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Warwick University- would you want any dgc of yours to go there?

(306 Posts)
maryeliza54 Fri 01-Feb-19 09:04:52

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-47060367

Just when you think that things can’t get any worse for women, this happens. I wouldn’t want any dgc of mine to go there now given the universities decision. What message does this send to both men and women? I’m off to find a petition to sign.

MissAdventure Sun 03-Feb-19 23:13:23

It must feel like a double betrayal to the women.
They thought the university had taken a strong stand against these people, but it turns out it was just a token telling off.

M0nica Mon 04-Feb-19 07:44:00

Ginny nothing these women did could make them safe from what happened to them. This was disgusting and vile discussion of the girls online between a group of young men. It is mental abuse not physical - and while physical protection is important. Behind every act of physical abuse is someone whose mind mentally abuses women as well, or in this case a group of men who felt they could talk in terms of hate and sexual aggression of women they mixed with everyday, acting like pleasant friends and acquaintances.

ffinochio, whether anyone on this thread has been raped or not, the effect of these men's actins on the women themselves has been highlighted and discussed every time. Further up this page I say exactly what you are saying.

Lollin Mon 04-Feb-19 08:12:44

If only students would speak out by withdrawing their applications but like days gone by , people put up and shut up - very sad times indeed. Warwick should be so ashamed.

KateF Mon 04-Feb-19 08:57:24

True there is always a screen dump.

Nonnie Mon 04-Feb-19 09:37:18

The article said that the men would be returning after the girls had finished.

Imo Warwick will now be the safest university because of all this attention. Some are saying this sort of thing goes on all the time with young men so at least Warwick is now aware of it and measures taken. We can never be sure anywhere is totally safe though.

Eloethan Mon 04-Feb-19 09:48:52

There have been lots of reports of this sort of behaviour in various universities, including those that some view as being academically superior. I believe these men should have been expelled, not least to discourage others from behaving in this way.

However, it is worrying that this sort of behaviour appears to be fairly commonplace, despite all the discussion and controversy about sexual harassment and sexist behaviour. It seems that it has completely passed some young men by.

ReadyMeals Mon 04-Feb-19 09:58:47

Punishment of the men is, of course, a separate issue from the safety of the women. For every man that is caught threatening to rape a woman, there are probably two more who'd like to but haven't been detected yet or haven't offended yet. And that goes for probably any uni or any neighborhood. Same with pedophiles. The danger would be if, by the uni expelling these men altogether, the women might feel safe and let their guard down. Sadly, we're not safe anywhere and must always exercise the same care we would if we knew there was an offender studying nearby.

ReadyMeals Mon 04-Feb-19 09:59:32

NB my above post looks a bit sexist, I really should have added that there are also female offenders.

ReadyMeals Mon 04-Feb-19 10:00:13

And male victims!!!

Elegran Mon 04-Feb-19 10:05:43

Young men have a strong interest in sex and sexual matters. The sexual impulse is at its height in the late teens and early twenties, which is also the age when they are thrown together with young women in centres of education. Those who have been to all-male schools may have a distorted image of women, as alien creatures whose main characteristic is their ability to rouse their lust and make them want to satisfy it. Add to that the standard male conviction that their own role is to be in charge and keep others in order, and the way that small boys are often indulged if they get aggressive and act outrageously ("he is a real boy!! Always in trouble!!") and you can get people who act like these boyos, saying that for "stealing food" the girls would be punished with rape. They are combining business with pleasure, and confusing their own desires with "justice". Hope they don't end up as high court judges.

Nonnie Mon 04-Feb-19 10:19:28

Ready that's true, remembering that poor chap in Croydon whose life was ruined by his ex-girlfriend who I don't think has been named and shamed despite his name being all over the media. It poses the question of whether the 'new evidence' which reduced the punishment, was something a girl did? Don't suppose we will ever know and not sure I want to.

PECS Mon 04-Feb-19 10:24:35

Oh please! Let's not dilute this situation with another , though equally immoral, one.

Elrel Mon 04-Feb-19 10:35:23

The Exeter students were more robustly dealt with I think.

