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Help calm me. House buying and selling stress. Part 6

(1001 Posts)
craftyone Tue 07-Jul-20 13:32:14

Links to the first five threads

www.gransnet.com/forums/house_and_home/1277819-Help-calm-me-house-buying-and-selling-stress-Part-5?pg=40

thread number 6

Whiff Mon 20-Jul-20 09:34:13

Funny the houses which have at first. Always what you can afford. How innocent in the house buying process we where in those days ,how young. Bit more savy with the next one as most needed bigger for expanding family and being a bit better off. And our final move at lot of us on our own or with long term relationships ( don't just mean married couples) is what we had always wanted. Funny how long it takes us to get there. Our haven for future years.
As I have said I have never felt so at peace. Even with this going on with my son. Still feel that peace. No amount of money could buy that.

Each of us have made our new places as we have always wanted our home to be. I know some are still in the process and we need Shandy57 and everyone else house hunting to find theirs.

It's lovely to share what we are up to. I love everyone's stories of past and present. It's what makes us.

My washing is pegged out. Just finishing a cuppa before sorting out where I want to put everything now I have use of all my rooms. Would really like to weed but must get the sorting done.

Have a good day everyone.

Franbern Mon 20-Jul-20 09:52:42

Back home from Sainsbury - shopping all put away and a loaf of bread starting its first proofing. Relaxing day ahead, although I think I should get down to some window cleaning. Glorious, warm sunshine - but it shows up the windows.

Yes, you are correct Whiff, takes us quite a long time, and lots of hard-earned experience to get to what makes us really happy. Hubbie and I were first people in both our families to own (or with mortgate) our own home - so had no-one to advise or guide us with that first purchase.

Have a good day everyone.

Ellianne Mon 20-Jul-20 09:58:47

"Gazumping" now that's a word I've not heard for ages! We have only done it once when someone came and gazumped our full asking price offer, so feeling miffed we gazumped them and they cleared off! Having bought and sold over 12 times you would think I'd find the process easier, but I am still feeling very unsettled this week waiting for our daughter to exchange.
Yes, there is a big property boom on the way, it's what the Chsncellir wanted and it is working. Those in rented really need to go for it now.

Shandy57 Mon 20-Jul-20 10:07:01

I'm back with my tooth intact - it's a back molar behind a crown. Disgustingly I still had 'debris' trapped because I only use satin floss, I've never been brave enough to use the tiny brushes in this area, dentist showed me how to do it. Tooth is OK and hopefully I won't have pain and be gulping down paracetamol when I go away. When I visited my daughter in Canada I cracked a tooth and was in agony, I wish I'd had my hot water bottle there!

Fingers crossed for your daughter Ellianne, won't it be lovely to be together.

Ellianne Mon 20-Jul-20 10:12:01

Franbern I can picture all your houses round my old West Essex/E4 stomping ground! All your homes must have thrilled you at the time, but of course things change over the years as the family evolves and we have to adapt to what suits us and what we can afford at the time. So lovely to hear everyone now feels happy, safe and at peace. "Haven" is the right word Whiff.
I was an only child and inherited a large London house from my mum when I got married. People used to say I was lucky and had a silver spoon in my mouth, but I was so unlucky in that she died and never saw our children. As you say Whiff sometimes money doesn't buy happiness and I would have lived in a garden shed to have had a few more years with her.

Shandy57 Mon 20-Jul-20 11:22:06

How very sad Ellianne, I still miss my Mum 20 years later sad At least you were able to deal with your Mum's things - my Mum lived with my brother and when she died my SIL cleared out her rooms before I could get over there, had given much away, and burnt her diaries. I've never got over it.

Interesting you talking about past houses, as I'm having to look at the same small 2 bed houses which my husband and I started our married life in. I've gone back to the beginning.

