Sex cases in the news

X is dead now, it just wasn't talked about in the early 70s, even the family doctor when I returned to the UK realised she needed send me for treatment but still could not talk about the reason for it. My mother just assumed i would not be interested in another man anyway, my Father died 3 days after my return to the UK and she assumed as she was on her own that would suit me too, I was 20 by then,,,umm.
Now I have written some down,,, I am adopted, father desperate for children Mother never!!!!!!!, only gave in to agree to adopt when my dad threatened to leave her.
When i was small and people asked if i was her daughter she used to say 'well I look after her'. Insisted on a girl as she had a dependant brother and Sister and I was brought up to understand by her that my role was to look after them. Not my dad but he worked so hard I hardly saw him.
I married the first older handsome Army officer who came along, stupid enough to think you could not get pregnant the first time you had sex.
She is 95 this month in an excellent care home, and i have lived as far away as possible from her as I can. Thereis a lot more to it, some of the things she has done have been horrendous, she did actually go to the Social Services to try and get custody of my oldest son, she is obsessed with him, he lives well away, he was the only one of my 3 my Dad saw. The other 2 she just ignores completely, used to give the oldest one 10£ and the other two 50p.!!!!Got to stop now or I never will.

Nobody on GN seems to think like me, that the 10pm BBC TV Worls News is the right place for all this. When we are facing worldwide spying by the US and Google, 30% of people in Syria are homeless or on the run etc etc that this is the place for 3 accounts of teenagers being groped decades ago.
I can just imagine their pre-news conferences. Ok guys! we'll bring on those three case and now we can all go home. Because nothing else counts as NEWS on the BBC. - Oh we had the French President but he wasn't talking.

Bye the way if one of those women was 15 in 1965/67 how come she is still in her 60s I make her over 70. I don't know why she is doing this after all this time. As usually happens they will not be any happier.

I keep wondering whether any members of our Church Youth Club have become famous in the meantime.

I was 15 in 1966 and I'm only 62!

Gosh, that's very harsh Margaret and dismissive of the women.

There is a misconception that this behaviour by the various 'celebrities' was an odd grope here and there. From what I've read it was systematic sexual harassment that went on for decades.

A couple of grans on here have long professional experience of working with sex offenders and they seem to take it seriously.

I wouldn't think it a minor misdeamour it a daughter or granddaughter of mine had her breasts fondled at work, and that the bosses knew about it but just shrugged it off.

When I saw the original reports I thought ok here we go, I was 15 in 1970 so these women would be about 65.
There are many more important hings happening in the World every day.Unfortunately the BBC seem to like to think that the people they broadcast to are more interested in media caes than the real world. I do not live in the UK so see other news channels and get another side of many things, it always surprises my friends to see that the BBC actually use soap operas as news items !!!

When I saw the original reports I thought ok here we go, I was 15 in 1970 so these women would be about 65.
There are many more important hings happening in the World every day.Unfortunately the BBC seem to like to think that the people they broadcast to are more interested in media caes than the real world. I do not live in the UK so see other news channels and get another side of many things, it always surprises my friends to see that the BBC actually use soap operas as news items !!!

There is a perfectly good case to be made that if you start minimising the seriousness of more minor sexual assaults then you legitimise them and thus also legitimise more serious assaults.
Very important that powerful men should get the idea that it will not be condoned. I have no sympathy for these 3 that are in court. Here is the Liz Kershaw DJ link and I think it is a shocking story. I heard her on the radio when she told it.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-19856081

My sympathies felice I had a violent first husband as well. The fact that we feel ashamed as victims is very sad.

JessM yes it was always made out to be our fault wasn't it. x

ana you are right. A senior moment!

I defend myself, I am a feminist, but we are losing the plot here. Most girls, young and older women are at more risk IN THEIR OWN HOMES.

When does the BBC bring along 10 -or 20 of those cases which the police my have been able to bring to court. Never because it is not NEWS but more a Panorama programme And that would be better for these ageing lechers who we have to look at trudging into court. True the BBC did that with Saville but still like to show his photo again, and again, and again.

I watch German of French news, and then like to tune into BBC before I go to bed. Its like being on a different planet what the BBC considers to be important.

German or French.
I've been in bed with Bronchitis, not yet 100%.

Much respect, Felice. I hope being able to disclose some of what you endured will bring you some peace.

Yes some of us have been at risk in our own homes. But that is not excuse is it for men who have abused their position.
I can empathise with the lying about injuries Felice I remember my PGCE tutor asking my why i had a black eye and saying I'd had an accident. Also telling the doctor that an injury to my coccyx was result of a fall.

I'm shocked that some posters seem to be saying the BBC initiated the criminal investigations into 'groping'. The police began an investigation as a result of the JS scandal, which identified crimes. Some of the alleged criminals are standing trial, how can that be wrong.
JessM is right when she says that tolerating 'groping' or what some seem to see as insignificant sexual assaults then you legitimise them. The 3 cases currently in Court are all serious offences. The only one that could possibly be considered less serious, is a man who is alleged to have sexually harassed, and at time indecently assaulted women for over 40 years. I don't see these women as 'pathetic' for not having reacted more forcefully, or speaking up about it immediately. Every office I worked in, until I went into social work in the late 1970's, had its resident groper but that doesn't mean it was acceptable.

Felice and much respect for speaking about it here.

