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Legal, pensions and money

Fed up of being skint!

(76 Posts)
HowNowBrownCow Mon 25-Aug-25 18:01:10

I haven’t been this skint for about 30 odd years. I really don’t like this feeling of being out of control and beginning to teeter on the brink of being in debt. We have always managed to live within our means and budget well but it’s getting tighter despite cutting back as much as we can. We still have a small mortgage of almost 7k which we have been overpaying on for years. I have had to stop the overpayments, ours like many folks water bill has doubled. The supermarket bill continues to rise, I am profoundly disabled and diabetic so try to eat healthily. We cook from scratch to try to eek our food out further especially important as we still have 2 kids in their early 20’s living at home who pay their way but not in highly paid jobs.
We live in the SE England. I feel so lost in it all and so depressed I could cry. Can’t go out and do anything for fear of spending what we don’t have.
I stupidly thought that at 60 life would be a bit easier. Can anyone relate to this situation? What are you doing to make your money go further? Thanks for any advice

HowNowBrownCow Tue 26-Aug-25 13:57:02

Dear all, huge thanks for your support and kind words. We claim what we are entitled to, we’re on a water meter and the outreach worker at the food bank we volunteered at helped me claim £50 one off from our local council hardship fund last month. I can ask again next year if I am still in need. I have £1.66 to last until September 1st and will ask for help from the food bank. I am sorry for anyone having to go through this and my heart goes out to you petalpete. Best wishes to you all.

Chocolatelovinggran Tue 26-Aug-25 13:58:13

HowNowBrownCow, I was sorry to read your post : that is a miserable way of living.
May I add another cheer for foodbanks?
You'll receive a parcel of food for each adult, extra items such as loo rolls and shower gel, fresh fruit and vegetables and cup of tea or coffee, and, hopefully a warm welcome and a bit of banter!
If some products don't suit you, we have a " swap box", or you could just return them to us.
The systems vary, but ours allows up to twelve visits per year, so you could come once a month and collect four parcels of food, some fresh vegetables and toiletries.

Chocolatelovinggran Tue 26-Aug-25 13:59:14

Crossed posts, OP - good call !

CBBL Tue 26-Aug-25 14:02:17

I feel your pain HowNowBrownCow!
I am retired, twice widowed, rent a house and claim Attendance Allowance because I have Arthritis and am Partially sighted.
I don’t qualify for anything else because I have a small Private Pension.
My rent is £795 per month, almost half of my income! I do get the single persons reduction in Council Tax, but that’s all. I struggle to save for unexpected costs (repairs/maintenance to my Power Chair etc).
Have already been to CAB, who seemed to think that I had no cause to complain.
Like you, I can’t recall when I last had a holiday and have no nearby relatives.
I buy “pre-loved” clothes when I need something new.
The news is depressing - but it does make you realise that plenty of people are worse off (Gaza/Ukraine etc).
It is hard to stay cheerful these days!

jocork Tue 26-Aug-25 14:02:32

I feel for you too. Despite having some small pensions on top of the state pension I am struggling. My income is too high for pension credit, but I suspect that some on pension credit will get more than me because of all the other benefits that kick in with it. I still have a mortgage, my house needs work but I can't afford to do it and I worry that I may struggle to sell it to downsize. Yesterday I cancelled a direct debit for a monthly charity donation as I realised I just can't afford it any more! It made me sad!

Suzejp Tue 26-Aug-25 14:09:48

If you're on AA I think you can apply for discount on your council tax bill as well as single occupancy.
Also check on pension credit as the rate you can earn (pensions etc) went up.
It's still hard work living on a state pension and small amount of extra pension x

mabon2 Tue 26-Aug-25 14:11:30

Have you claimed all benefits and allowances available? There are thousands in the same boat but just get on with it best they can without complaining to the world. My water bill has doubled and I'm on a water meter, of course everyone has to pay for food and pay the mortgage. Do you need the house in which you live, could you downsize? Contact the utility supplier for Water maybe you could get a reduction for the water bill. Why not ask the children to stump up more toward housekeeping? Go to CAB who might be able to help. I would be willing to pay an extra penny on tax to help others although I live on a very modest pension.

