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Money for young relatives, or for me?

(12 Posts)
Factfinder Wed 01-Jan-20 17:08:16

I have young relatives experiencing a few job struggles. I'm wondering if I should help them out a bit financially, or save what I have for my own care in old age. Anyone got experience or advice?

NotTooOld Wed 01-Jan-20 17:26:38

That's a difficult one, isn't it? I'm inclined to hold on to it unless it's a really desperate situation. The young relatives might be glad they don't have to help you out when the time comes. Perhaps you could lend them some rather than give it?

Factfinder Thu 02-Jan-20 18:39:31

Thanks @NotTooOld.

Urmstongran Thu 02-Jan-20 18:57:36

Maybe help them if you can? If you own your own property that’s your ‘safety net’?

DoraMarr Thu 02-Jan-20 19:16:42

You only have your savings and your pension. Your young relatives have the possibilities of improving their financial prospects, you don’t. These are uncertain times: spend your money on yourself or save it for YOUR future.

M0nica Thu 02-Jan-20 19:18:55

My first priority with my savings, is having enough money to pay for any care home fees I may need when I am older. I do not, under any circumstance have to rely on state provision.

Having said that there are plenty of ways of helping someone out when they are down on their luck. A big bag of groceries that means they do not need to go food shopping for a week, a weeks season ticket, or offer to pay fares to attend an interview. If you can afford it, without running down your savings, gifts in kind rather than cash are always best.

52bright Thu 02-Jan-20 19:44:15

I agree with Monica. We have given or loaned substantial amounts in the past but there comes a time as we get older that we have to look to our own future. As we are both now living on pensions we no longer save and have to dip into savings which cant be replaced for holidays or other extras. We find the way to go now is little and often. Buying the school coats/shoes a theatre treat which couldn't other wise be afforded or maybe a food shop at times like after Christmas when things can be tight for young families. We can no longer afford bigger gestures like buying a family holiday or contributing to a car for instance ...but I find that the small gestures we make are appreciated every bit as much as the greater help we were able to give when we were younger. Maybe this could be the way forward for you Factfinder.

Smileless2012 Thu 02-Jan-20 19:52:44

I agree with above posters Factfinder and think the advice offered by MOnica and 52bright is well worth taking on board.

Tangerine Thu 02-Jan-20 21:04:35

I agree with other posters that you should consider your own position and future first.

Only you know what money you have. If you're in a position to do so, perhaps you can do both - consider yourself but help your relatives a little bit. I don't think you should go without anything though.

Factfinder Sat 04-Jan-20 07:35:24

Thanks all, appreciate your help and comments.

BlueBelle Sat 04-Jan-20 07:42:04

I m in a similar position I have too many savings to get any government help but only enough to probably last me a year if I need help I feel I want to help my youngsters who some are struggling now instead of them perhaps getting anything when I disappear but scared to leave myself with little or nothing
It’s a bit of a dilemma isn’t it factfinder sorry I m no help at all 😊

dragonfly46 Sat 04-Jan-20 07:48:12

I agree with Dora. These are indeed unsettling times. We have helped the AC in the past but as we age we are considering what type of care we would like if necessary. We want to be in a position to choose the best available.