We have paid in a massive amount more than we have ever had out and even the money we have had we couldn't spend how we wanted to.
Certainly part of the money retained by 'the EU' is spent on:
1) Setting up and running regulatory agencies (and, if we leave completely you will find out just how much we have to spend of 'our' money to replicate those agencies, as we will need to do if we continue to trade with the EU
2) Cost of EU administration. Which, can I remind you, has fewer civil servants than does the UK.
3)Cost of European Parliament, buildings, admin, secretariat, MEPs, MEPs pensions etc
4) Cost of the European Court of Justice, which arbitrates in trade disputes and matters of EU law (much of which the UK initiated)
5) I believe there is some aid given to poorer members of the EU to help them to grow their economies
6) Negotiation of trade deals for all the membership
That's off the top of my head. There is probably more.
I dissed the 'golf club' analogy yesterday, but, for heavens sake, if you join a club you don't expect to get your membership fee back in full, in cash, do you?
In return for the relatively modest amount retained in the EU (our contribution is less than 2% of GDP) we get free access to a massive market; 44% of our exports, worth many billions per year to the UK, are to the EU. And investment & jobs from industries who come here so that they can get barrier free entry into the EU market; like Nissan (the biggest shock for me on referendum night was Sunderland voting away the best thing that had happened to it for years)
Sorry if that wasn't enough for everyone....
But, you know..sovereignty 