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Help calm me. house buying and selling stress. Part 5

(1001 Posts)
craftyone Tue 28-Apr-20 12:43:38

Links to the first four threads

www.gransnet.com/forums/house_and_home/1274712-Help-calm-me-house-buying-and-selling-stress-Part-4

thread number 5

Shandy57 Fri 03-Jul-20 09:20:38

Morning all, overcast here again today.

I like your address book idea Franbern, ha ha, you'd never know I taught secretarial studies in the 80's, why didn't I think of that! I have to flick through my current book to find the right page.

I'm not sure what to do with today. The second hand bookshop only take 10 books a week, I'm going to have to go about ten times. I think I'll store half of them in the car as I can hardly get to the fridge, they are all in the kitchen. I'm not going to list them on ebay, it's such a faff now our local family run PO close for two hour lunch breaks. They've furloughed the staff.

After my initial organising and tidying I haven't really done anything here, I could sort my bed linen today. I had bought my daughter a 'christmas' bed set and told her on the phone, she's bought herself one too, so I'll keep it for me. I keep continuing to research areas, I had a good look around Worthing last night. My estranged aunt (I know!) lives there, but I wouldn't be able to stay with her. She visited me here in 2001 and contact has been erratic, we don't have any relationship. Unfortunately my Dad ruined that relationship by making overtures towards her when courting my Mum, how awful for her. Apparently he wrote her a letter (she was 16) asking her to go away with him for the weekend, I didn't find out until my Mum died. She married young and moved to Worthing and hardly ever visited my grandma again. He was a rotten apple from the very start, I shouldn't be sad he has stopped contacting me.

Enjoy your day whatever you are doing smile I'll be like a Halloween ghost in the bedroom.

midgey Fri 03-Jul-20 10:34:45

Morning everyone. Shandy have you thought of webuybooks.com or other similar companies? You have to find the ISBN, not sure if your lovely new computer could scan it for you, they make you an offer. You parcel up the books, a company will collect them and you will get a cheque. Company might not want them but a thought!

Shandy57 Fri 03-Jul-20 13:09:10

Hey midgey thanks for that. I've just been on a food shop and spent more than I expected, any money is welcome smile

midgey Fri 03-Jul-20 13:22:51

Try googling for book buyers Shandy.

Franbern Fri 03-Jul-20 18:05:54

Booked an optician appointment now. Gone to local optician for this. Week after next.

I did get annoyed listening to Johnson claiming they closed WSM hospital a few weeks back. The Hospital and local health authority took this decision entirely by themselves.

Do not suppose Johnson even knew where WsM was at that point. Hospital found they had an increase in Covid cases, and closed their doors immediately to anybody new coming in.

Their own subsequent investigations discovered the source of this increase was in their own staff member, and their quick closure prevented it spreading the community.
It is back to normal now -but heard the PM claiming the 'government had taken action to close this hospital' Just another of his downright lies.

Be interesting to see how tomorrow goes, with pubs opening at 6.00 am!!! Not something I have missed - although did occasionally like going for a pub meal - but very occasionally!!!

Shandy57 Fri 03-Jul-20 21:37:32

Thought you'd like a giggle, I've spent about twenty minutes trying to fit the tv aerial adaptor I bought today to the end of the tv aerial lead that comes out of the wall.

Minute twenty one I realised I could unscrew the one that was on there, and replace with the new one I bought for £1.83 at our local hardware shop! I think I left my brain at the house when I sold it, honestly!

I've got tv at last, it's only taken five months!

I'll say 'cheers' as the pubs are open tomorrow - who an earth would go to the pub at 6 am, I feel for the staff who have been asked to come in.

Franbern Sat 04-Jul-20 08:46:29

Wow, Shandy, how have you managed without TV for so long. I will admit that when I moved, I told my daughter in WsM, that once she picked up the keys to the flat, and started letting the removal company bring in the furniture etc., there were three things I wanted to ensure were up and running by that evening - 1. My adjustable bed, 2. My recliner armchair, 3. the TV in my Living Room.

It is my form of entertainment - I have iut joined to a Humax and record programmes that I think I may wish to see, and, except for first thing in the morning - rarely watch real time tv, but these recorded programmes.

I then had to get the aerial extended into my bedroom, which was fine. Did not get an extension into the guest bedroom - but discovered that I could use an internal aerial in there, which gives a reasonably good picture.

I can remember, at my last house, having tv aerial sockets put in every room (except bathroom), Living room, kitchen, three bedrooms and loft room. Wonder if they are used now!!!

