Nearly 1 million children faced destitution in the UK in 2022..

MibbsXX, my heart goes out to you and your family, terribly stressful way to live. Please do contact Step Change, Christians Against Poverty and/or any community group. You will get the help and support which is needed now and hopefully find a way through this. All the best x

I am quite staggered to find that people seem to think that feckless parenting accounts for 1 million children living in destitution. That's one hell of a lot of feckless parents. And what about the remainder of the 2.8 adults living in destitution? Are they feckless, too?

Do we have any stories of layabout single wastrels to tell which prove that destitution is all their own fault?

A slight exaggeration Maizie?

Mibbs is right, the increases in domestic oil were huge and we got no government help whatsoever. Then factor in lack of public transport, no infrastructure and you live in rural poverty. It has been something that seems to be getting worse again.

I want to write something without it seeming personal but where are all these negative stereotypes of people that you witness? I work with people on low pay, live near them, shop with them. I take no judgement on them as from what I see, everyone is trying to do their best. I also have the imagination to understand how having children limits your choice of paid employment and sometimes leads to unemployment, especially in an environment where low paid work can mean a 'fast paced, flexible work environment' which means you are at someones beck and call, on terrible wages, often poor working environments and believe me, you are worked like a dog to meet targets. How is all this sustainable for good outcomes for children and families? and there are single people and couples too who are struggling just as much.

Even if the parents are the most feckless and irresponsible people on the planet, how on earth does that justify a child suffering? We used to have a thing called social responsibility, which meant that children received from the state the support theit parents could not, or would not, provide.
It was a system that provided high quality reasonable priced accommodation, gave mothers and babies nutritional support, provided regular health checks for school children and a free school dentistt.It fed children, clothed them and checked on them. Parents are not the only people with responsibility for a child, society should care for them. It takes a village to raise a child.

Grans are old people who are tired, often ill and becoming increasingly frail

Crikey - that cheered me up.

Kandinsky yes the truth hurts

Germanshepherdsmum

A slight exaggeration Maizie?

Not at all, GSM. The minute anyone talks about poverty, malnutrition, low educational attainment; about anything associated with deprivation and inequality up pop the right wingers to tell us how it's all self inflicted and give us examples of the feckless, spendthrift, ne'er do well neglectful parents or individuals they know or have known as though they comprise the whole body of the deprived and they only have to pull themselves together to be thoroughly better people.

There always have been, and there always will be, hopeless individuals who can't cope in one way or another but the assumption that everyone in difficult circumstances is the same is just wrong. And unpleasant.

Grans are old people who are tired, often ill and becoming increasingly frail.

Jeez... that's a bit ageist, ronib.

I've known people who were Grans in their 40s. Old, ill and frail? I think not...

I had a disabled child and my husband worked, it was still bloody difficult

Well this Gran is definitely not in her 40s …… and I don’t see any point pretending otherwise MaizieD.
Do you have any idea of how energetic/demanding a 3 year old can be to someone in their mid 70s? Okay pretty special too …..

JenniferEccles

Parents have the primary responsibility for their children’s well-being., don’t they? If everyone only had the children their finances allowed, all would be well.The problem arises when they continue to produce more children, but then of course the welfare state is obliged to step in, as it does if people fall on hard times through no fault of their own.

GSM is correct. The bankers bonuses won’t take money from the ‘poor’.

That didn't take long. I have just been reminded why I had to take a break from GN.

Germanshepherdsmum

As a partner in a law firm I was self-employed. I paid tax at the same rates as everyone else.

Well why wouldn't you? What is your opinion of people like Rees Mogg who is paid dividends and loans via Southern Ireland? Or the Tesco CEO whose salary is paid wholly in S Ireland? Immoral? Fair? Deserving?

as though they comprise the whole body of the deprived … the assumption that everyone in difficult circumstances is the same - nobody on this thread has said that Maizie. The accusation is yours alone.

GrannyGravy13

It is never the child’s fault.

You are right. It is never the child's fault.

It seems to be, from what I see on TV and media, that it is often not the mother's fault either because whenever a struggling family is shown, more often than not, the mother is a struggling single Mum.
I find myself asking "Where's the father?"

