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Ageing disgracefully

(121 Posts)
GabriellaG54 Thu 06-Jun-19 15:58:51

Reading about one or two of the vets at the memorial gatherings I was disappointed and yes, disgusted to read that one nudged HM the Queen and made inappropriate remarks to Melanie Trump.
Now I know they are oldies but for heaven's sake, does that mean such behaviour can be overlooked or thought of as acceptable? I think not.
It's just grubby behaviour not chuckleworthy or nudge-nudge wink-wink.
My dad would never have crossed the line thinking his age would make it ok.
It isn't.

gillybob Thu 06-Jun-19 16:10:28

Did I miss something ? Did the veteran who fought to free us from the perils of Nazi Germany injure her maj when he gave her a gentle little nudge for goodness sake? Did he bend Mrs T over backwards and kiss her passionately?

I can’t imagine that Mrs T took his comment as anything other than a light hearted joke and if her maj was deeply offended ( or injured) then perhaps she could have him thrown in the tower ?

Whitewavemark2 Thu 06-Jun-19 16:14:40

gg54 a surprising remark from someone who is always admonishing us to lighten up.

sodapop Thu 06-Jun-19 16:15:55

I don't know about the Queen being nudged but the remark made to the First Lady was innocuous and made by someone from a different generation, surely nothing to get hot under the collar about. The term ' oldies' could also be considered inappropriate and demeaning to a gallant veteran.

kittylester Thu 06-Jun-19 16:21:24

Of course, they could have early stage dementia.

rosecarmel Thu 06-Jun-19 16:25:57

I'm thinking that by the time someone is in their 90's their gray matter has many gray areas -- and that each person who is subjected to the results of age related activity, or lack of, is often taken by surprise by it, resulting in a knee-jerk reaction to it-

Perhaps the remedy is to spend even more time in the company of others that brought about the reaction to begin with?

Elvive Thu 06-Jun-19 16:28:26

Oh Lordy, I think I might just about almost agree with you G.

I thought it was cringy. I do dislike the way extreme oldies think they can say yucky things.

Deedaa Thu 06-Jun-19 16:30:23

I suspect the Queen will have enjoyed a nudge from someone of her own generation. It can't happen very often now.

gillybob Thu 06-Jun-19 16:37:27

I wonder if there was a “wink wink” to go with the nudge nudge ? hmm

gillybob Thu 06-Jun-19 16:40:16

Her maj is either an incredible actor or else she really enjoyed Mr Trumps company . I am no royal fan but I enjoyed looking at the photos of the state visit and the veterans etc. She seems to be having a whale of a time. She has probably never laughed so much in ages.

Whitewavemark2 Thu 06-Jun-19 16:42:30

kitty are you talking about Trump?

gillybob Thu 06-Jun-19 16:52:14

Thinking about this a bit more ....when my grandma was in her mid/late 90’s she began saying things she might’ve thought, but would never have said out loud. Like telling people (me in particular) how fat they looked in a particular outfit, telling a carer that she reminded her of Andy Capp and once horror of horrors, asking a young occupational therapist if he was a homosexual. He didn’t bat an eye lid and just said “yes I am” . (I was horrified and apologised profusely) he said that he had heard a whole lot worse and not to worry.

The point I am making is that only a few years previous she would never have said such personal things.

Jabberwok Thu 06-Jun-19 17:11:34

My MIL (now dead-mercifully!!) once referred to the lovely Filipino carer in her care home as a "darkie "!!!!!!! It was awful, and SO mortifying . When we apologised abjectly explaining that MIL had lived in India before the war, (no excuse of course) the carer concerned was brilliant, accepted that she was very old, 96, and wasn't at all offended. Mind you MIL was told firmly by DH that she was NOT to refer to anyone in that manner!

janeainsworth Thu 06-Jun-19 17:17:23

I think someone of that generation would think they were making a gallant remark, to say to a younger woman that they wished they were 20 years younger.
I have to say that I think DT and Melania handled it pleasantly too.

janeainsworth Thu 06-Jun-19 17:29:30

janeainsworth Thu 06-Jun-19 17:31:45

I mean, what would be an appropriate remark for a 93-year- old gentleman to make to the First Lady?

M0nica Thu 06-Jun-19 17:59:29

The past is another country, they did things differently then

even the quite recent past and those in their 90s reflect the attitudes of the 40s and 50s, the equivalent of living in Scotland or Wales, they do some things differently, relax.

GabriellaG54 Thu 06-Jun-19 18:19:21

Oops! Melanie Melania blush

Jabberwok Thu 06-Jun-19 18:21:06

He only said, when greeting Melania, that he wished he were 20 years younger! Complimenting a pretty woman? Hardly a hanging offense!!! As for nudging the Queen, I can't find anything about that, so I doubt it was that serious!

Elvive Thu 06-Jun-19 19:07:42

even the quite recent past and those in their 90s reflect the attitudes of the 40s and 50s, the equivalent of living in Scotland or Wales

I think Scotland has always been ahead of its time and at the forefront of intelligent , modern thinking.I am less familiar with Wales but anywhere that people flit effortlessly between two languages has to be worth consideration.

jaylucy Fri 07-Jun-19 10:02:50

You read about it? Unless you were there and witnessed it, sorry, but you are in no position to decide what was or wasn't appropriate on the occasion!
Quite frankly, if it managed to make Mrs Trump smile, that can't be a bad thing!

Dillyduck Fri 07-Jun-19 10:05:27

Did you stop and think for one minute that the elderly person might have dementia??

crazyH Fri 07-Jun-19 10:10:32

It made Melanie smile and that says it all.

AcornFairy Fri 07-Jun-19 10:15:42

Unbelieveable! Get a grip GabriellaG54!! Political correctness gone mad.

suzied Fri 07-Jun-19 10:16:13

Maybe you should familiarise yourself with some of Trump's comments about women. You seem to find them acceptable.