I have a quiet weekend in front of me. Nowhere to go, and really, nothing much to do indoors. It has been raining overnight and looks grey outside. Do hope the proper summer weather will return sometime soon. My diary shows that I should have been in London this weekend, Spending today with my daughter and then going to stay in a Marriott hotel overnight to attend an AGM tomorrow!!

Ellianne Sat 04-Jul-20 09:13:10

Just dropping by, the (so far so good) madness is hotting up on DDs move, so have been busy back and forth. Dreading timing in the removals more than anything, the crucial part but the one that causes the grief. Will catch up when things are really underway, don't want to jinx it yet!

loopyloo Sat 04-Jul-20 09:26:09

Yes it's a grey day here in East London. Can't believe it's July but this is the British summer. It's a mirage and it catches me out every year. I am sure that's one reason we had an empire, to hop on a boat and go somewhere warm.

So today I could paint the radiator in the sitting room, work on a dress I am making for DGD or dress up warm and do some gardening. Then I have my tax return to do and LPAs to work on. What fun.

An autumn catalogue came yesterday so I was looking at the bulbs last night. Some really weird parrot ones. Might try them.
The car has been giving trouble but only when DH drives it. Am wondering if he thinks it's stalled because he is so deaf now and cannot hear the engine.

Watched This Beautiful Fantastic and did enjoy it. A bit implausible, though as she managed to have 3 men willing to do things for her. And the actress was such a Keira Knightly look alike. Something else have watched is the Luminaries. Worth watching for the shots of the sail ship around New Zealand. Might ff all the dialogue .

Worthing sounds good. Must really get to the seaside this year even if it's just Southend!

Have a good day everyone.

Whiff Sat 04-Jul-20 09:39:27

Ellianne hope all goes well. Must admit the TV was a priority when I moved. My son in law set it up for me. I listen to classic FM from the moment I wake until lunch time and then put the TV on and usually watch a world drama on all 4. As I can eat and read subtitles unfortunately can't do that and cross stitch.

Another rainy day here again. Dying to get in the garden and tackle the weeds . I have plants in pots that need to be planted out. But until I get rid of the weeds can't do it. So frustrating. Who would have thought I would turn out to be a gardener!

Heard from Dunelm my curtains have been despatched so hopefully get them in a few days . Then I can move into my bedroom and organise the decorator to get the spare room decorated. Also my new mattress have been despatched. Have decided to give the bedside table I put together to give it a couple coats of clear varnish. Now have to order some and paint brushes. Already got sandpaper. Will order my bench from Wayfair in a couple of days. Look forward to putting it together with my trusty electric screwdriver. That's another that's thing that's changed me doing DIY. My husband would be laughing his socks off. Never to old to learn and do new things.

Have a good day everyone whatever you are doing.

Shandy57 Sat 04-Jul-20 10:00:47

Morning all, drizzly and overcast again. We have high winds coming, I thank my lucky stars I've sold the station, it was so exposed. I was always frightened tiles would fly off/ a chimney would come down.

I don't know how I managed without tv Franbern, I used to find it frustrating when I visited my daughter at her Uni accommodation and they only had Iplayer etc. I was at the hardware store yesterday when the customer in front of me asked for the adaptor and I had a light bulb moment smile Enjoy your quiet weekend, sorry your plans had to be cancelled.

Fingers crossed Ellianne, it's such a stressful time, best wishes to your daughter for a smooth move. I can hardly believe I had to move on my own now, those weeks seem like a bad dream but I'm still terribly tired. My 'hayfever' seems to be getting worse, I'm wondering if I've become allergic to my cat.

I looked at the Exmouth community page just now and the locals are horrified, the roads are gridlocked with caravans. I hope not to be stoned when I go in September smile

Nice to see you and read your news loopylou. I sympathise with your husband's hearing, I had a hearing test last year and know I can't hear some sounds although the hearing person said it's 'normal' for my age. I watched the Luminaries too as I thought the book was fantastic, but I can't follow it as it is so changed.

I've done some research on Worthing now and had a look at comments about it on another website for young Mums, very useful.

I didn't get round to sorting the bed linen yesterday, put it off as it makes my arms ache. I do miss having a 'landing' to do the linen folding. Our local charity shop are only taking clothes, shoes and handbags for their first intake, probably next Friday. I know most of the volunteers and they are older like me, it's going to be very heavy work with the large amounts coming in.

