Skipping a generation

Speak to your solicitor to get this drawn up correctly. The law in England and Wales allows testamentary freedom meaning you can leave your estate as you think fit but this may mean setting up a trust, and doesn't mean the will can't be challenged by disgruntled relatives, which can damage and split up families well as possibly eating up part of the estate in fees. This is why you need watertight wills and why some people do leave small amounts to the people they otherwise wish to bypass as evidence that the testator has considered them and not forgotten them.

My grandfather left his very modest estate in trust for me and my brother and sister but we never saw a penny as the trustees (his son and solicitor) spent the money in untraceable ways. It turns out that not all trustees can be trusted.....

My mother left everything to my children. DH and I had been made bankrupt and she was afraid that, if she died before the bankruptcy was discharged, the Receiver would take the house. Of course after our 3 years of bankruptcy was over she forgot all about it and when she died the children still inherited. It turned out to be quite a simple matter for them to sign it over to us.

No problem. Just update your will and do a letter of intent which specifies why you are doing this. Saves any arguments over the will.

My parents put this in their will several years before they died. They didn’t change it after their fifth grandchild was born. However, very kindly, cousins and sisters agreed to split into the inheritance into five to include her.

I’ve just reread this entire thread, I remember some of the “complaints” about your DiL. I know this is a very difficult decision for you, but instead of potentially turning the whole world upside down AFTER your death, for your son and grandson, why not be open and honest and attempt to resolve your issues whilst you’re still alive with your DiL.

The smallest little unintended slights from our children’s partners can seem monumental to us, but often are without intention, malice and certainly not toxic in reality.

Mend the relationship now, and leave 25% of your estate to be split via any grandchildren and the remainder to your son, whom I assume loves you, his wife and his son. I can only feel such sorrow for him caught between his mother and his wife. If I was said wife, I would expect my husband to be on my side! It’s a truly awful situation, if you love your son please do your best to “fix this”

That’s right in principle Dinahmo, but the consent of all beneficiaries would be needed for a variation of the will - and the grandchild is a minor, incapable of giving consent. This isn’t a case of financial planning, it’s a case of seeking to prevent a child’s spouse from benefiting from the child’s inheritance.

People often skip a generation if they have sufficient wealth. Even if you change your mind and leave your wealth to your son, he, or your family can do a deed of arrangement which passes some wealth to the next generation.

If you’re serious about this, I’d think about a few things first, think about your son and how he’ll feel, maybe speak to him privately BEFORE you change your will (assuming you already have one), is this just your money (I know it’s yours now, but did this come to you via a husband?), how would your husband have felt about this?

Finally, if you’re truly serious, and I think it’s an awful idea btw, consult a solicitor.
Please, please think very carefully about how this might affect the relationship between your grandson and his parents.

You do not mention where you live? If you’re in England you can literally leave your money to whomever you like, might not be quite so easy in other countries.

Have thought about leaving it split between your son and grandson?

You don’t say what your relationship with your son is like, just the dil. I would think very hard about the hurt it could cause to your son. At the end of the day, you’ll be gone, so why make waves for everyone. Revenge isn’t a good look in my opinion.

You could leave money to GS and as not an adult someone other than parents as a Trustee. I can't see any reason why money can't be left directly but issue may be your GS being allowed to access account as a lot of banks have age limits eg 16. Whilst in England and Wales you can exclude your offspring, in Scotland they always have a claim ie 1/3 of your removable estate between them. If your removable estate is worth 30K, 1/3 - 10K goes to offspring. If more than 1 then it's to be shared equally.

My Grandfather left my brother all his money,skipping his 3 sons,my brother had the money spent with in a month.

My parents left their money to our children quite simply because we don’t need it. There were no problems when they died as the wills were quite clear.

Might not be applicable for you, but we’ve put money into S&S junior ISAs for the Gdcs, only accessible after they’re 18.

My Grandparents skipped generation with my parents blessing. I will possibly do the same. I think the next generation are going to need all the help they can get student loans pension age going up etc. Its up to you entirely what you put in your will

Who would inherit if grandson dies? What if your son gets divorced and remarried with more children? You are not looking further than end of your nose!

Yes definetly take a solicitors advice.

Why not leave a little bit to your son and the majority of it to your grandson.

This is a little odd who will be executor of your will and who will sort out your affairs and organise your funeral if it is your son i dont think that is fair tbh but if its not then the person doing all the work desetves something and then leave the rest to your grandson

Yes I have experience of it. My GM left everything to me in her will, house jewellery money. This was in the 70s and I was over 21 at the time. There was a very good reason why but that wasn't mentioned in the will. Father didn't contest it and it went through smoothly.

I have done this and stipulated they can’t have it till 25 was done quickly and simply

We did this- discussed it with our children and they agreed. GC ×3 are married buying their own homes so like so many young people finding it difficult. Organised with the help of a solicitor.

I have a will leaving everything to my nephew. No mention is made of my sibling or her children. But then I have no children of my own so its far less complicated. I just picked the family member I am closest to. Im sure my sister is not expecting anything as I have made my wishes quite clear.

As already said if you live in Scotland your son can still claim against your estate. Not the house but all money etc..

Germanshepherdsmum

I think this will cause terrible animosity, with the child in the middle of it. Hatred is not a good legacy to leave.

Why in the world would anyone want their last words, after the will reading (from the grave), 'you meant nothing to me - I hate you'?

Cutting one's children out of one's estate is a terrible legacy.

I have done exactly that. Bypassed our DD and left everything in trust to the three GC until they are 25 .