Whiff Mon 20-Jul-20 11:24:31

I would live in a shed if it meant 20+ years with my husband Ellianne. Unfortunately life throws spanners in the works. We do the best we can. Day by Day. Hope your daughter has exchange date soon.

craftyone Mon 20-Jul-20 11:45:35

Whiff

I would live in a shed if it meant 20+ years with my husband Ellianne. Unfortunately life throws spanners in the works. We do the best we can. Day by Day. Hope your daughter has exchange date soon.

yes. Pick ourselves up, dust ourselves down and carry on living because that is what we know they would want us to do.

Its been whizzy busy here, how the garden is the tail that wags the dog, still I do prefer to be busy than bored. Courgette and tarragon soup made, garden salad eaten for break, home grown veg medley for lunch with halloumi. Leeks ordered from ebay ,I have some already growing from seed but I want more, very easy peasy. Make hole, trim roots, drop into hole and water into hole without a spray end. Stand back and wait for lovely leeks in winter

I am binge watching downton, my after-work daily treat, later

Whiff Mon 20-Jul-20 12:51:09

Like you Craftyone I've had a whizzy morning. Storing places to put everything. But am sagging now. So time to stop. Piles of books ready to be sorted tomorrow.

My new shower room has 2, new items a potty chair and padded child toilet seat. My one grandson loves the chair ,the seat only arrived today. Hopefully one day my other grandsons will get to use them.

Anyway nearly lunch and next installment of The Team on all 4. Then cross stitching watching something else. As I can't stitch and read subtitles different glasses.

Have a good afternoon.

Franbern Mon 20-Jul-20 13:14:28

My Mum died in 1984, aged 80 yrs. Not bad considering that when she was born, my g.parents were told they were unlikely to see her grow to adulthood due to a problem with her heart. Yes, she did actually die from heart failure. Her birthday was a few day ago, I still say Happy Birthday to her.

She did see all her g.children born, but I would have loved for her to have been able to attend some of their graduations. This is something I am hoping to be able to do - first of these for my g.children should be in four years.

Have made a nice Cholla Loaf, this afternoon to make an apple cake AND to clean some windows.

I have to admit that I am now totally settled in to the way things are at present. Do like that I can get out to visit people and be visited, and go to shops, and go on outings etc. Only thing different for me now is not being able to attend the meetings of U3A, etc. but do have lots of those via Zoom.

craftyone Mon 20-Jul-20 13:50:30

Franbern smile I like that

I am definitely keeping on top of things, after all winter is the hunkering down time for me, like a flower, alive but hibernating. The garden is producing a lot but I am tidying up as I go, cutting back, composting, clearing beds and spaces. I am keeping an eye on my clothing, have lots of hobby stuff and food. The worst time for me to winter prep is when I have to. I have plenty of stove fuel and have arranged the various servicing and sweeps. Freezer is filling up too

Books, jigsaws, crafting, I have to save these for winter, am too busy right now but also something to look forward to, this coming winter might be psychologically difficult for many of us

I took 2 loads to the tip yesterday, including some electricals that I had not used in over a year. A big freestanding towel rail, some things that I wish I had not bought like felt planters on stands, no wonder they were in a sale, were not worth the effort. Bone dry below in spite of watering twice a day

Maybe my wicker storage baskets next, the ones that fit in a drawer. I am waiting for wham to arrive and will decide then. I tightened all the drawer handles yesterday, several had worked loose, chests of drawers upstairs

Anyone else only got themselves to talk to today?

loopyloo Mon 20-Jul-20 16:28:37

Well I have had my D H to talk to but need to say everything twice. But had a great outing as DGD has caught the riding bug and we bought her a hard hat and for DGS we bought a mouse mat with lights round the edge.
Wonderful to be out in the car with children and dog, going into shops using the hand gel and keeping our distance.
Now collapsed in a chair with a coffee.
I have moved about every ten years. Quite odd. Perhaps our experiences when young form patterns. Generally we move because of family reasons. Think I get bored after a while and am happy to move on.
Next move will be into a residential home.

