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Help calm me. house buying and selling stress. Part 5

(1001 Posts)
craftyone Tue 28-Apr-20 12:43:38

Links to the first four threads

www.gransnet.com/forums/house_and_home/1274712-Help-calm-me-house-buying-and-selling-stress-Part-4

thread number 5

Shandy57 Tue 26-May-20 09:16:21

Morning all, I'm like a cat on a hot tin roof this morning, thanks so much for all your support, I hope I hear sooner rather than later. In the old days I'd have planned a holiday smile

craftyone Tue 26-May-20 08:53:26

Ellianne, an electric door?

craftyone Tue 26-May-20 08:52:04

the 4 properties that were up for sale before mine was put up for sale are still for sale, nothing else sold after mine, two years for some. They have all been reduced, given new dates and are well and truly stuck, everyone now will be looking at good reductions. I am very glad and relieved that I sold when I did

craftyone Tue 26-May-20 08:31:13

lovely to swap gifts of food franbern and yes you must take it easy, you too have been like a whirlwind.

Whiff I used a small ball that I had for hands, I had 5 in a bag and I picked the firmest, which was black so I made sure I used it against a brown door. From what I see, there is a wishbone shaped ball that people use to run up and down each side of the spine. I would say first whiff, to bend from the waist and try and touch the floor between your toes to relax some muscles and also stand on the edge of the bottom stair and lower heels to release the hamstrings. Lots of muscles work together and you have been doing heavy work

Ellianne Tue 26-May-20 08:28:09

Good luck Shandy, deep breaths until you get the call then let it all out. Today is the start of your new adventure ..... into the exciting unknown.
We are off out now because we have a new garage door being fitted and don't want to offer cups of tea and toilet facilities, plus the dog would probably see his chance to wander off. The garage door has one section which is a proper opening house door so we can use it for bins etc. It is dark grey with cut out windows at the top. I'm thinking it will look a bit too modern for the style of property we have, but I'm always one for being ahead of the times.
Have a nice day everyone.

Franbern Tue 26-May-20 08:24:33

Decided to take it easy today. Not going out, except to sit on the balcony. I was totally exhausted last night. So, catch up on some small normal housekeeping jobs. Daughter will pop by -bringing me some more of their spinach (I love this in my salads), and I will give her half a dozen of my belgium buns for her family.

The two geranium plants I purchased yesterday seem pretty healthy, and with this mixture of real and faux plants in pots on my balcony, even I sometimes muddle up what needs watering!!!!

Shandy, the day you thought would never come, has now arrived. Do let us know when the money goes through. It has been a long journey for you, and we have been with you for so much of it.

Whiff, I am expecting my bathroom man on Thursday afternoon, hope he may be able to give me at least a provisional date for when this work can start here.

Whiff Tue 26-May-20 07:53:56

Craftyone is the ball you use an ordinary ball or a special one and would it work on my lower spine?

Shandy57 I to will keep popping in to hear good news from you.

Went and posted a letter at 7 met another off my neighbours 3 doors from me . Had a natter and my neighbours from 4 doors up was just coming back from shopping. So had another natter. Lovely way to start the day.

Going in back garden later as weeds are appearing need to keep them under control.

Have a good day everyone.

craftyone Tue 26-May-20 07:22:11

Today is the day cupcake sunshine money in the bank shandy and a brand new start

I have been using a little ball in the right shoulder muscle, at the back and using it against a door, it makes a difference. I am sure that the muscle there is knotted. Today? back and forth here first, waiting for the good news

I decided to buy a dressform last night. Too hard to fit clothes on myself without one. I got rid of my last one before I moved, heavens I had it since I was 40 and it was too small with an immense amount of padding, took me 2 weeks to pad but I have found a lady valet, with good proportions.

MerylStreep Mon 25-May-20 17:53:47

Whiff
Yes I did. It's not finished yet but I made a good fist of it.
I love hacking stuff. So joy of joys there was a lot of that vine that strangles everything.

Whiff Mon 25-May-20 16:34:37

Franbern tired me out reading your post. Glad you have had such a good.

My aunt and uncle live in Llanddulas, Abergele . They moved there 3 years ago from Buckley, Flintshire. They love it. Wish they have moved years before. They are both in their late 70's.

Gardening certainly tires me out had a nap again this afternoon. Merylstreep did you do that gardening you mentioned last week?