Elsi Tue 26-Aug-25 14:17:40

Ask your children to stump up more

icanhandthemback Tue 26-Aug-25 14:27:28

It is a really troubling time for the disabled. Changes coming in must be very scary when you are already feeling the pinch. There are apps where you can get discounted food for next to nothing. Often it is fruit or veg going out of date which you can freeze to help with your diet. My daughter batch cooks too so she can eke out food. She has reduced protein portion sizes a little and bulks out with veg which helps.

kittylester Tue 26-Aug-25 14:35:31

I suggest that you get a benefits check.

Flutterby345 Tue 26-Aug-25 14:48:10

From Australia, where else.
If it's yellow let it mellow. If it's brown flush it down.
Cuts the water bill.

Sarahr Tue 26-Aug-25 15:11:33

Contact waterboard. We have a reduced rate as DH has health issues. Shop around for utility deals. Don't stay with the same provider. Look at bank and savings accounts. We put our money into a high(ish) interest rate savings. Pay a required amount into a reward account, take out the balance back into the high interest account, leaving enough for regular monthly payments. The rewards we save to trade up for when we need it. Juggling the money around soon makes the pennies add up, albeit a bit of a faff. Use shop loyalty cards as these add up too.

Nougat Tue 26-Aug-25 15:14:35

You say "we have still have 2 kids in their early 20s living at home" so I assume you have a partner who is also below state pension age and still working.

If you have three adults in the house who are working full time (are they?), even earning only minimum wage, the take home pay per person (after tax and NIC but excluding any workplace pension contributions) is £21,800. Times three that is £65,400 a year coming in or £5,450 a month.

Repayments on a £7,000 mortgage borrowed now over ten years would be less than £80 a month.

I think you need to sit down as a family and look at what’s coming and what’s going out. If need be, your adult children will have to contribute more. I wager they would find living independently much more expensive than whatever they contribute to the household now.

Juicylucy Tue 26-Aug-25 15:14:52

Over the weekend I received 3 emails informing me of price increases for my sky package, Affinity water and RAC breakdown. I’ve called all 3 today and told them I’d like to discuss the increase and would like a better deal…. Guess what I got all 3 down to much nearer to what they were. You have to challenge these increases like Martin Lewis tells us. Please look at your household bills see if you’re able to get better prices.

Charleygirl5 Tue 26-Aug-25 15:29:06

There are four adults living in that house, so I doubt if they would benefit from having a water meter fitted.

Can you receive an Attendance Allowance if receiving PIP? I do, but I am 81, so I am too old to receive PIP.

DsNanny Tue 26-Aug-25 15:38:43

How much are the adult children contributing to the house ? Do they have excess money for luxuries - I’m guessing they do. No household with 3 able bodied (you haven’t mentioned your husband has any disabilities) adults working full time, should be that skint that they have £1.66 to last them another week.

In fact if these ‘children’ are working then bills should be split equally.

kittylester Tue 26-Aug-25 15:55:43

Flutterby345

From Australia, where else.
If it's yellow let it mellow. If it's brown flush it down.
Cuts the water bill.

That was on day time tev here about 20 years ago. We've been saying it for ages.

dalrymple23 Tue 26-Aug-25 16:08:19

I am confused about water meters. We inherited one when we bought this house last year. There was an article in the paper several months ago which stated that if you have erratic telephone or internet connections, a false reading can be sent to the water companies. Does anyone know anything about this?

Thisisme Tue 26-Aug-25 16:35:28

It may depend on region but I know our water meter has to be read by someone coming out to do it - 'a screwdriver to lift the lid (located on the pavement outside the house) then take a photo of the meter.' was what I was told when complaining about our very high reading. Turns out we had a leak which meant our 6 month bill was 7 times higher than last time ( about £1200 to find, no sympathy from the water company except to spread it over a few months). I'll be reading the meter myself once a month from now on.

