Wills - leaving to children or grandchildren?

Our only child will get the lot and we trust her to use it in the way she needs to at the time, being divorced and having two young children. A solicitor once told us you can't control everyone from the grave so don't try to make it too complex with too many conditions. Unless you are a multimillionaire I guess.

We have both been married before, and have children from those marriages!

We are in a real quandary. We had very little when we met no previous houses etc so all we have now is from our life n marriage together. (I did have savings for our house deposit). We both had professional jobs so all our assets are jointly and equally earned.

Previous children:-
My husbands two children from his first marriage have no (nor will they have) children, my son (brought up by us) has two GC and is the most wealthy of all of the children.
Our two children have two GC each (nearly!).

Currently the will is left in shares, so DH half shared between his 4 and my half shared between my 3, so 'our' two children get a larger share as they inherit from both!

They all get on well.

BUT this will was before the six grandchildren, I feel that I want the lions part of our assets to go to the children who have our grandchildren, with the ones with no children having a much smaller share. My DH agrees. But we do not know what is an appropriate 'smaller share'. We have yet to change our wills but know we need too, and need to explain it to them all.

They know my jewellery will be our girls, with identified pieces left to my sons girls. All my previous jewellery from my first marriage was stolen in two burglaries!

I must add when my first husband died (far too young) fairly recently, my son -his only child was left a token amount and some personal effects, on the basis that his paternal GFather, was still alive so he will inherit from him! He was devastated, his fathers new wife, (only 4 months before his death) was left the estate, they had never lived together, and only knew one another for 4 years, the last in a long succession of marriages and relationships! My son had just his first baby (5 months old) who was left nothing. He didn't want a lot for her just something to acknowledge her. He said he didn't need the money it was the lack of acknowledgement that hurt, not only of him but of his fathers (at that time) only grandaughter. So if my son or his daughter were left something reasonable, 10-25%, rather than the approximate 1%, he would have been fine.

There was no fall out or argument, they were not close but not estranged, he was his fathers executor, and the best man at his fathers wedding. So this shows there must be no shocks in a will.

Any thoughts would be welcome!

Wow LynC that sounds very complicated and not one easily remedied I guess. We have 4 children 3 of them having 2 children each and one unmarried with none. We have left everything equally between the 4 DC and for them to give what they see fit to our DGC. We thought this the fairest way. My jewellery is stated in the will that it is to be left to our only DD who will divide it out between the herself and the DGC equally. Our DS's are aware and happy with the decision. DH and I don't plan to leave much in the bank as we plan to keep travelling for as long as we can, but hopefully, God willing, they will each have a share in the house unless the government step in and take the lot

Well, unless we win the lottery the Government won't be taking any of ours.
We are well under the limit!

Anything left after we've finished spending it will be split 50/50. One split will then be split between the kids, the other between the GC's.

I have left 80% to be divided equally between my 3 children and the rest to 8 grandchildren. As my son did my will and my two daughters were consulted , I presume everyone is happy (that's if we haven't spent it all !!!)

When my mother died I was in the process of going through divorce. It was agreed that my inheritance would not be taken into account and in the end we agreed a settlement without going to court. I'm not sure what would have happened if it had gone to court but my mother would have been horrified if my ex had benefitted from her will in any way as we separated long before she died and I was only still married to him as he'd made getting a divorce difficult. I'm currently leaving an equal split between my children but both are still single and I have no grandchildren. I may have to review things if that changes.

When my mother died I was in the process of going through divorce. It was agreed that my inheritance would not be taken into account and in the end we agreed a settlement without going to court. I'm not sure what would have happened if it had gone to court but my mother would have been horrified if my ex had benefitted from her will in any way as we separated long before she died and I was only still married to him as he'd made getting a divorce difficult. I'm currently leaving an equal split between my children but both are still single and I have no grandchildren. I may have to review things if that changes.

When my mother died I was in the process of going through divorce. It was agreed that my inheritance would not be taken into account and in the end we agreed a settlement without going to court. I'm not sure what would have happened if it had gone to court but my mother would have been horrified if my ex had benefitted from her will in any way as we separated long before she died and I was only still married to him as he'd made getting a divorce difficult. I'm currently leaving an equal split between my children but both are still single and I have no grandchildren. I may have to review things if that changes.

When my mother died I was in the process of going through divorce. It was agreed that my inheritance would not be taken into account and in the end we agreed a settlement without going to court. I'm not sure what would have happened if it had gone to court but my mother would have been horrified if my ex had benefitted from her will in any way as we separated long before she died and I was only still married to him as he'd made getting a divorce difficult. I'm currently leaving an equal split between my children but both are still single and I have no grandchildren. I may have to review things if that changes.

When my mother died I was in the process of going through divorce. It was agreed that my inheritance would not be taken into account and in the end we agreed a settlement without going to court. I'm not sure what would have happened if it had gone to court but my mother would have been horrified if my ex had benefitted from her will in any way as we separated long before she died and I was only still married to him as he'd made getting a divorce difficult. I'm currently leaving an equal split between my children but both are still single and I have no grandchildren. I may have to review things if that changes.