M0nica Mon 04-Feb-19 10:55:49

All this stuff about boys in all male schools is stuff and nonsense.. More and more private schools, especially boarding schools are now mixed and these boys have a social group outside school along with their sisters and other female relatives and friends

I went to boarding school decades ago and even then however cloistered school was, in the holidays I was back home on an army base and mixing with other children on the base and by 17 dating the young officers.

Yes, men, and not just young men will have these vile thoughts and conversations but by responding immediately and punishing those who get found we make it clear to them that this type of talk and conversation is unacceptable and will be penalised if found out.

Jalima1108 Mon 04-Feb-19 12:24:47

Young men have a strong interest in sex and sexual matters

I wonder, though, if this was not so much about the sexual act but more about hatred, a weapon to use against women who had (unwittingly) annoyed them. Rape is, after all, used as a weapon of war.
At least one was also anti-Semitic and thought Hitler was a hero.

Two (at least) were members of the Student Union Exec - horrifying that they were probably 'leading lights' at the university, organising events etc and at the same time leading this nasty, vile secret life with others.

Their names are out there and this will follow them - the university may put it behind them but future employers may not.

Elegran Mon 04-Feb-19 12:44:13

One prospective employer has already done so.

Some men seem to confuse power and sex. They use positions of power to get sex, and use sexual relationships to exercise their power over women.

Iam64 Mon 04-Feb-19 12:48:23

How could anyone think that Warwick will be ' the safest university because of all this attention'. How can making this kind of statement without any evidence to back it up doesn't help anyone.
As others have said, there is evidence of sexual harassment on many university campuses. Families are the main source of influence as children are growing up. That remains the case, the influence of my parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles remains with me. We do have cultural problems in the UK which aren't helped by not challenging sexism and racism when we find it. It's not helped by trying to dilute what these young men did by dragging in an alleged false allegation against one young man.
The research evidence is clear, yes false allegations are made (by men as well as women). They are rare and the police should be able to investigate properly- specialist teams being closed down as part of austerity can only make things worse

Nonnie Mon 04-Feb-19 13:26:56

Iam the reason I think Warwick could be safer than other universities is because of the heightened awareness due to the publicity.

I think that outside influences are much greater than when we were growing up, we didn't have the Internet. As previously stated the parents of the 14 year old who committed suicide had no idea and they seemed like caring people to me.

Iam64 Mon 04-Feb-19 13:34:28

Nonnie, so far as I'm aware, heightened awareness would need to be accompanied by training and policies. We're living in such 'interesting times'. No platform for old style feminists like Germaine Greer and Jenny Murray because of their views on transgender.
So far as sexual responsibility goes, it does seem like one step forward and three back.

Nonnie Mon 04-Feb-19 13:38:37

Iam apparently there is a move to make universities stop preventing visiting speakers being banned because their views are unpopular. I think we should all try to be more open minded whenever possible

M0nica Mon 04-Feb-19 14:10:42

Jalima that is what made it so vile. It was all about hate and humiliation, through the weapon of sexual violence.

PECS Mon 04-Feb-19 14:29:50

Nonnie But not so open minded to think it is OK to talk & joke about raping your friends? The trouble with being too 'liberal' is that the boundaries that keep people safe start getting lost. I do agree we need as few rules as possible but people must feel and be safe too.

MissAdventure Mon 04-Feb-19 14:45:15

I think there's a vast difference between being interested in sex and being interested in rape.
I also think the pack mentality kicks in, not just with young men or women, but wherever groups of like minded people gather - be it the workplace, university, or anywhere else.

Nonnie Mon 04-Feb-19 15:14:54

PECS I haven't seen any suggestion that anyone is^so open minded to think it is OK to talk & joke about raping your friends?^. I am talking about life in general. Perhaps being open minded about where they may have learnt this behaviour rather than simply blaming their parents. Not everything is the fault of the parents and they will be feeling bad enough as it is without SM blaming them. Don't judge unless sure of the facts is my message to everyone.

MissAdventure Mon 04-Feb-19 15:17:30

I would hang my head in shame if I were the parent of one of these specimens, but not because I felt I was to blame.
Nice parents children sometimes do very bad things.