Enjoy your weekend smile

Shandy57 Sat 04-Jul-20 10:02:07

ha ha Whiff, black and electric thumbs now! smile

Franbern Sat 04-Jul-20 10:22:47

SHandy, Worthing would be good. Has all you ask, and is well served with roads, etc.

Indeed, as I have said before, think anywhere along that part of the South Coast would suit you admirably. Not sure of prices of properties though -the places to find cheaper property prices is to go EAST of Brighton, going towards Hastings. St Leonards is excellent, has train direct to London, reasonable road links and Hastings very close. Yet, more quiet than most of the places on the south coast. Have a look at that.

Whiff, you do sound so very busy - I must say that I am delighted that I have so little to do. The flat takes little time to keep clean, everything has its place, and even when (as yesterday, daughter and two g.children visited), only takes me about five minutes to clear away after them.

They enjoyed the scones I made yesterday, with butter and strawberry jam. Such quick and easy things to make.

One of my really good decisions here was NOT to bother to have a full-sized oven in the kitchen. Just have a convector micro-wave, and that serves me perfectly, and takes up so much less room. Do use this for baking cakes, bread, pastry, etc. Only thing it is not very good at is grilling - but I have a small electric grill for that purpose, which packs away easily in a cupboard when not in use. Was a big decision for me - but so glad I went with my gut feeling on this.

Franbern Sat 04-Jul-20 10:42:43

Whiff, you do sound so very active and busy. Must say I am very content that this flat is so easy to run and requires little housework. Even after yesterday, when I had my daughter and two g.children here all afternoon, was less than ten minutes work when they had gone to get things back to normal.

I made a batch of scones yesterday morning, which were enjoyed by all with butter and jam. So pleased I took the decision NOT to have a large normal oven in the kitchen here -taking up space. The convector microwave I purchased takes up little space on the worktop and I am able to use it for roasting potatoes, etc and baking bread, cakes and pastry. The only thing it is not good at is grilling - and I have a small george foreman grill, which is quick and easy to use and clean and packs away into a cupboard most of the time. Was a big decision and one that has worked out very well.

Shandy, Worthing is nice, but anywhere on the South Coast would probably suit you. Problem is that most places west of Brighton are quite pricey with regards to property - totally different if you look east of Brighton.

Just out of interest, I looked into Rightmove for bungalows in both Worthing and St. Leonards. (The latter has its own station with direct service to London and good road links). It is also much quieter there in the summer months that some of the other places along that coastline.

Anyway, large differences in price. Three hundred thousand pounds is the top end of prices for bungalows in St. Leonards, (with plenty of choices), but right at the bottom (with very few) in Worthing.

One of my daughters held her wedding in St. Leonards four years back ( marking her and partners twenty years together). It was lovely there on a May Bank Holiday weekend. And, no distance to Hastings. My daughter lives just west of Hove - but chose St. Leonards as prices for everything there, including the large hotel (where we all stayed), on the front was so much more reasonable.

You do need to check property prices before making any of your journeys.

Franbern Sat 04-Jul-20 10:43:26

Sorry for the repeated post. When I looked I thought the first one had not been posted. Senior moment!!!

GrandmaMoira Sat 04-Jul-20 11:04:55

Shandy, I do agree with Franbern about Worthing. I visited last year and really like it there but all of west Sussex is more expensive than east Sussex - Hastings being cheapest. I like Eastbourne and think it much nicer than Hastings but still cheaper than Worthing. The Kent coast towns are cheaper still.

Whiff Sat 04-Jul-20 13:03:58

Couldn't stand the weeds any longer. So went into the garden. It had stopped raining. Got the weeds out of the rockery. And planted the oregano. Moved a bush then it started to rain. But was determined to plant out the 2 Clematis. I had a roll of climbing plastic trellis from Aldi got it months ago. As I had kept my husband's tools thought what would Craftyone do. So cut 2 pieces and made cylinders using plastic ties to hold it together. Dug deep holes put them in after back filling and firming down put the plants in with plenty of fresh compost. It started to rain. My foxgloves arrived but just left them in the pots . Hopefully can plant them tomorrow after more weeding. Do you know my first thought was I wanted to send my son a photo of what I had done. Talk about pathetic . My newest grandson is due this month he may have already been born and don't know if they will let me know. Sorry having a weak moment. Soon snap out of it.

Shandy57 sounds like you are getting plenty of advice. Enjoy having a look on Rightmove.

