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What would you do? (Trust dilemma)

(191 Posts)
Amagran Mon 21-Oct-19 15:07:43

I’m sorry, but I’m not sure which forum to post my dilemma on, so I hope it’s ok here.

The thing is, I have got someone lined up to do a job for me in the house, well actually it’s to install a new central heating system and boiler.

He seems like a really nice guy, ever-so posh and a really good laugh. He has promised me that he will get the job done quickly and has given me a really good quote for the job.

The thing is, I’ve asked around and found that he has never actually completed any job to anyone’s satisfaction, has told one lie after another and is a bit of a ladies’ man (although this last doesn’t bother me). He is apparently being investigated for fraud in one job he did. I even asked his sister what she thought and she said she wouldn’t trust him.

He has promised me that he will get the job done by 31st October or he'll die trying, but to be honest some of the things he is planning to do to cut corners seem a little bit left of the law to me. I am also a bit concerned that he has not actually signed the quote he has given me.

I would really value everyone’s opinion – do you think I should trust him and let him into my house?

NotSpaghetti Wed 23-Oct-19 00:41:38

My mother in law changed her boiler last year. It was totally unnecessary but she "didn't like" the one she had.

It was expensive to do, but does work.
It has, however taken her some time to work out the little quirks and she's still not running it "properly".

I think she is stuck with this boiler now, like it or not.
Of course, she wouldn't say even if it was rubbish as she was determined to change it.

At least the person who fitted it had suitable qualifications and didn't do a bodge-job. He was quite meticulous and took his time... and, unlike "Dave" he did clear up his own mess!

Labaik Wed 23-Oct-19 00:39:13

It cheered me up no end smile….

Fiachna50 Wed 23-Oct-19 00:14:55

Amagran- no bother, very clever btw.?

Amagran Tue 22-Oct-19 23:58:19

Well, thank you so much everyone for your contributions. It has been a lot of fun trying to make light of the awful mess we are in.

It is bizarre, isn't it, that none of us would dream of letting the character I described in my OP into our houses to change a fuse let alone a whole central heating system, yet around 50% of the country are happy to have this very same character as PM making decisions on every aspect of our daily existence and our relationships with Europe and the rest of the world. But hey, that's democracy - the worst system of government in the whole world, except for all the rest. (Churchill, I believe.)

Thank you again to all who responded in good faith with caring and concerned suggestions. It says much about you that your first reaction was to try to protect someone who appeared vulnerable.
My purpose was to make a point (previous para), not to try to trick you or make you feel silly. Thank you for being good sports. flowers

mcem Tue 22-Oct-19 18:02:20

Well I admit to having letters after my name but know nothing about boilers.
I think the biggest concern here is to avoid being gullible and making ill-informed decisions!
I don't think I can add to this thread so I have to leave you to it OP.

Nonnie Tue 22-Oct-19 17:25:08

mcem what about all those clever people who have letters after their names and that? Don't they all know lots of good stuff which little people like me don't? I thought they knew lots of technical stuff like how things work and what happens if they don't. Of course I know I shouldn't believe them just as they are, like, clever and have funny stuff like qualifications.

NotTooOld Tue 22-Oct-19 17:22:29

grin grin grin

mcem Tue 22-Oct-19 17:17:30

Who'd pay any attention nowadays to 'experts'?

SirChenjin Tue 22-Oct-19 17:13:58

Just be careful who you ask - make sure you don’t go to people with a vested interest in supplying him with that new boiler (or someone he was at school with - you know what those posho networks are like)

Nonnie Tue 22-Oct-19 17:11:51

Surely you can find some 'Experts' to ask? There must be all sorts of organisations with expertise who could advise you on the likelihood of your heating system working or not if you let him go ahead? They can do lots of really clever sums and stuff, they got proper educated and that.

mcem Tue 22-Oct-19 17:09:55

I don't think any of those organisations could give the OP the advice she's looking for.

Fiachna50 Tue 22-Oct-19 16:53:04

No way, go onto Trusted Traders or Age Concern or even your local councils website. Word of mouth is very reliable usually. The guy sounds dodgy but seems to have convinced you with his charm.

Nonnie Tue 22-Oct-19 16:50:59

Are you being too hard on him? Could it be that he is a bit simple minded behind all the bluster? Have you thought that he may be being used as a puppet by someone behind the scenes. From what you say it appears that he has been used by women so he may not be very bright after all.

