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So. Kate is obviously not going to be told what to do..........

(101 Posts)
jO5 Sat 22-Dec-12 16:20:04

spending it with her family this year

Good for her. smile

No pressure on Mrs Middletone there then!

CHEELU Sun 23-Dec-12 10:57:39

sorry crimson dont understand

crimson Sun 23-Dec-12 11:02:06

You said 'it ends here'. I didn't understand. I assumed the thread because I can kill a thread a twenty paces sad.

CHEELU Sun 23-Dec-12 11:04:01

No I meant the argument. I just dont want to waist my time on GN arguing.

CHEELU Sun 23-Dec-12 11:05:29

off now to sort out my- bought a chicken instead of Turkey problem, have a good day..

crimson Sun 23-Dec-12 11:07:45

It's a discussion, not an arguement smile.

CHEELU Sun 23-Dec-12 11:08:21

yes but I get sooo stressed I like things to be pleasant...

CHEELU Sun 23-Dec-12 11:10:29

and for me its alot to do with attitude--I am fine to discuss things but its when people get personal that I get annoyed..

jO5 Sun 23-Dec-12 11:13:31

Sorry about name remark. Appreciate it was an error. HQ would change it. Better wait till after Xmas though. smile

Elegran Sun 23-Dec-12 11:14:28

So why did you turn it unpleasant yourself by weighing in with a diatribe which you must have known would raise argument? Being pleasant works both ways.

If you want to say something strongly, be prepared for strong disagreement. If you don't want any ripples, don't throw stones into the water. You can't have it both ways.

Ana Sun 23-Dec-12 11:15:22

Well said, Elegran.

CHEELU Sun 23-Dec-12 11:24:39

I aired my opinion, can you point out to me what exactly was wrong with that--I could say the same of any other opinion--I think what you are trying to say is that it was never going to be a popular opinion but that does not worry me I still stand by my opinion

gracesmum Sun 23-Dec-12 11:26:28

We all have our own opinion on the Royal Family and are entitled to it, but it is just that - an opinion. We do not know what the Queen felt about Princess Diana, we do not know that she did not mourn, much of what is offered as fact is conjecture as in the film "The Queen" - some good, some bad. You ask what has she done, vq (I think) - does she need to do anything? Former monarchs did a tiny fraction of what the Queen does - but what she does do is spread a lot of happiness wherever she visits and it is all good for business, not to mention national morale. Why should she abdicate/retire? It is not a job - it is something she was born to. And as for costing the country a fortune - I think that is highly unlikely. So let's stop knocking her with such conviction - as I said these are only opinions, mine included.

jO5 Sun 23-Dec-12 11:27:55

Don't get stressed CHEELU. Not worth it. smile

I must get on with jobs! hmm

petallus Sun 23-Dec-12 12:16:42

It's okay to have strong opinions on the Monarchy, in both directions.

It's okay to express those opinions, in both directions, on Gransnet.

It's fairly common knowledge that the Royal family did not like Diana. She was a thorn in their flesh.

Even if she wasn't bumped off, her death got rid of a lot of problems she was causing for the Monarchy.

I don't want the Queen to abdicate. I hope she goes on as long as she can because I don't want Charles and Camilla ruling over us.

Elegran Sun 23-Dec-12 12:19:20

cheelu nothing you said was wrong - it was an opinion. You are entitled to have that opinion. but others are entitled to have other opinions, and may argue with you. You found that unpleasant, but it was argument on the opinion, it was not personal. The bottom line is, if you can freely express your opinion, then others can freely express theirs, without you needing to feel that you being got at as a person.

As for it not being a popular opinion of the monarchy in general or the queen in particular, if you look back over past threads you will see that there are posts on both sides - sometimes getting quite heated. In a way, your post comes soon after some other exchanges on other threads so a few posters are a bit sensitive on the subject.

petallus Sun 23-Dec-12 12:36:57

It did get personal. How about:

A V sign

A loaded question about CHEELU's name being shouted.

Accusations of unpleasantness and the phrase 'weighing in with a diatribe'

A 'well said' to that from somebody else.

All quite mild by GS standards of the past and perfectly normal in heated debate.

However, not sticking strictly to the point under discussion but straying off into personal comments.

Incidentally, I was quite taken aback when someone earlier linked Christianity and belief in the Monarchy.

Elegran Sun 23-Dec-12 12:52:42

Mine was not meant to be a personal comment, just commenting on Cheelu's wanting things to be pleasant and uncontroversial while posting a fairly strong opinion, which was pretty sure to attract an opposite reaction. And it was quite a diatribe, except to those who share her opinion. If she took it personally, then of course I am sorry, but it was not meant that way.

I can't answer for JO5's posts - no-one can do that but JO5 herself.

CHEELU Sun 23-Dec-12 12:56:30

Ok Elergran I take your comments and learn from them, you live and learn even at our age!

jO5 Sun 23-Dec-12 13:03:34

It was a royal V sign. wink If anyone can't take a joke, not much I can do about that. hmm

We have had all the arguments before. This was meant to be just a chatty little thread. Now it is only worth knocking on the head.

"I can't answer for JO5's posts - no-one can do that but JO5 herself."

JO5 hasn't got anything more to say really.

She really hasn't!

Elegran Sun 23-Dec-12 13:08:36

Glad you are OK with it, cheelu I don't like unpleasantness either. Stick by your opinions (unless you are persuaded out of them by someone's sensible and unaggressive answers) and don't feel that "they" are out to get you. GN is a great place for discussion and advice, though sometimes people answer too fast, before they have thought a bit, and sometimes misunderstandings happen.

Elegran Sun 23-Dec-12 13:11:09

Jings If you are really speechless that must be a first!

Nanado Sun 23-Dec-12 13:36:55

I think it was what lilygran said that turned the argument from an opinion expressed by cheelu into something more personal, which is what petallus spotted too. I'm not sure where Elegran is coming from as strong opinions being posted are one thing while an attack on a person, rather than their option, in quite another.

petallus Sun 23-Dec-12 14:02:17

JO5 the royal V was funny.

And I was impressed that you apologised for the capital letters comment.

I shouldn't have included you.

I wanted to make the point that, contrary to what some people say, we on GN don't always just stick to robust argument about the topic in hand but descend into accusations, trivialisation, personal slights, attempts to silence those with alternative views and so on.

Just like in real life.

But what the heck!

soop Sun 23-Dec-12 14:37:58

jings As I said yesterday, on a different thread, ...deep breath, shoulders back, chest out and smile smile smile...always a winner!

vampirequeen Sun 23-Dec-12 15:33:47

It seems that some people on here can't see beyond their admiration of the Royal family and feel that any comment which is in anyway negative has to be shot down in flames in any way possible. As I've said previously I'm happy to take part in reasoned debate however some people simply resort to personal attacks and unfortunately swearing. As the royal V was aimed at me, I don't find it particularly funny. I have no problem with swearing I simply object to being sworn at.

I've checked the Gransnet rules and they state...'...we will remove postings that ...contain personal attacks...'

I was attacked as soon as I joined. Not for my views on Royalty but because someone decided they didn't like my username. If I remember correctly I was told by one person that she didn't like my name and she didn't like me.

Fortunately I had some supportive PMs from other members so I chose to stay but I could just as easily left totally disheartened and unnerved by the whole experience.