Franbern scones sound lovely. Might make some this afternoon. At least I can freeze some and ration myself as still trying to lose weight.

craftyone Sat 04-Jul-20 15:21:07

I believe that some of us choose to be busy in a very positive way, it is good for endorphins and helps us to be upbeat. I have been very busy all morning, just had my lunch and it was a cooked lunch! I made a round floor length table cover for a round coffee table in my living room, exactly the same colours and shades as in my rug, looks lovely with a large orchid in a large `peony` bowl on top, cost an arm and a leg from peony but looks very real.

While at it today I made 2 zipped cushion covers from the same fabric and they are also set up in the living room. I cleaned up, vacuumed down and up and re-arranged some furniture. It all began because I could not get to my seldom-used ironing board. I have a steam generator iron, was meant for my husband who did all the ironing and it arrived after he died. That is going to dd in 11 days and I have ordered a very nice iron, much easier to use for sewing jobs. I moved a chest of drawers in the same room and put the ironing board into my sewing room. I have a rug to tie up and get rid of, might as well be minus a rug in the small room, the floor is nice without one. I only brought them because it seemed a waste not to

Shandy57 Sun 05-Jul-20 00:29:20

Evening all, I'm a bit late smile Very busy day sorting out lots of bed linen, won't be ironing it craftyone! I've worked on having two sets for each bed, and one spare. I had so much with the self catering business - I used to buy 800 thread count, absolutely horrible to iron as it was so thick.

Have had a strange incident - for Father's Day I sent my kids a parcel each. I was convinced I'd put some food money into my daughter's account just after posting the parcel, but found out today she hadn't received it. I've checked all of my bank accounts, and can't see the payment anywhere. I remember doing it - I think. Perhaps I didn't put in my password and it got cancelled. Strange. Although saying that, I know I am very preoccupied at the moment.

Just wanted to tell you I've got the bad luck of a wasps nest under the roof over the bathroom. I was hoping they were honey bees but used the binoculars, definitely wasps. I've kept on top of the nests in the garage by spraying it regularly, they've obviously moved out of there because of it. I do wish something nice would happen for a change smile

Whiff Sun 05-Jul-20 06:58:47

Shandy57 if you want something nice to happen sometimes we have to do it for yourself. Sounds harsh I know. But it's true. No one's life is easy and as some on here know only to well it can be down right cruel. Never mind sorting linen etc. You need to find a new home or you will miss the boat. Have you looked for properties? Or are you putting it off. It's not easy doing things in your own but if you don't no one else will. The longer you faff about the less chance you have of getting what you want. You are in a good position being a cash buyer with the money already. Have you set yourself a budget. What you will pay if it only needs decorating and what you will if it needs work ie new bathroom, kitchen , windows etc. I looked at the house prices for 2 bed houses and bungalows on Rightmove at the places others had recommended for you. Can you afford those areas? Taking in consideration moving costs , solicitors, council tax , insurance etc. You need to sit down with a pen and paper a write everything down. Don't put it off any longer do it today. Don't think it was easy for me or anyone else on here moving. It's not . It was more stressful than my husband dying. But you have done the hard part you have sold your house.

Why give your children money on father's Day! Your children are adults and as such support themselves. You need to think of you and only you until you are settled in your new home. Over the time you have been posting on this thread you have changed growing in confidence and making hard decisions. What has happened to make you doubt yourself now? Come on I know you can do it. Give yourself a shock and add up how much money you have wasted by not moving yet. You should have decided where you wanted to live before you sold your house.

This may seem cruel but I'm not. I hope you have a close friend who could say all this to you but don't know if you have. I have had to have this sort of talk with a friend of mine. Her builder is starting work on her extension tomorrow and her kitchen fitter has given her 10th August he can fit the kitchen. She still hasn't decided on free standing or integrated appliances told her she needs to decide today. Hopefully she has decided when I speak to her tonight. As her fitter will need to order the units to suit.

Shandy57 you are stronger than you think . Look at all you have already gone through since your husband died. You sold your house, got rid of things ,packed and moved out on your own. You have a whole new life waiting for you. New challenges, new adventures and new friends. Go for it now you won't regret it.

Franbern Sun 05-Jul-20 09:02:17

Shandy, just to say how much I endorse what Whiff has written. You do seem to be finding 'things to do'. making those as excuses for not doing what you need to do - FIND YOUR NEW HOME.

It is all very well, thinking you have a lot of money now - and enjoying giving it away - flowers for a total stranger, pressies for your very adult children for fathers day!!! New one on me!!!