Franbern Mon 25-May-20 16:10:46

Shandy, do not look back. Of course you did exactly the right thing selling when you did. Can you imagine how much you would have paid out over the last few months -and no guarantee that someone would come along and purchase it. You could have been stuck with it for a further long time. Just be grateful, that tomorrow brings that phase of your life to a satisfactory close.

Do not think you should be looking at somewhere because your late husband thought he liked it. Should be somewhere you like NOW - suitable for you for the future. Good road, trains near to buses, shops, etc. etc.

Franbern Mon 25-May-20 16:06:54

been a very busy day. Started to make my first ever Belgium buns, this morning. Had my breakfast, then got the mixture ready for first proving, before I went for a shower and dressed. Left that, and then the phone calls came. Firstly, from my sister-in-law, and we were having a long chat, and whilst that was on, a messaging video call came from one of my twins.

So, as soon as I came off the phone, returned that, and we chatted for a verylong time. Nice to see her little girls playing in their paddling pool in the garden.

Knew my daughter here was going to heach early afternoon, and wanted to be ready to join them. So, went into kitchen, yes the mixture was about 3 x the size it had started.

Just got that rolled out and put in my homemade lemon curd, etc and rolled it up, when a phone came from a friend in ireland, who had been trying to get in touch with for some time.

Managed to talk to her on the 'phone whilst getting the cakes cut into 12 pieces and put in baking tray ready for next proving. Finished that, made a quick sandwich for lunch, then saw I had missed a message from my daughter half an earlier saying they were of to the beach. Quick message to her, to arrange where she was now. Gobbled down sandwich, down to garage, on my scooter and I did manage to meet up with them.

Glorious weather. Yes, lots of people on the beaches, but so much space, they were all well apart in family groups. Nice to see the children getting good healthy sunshine on their bodies.

It was obvious for a long time that there was going to be more case down in the South West, as the numbers have always been so much lower than every other region - just catching up. Not blaming it on anyone. But hospital services can cope now.

Bought g.son an ice cream we went to some beachside gardens that were virtually empty - really lovely,near Knightstone if anyone knows the area). On the way back I purchased two lovely plants for my balcony in local shop.

Back home, cooked the well-proofed buns, 12 of them had to do them four at the time in my micowave oven. all came out lovely. Have now iced them, planted out those plants, and am relaxing.

ps; Funny story this morning. I have not used yeast for many years, totally forgotten how to do so. Bought packet of 8 sachets in Sainsbury this week, gave six, in the box to my daughter and I kept two sachets. This morning, suddenly realised that it was that box that had the instructions, nothing on the sachets. Had to phone my daughter to ask do I need to do anything to activate it. I did not - just put into flour and use.

craftyone Mon 25-May-20 15:43:10

I saw escape to the country today, full of places that I knew. We lived in the vale of glamorgan for over 30 years, in a village near cowbridge. We had to move down with work and we had no idea about the area. We stayed overnight at a hotel with the 3 children and first we went to the education office in cardiff, in those days you could get pretty good hints about schools. We were also told about green wellies and pointed to the vale of glamorgan. We put an ad in the local paper saying what we wanted and we had several good replies, we picked one of them and it was a very good choice

That couple were shown ogmore and southerndown beach. It is a tidal beach, not suitable for picnics and sandcastles but there are good walks around and a lovely coastal path. We used to take a pony for dd to ride along the beach when she was about 12. Ogmore, all I remember of ogmore is that it has a busy road in summer and there is a pumping station which stinks. Neath is also called neath port talbot, quite near the steel works. The best beaches are further west and they are outstanding. Best to speak welsh there

It has been a nice day today,as always lately, solitary and quiet but I am not moaning, would hate to be trapped with children. I expect the beaches everywhere have been packed, lots of locals visit WsM beach and Brean, I expect some of these visitors from the last couple of sunny spells have caused the hospital to overflow with c cases. I wonder how musgrove in taunton is doing and yeovil

Whiff Mon 25-May-20 14:17:23

Shandy57 stop second guessing yourself . You sold at the right time. You need to move to somewhere with a view of not what you need now but looking forward 5 even 10 years in the future. Try not to pick places that hold memories of your husband. You need a fresh start.

I was trying to get a hydrangea root out my front garden my neighbour saw me and came and did it and he took out the other one as well. Since moving here in August I have not met anyone I didn't like. As I said on a pervious post have a look at the areas up here. You will be surprised . Health care is excellent.