Flakesdayout Tue 26-Aug-25 17:32:21

HowNowBrownCow. You cannot receive Attendance Allowance and PIP. It is either one or the other. PIP has a higher payment once awarded depending on the band you get. It is now harder to get so if you are about to claim get some professional help. As you have reached 60 you get free prescriptions and eye tests and a bus pass if you are not working, but if you are disabled that may not be of any use for you.
As for budgeting - write down everything that you have coming in and everything that goes out regularly and see if anything can be cut. Contact all of your utility etc providers as some have a discounted rate for certain conditions. Dont be scared to try and haggle. I stopped all of my charity donations, hated doing it but had to draw the line. I get state pension and a small private one so cannot claim pension credit. My partner works so at the moment we manage ok but I am still careful and look out for food reductions and freeze what I can. I have noticed that my food bill keeps creeping up and I am lucky enough that I can get out and look out for the bargains. Could your children/husband do this at the weekend maybe, or an early morning shop? Iceland have a 10% off your shopping on a Tuesday, with a bonus card, not sure if this can be done online, and some of their food is reasonable. Good to Go is another helpful site, where food bags are discounted. As others have said use the food bank and food kitchens. Another way to save is to grow some simple foods in the garden, runner beans, tomatoes, and save water when you wash up and use this to water the garden. You probably have done all of this but you do have my sympathy as is can be so tough at times.

Nanny27 Tue 26-Aug-25 17:41:14

I agree that all adults in a house should be paying equally. It seems a long conversation is in order

Etoile2701 Tue 26-Aug-25 17:52:11

I agree. Having to live on a pension ain't easy. Haven't had a holiday for over a year and then our daughters paid for it. Haven't been abroad since before Brexit and Covid and won't now.

HowNowBrownCow Tue 26-Aug-25 17:57:32

Nougat

You say "we have still have 2 kids in their early 20s living at home" so I assume you have a partner who is also below state pension age and still working.

If you have three adults in the house who are working full time (are they?), even earning only minimum wage, the take home pay per person (after tax and NIC but excluding any workplace pension contributions) is £21,800. Times three that is £65,400 a year coming in or £5,450 a month.

Repayments on a £7,000 mortgage borrowed now over ten years would be less than £80 a month.

I think you need to sit down as a family and look at what’s coming and what’s going out. If need be, your adult children will have to contribute more. I wager they would find living independently much more expensive than whatever they contribute to the household now.

Thanks Nougat. We have never had anything like 65k a year, husband is a full time carer, number works ft but number 2 is on a contract where he’s only called in when they need him. He applies for scores of jobs per week. Cannot downsize, as we moved to this house after spinal cord injury because it’s adapted to suit my needs plus no one would give us a new mortgage as we don’t have the income to support it.
I realise that it’s not just us and we really do try to remain positive. I was at a low yesterday, I usually just crack on.

StripeyGran Tue 26-Aug-25 17:57:53

Flutterby345

From Australia, where else.
If it's yellow let it mellow. If it's brown flush it down.
Cuts the water bill.

What a life. Can't flush the toilet, use an electric blanket to keep warm, grow your own food, use a food bank.

Talking of which , OP do you have The Bread and Butter Thing in your area?

jenpax Tue 26-Aug-25 18:06:38

Primrose53

Have you spoken to your Diabetes nurse? My friend who has not long retired was a Diabetes Nurse Specialist with decades of experience. She helped and supported her patients very much.

You shouldn’t have to, but could you use a foodbank? I know it’s nearly all tins and packets which may not be ideal for your diabetes diet but there are also Community Fridges which also have fresh items.

I really feel for you so do try and talk to your nurse. Are you claiming Attendance Allowance?

She is too young for Attendance Allowance