Franbern Mon 20-Jul-20 16:34:31

SHandy, glad the dentist sorted you and your tooth out. I must admit that teeth cleaning is a good five minutes for me morning and night. Electric toothbrush held for at least 10 seconds on each tooth, both front and back, then those interdental brushes. Three years ago, a hygenist charged me a hundred pounds (two visits), and left me with such a painful mouth for nearly two weeks, Determined not to go again unless I could really help it. So started my very long and careful dental routine -which seems to have worked. ) My last check up (just before lockdown) and all well (not too bad for a 79 yr old having had five babies.

As you all know I have not been, at any time, very paranoid about this virus - but have always worn a face mask when in Sainsbury (out of respect for other people. When I was in there this morning, I would have said that about 90% shoppers were wearing them. This afternoon, I popped down to the local Home Bargains store. Only been to one previously, and that was about two years back but this one is very near to me, and everyone says how good their prices are for cleaning things.

As I went in, popped on my mask. As I went round I was astonished that, with just four days before this becomes a legal requirement, I was the ONLY shopper in there so doing. So strange that two stores, not all that far from each other, are so different. Glad I went, and yes, they are good for cleaning materials, etc.

Glad to be back home now though, think I have overdone it today, what with up early for Sainsbury, Made large Cholla and apple cake, then out again to this other store. Car now locked back in garage, just sank in chair when I first got indoors. Apart from a zoom meeting tonight have nothing further to do. I feel exhausted.

I do like to have a jigsaw (1000) pieces on the go all the time. Wonderful way of wasting (spending) any waiting times, as soon as charity shops open again, will be getting myself some more. At present my daughter and I are sharing and swopping these between us.

Whiff Tue 21-Jul-20 06:33:49

Franbern you had a whizzy day yesterday as well. When I went to visit my friend from U3A on Thursday to see her new house I keep my mask on after I got off the bus and only took it off in her house. Back on when I left to go shopping. A lot of people of all ages had masks on some very colourful. Mine are the one use sort. When the taxi arrived the drive asked me if I wanted him to put his mask on I said no as I had mine on. Since being here found the taxi drivers very friendly and I have never asked them but they always carry my bags to my front door. My fare is usually £2.70 but always say put £3 on the machine you have to tap. I know it's not a lot and say so but they always thank me. Every little bit counts. In the Midlands the cheapest fare was £5 at least here you pay for how long your journey is . Drivers are shocked when I tell them that.

Better get up. Soup to make and then books to sort. Try to get hold of Emmaus again as I have several things for them. Hopefully if it's nice tomorrow I can get out in the garden.
Enjoy your day everyone.

craftyone Tue 21-Jul-20 06:49:49

my sister NW says that many wear masks up there. Hardly anyone wears a mask here, me included but I will keep one in my pocket for the supermarket, I am only going every 2 weeks as it is, it will be less frequent

I might do some fridge cleaning today, best to keep on top of things, a bit at a time. Yesterday I did the ensuite plughole with thin brushes and poured boiling water with bleach down. Just a little job every day and nothing really builds up. I`ll sort my food and cleaning stores when the weather is cooler, I have no intention of letting my stash drop, winter might be problematic again

Not really gardening today, I did the hoeing yesterday, a very quick job tbh, I zap the weeds when I see them. I will be cycling instead. Everyone, have a nice day

Spice101 Tue 21-Jul-20 08:26:31

Well one never knows what each day will bring.

Just before lunch I had a call from my Mum's aged care home to say she was in cardiac arrest. We are about 25 minutes away but by the time we got there she had passed away. 98 years old, she passed away quietly and peacefully. She was an amazing lady who had seen so much pain and hardship in her life but was never one to dwell on the negative but to find the positives. The last four years had not been easy for her as she went from being a fiercely independent woman to relying on her carers for many of the basic things we take for granted in day to day life - toileting, showering, getting in and out of bed etc, . She was not happy about this but she never complained, determined to make the most of a bad situation. Fortunately she was cared for very well and very much a favourite among the staff and she could get around in her motorised chair which meant she did still have some independence.

She was intensely proud of and interested in the lives of her 5 children, 9 grandchildren and 6 great grandchildren.