I haven't hear from my son since that email on the 4th. I will not contact him even if the test results show I have a whole in my heart. He says he loves me but that's a lie . He knows my health problems and he has proved he doesn't give a dam.

I am not wasting time wondering why he sent that email. It's his loss and he is punishing not just me but my grandsons. But we will have a reckoning but on my terms. His dad would be ashamed of him.

Ellianne Mon 25-May-20 13:50:10

Shandy, I don't think you were wrong to sell when you did. The viewing boom I spoke about is in London where many people need to get out of their rented properties that were only a stop gap anyway. I'm guessing the provinces might not be in the same boat.
Why is WsM closed with such a large number of covid cases? Is it because of all the visitors flocking to the beach? I saw a piece on sky news about 10 days ago which reported a big influx of day trippers. That's annoying.

Niobe Mon 25-May-20 13:38:39

I really feel for people whose loved ones have died alone. When my dad died he was in hospital and chatting to my son who happened to be the doctor on the ward. My dad died suddenly a few minutes later as my son moved on with his ward round. I was with my mum the night she died.

It was a huge comfort and consolation to us that at least one family member was there at the end for both of them.

MerylStreep Mon 25-May-20 12:35:22

Niobe
There isn't any other way. This has to end. Untold damage is happening in every aspect of people's lives.

Niobe Mon 25-May-20 12:31:45

There is going to be an announcement about further relaxing of lockdown later today. I hope it won’t lead to more infections and deaths but I don’t see any other way.

MerylStreep Mon 25-May-20 11:37:25

Franburn
You and I have been on the same page with this one right from the very beginning.
I commented on another thread that Boris basically kicked the lockdown into the long grass with the announcement of the easing of restrictions.

craftyone Mon 25-May-20 11:28:03

shandy, my daughter in wales has not been in touch for several weeks and she has never let me have their home or mobile numbers. Brought up the same as the other 2 and we were on very good terms but some AC just put a bubble/wall around themselves and do not allow any empathy into their lives. So be it, not point fretting, it is her choice not mine. I last saw her when I went to her house, 8 months ago and any appointments with me are always broken on the most trivial of excuses. I blame the childhood injections, she changed drastically at 4

craftyone Mon 25-May-20 11:23:25

Franbern, yes I like that you have forward plans to see people. It is like we have been forceably put to sleep for weeks

Shandy where is that intuition/gut instinct of yours? Women are particularly aware, listen to it, if instinct says doubt then the area is not for you. Frying pan and fire and you know it

WsM hospital has shut the hospital to all new cases of any type, they have a large number of c cases right now. Extra care needed Franbern, no slipping

Rest time now, I have been busy since 5 and know that my best time is am. I assembled the skeiner and if there is any recommendation when disasembling and that is to take photos/notes. I have used the skeiner hundreds of times but it took me too long to build today. I have made 3 fine skeins, 3 ply shropshire wool, all soaked in soapy water, rinsed and thwacked on the bench which straightens the fibre. They are drip drying outside

A recommendation, sliced long red peppers and onions, slowly cooked for about an hour. Finish with bit of thyme and a splash of balsamic. It is wonderful and keeps for days. 4 onions and 2 large peppers disappeared into one small concentrated bowlful

midgey Mon 25-May-20 11:22:40

Shandy perhaps your daughter daren't ring you, I think her anger was grief. I think too that you were a hundred per cent right to sell when you did, you are now ready to move on. Cornwall is very remote although beautiful, have a look at Staffordshire lots of pretty places and very well connected....and not as expensive as Derbyshire or Cheshire! Hope everyone has a peaceful sunny day.

Shandy57 Mon 25-May-20 10:31:21

Morning everyone, great to read all your news.

I'm really suffering with my hayfever, I must find the tablets! The oil seed rape is going over now, I'm surprised it's so bad today.

Sorry to hear about your daughter's pain Franbern, I hope she doesn't have to suffer it for too long. I've not spoken to or seen my daughter since the 'sold' phone call, eight weeks now. I've realised that she will always be angry I've sold the house, it doesn't matter when, how much or to who, it's just the loss of her childhood home.