And yes, we know from experience of some family members and that of friends (and at the risk of sounding misandrist) in many cases the father has left and is finding ways to get out of supporting his children financially.

How someone can do that, I do not know.

Germanshepherdsmum

A slight exaggeration Maizie?

Well, I have a few tales over the years of fathers who seem to have had the ability to hide their income and resent paying for the upkeep of the children they fathered.

A proper school dinner for every child of all ages, not means tested, would be a start.

Callistemon21

Germanshepherdsmum

A slight exaggeration Maizie?

Well, I have a few tales over the years of fathers who seem to have had the ability to hide their income and resent paying for the upkeep of the children they fathered.

I have a tale you could add to your collection.

MaizieD

Germanshepherdsmum

A slight exaggeration Maizie?

Not at all, GSM. The minute anyone talks about poverty, malnutrition, low educational attainment; about anything associated with deprivation and inequality up pop the right wingers to tell us how it's all self inflicted and give us examples of the feckless, spendthrift, ne'er do well neglectful parents or individuals they know or have known as though they comprise the whole body of the deprived and they only have to pull themselves together to be thoroughly better people.

There always have been, and there always will be, hopeless individuals who can't cope in one way or another but the assumption that everyone in difficult circumstances is the same is just wrong. And unpleasant.

The majority of single parents (mainly mothers) are in their 30s and have been married or in a stable relationship. Presumably they didn't envisage a relationship break up when their children were conceived.

Callistemon21

Germanshepherdsmum

A slight exaggeration Maizie?

Well, I have a few tales over the years of fathers who seem to have had the ability to hide their income and resent paying for the upkeep of the children they fathered.

There is very little you can do if a parent (usually a father) is determined not to pay, he will change jobs frequently, work for cash or move overseas.

Germanshepherdsmum

^as though they comprise the whole body of the deprived … the assumption that everyone in difficult circumstances is the same^ - nobody on this thread has said that Maizie. The accusation is yours alone.

I don't think you've quite taken in the disgust I feel when posters' response to the fact that people in this supposedly wealthy country are destitute is to trot out a story implying that it is all their fault.

Why is it even necessary to do that? Shutting their eyes to the devastation of our nation by their chosen political party? Genetic inability to empathise? Virtue signalling?

It certainly reminds me why I never have, and never ever will vote tory...

There is no assumption whatsoever on my part that everyone in difficult circumstances is at fault, nor have I even implied that that is the case. The thread turned to people who have many children and I gave an example of one such couple. Suddenly that becomes ‘it is all their fault’. In the case of that couple, yes it was.

I know all about men who refuse to pay for their children after deserting them, and the ruses they employ. I was married to one.

Germanshepherdsmum

There is no assumption whatsoever on my part that everyone in difficult circumstances is at fault, nor have I even implied that that is the case. The thread turned to people who have many children and I gave an example of one such couple. Suddenly that becomes ‘it is all their fault’. In the case of that couple, yes it was.

I know all about men who refuse to pay for their children after deserting them, and the ruses they employ. I was married to one.

It doesn't matter who is at fault as far as the parents are concerned. It is never the child's fault, so why should the child suffer? I can see in your views the influence of Victorian and Christian thinking, such as the deserving and undeserving poor and the concept of original sin. We had I thought moved past such things.

As for the concept that bankers don't take money from the poor, the billions the government gave to rescue the banks could have been spent elsewhere
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2008_United_Kingdom_bank_rescue_package#:~:text=At%20its%20peak%2C%20the%20cash,been%20recouped%20over%20the%20years.
And the banker's bonuses come as hundreds of bank branches are closed and the staff made redundant. Arguably they are creating the poor.

It’s investment bankers who get the big bonuses Glorianny, not those working in retail banking.

Bank employees in high street banks do not have the same skills as merchant bankers, investment bankers - Goldman Sachs etc. Rishi Sunak has direct knowledge of investment banking. I go with his approach to growth in banking and only time will tell if it is helping more people than the Labour approach of stuff the rich. Robin Hood and all that.