Jeep bullying

I understand completely, Sloegin

That last straw can be tiny but when it breaks it breaks

She was being totally unreasonable. No doubt she's forgotten all about it by now.

We cope as best we can with what life throws at us but a small thing can just push us over the edge.

I ended up bawling my eyes out in a supermarket, shortly after my mother had died.

I'd been holding it together quite well. Both parents with dementia. Mum had died and we were trying to sort out all the stuff that entails.

I was queuing up with a few items. Long queue. A cashier opened up another till and beckoned me over and this sprightly old man, (older than me!), ran towards it, cackling as he went. He then turned and winked at me.

And I burst into tears!

All terribly dramatic and ridiculous but it was my last straw. And even now I can think of it and find myself getting upset about it.

All the best to you and I hope your husband is feeling better soon,

Sloegin sounds like a typical Chelsea tractor driver. Could she not have used the passenger door and climbed across to the driver's side? I bet she'd have suggested that if it was you that couldn't get into your car.

I had a man complain to me because the door of my elderly car had touched his Landrover. I told him that I thought the whole point of a Landrover was that it could withstand things like that. He wasn't best pleased.

I had 10 years of my husband being ill and it really takes very little going wrong to tip you over the edge. I hope your husband is improving.

I was taking my mum to and from appointments for a number of years and it did stress me out. She was suffering with dementia it was a very difficult time. The hospital visits were the worst I don't like multi car parks so it was a nightmare. I would be trying to get parked legally then struggling to get mum in a wheelchair.
I burst out crying on many occasion because of people's lack of patience in car parks.
This woman in the Jeep sounds arrogant with a big ego to match it. Obviously feeling superior talking down to you. You didn't defend yourself because you are worried and preoccupied. She was being unreasonable that is rather obvious to me.
You was upset because you didn't stand up to her. It was probably for the best seeing as you are feeling emotional.
If a similar situation happens again you may be in a better frame of mind to deal with it.
I suggest anytime you feel support is needed this is a good place to ask. For now be kind to yourself a little treat that you like maybe and I hope your DH health improves. ??

Actually I think you handled it really well. You could have defended yourself or pointed out it was her big car causing the problem but that would have just escalated it.

Saying “Life is very difficult for all of us” is absolutely true and may have caused her pause for thought, whereas another comment would have made her defensive and angry.

And just maybe she also had something bad going on in her life. An appointment that was worrying her. That made her react to you in a way she wouldn’t normally.

You didn’t do anything wrong, start to finish, so give yourself due credit and then let it go?

Thank you all so far for the empathy and sympathy. It's nice to know that I'm not just being super sensitive and it would have annoyed others too. It annoyed me on so many levels but particularly as, at her age, I'd never have accosted an older person like that. I'm not ancient but very obviously old enough to be her mother, if not her granny! As it happened I saw her turn up in the direction of the local secondary school so have a sneaky feeling feeling she may well have been a teacher who slipped out between classes. Could be wrong of course. Thank you again for all supportive messages.

Parking is really tight at our local surgery. I had to go in and ask a man to move his car. He got huffy and said I could have climbed in.

Yes I could have, problem was he had driven in after me and his wing mirrors overlapped mine so if I'd climbed in from passenger side and reversed out I'd have taken his mirror off. He wouldn't listen to me and I suppose he thinks I was unreasonable. Perhaps I should have just taken his mirror off.

You did handle it well and I understand how something small can set off a flood. Car parks weren't really designed with those big cars in mind but there are so many of them these days.

If those that had large cars had half a brain they would park in a quiet area of the car park, but of course that would mean they had to walk further - tough. Or maybe they should shop at Waitrose where the spaces are larger, really.

I have a large car for several reasons, and don’t shop in Waitrose. You try driving in the Highlands winter in a small car. I do park in quiet spots but what about those who can’t walk very far. Think your posting was a little thoughtless

Oh dear, I didn't want to start a spat about big cars! ( last two posts) . Thank you again for supportive comments. I'm recovering but will never again park beside a big car which takes up the entire space!

Tizliz

I have a large car for several reasons, and don’t shop in Waitrose. You try driving in the Highlands winter in a small car. I do park in quiet spots but what about those who can’t walk very far. Think your posting was a little thoughtless

If you have difficulty, park in a disabled bay, that’s what they are for, nobody is going to pull you up in a supermarket car park if you really have difficulties.

That happened to me. I parked well within the white lines. When I came back to my car there was a two door car parked behind mine. The man in it accused me of bad parking because he had to climb through his window to get in his car as his door would not open.
I was so shocked I said very little but felt very upset for days.
I thought of lots of things I should have said afterwards.

2 door cars, sports cars in particular have longer doors and can be very difficult, thankfully they’re not as popular these days.

If you had parked between the white lines you parked considerately imo, the size of her car sounded as if it was the problem in this instance, maybe she should have looked for a supermarket with wider bays, they do exist.

I have had the odd occasion where someone has parked so close to my car, I couldn't open the driver door wide enough to get in, but those cars had been over the white line, admittedly it's very difficult to access the driver seat via the other side.

You weren't unreasonable Sloegin I think that would be the general consensus of opinion as to how you described the situation. Some people are just arses sorry for your distress hope you feel better.

We have a Waitrose in Twickenham quite near the rugby ground with really narrow spaces, one day I parked there in my elderly narrow car. A man who had got out of his wide car before I parked said " how am I going to get back into my car?" I asked him if he was going to the rugby and when he said yes I said that I would be long gone, but that someone else would probably be parked there and that he might still have the problem! Cars are much wider than they used to be, and lots of car park spaces are still very small.

Was it a real Jeep, or just one of those pseudo things? . The answer to that would have decided your actions if that had been my DH.

BBbevan

Was it a real Jeep, or just one of those pseudo things? . The answer to that would have decided your actions if that had been my DH.

It was a big, shiny white thing. I'm not very good with breeds of cars but it was certainly large and she referred to it as, 'my jeep'. Intrigued to know how it would have decided your DH's actions?

Unfortunately modern parents no longer teach their children to show a respectful attitude towards older people who were contributing to the community before they were born. That means that older people have to learn to lash back, which is sometimes alien to the way in which we were brought up.

I was once reversing my car into a space at the doctor's surgery. To straighten it up I drove forward and the gear box packed up! I was now a few inches away from the car in front. At that point the owner of said car came out - "I can't get my car out" he said. "I'm awfully sorry" I said "But my car's broken down and I can't move it" "But you must move, I can't get my car out" "I can't move it!" Imagine this repeated several times before I was able to get some help from the surgery waiting room and push it back into it's space.

Don't take it to heart. You parked between the lines; parking spots are so narrow these days. If she had parked properly she wouldn't have had an issue.

Something similar happened to me a while back but I was the one who couldn’t get back into my car as someone had parked so close.
I am slim and can usually squeeze into a small space but on this occasion it was impossible.
I went back into the shop having made a note of the registration and they put out a call for the owner.

The problem is, as someone else said, that cars are getting bigger but parking spaces are the same size as years ago.

Generally in supermarket car parks, I park well away from the entrance where it’s quieter with fewer cars, so what happened on that day was a rare occurrence.

I would have just told her where to go!

Hetty58

I would have just told her where to go!

Likewise!!

Sloegin my DH loves Jeeps . He can spot them a mile away. We have also always had Jeeps as our car. Proper Jeeps though .He would not have minded moving one little bit for a Jeep, but like you would have been incensed by the behaviour of that woman. Men are funny aren't they