At least this b#^ virus didn't get her. That would have been an insult.

craftyone Tue 21-Jul-20 09:06:58

That is a beautiful post spice. Your precious mum was one of those positive people that adds good to earth energy and to its people and lifeforce. A rare breed today. May she rest in peace and hugs to you

Today has carried me along, as usual, I started while wearing my summer dressing gown, as usual. It only started with me moving a large uplifting recliner further into the room and suddenly that made sense and made a better division in my lounge. Then I started bottoming with the vac and decided to do a chair position swap, the recliner is now further away from the door and near the french doors, much better and its wiring is completely out of sight

Now I am sitting in my zero gravity chair in its upright position, needing a large footstool/pouffe for my feet due to short legs, I have a puffe here, large, pale grey knitted cotton, round. I admit that I am very comfy and my back is better supported, this is the perfect knitting chair in this position and if I need to rest my bones, then I will go back into zero gravity (like lafuma). 15 onths on and I only thought of this today!!

I pushed my big sofa a bit, I needed somwhere for my 3 nice stacking coffee tables, now up past the back of the sofa, in sight and looking fine. I can get past to the window behind

What I am saying is that a tweak here and a tweak there, it changes the ambience/energy/dynamics/feng shui in a room

So now I am having a deserved coffee and the vac and a duster are on the floor in front of me. I own up that I have not moved most of this furniture the whole time I have been here. Box of photos is going upsatirs into a cupboard to replace the faux flowers I didn`t like and 4 storage boxes in light grey, with lids, ordered from amazon to match the 2 I already have. They will all be on the floor at bottom of my shelving unit

Franbern Tue 21-Jul-20 09:10:40

Spice, sorry to hear your sad news. But, 98 is a wonderful age, and she did live to see so many of her descendants, wonderful in itself. I totally understand what you say about her final four years. Glad that she was in a good home and well cared for in these final years.

It is always sad when anyone dies, but when it someone of that age, cannot use the word tragic and it sounds as if she had a peaceful death. What more can any of us ask for.

Hope you have lots of family support during the next few weeks.

craftyone Tue 21-Jul-20 09:13:22

I actually started by wondering how I could refine storage in my utility, I have a grey hoomataook shelf stuck on the tiles in there, right at the top, the tiles are only 16" high. I keep my first aid box on there and a couple of other things. I have ordered 2 more identical shelves, they will be good for some storage, bottles etc 3 in a row, will look nice

Franbern Tue 21-Jul-20 09:15:52

I was totally exhausted yesterday evening. Really must learn to pace myself a little better these days.

Fortunately, the zoom meeting I needed to attend, which was very interesting, was a sort of lecture, and I was able to attend that in my nightie with both my video and microphone turned off. Really do like zoom for this sort of thing, love being able to attend from my own armchair.

Another zoom lecture this morning to attend (U3 Social History group(. Pity that it clashes with the U3A weekly coffee Zoom coffee morning. Taking it very easy today, daughter will be here later this afternoon for chat and tea.

I left a message on a local window cleaners answerphone yesterday, but they have not come back to me. Plenty of other listed though.

Shandy57 Tue 21-Jul-20 09:18:18

Morning all, sunny here again.

Spice101 I am so sorry to read your Mum has passed, my deepest sympathies to you and your family.

I'm finally ready for my first trip to Broadstairs in August. Trains, taxis, accommodation, kennels and cat sitter booked. Now to decide what to actually look for when I'm down there!

Enjoy your day whatever you are doing smile

maytime2 Tue 21-Jul-20 09:25:34

Sorry to hear your sad news Spice. Some of my family members lived into their nineties and when they died, the fact that they passed away peacefully, without pain, was a comfort.

midgey Tue 21-Jul-20 09:35:24

Sorry to hear your news Spice. flowers

Ellianne Tue 21-Jul-20 10:23:31

Sorry to hear about your mother Spice.

Whiff Tue 21-Jul-20 10:48:28

My sympathies are with you and your family Spic101. Your mom lived to see a lot of life. And had family and friends who loved and cared for her. Huds to you and all your loved ones.

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