DH loved this!

Labaik Tue 22-Oct-19 16:24:17

Yes; but as a BAB I now no longer have to worry about how my actions might have an adverse effect on other people.

Urmstongran Tue 22-Oct-19 16:03:55

Labaik Tue 22-Oct-19 14:09:26

Honestly Labaik I don’t know whether to laugh or cry at reading this.

When you shrug your shoulders and say you sleep well at night and your choices are nothing to do with anyone else, that’s fair enough but on other threads you have berated others labelling them as ‘selfish’!

mcem Tue 22-Oct-19 15:56:40

You mustn't be fooled by an idiot masquerading as someone who knows what he is doing!
Rise above those that tell you just to go for it and get it done. No intelligent person would cave into the pressure imposed on you.
Be brave! Don't surrender! Don't listen to those who say your home will be warm only if you spend a huge amount of cash when you know deep in your heart of hearts that you must take this seriously and think of your wider family who in time to come may criticise you. Rise and say that you've thought again, that you regret the wasted time but say No Thank You.
You know it makes sense!!!!!

Amagran Tue 22-Oct-19 14:37:49

But mcem, if I can't trust a posh buffoon with unkempt hair and his shirt hanging half out of his trousers, who can I trust?

He looks so much like the PM he could almost be the PM!

Labaik Tue 22-Oct-19 14:09:26

In reply to Amagran; I sleep well at night, thank you. We are all masters of our own fate, I believe and, if my actions do cause problems for someone else, well, they should have factored that into things. Their fault. Not my problem.

Labaik Tue 22-Oct-19 14:04:06

But I assumed that, having taken it this far the OP couldn't now go back on giving him the work. I mean he's given up his time to go to her house and provide a quote [probably gave up some of his valuable time chatting to her as well because he's that sort of chap] so there's no way she can go back on this now. Other than, perhaps, deciding to keep her old boiler? But that isn't now possible, is it. Surely she's legally bound to give him the work [I'm not very knowledgeable about these things].

mcem Tue 22-Oct-19 13:58:03

Come on anagram just bite the bullet and admit he might be conning you.
I'm sure if he gave you dodgy advice and iffy estimates he couldn't take you to court over it.
Stop! Think again! You aren't yet committed to a contract and have every right to change your mind. Please let us know how things go.

Nightsky2 Tue 22-Oct-19 13:54:52

You could always offer the work to a certain Mr Corbyn as I’m pretty sure he’ll be looking for work very soon, could even be as early as Nov, 1st, I’m sure his rates are very reasonable. Some very nasty people around so do be very careful. He has a mate who’s name is McDonald. You can’t be too careful, can you?.
You don’t have to worry about him being too posh or even a little bit posh, just a couple of nice working class men.
Make sure you ask for a guarantee as I’ve heard a few people say he’s a bit dodgy.hmm

GillT57 Tue 22-Oct-19 13:54:28

Yes Labaik he looks such a decent, honest man, the kind who would buy you a pint in the pub, probably also get permission for you to smoke too, he can't be doing with all this health and safety nonsense! He must be some kind of authority on plumbing and heating, he is always on BBC, giving his advice and opinion, they really rate him. He has even got his own call in advice service on LBC I think, where you can phone and ask him about plumbing issues, have you tried that Amagran? May be worth a try if the other chap is busy.

Amagran Tue 22-Oct-19 13:48:00

That's him, Labaik! He does look trustworthy and honest - pity though that his face couldn't be a bit more orange, like the nice Trump man.

I am gutted by your suggestion that he might be destitute if I don't give him the work - I think this could be the deciding factor in whether or not to trust him. Your visions of him lying dead in a ditch...….Oh, Labaik, how do you sleep at night?

mcem Tue 22-Oct-19 13:42:01

Notspaghetti a wise post!
Surely no-one would take this on if there are rumours in the area about this bloke's honesty and experience.
Really OP you've been well warned and if you remain blinkered like this you'll regret it.

Labaik Tue 22-Oct-19 13:37:57

I've seen him. Saw a picture of him in a gold coloured building with that gorgeous Trump man. He must be doing well business wise as he doesn't have to work very much to live quite comfortably. Looks very trustworthy, too. Good, honest face.