Breaking sad news

I remember when one of our guinea pigs died. My daughter was heartbroken. You can't shield them from this sadly its part if life, all you can do is give them hugs. She cried it out of her system and then was OK.

This is never easy, but you have to do it when necessary. I'm going to have to tell my wife about Cinders in a couple of days time. She will be distraught and that will set me off again. We will get over it in time and may be get another Black Cat but how can we keep her or him safe. Cats can be house cats but Cinders had always been able to go out. She was so unlucky as was her mother Suki 3 years earlier. Still so very raw but sharing it here does help and hope it does not depress too much. Thank you all so much for kind words - but I need to move on. When I have told my wife then we can start to heal properly.

My grandchildren lost both of their dogs last week. They were very elderly and had been part of the family before they were born. The two youngest were fine after an initial bout of crying but the oldest who’s just nine was very upset for longer. It brought about some very uncomfortable questions about death, cremations and what comes after. At least I was uncomfortable with the questions. I was aware they are not my children and my beliefs may not match their mums. I also firmly believe that I shouldn’t lie to them. G.C “is there such a place as heaven nanna?” Me “ I’m not sure but lots of people truly believe that there is. If there is I’m sure that dogs are there too” I’ve had no come back from their parents so I must have done an ok job.

We lost our cat this week - knocked down on the road right outside our house. All 3 DGC took the news philosophically. DGS aged 10 was interested to hear the gory details and inspect the grave in the garden, DGD1, aged 8, who has a cat of her own, instigated a lengthy discussion, about how you cannot 'train' cats like you can train dogs and pointed out that our cat was 'well old' and not so nimble on his feet. DGD1, also 10 and extremely fond of Cassidy, phoned me to express her sympathy and to reassure me that he would not have suffered, death would have been instantaneous.

All 3 DGC love animals but surprised me with how matter of fact they were and how they understand that pets do not live as long as humans and that the pleasure they bring will always be tempered with coping with their loss.

Your DD may well surprise you and be less upset than you are. I would tell her father, to let her know in advance of her visit and try to keep the whole thing as low key as possible.

Good idea to let her father know first
Icbn. Then you have to be honest and talk it through with her. At 14 she does not need platitudes etc. However small our pets are we love them and need to grieve for a while.
Life is sad at times but her hamster has given her great pleasure as well.

All good advice so far.
Our DC realised that hammies have a short life, were sad, we had a tiny funeral in the garden, and a week or so later bought another one at the local pet shop.

All excellent advice specially from lemongrove when you first get a smaller pet make sure the child can understand if possible the short lifespan that the animal has.

At 14 I realise that there is no need for anything other than the reality. I just worry about her being such a sensitive soul with such an overwhelmingly caring nature towards animals & all creatures no matter how miniscule they are.
She is well aware that tiny pets such as hamsters do have a relatively short life span; also well aware that little 'Beau' has not been too well recently, been administering medication etc etc. But I don't think she's quite prepared herself for this sad news.....