You have been told by all of us who have moved how much we have needed to spend during that first year in our new homes, twenty to thirty grand plus on alterations, decorations, new furniture, window coverings, etc. etc. Then, of course, there is the actual costs of moving, probably need to allow another five grand plus. for all related costs. A removal firm taking all your home a long way will need a two day job, and that is expensive. I received quotes for between two and half and four grand for that. You will need to pay stamp duty on your new purchase, and, of course, Solicitors fees.

Once you have allowed for these, what is left is what you can afford to pay for your new purchase (unless you also have the idea of keeping some as savings), Also, every months rental payment is more money away from your new home.
So - from your sale price of The Station - does not really give you a very large amount. Think you need to be very careful with your money until you are well settled into your new home and know how the costs are working out.

I had a very lazy day yesterday, unlike others on here, could not find anything really to do - it was so grey, and damp that I did not bother to go out - and, of course, paid for it, as I just could not get to sleep last night!!! Will force myself to go out today, wearing a fleece if necessary. Bright sunshine at the moment, but very windy.

loopyloo Sun 05-Jul-20 10:29:00

Totally agree with Whiff and Franbern. The money is going to evaporate very quickly. Find somewhere and move.
Have a good day.

loopyloo Sun 05-Jul-20 10:36:05

I see you are going to Exeter in September. I thought it was in the next couple of weeks. If it were me I would be annoyed at paying all that rent to the landlord.
But you have to do things your way, Really like the idea of the south coast. Exeter is a bit remote.
Wishing you all the best whatever you decide.

Shandy57 Sun 05-Jul-20 11:18:53

Morning all, sunny but very breezy here!

Sorry about yesterday, was having a bit of a pity party. I will make my own 'happy', you are right. Just constant toothache, too many punctures and now a wasps nest! I'm sure I'm going to lose this tooth now, dentist had to rebuild it after ripping my filling off years ago with one of those delicious Slimming World rocky road bars!

I am having difficulty looking because I have a small budget to spend in such popular and expensive areas. I've started looking at ground floor flats too now, but so many have communal gardens, so difficult when you have a puss cat.

I promise you I am constantly looking on line at places and properties, and hope to be able to book my train to Exmouth on Monday. They are only releasing the tickets weekly at the moment.

Ellianne would you mind if I ask why you left Exmouth?

I wish I had a friend up here Whiff, I don't. My one friend is fully involved with child care now, he was very poorly recently, just diagnosed with coeliac. I do talk to my two friends in London regularly, they are always encouraging.

I did a search for a 2 bed bungalow and house in every area I had liked the look of yesterday, up to £300K to see all the choices. I got £268K after the auction costs and have the money in savings to pay the solicitor, he's not sent his bill yet, it was £1300.

I hope to buy somewhere that needs decoration only, for up to £240 ish, the £28k will go toward moving costs, stamp duty etc, hopefully a small buffer left for emergencies.

I've had my first month's interest on the house purchase monies, just peanuts, I will be moving it to NS&I soon, thanks for recommending that craftyone I set up an account with £1 after you'd mentioned it. I have always been hopeless with money, am always too generous, I will tighten my belt now smile

Bungalow choice wise there was a big difference in availability. Eastbourne had 35, Margate 11, Broadstairs 21, Sidmouth 1, Exmouth 18, Wareham 2, Swanage 1.

I think I'm priced out of Swanage as far as bungalows go, they have many, many 'park homes'.

I do really like the facilities in Exmouth, they have a diving school - did I tell you my daughter learnt to dive in Cambodia and 'litter picked' the coral reef? Loads and loads of plastic stuck on the coral, they had to go down every day and remove it.

Off to get dressed and take my poor dog out, he's been waiting patiently. Need to buy that bed laptop tray Franbern, I think this is burning a hole in my dressing gown smile

Shandy57 Sun 05-Jul-20 13:33:32

Just had a stroke of luck, the nice taxi man (there are only two here I use) was in the village this morning. I asked him if he'd consider driving me to Devon with my cat and dog, and he said yes. One problem out of the way, I couldn't imagine trying to get them down there on the train, even though my son said he'd accompany me.

Franbern, can I please ask, were your maintenance and service charges very clear when you bought your flat? I am nervous about going leasehold. I go onto moneysavingexpert 'House buying, selling and renting' forum and someone recently had a huge bill from a company who have a 'charge' on the land. If I do buy leasehold I'd have to go through all the paperwork very carefully.

I've just written to the rental agency about the dishwasher not working, the broken curtain rail, and the wasps nest. I must stop being nervous about 'bothering' the landlord.

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