Wouldn't it be wonderful if 'minor' offences like groping could be stopped with a quick reprimand from the boss. The problem is it didn't work & it still happened/still happens. It's not just the groping it's what else goes with it such as offers of promotion if you let it happen & demotion & vilification if you don't - that 'minor' behaviour held many women to ransom & lost them jobs & confidence. This is why I think there is such an explosion of cases now, especially as the JS business opened up the issues & gave people the courage to come forward (&, I suspect, even more still haven't). Unfortunately nothing else but court action is likely to bring about change.
Are the majority really jumping on a bandwagon or just finding safety in numbers? Victims are often encouraged to speak out as it will help other victims come forward or may stop others suffering the same. Some feel guilty if they stay quiet & then discover the perpetrator went on to harm others. There'll always be the exceptions but give victims a break - coming forward is a hard thing to do. I've worked with many individuals & groups, often in major youth organisations, who have been vilified & had lives & health damaged by their organisations reactions to them when they've exposed abuse. Yes, families & organisations do get unsettled by being challenged but the fault lies in the general acceptance of disrespectful/abusive behaviour. I fear this window of opportunity for victims will not last much longer as the vilification of them intensifies. Those that are disturbed by the current court actions will soon be able to return to 'normal'.

I had a violent first husband too, but I fought back and nearly killed him. But then I was born quite strong and other women aren't.
Personally, I think women need to fight back more and not depend on the law to defend them.

Gadabout is spot on in my opinion. Recent cases exemplify the way in which organisations tend to mirror societal values. Current examples are the cases involving groups of men, who target vulnerable youngsters, often those who have learning difficulties, in order to sexually abuse them, and to make money from selling them on to other predatory men. The fact that sw, police, teachers, health workers etc could conclude these youngsters were making 'life choices' is shocking. I have experience of attempting to initiate police/sw investigations into the fact that taxi drivers were picking up children from residential homes on a regular basis. Many of the girls who came back 3 days later, disoriented and making what were seen as fairly wild allegations were simply not believed. Their stories were seen as unbelievable in many cases. The girls were in residential care because of their vulnerability and the fact they were difficult to care for, so foster placements broke down. Their behaviour was difficult, no doubt about that, and that complicated things. I also felt it enabled the problem to be put on the 'to hard list'. Thankfully, 25 years later, the problem has been acknowledged and attempts are being made to prosecute where appropriate, and to try and work with these youngsters more proactively.

I sometimes feel that the issue of sexual abuse of children, and adults, is just too difficult for many people, and that leads to the minimisation or denial that continues to happen.

And the groping culture is obviously alive and well in the Lib Dems. Well alive anyway. And very embarrassing. But Lord Rennard obviously not willing to admit that he has done anything wrong. Much to the party leader's chagrin.
Hopefully now the political parties will set up systems that enable women to report problems like this and have them dealt with (as there are in workplaces)

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-25764255

I think it's easy to forget the shame and embarrassment that victims/survivors of all sorts of sexual assaults feel. What is a 'grope' for one person is a major assault putting another person in fear of her life, leaving psychological damage from which they might never recover. It's not just the physical act but the threat and being powerless to prevent it happening. When reported, some people say just enough to be believed, keeping much more to themselves about what occurred. I have seen awful consequences from a woman being made to watch herself being 'groped' in a ladies' toilet mirror by a man who went in to clean them. She had a mental breakdown. He got a probation order. She hadn't said that he had used degrading insults and threats at the time, but did disclose this when it got to court and her barrister said it was looking unlikely for a conviction. She made further disclosures and had to endure her trauma being played out all over again. She went straight from court to hospital.

We will no doubt hear more as the days go by. The transcripts of interviews done before decisions to prosecute will contain much of what convinced the CPS to prosecute, and it's common for there to be more than the public get to know prior to the case coming to court.

Am a little confused by the Ken Roach story, on the radio news just now it was stated that the young lady who was apparently raped by him was again assaulted by him when she 'returned to his home a few weeks/months later' Why go back? Obviously I haven't heard the full story.

Flower - that's a bit like asking why women who suffer all manner of abuse in their relationships go back. Remember, we're talking about a minor here, and a much older man. Why was she invited back?

See your point Iam she was just a child.

I'm finding the trial details of these 3 men dispiriting, to say the least. I genuinely believe that for people who have either not experienced it, or 'worked' with those who have experienced/perpetrated it, it must be so difficult to accept its prevalence. Being exposed to it is a painful experience for victims and workers. It takes courage to survive, as so many thoughtful contributors to this thread show.

Agree Iam64 I too know it happens and those in a position of trust will often abuse it. I talk from personal knowledge and have also worked with those who have been severely abused, sexually, mentally and physically. I only said 'apparently', not to undermine the woman in question, but because it is still ongoing in the courts. Maybe my comment was too flippant and I apologise for that.

Thanks for all your kind thoughts and good wishes, I feel as though a door has been opened being able to talk about things here.
I remember doing a summer job also in the 70s and being warned by a woman in the office which men not to get into the lift alone with, also had a member of my staff later who just couldn't seem to help himself, it didn't matter how many times he was told off, next week someone else would be in my office. He was a much needed volunteer/part timer, and really did think it was all a big joke.!!!!!! he just seemed to need to grope. sad really.

Does any man really need to grope? Can a man just "not help himself" in the company of a woman?