When my mother died I was in the process of going through divorce. It was agreed that my inheritance would not be taken into account and in the end we agreed a settlement without going to court. I'm not sure what would have happened if it had gone to court but my mother would have been horrified if my ex had benefitted from her will in any way as we separated long before she died and I was only still married to him as he'd made getting a divorce difficult. I'm currently leaving an equal split between my children but both are still single and I have no grandchildren. I may have to review things if that changes.

When my mother died I was in the process of going through divorce. It was agreed that my inheritance would not be taken into account and in the end we agreed a settlement without going to court. I'm not sure what would have happened if it had gone to court but my mother would have been horrified if my ex had benefitted from her will in any way as we separated long before she died and I was only still married to him as he'd made getting a divorce difficult. I'm currently leaving an equal split between my children but both are still single and I have no grandchildren. I may have to review things if that changes.

Oops - not sure how I managed to post that 7 times!

My 3 children will each inherit a third of my estate whether they have children or not - at the moment anyway. My mother is leaving each of her grandchildren £1000 (all adult) except for 2 of them who will share one third of her estate as the children of my late brother - in other words they get what he would have got - and my second brother and I will have the other two thirds.

Anything we /I/ DH leave will be divided between our 3 DDs. If any DD should pre decease us then her share would go to any children she might have and the other 2 DDs would manage that money until GC reach 25. The share of any DD without children would be divided between the other DDs.

We have three children and at the moment we have left everything equally between them. We may change this to take account of grandchildren in a few years time.

We do not feel we should differentiate between our 3 children and each will get 1/3 of our estate. It is up to them to provide for their children. Spouses complicate things especially if marriages are shaky. For this reason we have made ''Bloodline Wills'' which help to ensure that inheritance goes eventually to the grandchildren [provided that our children are sensible''.Our children's inheritance is safeguarded against bankruptcy and marriage settlements.A good Lawyer can guide you through the process

When we made our wills the solicitor advised against leaving any to named grandchildren. We have one daughter with 3 boys, a son who will probably have children and a son who almost certainly won't, so we decided to leave everything equally between the children and token amounts to any grandchildren.

My daughter's ex-partner's father named his grandchildren in his substantial will and my oldest grandchild will inherit a quarter of the estate when he reaches eighteen. Because my other grandson was born after he died he will inherit nothing. My daughter is dreading trying to explain this to the boys in a few years and is hoping that the older boy decides to share his inheritance. Their other brother has a different father which complicates it even more!

crossgranny that's interesting, I have not heard of bloodline wills.

I have 2 children and my civil partner has no children but a niece and nephew that she is very close to. We have left the money( If we haven't spent it all having a good time) to be divided between the 4 of them and they can decide if they need it themselves o if they will give some to their children. (One doesn't have children)

We're dividing everything 50/50 between our 2DDs. They can then decide how much they want to give their own children. Mind you, on the advice of financial advisors, we have started 'SKIing' (spending the kids inheritance) so if it all works out, all that will be left will be the house!

We recently decided to give our two children money now. To that end, they have had a huge chunk of our estate.

My husband, who has always 'looked after' our money (I know, I know, I will rightly be castigated for this but this was his profession and seems sensible - for now...) has had a bee in his bonnet for many years regarding the tax that would be liable on our estate.

His point of view is that we earnt every penny ourselves (true), were not left money from our parents (for varying reasons, also true), paid tax on our income's interest (true again) and is blowed if he will have the money taxed yet again when we die.

Initially I was unsure about the wisdom of his decision and we had many discussions about it. My daughters are in stable, happy marriages but should, in the future, these end, would our sons-in-law have the right to half of what was our hard-earned money, etc? Yup. However, my husband asked me if we trust our daughters and their husbands, which I do, and if so, what was I waiting for?

Anyway, his desire to thwart the tax man has prevailed and we have recently given our girls life-changing sums.

Our daughters are grateful (not that we were looking for gratitude) that they are freed from most monetary concerns and say that if push comes to shove, we can have it back again!

I completely understand that not everyone is in our position but if you have 'spare' money, dislike the idea of paying inheritance tax on what is all earned income, consider giving away some of your estate now!

Oh, we do have to live for seven years but I guess there is at least a disincentive for our girls to bump us off now - they've had much of the money!

We have two sons and only one son has three children. At present we have left half to the son without children and the other half to be held in trust for the grand-children when they reach eighteen year's of age.

The son with children is well off so we thought that it would be a start for the children later on.

We have a bit of a bone of contention about this. At the moment, our two children inherit equally, but we have a grandchild, and since his arrival, DH has been minded to alter our wills to leave a third to him and two thirds to the children. Much as I adore my grandson, he is our daughter's child and our son has no children of his own. We have already bought some shares for our grandson, and started a long term savings account. I think leaving him an equal share of everything else is too much, and unfair to our son. I think 10% would be more realistic and acceptable. DH does not agree. At the end of the day, as someone has said, it will all come down to what is left if either of us has to go into care, so the whole discussion might be academic!