberland, I'm so surprised!

It's turned to rain now so I know the windows will be leaking up at the station, I'll have to go up for a mopping session later. A trivial problem looking at the floods all over the country, I do feel for these people and cannot imagine how I'd cope.

I'm so nervous of driving in snow and have to take my cat to the vet early on Wednesday - the school bus has got stuck on the route I take this morning. I'm just going to walk my dog up the road, I'm not going to drive to the beach this morning, if I get stuck there it's down a long country lane.

Glad I put new windscreen wash in the car yesterday, but I haven't got my snow shovel down here if it gets worse. There's always something I need - candles are at the main house too, I did bring a torch.

Be careful out there!

snow driving is not pleasant, unless in a land rover, when it is relative fun

Its a proper dank day today, raining, dark, chilly, so easy to not do anything. I sorted pillows this morning, the floppy over-arm test and two are destined to go. I have been waking up with sore shoulders, last night was better on my new nanu pillow but the reviews say that it soon goes flat, won`t be oredering another one. I have ordered a goose down firm pillow with everything crossed, I don`t particularly want to add artificial pillow filling to landfill in future. I think I will be able to wash it in my machine, I got a bigger one because I wanted 1600 drying speed. Its a good machine, weighs my things and adapts itself

I took the soup maker out pronto, I feel a cba day wrt food. It is filled and ready for a good nourishing soup for my last meal and 3 more days. I would definitely not be doing it the old way of pan and blender. Lunch is a hm ready meal with veg. I get mouth hunger on days like this, want to munch on sweet things things

I've been continuing my clear out. It is amazing just what one finds in cupboards that have rarely been opened over many years. It doesn't seem to matter how much "stuff" I give or throw away, the impact is hardly noticeable. I guess in time I may see the impact it has had. I do think I need to be more organised and start in one room, complete that and then move onto another.

I've given up trying to sell things - little or no response in that so I'm now putting them up on a Community Free Stuff Noticeboard. Things that I expect to be snapped up often are not and other things that I don't think anyone would want go very quickly. I do find it annoying that some who say they want the goods simply don't turn up to collect them.

Have to take hubby to the Cardiologist tomorrow. It seems that during the by pass op one of the leads to his defibrillator was compromised. An alarm was suspended for 14 days, now that is up the alarm is going off at 10am. So back to have that sorted tomorrow. It never rains but pours.

Craftyone, I have pillows that are half and half duck and goose feathers. They do not seem to flatten at all - or at least permanently. I've been using them now for over 2 years and a quick fluff up and they are back to normal.

Stay safe everyone.

Thanks for that about the pillows Sue. It wasn`t cheap so that is re-assuring. I am sorry that your husband has to go back, I hope it is an external thing to be fixed

I know what you mean by getting rid of things, its not easy, I remember that loft full of things that the children might want, no, they never did want. In the grand scheme of things, we depart life with nothing and we come with nothing so in the end, really, everything is expendible or so it is in theory. It soon adds up again after a clearout. I gave a couple of good things to a builder on site last week, they were for his daughter setting up her first home. That gave me a warm glow

So now, with the rain battering on the window, I am mid seed -sorting and listing in my book. Seed sowing time is quite soon and I want to fill a vegtrug poppy with salads to sit by my house. Another will have small tomatoes and a few herbs. Planning is half the fun. I still have one aching shoulder after gardening work, am taking herbal mix for joint aches including willow and devils claw. I buy it as a tincture and it works but like all herbs, needs to build over a couple of days. I never ache while lifting or carrying, just a day or two later

A lot of the thing I am getting rid of have been sitting in a cupboard for decades without being used. My rational for disposing of them is that had I used them over the time I've had them most would have been broken and so I would not have them anyway. This takes away the sentimental side of decluttering.

Your soup maker is great craftyone, I might treat myself when I've sold but from what everyone has said I'm going to have to be very careful with money as I do have to buy so much. A nice woman on the WAYUP site is very fed up with her new bungalow as her house sale funds have now gone and she is having to dip into her precious savings. She's got a 'wet patch' on her new living room wallpaper, and her new shower is starting to smell of stagnant water. Somone recommended Age Concern UK to her, but my aunt asked for help cleaning the inside of her windows, and waited two days for the person, he just didn't turn up.

I wanted to tell you I have stopped worrying about the condition of the house. I couldn't sleep last night thinking about it. People that buy at auction know it is either because of condition or a seller wanting a fast sale, and the age and conditon of mine are really obvious. Water on the windowsills is to be expected as the windows need renovation. I do find it so hard being on my own, I hope my kids marry into larger families that will love and support them through life.

SueH49 I'm thinking of you too - I didn't know it was possible to have a defib implanted now, that could possibly have saved my husband. Hope it's not painful for your husband having it reconnected, will it be keyhole surgery? As for decluttering, it is so hard, photograph the things you find it hard to let go of so you have a visual memory.

Roll on spring, snowy slush now outside but I still feel hesitant to drive far. Walking up to the station to feed m,y birds, the robin will wonder where I am.

Shandy and Sue, it can be very good for you to get rid of so much stuff. Mind you, I did this over four years!!! Made my own rule that I had not used some kitchen gadget for two years, or worn an article of clothing in three years, then it could go.
Some things I managed to sell, much was given away. Sue, do not know how it run in Australia, but we have local 'Freecycle' sites. When I first used the ones for where I lived (few years back), they were great. Also something called Gumtree, also localised for selling items.
However, when I used these before I moved I was getting quite a lot of replies all saying much the same thing 'Interested, please send piccies and dimensions' - [uzz;ed me as I always included at least one photo of item and all the dimensions and colour etc. My daughter pointed out to me that now lots of people have a system of automated replies to ALL adverts - usually using these or similar words, and then could trawl through all of those at their leisure every so often.
So, I stopped replying to any with that sort of wording - tried to find people with genuine interest. Found it better using a small local 'Second time around' site , Yes, everything about moving seems to be more difficult and stressful these days.
One of my friends is splashing out and having a new kitchen in their house - she is having to clear out all the cupboards and drawers in her existing one and has emailed me to say she cannot believe all the stuff she has in them.
I am a convert to soup makers - having always made them previously in a saucepan with a hand held stick blender. Love my small 'compact' one, so easy and quick and little washing up,
Do agree there is a money pit when we first move - which is why I keep advising Shandy to allow a goodly sum over after purchase and sale.
Here it has been a very wet morning, had my 10 year old g.son with me to assist with my Sainsbury shop as they always have the day following half-term as an Inset Day at his school.

That's interesting about the automated wording Franbern
I've had a wardrobe (1950s genuine retro solid oak) on gumtree with no takers but I put a price on it, thinking it could attract a serious collector. One guy, who sells retro "mid century" stuff, wrote and asked if I had the matching chest of drawers. Otherwise nothing. Charity shops aren't keen on wardrobes. It's IKEA's fault. It's taking up space I need for DD's house contents which could arrive anytime.

I've not only given things on Freecycle, I've also rescued things. Oh dear no wonder I live in such clutter.

It is worrying about your DH, SueH I hope he is up and running very soon. Sending you virtual hugs.

My friend's son had an emergency appendectomy yesterday. He could have died but he is recovering . It is times like that when we just have to realise what truly matters in life.

I'm planning to go on a gransnet meetup tomorrow in St Andrews if the weather permits. We had snow this morning but it has cleared now.