I'm wondering with this 'viewing boom' if I've made a mistake and should have waited, I'll never know now smile I'm walking the dog in a minute, then I'm taking the ladder up to read the meter on my own, he barks at it and it's too high to risk him knocking me off. I'll be locking the letter box and put the letterbox key inside the house today, and tomorrow, when I hear we've completed, walk up and put the keys in there. It's been a long time coming, time to look forwards.

I have been trying to find my 'forever home' and I've been looking closely at Fowey as my husband loved it there - he even wanted to call our son Finbar after the Irish saint who passed through there on his way to Rome. But I get the same trapped feeling as here when I'm researching. Such a lot of driving to do things, public transport is dire. The nearest U3A is miles away at Lothwithiel, the supermarket a long drive - and it's so hilly. I don't like hills at all.

Enjoy your day whatever you are doing smile

PS second homers car was here briefly yesterday, fingers crossed he and his daughter have recovered.

Whiff Mon 25-May-20 09:40:25

Franbern like your plan. You have thought what to do. It's like my daughter and son in law who decided I had waited long enough to have the shower room etc done. And are having me to stay from Sunday for a couple of weeks while the work is done. Must admit it will be lovely having company. And touching them . So far we haven't touched apart from my grandson. We forget how important that is to our well being.

Did you see the drive through at the home think it was Dawlish. It was lovely . Families in the cars with visors on and a career with each resident person. Hope more homes can follow suit.

Soup made and washing pegged out. Just waiting for 10 and my chat . Then it's into the front garden. Then probably need a nap this afternoon.

Enjoy the sunshine everyone.

Franbern Mon 25-May-20 09:17:11

I have decided with my daughter to go to London in three weeks time. This means that I will be there the day following my g.daughters 17th birthday, and will stay over the following day for my 79th birthday. I have already notified all my children NOT to send me any pressies, not even flowers for this. Just want them to make arrangements to see me later in the year. After that couple of days with my daughter and g.daughter I will go to my Sister in Law for a few days. She is in deep depression and showing the early signs of dementia - she is really looking forward to me coming to stay for a few days. Then, I can go back to my daughters for one or two days, before returning home.

Will also, then be able to make arrangements to get my sister-in-law to come to stay with me a bit later in the summer.

I will drive there, no stops between leaving home and arriving at my daughter' house. Do not intend to go out anywhere when staying there, except her lovely garden. My sister-in-law lives in the middle of nowhere. Again, I will drive there, and stay there until I return to London. So, the only outside I will actually see is a petrol pump and will follow all normal careful hygiene procedures.

Interesting your comment , Craftyone - I think that the government really did not want any sort of Lockdown, but then lost their nerve as numbers of deaths increased, so brought it in rather late.

Then they were concerned that people would not obey the rules, so they started ProjectFear - to terrify the population into obeying. And, yes, that worked very well, both in getting compliance AND in flattening the curve and ensuring that the NHS was not overwhelmed.

Obviously, those who invented ProjectFear did not feel they had to obey it - (Cummings), to they could go to visit family hundreds of miles away AND have a pleasant birthday outing with an elderly Mother.

Now, they have the problem of undoing ProjectFear, and getting people out again. But, think they are now putting themselves in the position where (except for their most ardent supporters),. nobody believes anything they say.

I have followed sensible hygiene rules throughout, washing hands mainly - but NOT stayed indoors all the time. Done my own weekly supermarket shop - do not wash those packages, neither have I washed or isolated items arriving at my home ordered on-line. Have throughout met up with my daughter in the local park or on the beach on most days - not touched them, and stayed a good 6 feet apart. She has also popped in to help me out when I have needed it - again washing her hands as soon as she walks into the flat -the guest bathroom is right next to my front door.

Must say, though, glad I was down here this year and not in my house in London, where I would definitely have felt more isolated and vulnerable.

As I said, right at the beginning of this, I am very philosophical about it all - but was not willing just to stop living at all, at my time of life, no idea how many months, years I may have left.

Tomorrow is the BIG day, Shandy - it has finally arrived - you will have a large sum of money in your bank and no further worries about the cost of The Station. Wonderful....

I still watch Rightmove in WsM, looking at flats, my daughter laughingly asked me 'Why?' and I said that as I had been doing it now regularly for nearly five years, it was a habit that was hard to kick. Have not noticed many more new flats on here, but it is always a fairly slow market here. Good to hear that those who are involved in this horrible process (buying/selling) can now start to make progress again.

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