Jimmy Savile

Have asked gransnet to remove what I have written. Thank you JO2 for pointing out the error of my ways as I know you never stray from the main subject on posts or trivialise them in any way.

Oh, come on crimson. You weren't the only one sharing their experiences - I don't think you were singled out!

No-one who has experienced something that made them feel uncomfortable as a child, and wasn't able to say so at the time, should be made to feel that they can't mention it as an adult. It doesn't matter to me where they say it. The day we all feel able to shout that an adult has behaved inappropriately towards a child, and be listened to, I will start to believe that our society is interested in keeping all children safe. Too many adults don't want to hear the testimony of abused children. We owe it to them to feel at least some discomfort about what has hurt them, so we can get better at preventing child abuse.

Not meaning children! I was thinking about all the magazine stories of my youth which featured romance between older boss and young secretary/ doctor & nurse/ professor and student. And the archetype Mr Rochester of course.

crimson it's your choice, your post, but its value speaks volumes. How interesting that you got a reaction that made you want to retract it. Just like lots of other children, and adults who get a negative reaction when they are brave enough to speak up

I am SO sorry crimson! I didn't mean to upset you.

It's just that I had an uncle who things I can't talk about. There, I've said it.

I will probably wish I hadn't.

Something in me starts yelling "yes. me too!"

I'll get off here now.

Jingle

I can stay away from the thread.

I'm learning all the time that there are quite a few Gransnetters with a real appreciation of what some children have had to put up with, and have quietly got on with their lives, and ensured the children they know get to feel more secure.

jingle you have kind of explained why you were imho crass in your dismissal of crimson. Not kind though. Times like this make me wonder why I bother with gn at all. As you say - I could ignore the site.

Going back to Jimmy Savile, I do appreciate that it's going to be hard for his relatives (one was on the radio a day or so ago) but I think that all sorts of things may come out in the near future.

I realise that he cannot be brought to book, but if it means that in future colleagues will not turn a blind eye to anything untoward, then that can only be for the good.

Both Esther Rantzen and Paul Gambaccini have indicated that they feel somehow implicit.

(not very well put, but hopefully you know what I mean)

when you're right. It is important to be believed when you are brave enough to come out and say you feel or think that something that happened was wrong. Especially if it's a person in authority or a public figure or a family member that made you feel that way. J04 and crimson to you both. I was a very immature and naive 19 year old.

Crimson thank you for your post where you mention experiences you have had. JO4 I thought your initial response was a bit like telling Crimson to shut up when she had been brave enough to mention such things at a personal level.

But then you explained and it just goes to show how difficult it all is for those of us who suffered abuse of one form or another as children/young adults.

I have a family member from my childhood who I don't think I should talk about. That caused me so much anxiety as a child.

The other stuff in offices and so on, plenty of that from married men. They wouldn't get away with it these days.

I was immature and so naive as a teenager. I observed other girls chasing after pop stars and managing to get in cars and hotel rooms, and just assumed it was all very exciting. It was years before I realised that 'groupies' should have been protected from themselves and potential abusers, and that 'bouncers' letting girls through security cordons were complicit in helping abuse to take place.

I'm thinking Monica Lewinsky here. I do feel that Bill Clinton was a truly great president but look how he survived her accusations and she almost became [well, probably did] a figure of fun.

I take your point, but Monica Lewinsky was old enough to look out for herself, (or should have been) either way she was an adult in the eyes of the law.

I think in the Jimmy Savile case, it was a very different matter, but I suppose time will tell.

Not sure at this stage if I will watch the programme tonight or not.

crimson and JO4, this is a difficult thread, but times were different then.
I was indecently assaulted when I'd just left home and was living alone in a bedsit.
I was also date raped by a young man I adored, and I didn't tell anyone about either incident.

It was very difficult.
My heart is now pounding.

I was indecently assaulted when I was 15 as I was walking home after seeing my boyfriend (yes, how gallant was he!). Although he had his hand over my mouth I managed to scream and he ran away - I just carried on walking home, on trembling legs, but I never told anyone because I would have been stopped from going out in the evening!
The Jimmy Savile allegations are a different kettle of fish, though. He was in a position of power and young girls looked up to him - I bet not one of those girls had sex on her mind when she went into his dressing room with him. Times have certainly changed.

The "position of power" thing was what I meant a page or so back, when I referred to abuse carried out by priests.

phoenix Too important to accuse or investigate. That was the problem with abusive priests and more than likely with Jimmy Savile, especially as the alleged abuse happened at a time when it was regarded as a rather less serious concern than it is now. Does anybody remember that hideous expression "kiddy fiddler"? Says it all. [disgust emoticon]

No matter how liberated we are I wonder if there will always be an undercurrent of 'men can't help themselves and it's up to women to not 'lead them on' in some way, even when young? When my children were young I never allowed men to babysit, although some in our babysitting circle did, and a very dear friend of ours would offer to look after them. It wasn't that I didn't trust them but I didn't want to come home to have my children mention something that would set off alarm bells which would result in my making false accusations of any kind.

Oh heavens yes! Vile phrase.

When I was 11 I was staying with a friend and sleeping in a double bed with her when we heard her father come through the front door and make his way into the room she begged me to pretend to be asleep, and I shall never forget the smell of drink on his breath or his hand outstretched to his daughter and the sound of astonishment he made when he realised. I was there. He fled the room and she lay there shaking and pale. We said nothing to each other, but even my innocent11 year old brain knew there was something wrong. I never mentioned it to anyone,he was a friend of my Mother, a well known character(and drinker) around Edinburgh , but it has haunted me and I still wish I had said something. My friend and I lost touch but met a few years ago, she never married, and is a nervous recluse. The point of this is that their are a lot of people out their who have been abused by people who were in a position of power, and therefore, however painful it is for the relations and friends of Jimmy Savile, this should not be dropped and swept under the carpet. Ana and Ella how frightening and distressing for you.

Ana Ella you are brave to disclose how you were harmed when you were young. I hope you recovered enough to tuck the memory away without it damaging you for life, as happens with so many young people. Those experiences have been recounted by many women, and the last time I looked, 1 in 6 people say they have been attacked, abused or subjected to indecent exposure. It just goes to show how the collective support amongst women helps them speak out. Those women who have come forward about Jimmy Savile will get great comfort from knowing they are believed and are not alone.